I have a dear friend who I had the joy of leading to Christ many years ago. This week I received news that he has been diagnosed with stage four prostate cancer - although treatable. He had gone in for surgery on a disc and in the course of the surgery they discovered a tumor from the unknown cancer. Upon awakening the doctor had to tell him that the rather routine surgery had discovered something really serious. My friend's reply to this surprise was "Well, God was not surprised!"
That response is one that applies to all of the surprises in life and leadership. We may be surprised but God is never surprised. That truth can give us confidence to trust Him for the very things that cause us anxiety and concern. Nothing surprises God and therefore we can be assured that He can help us work through our issues as a sovereign and faithful God.
Think of the largest issues you have faced - or face right now. The news may seem overwhelming as for my friend. Then remember: God was not surprised. In fact, nothing happens in our lives, good or bad, which does not first pass by the hands of God and which He does not use to build our faith. He knows, He cares and He superintends the outcome for His purposes. That ought to give us a quiet settled confidence not matter the situation.
Sunday, August 17, 2014
Saturday, August 16, 2014
A life posture of humility
Scripture has a great deal to say about humility as this trait is deeply valued by God as opposed to a posture of pride. Psalm 131:1 says it well: my heart is not proud, O Lord, my eyes are not haughty. I do not concern myself with great matters, or things too wonderful for me."
Humility is a posture toward God and life. It includes the concept that there are many things we don't know and many things that we cannot know in relation to God who knows all things. Above all it is a posture of trust in God rather than in ourselves.
Psalm 131:2 says, "I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me." Humility is dependence on God, just as a young child is dependent on its mother and trusts his/her mother for one's daily needs.
We often think that the best and brightest are those who know all the answers, are self sufficient, self made and have it all together. God says not! The best and the brightest understand that a posture of humility rather than pride is what God looks for. And that is based on a posture of dependence on God rather than independence from Him.
Our hope is not in ourselves. Our wisdom comes from above. Our provision is a gift of God. As the Psalmist concludes, "put your hope in the Lord both now and forevermore. It is a life posture of humility.
Friday, August 15, 2014
Change is often necessary but the process we use will either create greater unity or dissention
Bringing change is a tricky business. Often the need for change, whether in a church or organization is profound. The world never stops changing and therefore while our eternal truths remain the same, change is inevitable. However, many change processes are deeply flawed and lead to the ministry taking steps back - and conflict rather than the intended result of leading it forward in unity.
I watch this often in churches where a pastor, often new decides that new ways of doing ministry are needed. What they often forget is that those who have been there a long while are used to what is. It is comfortable for them and most people simply don't like change. Here are some of the mistakes I watch in churches and organizations make leaders bring change.
1. They move too quickly. Just because the leader is ready to bring change does not mean their people are. Fast change is usually going to bring conflict, misunderstanding and even deep division within the organization. I have watched congregations literally lose half of their people when quick changes were made.
2. They don't talk and dialogue with their people at length before the change. People have strong opinions and feelings. If one can present a case for change that makes sense, most people will go with you but only if they have been part of the process and understand the end goal. The less dialogue up front, the more resistance there will be. Because that resistance is often an emotional response, it can cause emotional responses that are strong.
3. They don't take into account the various constituencies of the group. Sometimes it is wise to move in new directions without disenfranchising those who are vested in a different paradigm. Examples in the church might be worship styles or a desire to start small groups. Simply chopping out the old and putting in the new when it disenfranchises a significant segment of people is not wise. This is where patience and process is needed to get where you need to go without creating conflict and irritation.
4. They don't admit when significant resistance comes that the execution might be flawed. Sometimes one needs to take a step back before one can make a step forward. If people are balking it probably means that the change has been too fast, that process was not run and that some "compromises" need to be made. One can only move as fast as the organization is willing to follow. Significant resistance is a sign that you may need to evaluate the plan. I am not talking a few loud voices but significant groups.
5. They see resistors as "evil" or "bad" rather than understanding that often this is not the case. This further divides the group into those who support and those who oppose which then fractures relationships. When we categorize people we lose relationship and relationships are keys to major change. This is further complicated when leaders start to discount the opinions of those who resist.
Change is always an art. It is the art of helping people see where we could go and that in order to get there change is needed. But, the five mistakes above can be deadly if they are not taken into account. It is the job of leaders who bring change to ensure that it is done in a timely, wise, relational and healthy way so that the end product is both greater effectiveness and greater unity.
I watch this often in churches where a pastor, often new decides that new ways of doing ministry are needed. What they often forget is that those who have been there a long while are used to what is. It is comfortable for them and most people simply don't like change. Here are some of the mistakes I watch in churches and organizations make leaders bring change.
1. They move too quickly. Just because the leader is ready to bring change does not mean their people are. Fast change is usually going to bring conflict, misunderstanding and even deep division within the organization. I have watched congregations literally lose half of their people when quick changes were made.
2. They don't talk and dialogue with their people at length before the change. People have strong opinions and feelings. If one can present a case for change that makes sense, most people will go with you but only if they have been part of the process and understand the end goal. The less dialogue up front, the more resistance there will be. Because that resistance is often an emotional response, it can cause emotional responses that are strong.
3. They don't take into account the various constituencies of the group. Sometimes it is wise to move in new directions without disenfranchising those who are vested in a different paradigm. Examples in the church might be worship styles or a desire to start small groups. Simply chopping out the old and putting in the new when it disenfranchises a significant segment of people is not wise. This is where patience and process is needed to get where you need to go without creating conflict and irritation.
4. They don't admit when significant resistance comes that the execution might be flawed. Sometimes one needs to take a step back before one can make a step forward. If people are balking it probably means that the change has been too fast, that process was not run and that some "compromises" need to be made. One can only move as fast as the organization is willing to follow. Significant resistance is a sign that you may need to evaluate the plan. I am not talking a few loud voices but significant groups.
5. They see resistors as "evil" or "bad" rather than understanding that often this is not the case. This further divides the group into those who support and those who oppose which then fractures relationships. When we categorize people we lose relationship and relationships are keys to major change. This is further complicated when leaders start to discount the opinions of those who resist.
Change is always an art. It is the art of helping people see where we could go and that in order to get there change is needed. But, the five mistakes above can be deadly if they are not taken into account. It is the job of leaders who bring change to ensure that it is done in a timely, wise, relational and healthy way so that the end product is both greater effectiveness and greater unity.
Thursday, August 14, 2014
Transitioning: How to transition well when it is time for a leader to leave their position
This is a podcast from Leary Gates and guest Roger Thompson on what it means to transition well. Going out at the top of your game!
Wednesday, August 13, 2014
Endless emails and church/staff conflict
It is not unusual when working with a troubled church to read endless emails regarding whatever it is that has created conflict. Even more interesting to me is when there is dysfunction on a church staff and staff members who work in close proximity to one another are exchanging lengthy emails rather than walking down the hall (or to an office next door) to have a conversation.
Email dialogues are rarely helpful for resolving conflict. In fact, I would posit that they actually raise the level of conflict because it is easier to state things in non-negotiable language in an email than it is in person or on the phone. Thus the dialogue often becomes even more strident in email conversations (confrontations). In addition, emails are often written in the heat of the moment lacking the gift of reflection. Even worse, emails can be copied to many others which now widens the potential conflict rather than keeping it between two parties. Word to the wise: never put in an email anything you don't want the world to hear because they may.
Emails do not allow one to sit down face to face and seek clarification, look one in the eye and listen carefully, empathize or challenge points of view in a personal way. I will often receive emails asking for an answer or seeking my perspective and I will reply, "It sounds like this is a conversation, not an email." Then I will schedule a phone call.
People with good emotional intelligence are not afraid of conversations. Often email exchanges are a substitute for a conversation out of fear or an unwillingness to dialogue with someone that we know disagrees with us. Ironically, personal conversations tend to diminish rather than increase the level of conflict. Especially if the two parties are at least willing to listen to each other and seek understanding. Email missives are a cowards way out of a personal conversation where we are more accountable for our words, body language and attitudes.
When there is conflict, walk down the hall, pick up the phone or make a Skype call rather than write down words you cannot retract and which may polarize rather than heal. In fact, this is my practice whenever I hear that there are people who have issues with me. Rather than wonder or make assumptions I pick up the phone and seek to resolve whatever it is that has caused a disruption in the relationship.
In conflict, have a conversation rather than sending an email.
Email dialogues are rarely helpful for resolving conflict. In fact, I would posit that they actually raise the level of conflict because it is easier to state things in non-negotiable language in an email than it is in person or on the phone. Thus the dialogue often becomes even more strident in email conversations (confrontations). In addition, emails are often written in the heat of the moment lacking the gift of reflection. Even worse, emails can be copied to many others which now widens the potential conflict rather than keeping it between two parties. Word to the wise: never put in an email anything you don't want the world to hear because they may.
Emails do not allow one to sit down face to face and seek clarification, look one in the eye and listen carefully, empathize or challenge points of view in a personal way. I will often receive emails asking for an answer or seeking my perspective and I will reply, "It sounds like this is a conversation, not an email." Then I will schedule a phone call.
People with good emotional intelligence are not afraid of conversations. Often email exchanges are a substitute for a conversation out of fear or an unwillingness to dialogue with someone that we know disagrees with us. Ironically, personal conversations tend to diminish rather than increase the level of conflict. Especially if the two parties are at least willing to listen to each other and seek understanding. Email missives are a cowards way out of a personal conversation where we are more accountable for our words, body language and attitudes.
When there is conflict, walk down the hall, pick up the phone or make a Skype call rather than write down words you cannot retract and which may polarize rather than heal. In fact, this is my practice whenever I hear that there are people who have issues with me. Rather than wonder or make assumptions I pick up the phone and seek to resolve whatever it is that has caused a disruption in the relationship.
In conflict, have a conversation rather than sending an email.
Monday, August 11, 2014
We are entering a new Dark Age with ISIS: The face of evil. Warning on graphic images
This is the face of ISIS, perhaps the greatest threat to humanity on our globe today because of the utter inhumanity toward anyone who does not fit their brand of Islam. The genocide and killing reminds me of the second world war whether from Stalin or Hitler except this time there are no world powers seriously seeking to check their progress.
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To ignore the actions ISIS when we know what they are doing is akin to those who ignored the actions of the Nazis in their extermination of the Jews. Some knew and chose not to act. Today those directly threatened are Christians, other minorities and anyone who does not adhere to the barbaric form of Islam represented by these evil individuals. If we think they are not a threat they have managed to take over towns and cities from near Aleppo in Syria to the outskirts of Baghdad in Iraq. They have their sights set on Lebanon and Israel and the United States.
ISIS forces are barbaric. Killing is their specialty. If the evil one came to "kill, steal or destroy, (John 10:10), these are the evil one's children. ISIS is saying to Christians and others, convert or be killed! Kurdish officials are warning of genocide.
This is no longer an Iraqi problem. It is a humanitarian disaster, it is genocide before the eyes of the world and it is a movement that will threaten the entire globe with no regard for human life if not stopped. It is the very face of evil. How can the world watch and not act in the face of this kind of evil - or will we simply watch as the world did in Rwanda until the killing was over and the blood defiled all those who knew but did not act?
See these articles for more information or google ISIS and your heart will be broken. Please be aware of graphic images. You are looking into the face of evil personified!
Reminder. My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.
Saturday, August 9, 2014
A nasty job done well
There are times when leaders, whether boards or senior leaders must tackle what can be fairly be called a nasty job. It may involve dealing with moral failures, financial downturns and the resultant decisions that must be made or moving someone out of an organization. Or perhaps dealing with a recalcitrant board member or individual who is hurting the organization. It is a nasty job because it is delicate, will not be received well, could have significant repercussions and on the surface it looks like there are no great outcomes and significant risks - but it must be done.
No one signs onto leadership for the nasty jobs but they are part of the equation from time to time. It is easy to become discouraged when faced with a messy situation. And not without reason as many messy situations are handled in a messy matter further complicating the picture. But that is not a necessary outcome. It is possible to handle nasty jobs well and in the meantime honor people and protect the organization. Here are some thoughts in dealing with messy or complicated situations.
No one signs onto leadership for the nasty jobs but they are part of the equation from time to time. It is easy to become discouraged when faced with a messy situation. And not without reason as many messy situations are handled in a messy matter further complicating the picture. But that is not a necessary outcome. It is possible to handle nasty jobs well and in the meantime honor people and protect the organization. Here are some thoughts in dealing with messy or complicated situations.
- Never act in haste unless you must. Take the time to ensure that you understand the situation as well as you can. Hasty action is usually a result of our own anxiety and will often have unintended consequences.
- Never act alone. The more messy the situation the more important it is to have multiple counselors. You may also want to find a trusted outside counselor who you trust as they do not have a stake in the situation or outcome.
- Work a process. To the extent that you can, engage in dialogue with the individual who you need to deal with (if it is an individual). When we are anxious we tend to make assumptions, send letters and emails. Try to stay in dialogue and be clear with the individual what you need, don't say things that don't need to be said and keep the circle of those involved as small as possible. You can make the right decision but fail in running a good process. It takes time to get to where you need to go so be patient in the process.
- Make prayer central. It is amazing how sensitivity to the Holy Spirit's counsel can help navigate tough issues. There is power in a groups wisdom when each member of the group is also listening to the Holy Spirit along the way. You may be surprised at the insights He brings to the process.
- To the extent that you can, and depending on the circumstances, treat individuals involved with utmost respect and fairness. In messy situations it is easy to get angry and express that anger but in dealing with it this is rarely helpful.
I have been a party to helping many churches and organizations deal with messy and sometimes nasty jobs. it is a great gift when the end result is one of success because it was handled well. That is always the goal when faced with a nasty job: Can we handle it well!
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