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Friday, May 31, 2013

Marginalization of the elders among us

One of the things that bothers me in the contemporary church is a tendency I see in some quarters to marginalize the generations that are older than us. 

America is a youth culture - it celebrates youth and many congregations have bought into that youth culture at the expense of our older generations who paved the way for us and who often pay the bills for us still today. Besides, what ever happened to all people matter to God? Since when do we not need the white hair generation to pass on some wisdom and experience to the youth of today? 

Now you may be thinking that I am just one of those cranky older folks since I am eligible for AARP (but not a member) at 57. I don't feel marginalized - yet, but I know many who do and I often wonder how those who do it (some pastors) will feel when they reach retirement. What I do know is that I no longer fit the targeted market of many churches. I am just glad Jesus does not have a target market as I might not fit it. Churches often seem to though.

All of God's people have a legacy to fill for as long as they are alive. The moment we marginalize them, pigeon hole them or treat them with a lack of respect and dignity we have lost our way. It is what the Pharisees did with various segments of the population. It is not what Jesus did. 

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3 comments:

Vince Miller said...

I wonder if it is simply due to the trend that in the American church at large the consumer marketing approach, which now seems to be the angle of most churches, precedes the mission for all peoples. I would agree with you TJ that there seems to be loss of attention to this generation when they are one of the higher populations in this country.

I would also add that as someone who myself is of a different generation (gen x), that I have felt this same lack of attention at times. As a growing leader of the gen x era, I have also felt a lack of willingness of older generations to poor down into me and leaders like me. This is not a complaint but simply an awareness that I have seen trending in younger generation who have found it hard to break into upper layers of leadership.

Thanks for stirring up a great topic.

Matt Steen said...

I have been watching this for quite a while, and am deeply concerned by it. I believe wholeheartedly that our generations need one another, but I also believe that our generations can sometimes be too stubborn to admit it. I watch as Millennials write off the Boomers, and Boomers write off Millennials, while all of us Gen Xers tend to be ignored by everyone (kidding!).

From my vantage point, I believe the crux of the problem is this: often times, when I hear boomers talk about "mentoring", "partnering with", and "coming alongside of" younger generations it is code for "I'm going to teach them to do things how I did them."

This may not be a conscious thing, and it may not be intentional, but it is there, and the younger generations pick up on it quickly (and it makes them cringe).

The other thing that I see is an immaturity that says "the older generations screwed this whole thing up, and our generation needs to fix it!" While I believe that only time can fix this, I believe that some of this is the result of some of our popular youth ministry models... but that is a topic for another conversation.

Are you seeing this as well, or am I missing something?

Maryann said...

I believe a lot of the blame lies on those of us who are in the "older" age bracket. When was the last time you volunteered to teach a trade or craft or sport to a young person? When I was a church secretary I would call the seniors for help with something and I often heard "Oh, I can't be bothered with that. I've done my time." In essence they were cutting themselves off from the younger generation. I found the precious ones who would put in to the youth of our church and had them teach a craft or be part of a progressive supper. Some listened to verses in our kids clubs. Our kids learned to appreciate seniors and those seniors felt needed.

Seniors can volunteer in so many areas of church but chose to retire instead. Those of us in our fifties need to buck the freedom fifty-five idea and keep serving. We need to not grow weary in well doing for in due time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.