The art of negotiation and how to ensure that you get what you really need as a leader

Good leaders are highly flexible on most things but very inflexible on a few things.

In fact, it is their flexibility on the majority of issues that makes it possible for them to be inflexible on a few truly important issues. 

Where should we be flexible as leaders? On those issues that are a matter of personal preference! Many decisions are not critical to the success of an organization. They could be decided in a variety of ways and still accomplish what needs to be accomplished. The best leaders don't insist on their way or their preferences in these areas. They save their powder for those few areas where they need to be inflexible. Their flexibility on most things gives them the coinage to be inflexible on a few things.

Where should we be inflexible as leaders? On issues that go to the heart of our mission, our culture, our non-negotiables and our central work. These are not areas of preference but of driving the mission of the organization. If you compromise here you lose effectiveness and momentum. Your organization may even go into free fall. On these things a leader must stand firm. Staff will usually give leaders that privilege when they know that on most things their leader is flexible. The fact that they are inflexible on these few issues tells staff it must be important.

Flexibility on most issues allows leaders to be inflexible on the truly important issues. 

This is part of the art of negotiation over the long haul of leadership. You give up your preferences on the less important things so that you can realize your preferences on the most important things.

Don't confuse the two!

Mentoring: A gift that lasts a life time

One of the most unselfish things we can do is to mentor the next generation of leaders. Our knowledge, wisdom and lessons learned over the years can cut the learning curve significantly for younger emerging leaders. Mentoring is a gift that will resonate through the next generation of leadership. For those who intentionally practice it, mentoring is a major part of our legacy.

Think for a moment of what you wish you had done differently as a young leader. Think of the dumb tax you paid for mistakes and inexperience. Consider the things you wish you had known back then. Now take all of that and help the next generation avoid some of the pitfalls you encountered and shorten their learning curve as a young leader. That is a gift!

Mentors can literally shave years off of the growth curve of younger leaders through their encouragement, coaching, counsel, training and developing. 

It is not only the beneficiary who benefits from this relationship. For the mentor there is a deep sense of satisfaction that you are able to make a significant difference in the life and work of another. It also reminds the mentor of things that are important to them and causes them to think more deeply about the issues they are giving advice on. It keeps the mentor sharp as they think about the issues they are advising on. It also bridges the divide between generations and gives the mentor insight on the generation they are influencing. There is learning on both sides.

Those who choose to mentor are living unselfish lives. After all, life is not all about us. The unselfish individual realizes that helping others is good and right and contributes to a better workplace and a better society. At some point in our lives, our greatest influence is in passing on the wisdom, knowledge, experience and dumb tax that we have accumulated. 

Who are you mentoring?