Five presuppositions that help us deal with disillusionment with God

We may not admit the truth even to ourselves, but disillusionment

with God is not uncommon among ministry leaders. And when it comes, it is often accompanied by an underlying anger that spills over in unexpected ways, onto unsuspecting people. Our personal issues with God become toxic as we struggle with the disconnect between our theology and painful personal experience. From this dissonance flows a poisonous mix of anger and bitterness. After all, there is no anger more personal than anger at God—anger that He allows or even causes circumstances that we believe He should not.

This is a dangerous moment for leaders because the relentless undercurrent of anger hurts those we lead, and our followers end up walking on eggshells around us. Where can we go for restoration in those situations? We go back to five basic truths and principles that must drive our spiritual leadership and must be the presuppositions from which we think, live, and minister. These core truths are what help us move toward God rather than away from Him when suffering comes our way.

One: God is good all the time, even though we live in a fallen world. We can always count on His goodness; we must trust in it, for if God is not good, nothing proclaimed in Scripture about Him can be trusted (see Romans 8:28-39; Psalm 23).

Two: God’s goodness does not preclude us from suffering. Indeed, we share in the fellowship of His sufferings (see Philippians 3:10), and our scars become trophies if we trust Him in the midst of our pain. 

Three: God’s ways are indeed inscrutable to human eyes—majestic,

eternal, sovereign, and divinely good in ways that we cannot understand this side of eternity (see Romans 9; Job 38-42).

Four: God has an eternal purpose in all things that transcends our limited understanding. That purpose is good and will be fulfilled as the glory of God becomes known across our globe. Often failure and pain are the antecedents to amazing glory and eternal success (see Isaiah 40).

Five: We play a humble part in God’s eternal purposes and cannot take personal responsibility for the completion of His plan. When we carry a burden of responsibility that He was meant to carry, we become weary, disillusioned, and often angry. We must leave His purposes and His burdens in His hands and watch Him unfold His inscrutable plan through us (see Ephesians 2:10).

Ed Stetzer interview with ebola survivor's family

Ebola and the Glory of God: An Interview with Nancy Writebol's Family (including Nancy's Comments)

Nancy Writebol has been released from the hospital. I interviewed her family about how they've dealt with the situation. |

Ed Stetzer

Why mission agencies do not pay ransom for staff who are kidnapped

The news that ISIS had demanded ransom for James Foley has raised the issue in the media about whether such payments should be made. Many countries quietly do just that. It is also an issue in the mission community since many staff work in places that put them at risk for kidnapping for ransom.

Most mission agencies at least in the United States have a policy that they will not pay ransom for kidnapped staff. It is based on the premise that however we handle the situation, we cannot put other missionaries at risk by our actions. Paying ransom simply encourages terrorist groups to repeat their actions since it pays off. This is why Somalia terrorists keep hijacking ships in the Indian Ocean. They have learned from experience that the companies will settle and it becomes a money making enterprise.

Mission agencies do have resources at their disposal for the negotiation or rescue of kidnapped staff. These are highly trained professionals who come out of the security world. If handled well, there is a very high probability of a positive outcome for kidnapped staff. Of course, groups like ISIS may change that equation as their ruthlessness is second to none. Good agencies have well thought out plans for crisis situations and update those plans regularly as threats emerge.

In today's world it is critical that we pray for the safety of our missionaries and national partners. It is an increasingly unsafe world where the tentacles of evil can reach almost anywhere. That is not to say we should live in fear but it is to say that we should pray for God's protection. 

If womens voices were heard in the church, it would be far healthier

Most churches have all male leadership - which I understand as most (but not all) evangelicals in the US are of the complimentarian rather than the egalitarian perspective. I do not intend to enter that debate here but to suggest that it often leaves out a significant voice in the average congregation. Men and women often process situations and issues differently. Thus, when the voice of women (50+ percent of a local church's constituency) is not heard, there is often a serious deficit in wisdom, decision making and perspective.

Not long ago I consulted with a congregation that had experienced major problems. In interviewing many people I found that the women in ministry positions (paid and volunteer) had a far better grasp of the issues in the church than the elders did. Yet they had never been asked for their perspective or wisdom. Ironically, there was more hands on ministry taking place among the women than the men, yet there voice was not valued or heard by the majority of the male leadership. 

Thankfully, that has changed and there is now a leadership community that includes both men and women - even though the church is complimentarian in its theology. They have found a forum to include both the voices of men and women without violating their theology. It indicates wisdom because no church will be healthy without the voice of both men and women being heard in appropriate settings.

It saddens me when women are marginalized in the church. In most churches they are the group that prays the most, serves the most and in many ways cares the most. Yet their voice is often not heard. Wisdom would be to ask the women ministry leaders in every congregation if they feel heard, valued and included. And, to ask them what issues they see that should be heard and considered by the leadership. You might be surprised by the wisdom you hear!

I suspect that Jesus listened far more carefully to the women who followed him and gave them far more respect than many male church leaders do. It gives one pause.

Reminder. My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

I feel like a failure as a leader

In my role as an organizational leader or consultant with other organizations it is not unusual to tell leaders that they are not in their ideal lane or playing to their skill set. This may be a pastor who cannot and does not manage staff, organizational leaders that are ineffective in determining how to accomplish their vision or leaders who have no idea how the shadow side of their strengths disempowers others. Often, the conversation about "lanes" and sweet spots is a result of being asked to help solve issues within the organization that are a result of a leader being out of their lane.

Here is the common but totally wrong response: "I have failed as a leader." Why wrong? Because all of us will generally be substandard at those things God did not wire us to do. We were wired on purpose by God to do the "good works" he designed specifically for us and gifted for that purpose (Ephesians 2:10). Of course we will be successful if we apply ourselves at those things He designed us for and conversely we will be poor at those things He did not design us for.

When we are not in our lane, and don't do well, the solution is not to work harder, longer or try to learn a new set of wiring. Rather it is to acknowledge how God created and designed us and get into a role that is inside the lane He designed us to play. When we work in the wrong lane we frustrate ourselves and those around us. When we run in the lane He designed us for we flourish and do well. 

Getting in our lane requires us to understand first what we are not good at and accept it. Some years ago I interviewed many members of an organizations staff and then shared with the leader what he was really good at and what he was really bad at. One of his first concerns was that his staff not know the weaknesses he had! The humor in it was that I knew about those weaknesses because his staff shared them with me. Yet he was not comfortable admitting that he had weaknesses. This is not only insecurity but bad theology because God gave us a gift or gifts but not more than a few. My staff will readily tell me what I don't do well and they work hard to keep me out of those lanes so their lives are easier!

It also means that we focus on those things we are good at and allow others to do what we are not good at. Usually, when leaders get into things that they are not gifted for they create chaos and disempowerment by doing so. Staff want to say, "Don't do that! You just put your nose into things that I can do very well and which you don't. Stay in your lane!" If you are a secure leader, simply ask your staff for examples where you operate out of your lane of giftedness and create problems for them. Pastors are often guilty of disempowering staff by getting into things that others are tasked with and which others also do much better than they.

If you are out of your lane, don't feel like you have failed as a leader. Rather, work to get into a place where you are playing to your strengths and don't assume you should be great at everything. You are not. No one is. Often our failure is simply in not understanding or accepting the lane God made us for. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Thoughts on Fergusun

A moving blog from the Gospel Coalition

A surprising map of the world's most and least religiously diverse countries

See this very helpful article on religious diversity across our globe. You may well be surprised.

A surprising map of the world's most and least religiously diverse countries