What are you really and truly good at? And as you get older are you getting better at what you are truly good at?
This is a matter of focus. Where we shine is a sign of how God make and wired us (Ephesians 2:10). So finding ways to focus on those areas makes all the sense in the world.
I write a blog, and books, because God made me to write among a few other things. The more I do it the better I become (on most days). If I ignored it, or allowed other things to crowd it out it would not develop as it could.
Generally we shine at two or three things. And we feel God's smile when we do those things. We know we are in our lane and we are filled and satisfied. Knowing those things and finding ways to use those gifts allows us to hone them and grow them.
What are you truly good at? Are you taking the time to develop those gifts or does the busyness of life crowd them out? Getting better at what God made us for is part of the stewardship of our lives.
And it is satisfying to our soul. It is how God made us.
Friday, July 18, 2014
Thursday, July 17, 2014
The loss of hospitality and deep relationships
We are in the process of looking for a flat/condo after living in our small twin home for 28 years. Using a nifty program I get regular updates for all condos for sale in the Twin Cities. Not having been in the housing market for a long time, I am noticing the wonderful kitchens, updated bathrooms, and all the improvements that have been made in the past three decades.
But one thing stands out in a huge way. The living room areas are small and designed in a way that allows for a couch and a few chairs that in almost every instance face a wall with fireplace and television.
Now granted, these flats - the ones I am looking at are not large, they are 1,300 to 2,000 square feet. But, looking at the living room space it is clear that they are not meant for entertaining or having friends over, nor for individuals to be talking to one another but for sitting and watching TV. In other words, little hospitality or conversation (even with spouses) but TV time. In many ways it is a metaphor for our age. Now I also understand that places like Starbucks or the local coffee shop may be the new place for gathering with friends, but still something is lost when people are not let into our own space - our home.
I am not a television prude and I love fireplaces. But I am committed to relationships and hospitality, both deeply Christian values and it sparked a question in my mind about whether we as a culture are losing those values. How we use our spaces says something about how we live and what we value. Many of the flats I have looked are also in the city where unfortunately life is more anonymous though it need not be.
Our life with Jesus is a relationship. Our life with others is a relationship. Influence and friendships come from relationship. The deepest and most meaningful things in life all stem from relationship. In the busyness of life today, many are too consumed with their own stuff for relationships. But life is about relationships.
All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence, are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.
But one thing stands out in a huge way. The living room areas are small and designed in a way that allows for a couch and a few chairs that in almost every instance face a wall with fireplace and television.
Now granted, these flats - the ones I am looking at are not large, they are 1,300 to 2,000 square feet. But, looking at the living room space it is clear that they are not meant for entertaining or having friends over, nor for individuals to be talking to one another but for sitting and watching TV. In other words, little hospitality or conversation (even with spouses) but TV time. In many ways it is a metaphor for our age. Now I also understand that places like Starbucks or the local coffee shop may be the new place for gathering with friends, but still something is lost when people are not let into our own space - our home.
I am not a television prude and I love fireplaces. But I am committed to relationships and hospitality, both deeply Christian values and it sparked a question in my mind about whether we as a culture are losing those values. How we use our spaces says something about how we live and what we value. Many of the flats I have looked are also in the city where unfortunately life is more anonymous though it need not be.
Our life with Jesus is a relationship. Our life with others is a relationship. Influence and friendships come from relationship. The deepest and most meaningful things in life all stem from relationship. In the busyness of life today, many are too consumed with their own stuff for relationships. But life is about relationships.
All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence, are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.
The ministry machine: do you run your organization or does it run you?
Has the industrial age changed our ministries in ways that are problematic? Read this intriguing article from Holy Soup. It is worth thinking about.
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
For those of us in the business of communicating: Ten tips for better slide decks
The following article on preparing great slide show presentations is worth the read for those of us who spend our lives communicating.
Tuesday, July 15, 2014
Ten marks of a united church leadership board
United boards are a critical part of the health of a congregation since the congregation will often reflect the health or dishealth of its board. Consider these marks of a united board and think about your own board.
One: There is absolute freedom to bring one's opinion and view to the table. Unity does not mean we think alike. In fact, many boards that look unified because there is not disagreement are not unified at all. There simply is not the safety to be honest and elephants multiply.
Two: There is deep respect for one another and for differing points of view. Respect goes to how we treat each other and interact with one another.
Three: Jesus is central. If Jesus is not central to all of our planning and discussions you are left with competing agendas of what the church is or should be. The church is about Jesus and He is the unifying factor for any church board.
Four: Once decisions are made all will support that decision outside the board room. Unity is a choice and it must be made over and over as we submit to the will of the majority. The board always speaks with one unified voice.
Five: When tempers flare, forgiveness is asked for and received quickly. Unity does not mean that we cannot strongly differ. It does mean that we keep very short accounts.
Six: Prayer is central to the decision making process. If Jesus is central to all we do, talking to Him before we make decisions is central to how we proceed. Boards that pray together are far more unified than those who don't. Jesus unifies them.
Seven: Factions are called out. Divided boards are a recipe for a divided congregation. Divisions on the board that become apparent need to be called out and repented of. If not, they become permanent fixtures on the board.
Eight: There are no elephants. Many times we avoid hard subjects because we are afraid of conflict. Unresolved issues are even more dangerous than conflict. If there are elephants, name them.
Nine: Ego's are checked at the door. If it is about Jesus it is not about me or getting my way. Humility is required for a unified board. Together we seek God's way not our way.
Ten: Personal transparency is cultivated. Individuals who can be transparent about their personal lives are far more able to be honest and candid about ministry issues. As we pray for one another we get to know one another and that breeds respect and a desire to work together. If it's all business it is not a church board.
All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence, are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.
One: There is absolute freedom to bring one's opinion and view to the table. Unity does not mean we think alike. In fact, many boards that look unified because there is not disagreement are not unified at all. There simply is not the safety to be honest and elephants multiply.
Two: There is deep respect for one another and for differing points of view. Respect goes to how we treat each other and interact with one another.
Three: Jesus is central. If Jesus is not central to all of our planning and discussions you are left with competing agendas of what the church is or should be. The church is about Jesus and He is the unifying factor for any church board.
Four: Once decisions are made all will support that decision outside the board room. Unity is a choice and it must be made over and over as we submit to the will of the majority. The board always speaks with one unified voice.
Five: When tempers flare, forgiveness is asked for and received quickly. Unity does not mean that we cannot strongly differ. It does mean that we keep very short accounts.
Six: Prayer is central to the decision making process. If Jesus is central to all we do, talking to Him before we make decisions is central to how we proceed. Boards that pray together are far more unified than those who don't. Jesus unifies them.
Seven: Factions are called out. Divided boards are a recipe for a divided congregation. Divisions on the board that become apparent need to be called out and repented of. If not, they become permanent fixtures on the board.
Eight: There are no elephants. Many times we avoid hard subjects because we are afraid of conflict. Unresolved issues are even more dangerous than conflict. If there are elephants, name them.
Nine: Ego's are checked at the door. If it is about Jesus it is not about me or getting my way. Humility is required for a unified board. Together we seek God's way not our way.
Ten: Personal transparency is cultivated. Individuals who can be transparent about their personal lives are far more able to be honest and candid about ministry issues. As we pray for one another we get to know one another and that breeds respect and a desire to work together. If it's all business it is not a church board.
All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence, are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.
Monday, July 14, 2014
Remembering what the gospel is all about
When I saw this picture from our team in Rome it instantly reminded me of what Jesus does for each of us. He liberates us from our past, gives us a vision for our future, brings us life, joy, purpose and meaning. If a picture can say it better than any words, this one does! It says freedom, inexpressible joy, liberation, new life, and abundant LIFE. It is the defeat of the one who robs us of life and a victory for the One who gives life in all of its abundance - Jesus! (John 10:10).
In our service of Jesus, never forget that the Good News is all about the life change and liberation that Jesus brings, one life at a time. The family above has been finding that liberation one at a time over a period of years. If you have family members who don't know Jesus, don't give up. The same with friends, and colleagues and neighbors. When the Holy Spirit breaks through everything changes. Everything!
Take a moment and think back to your experience when the Holy Spirit broke through in your life and then remember that is what He desired for everyone. Celebrate His work in your life and pray for those who need it in theirs.
All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence, are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.
Saturday, July 12, 2014
How accessible should those in ministry be to all those who want their attention or help?
For those in full time ministry (and others) there is the ongoing challenge of our availability to the many who want our attention or help. Most go into ministry because they have a deep love for God and people and the people needs are many. Where do we draw the line on our availability? What boundaries do we set so that our own health is not compromised? This is especially an issue for pastors.
Let's start with the proposition that there are always more needs than we can meet. That means there are limits to our ability to help. Too often, however, the only thing that keeps us from doing more is that we are so exhausted that we cannot. At some point physical or emotional exhaustion kicks in and forces us to back off but that is already an unhealthy place to be. The more we bump up against physical or emotional limits the greater our own risk of being the one in need!
How do we know when too much is too much? All of our circumstances are different but let me suggest four questions that can help us evaluate when we need to back off.
When my availability to others keeps me from getting the rest and refreshment I need or the time with Jesus I need, it is too much! Running on empty is not a healthy place to be for any period of time. Only healthy people can help others and when our own health is in jeopardy we are too available and need to back off. If my ministry for Jesus detracts from my time with Jesus, we have our priorities askew, and many in ministry fall into that trap.
When my availability to others starts to negatively impact my marriage and family life, it is too much! On one of our many vacations to Montana my kids threatened to throw my cell phone in the Gallatin River if I took one more call (yep I was fishing at the time). They were tired of me doing work on our family vacation. Our marriages and our families are our first priority and if we start to compromise them to help others we are in dangerous territory.
When my availability to others takes me away from those key things that God has called me to do, it is too much! I know that God has called me to pay attention to certain priorities in life and ministry. It is easy to allow those things to slide because of the many needs around us but it is also a mistake. Remember, we are not the answer to all of the problems people have. There are others who can help and we have limited time and energy. If my life or ministry priorities are compromised by the time I make myself available to others (which could consume all of my time) I have not put appropriate boundaries around myself.
When my availability to others creates within me a sense of anger or frustration, it is too much! Ironically, when we make ourselves too available because we like to help people we start to become irritated by those very people: not because they are irritating but because we have reached our own emotional limits and we cannot handle giving more time. Whenever I find myself frustrated or angry that I am being imposed on I know that it is my issue and that I need refreshment and rest myself.
Boundaries matter. If you are married and in ministry, ask your spouse how they would answer these four questions. They will be more objective than we will be.
Let's start with the proposition that there are always more needs than we can meet. That means there are limits to our ability to help. Too often, however, the only thing that keeps us from doing more is that we are so exhausted that we cannot. At some point physical or emotional exhaustion kicks in and forces us to back off but that is already an unhealthy place to be. The more we bump up against physical or emotional limits the greater our own risk of being the one in need!
How do we know when too much is too much? All of our circumstances are different but let me suggest four questions that can help us evaluate when we need to back off.
When my availability to others keeps me from getting the rest and refreshment I need or the time with Jesus I need, it is too much! Running on empty is not a healthy place to be for any period of time. Only healthy people can help others and when our own health is in jeopardy we are too available and need to back off. If my ministry for Jesus detracts from my time with Jesus, we have our priorities askew, and many in ministry fall into that trap.
When my availability to others starts to negatively impact my marriage and family life, it is too much! On one of our many vacations to Montana my kids threatened to throw my cell phone in the Gallatin River if I took one more call (yep I was fishing at the time). They were tired of me doing work on our family vacation. Our marriages and our families are our first priority and if we start to compromise them to help others we are in dangerous territory.
When my availability to others takes me away from those key things that God has called me to do, it is too much! I know that God has called me to pay attention to certain priorities in life and ministry. It is easy to allow those things to slide because of the many needs around us but it is also a mistake. Remember, we are not the answer to all of the problems people have. There are others who can help and we have limited time and energy. If my life or ministry priorities are compromised by the time I make myself available to others (which could consume all of my time) I have not put appropriate boundaries around myself.
When my availability to others creates within me a sense of anger or frustration, it is too much! Ironically, when we make ourselves too available because we like to help people we start to become irritated by those very people: not because they are irritating but because we have reached our own emotional limits and we cannot handle giving more time. Whenever I find myself frustrated or angry that I am being imposed on I know that it is my issue and that I need refreshment and rest myself.
Boundaries matter. If you are married and in ministry, ask your spouse how they would answer these four questions. They will be more objective than we will be.
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