Boards that are not united and don't face reality

I have recently been watching a church board that is not united and not facing realities within its congregation. Members have been marginalized, issues have been ignored and there has been a slow but steady exodus of key long time members from the church. Notwithstanding the evidence of problems that board has not been willing to deal with substantive issues the church faces. Instead it has presented an "all is well" message to the congregation.

Here is an interesting fact about congregations. They are not stupid. They may not know all the facts but they can sense when something is wrong. But, being gracious and not wanting to hurt the church most will not fight, make a fuss, or try to force change. Nor are they in a position to do so. They are not in leadership and in the end it is the leaders who either choose to deal with problems or not. And their choices have consequences for the church.

What do they do? As they become disillusioned, they simply leave, quietly. And board members and staff whitewash their leaving. There is always a good reason. And who leaves? Usually the very people who have the insight to understand the issues that are not being addressed are the ones who leave. And in many cases they have been ignored when they tried to appropriately address those issues with leaders.

So, the very people that the church needs to move forward are the ones who quietly migrate out of the congregation. I have watched this many times and it is disastrous for the church in the long run.

I wish at every annual meeting, someone would ask the church chair or board chair how united, aligned and healthy the board is - and get a candid answer. Here is something I know from long experience. Divided boards end up dividing a congregation - one way or another. It may be a visible division or as I have mentioned, an invisible one, as insightful people simply migrate out.

No church can be healthy with an unhealthy board! Few congregations will rise above the spiritual health of their leaders. People who sense not all is well and don't see that changing, or who sense powerplays in the church will often simply leave. Unhealthy leaders whitewash issues rather than deal with them. They hope that those issues will not get "out" and they do all they can to keep them "in." But, the wisest among us are not fooled. Nor will they stay indefinitely if they believe that leaders are not dealing with real issues.

What happens is a quiet but real leadership drain from the church. Leaders who do not lead well end up losing the leadership pool in the church. Something to think about.

Signs of healthy and unhealthy boards

How healthy is your board? Do not underestimate the importance of this question if you serve on a board.

The question matters because the health of your board (church or otherwise) will reflect and determine the health of your ministry. Too many boards live with a lack of health and their ministries suffer because of it. If you are a board member, your contribution to health or dishealth of the board you serve on either contributes to overall health or dishealth. Because we are talking about ministry boards, we ultimately answer to the Lord of the Church for our board involvement and stewardship. Board health matters.

Healthy Boards have certain characteristics. They have clarified what is important for the ministry and can clearly articulate its direction. They spend the majority of their time thinking about the future rather than dealing with present day to day management. They learn together, read together and pray together.

On healthy boards, all board members represent the whole of the ministry and engage in honest, respectful, robust dialogue. On a healthy board there are NO ELEPHANTS that cannot be discussed. To the extent that there are issues that one cannot address directly the board is not healthy. Nor do healthy boards ignore real issues in the ministry whether they involve a board member, a ministry program, or the ministry leader. To the extent that there are real issues that cannot or are not discussed, the board is unhealthy.

Healthy boards are unified. That does not mean they always agree but they can work together agreeably and are "in the game" together. They want the best for the church or ministry and will pull together to get there. In this regard, they also care about ministry results. Because they are clear on ministry direction, they are able to measure ministry results. They give staff freedom within clear parameters but they also hold them accountable for measurable results.

Unhealthy boards have a predictable set of practices. They are often unified, focus on management rather than the future, micromanage, allow elephants to exist, do not engage in honest dialogue, allow factions to develop on the board, don't clarify ministry or the future and don't hold staff accountable for ministry results. One of the results of conflict on an unhealthy board is often conflict within the congregation.

The first step toward health is knowing how healthy your board is. The following board self analysis will give you a clue. It is from the book High Impact Church Boards. Remember, the health of your board matters.

1. Are you ever frustrated by the pace of decision-making?
Yes No

2. Is it necessary to get the approval of more than one group
in order to get something done?
Yes No

3. Do you find your board revisiting issues that you thought
you had settled already?
Yes No

4. Is there confusion or conflict over what place the congregation,
staff team or board plays in leadership or decision-making?
Yes No

5. Does your board have a clear job description and understand
its responsibilities?
Yes No

6. Do you find that you spend more time “managing” day-today
activities than thinking and planning for the future?
Yes No

7. Could you identify the clear “preferred future” for your
congregation, and is this a shared dream of the board?
Yes No

8. Do your board and staff members have clear annual ministry
goals and plans?
Yes No

9. Are you frustrated with the number of decisions that need
to go to the congregation for approval?
Yes No

10. Is there a high level of unity and relational health among
board members?
Yes No

11. Do your church structure and bylaws hinder rather than
help leaders make timely decisions?
Yes No

12. Does your board have ample time for prayer and study of
Scripture, and to dream and plan for the future?
Yes No

13. Does your board have a covenant that spells out its procedural
and relational practices?
Yes No

14. Has the lack of such a covenant ever caused problems for
the board?
Yes No

15. Do you have a process designed to find the very best leaders
for your senior board?
Yes No

16. Do you have a process to mentor and train potential leaders
before they become leaders?
Yes No

17. Do you believe that your church is maximizing its ministry
impact?
Yes No

18. Does your congregation have more than one elected board?
Yes No

19. Is there tension or confusion between the staff and board
over who is responsible for what?
Yes No

20. Are you able to attract and retain the best leaders in your
church to serve on your senior leadership board?
Yes No

How many yes answers do you have? _____. A perfect score
would be a yes for questions 5, 7, 8, 10, 12, 13, 15, 16, 17, 20

How many no answers do you have? _____. A perfect score
would be a no for questions 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, 11, 14, 18, 19

Take a moment and find out how each member of your board
answered these questions, and discuss the results together. The
resulting conversation will help you identify issues in your
church leadership paradigm that need to be changed—if you
are going to maximize your congregation’s ministry impact.

Bold and Bolder Faith

In Luke 11, Jesus taught his disciples how to pray with the Lord’s prayer. If you read that prayer it is a bold prayer with bold requests. But then Jesus goes on to expand his teaching on prayer:

“Then he said to them, Suppose one of you has a friend, and he goes to him at midnight and says, Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, because a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him.

Then the one inside answers, Don’t bother me. The door is already locked, and my children are with me in bed. I can’t get up and give you anything. I tell you, though he will not get up and give him the bread because he is his friend, yet because of the man’s boldness he will get up and give him as much as he needs.

So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” (Luke 11:5-13)

Jesus is inviting us to be bold in our requests! He is inviting us to make BIG asks. He is affirming that when we pray God hears and doors open. He is making the point that just as we would not be stingy with responding to the requests of our own children that he would never be stingy with us His children.

Here is why I think so many people were profoundly impacted by the story of my illness. We often pray, not believing that God would actually do something BIG, or that we could make truly bold requests. That God can and does the miraculous in our day. But He did, and they saw it and it changed their understanding of prayer, faith, and God’s ability to do BIG things.

Because Mary Ann had heard from God early on that “it will be close but He will make it,” she would not let anyone into my ICU room to pray for me who would not pray for an absolute miracle and total healing. That was a bold move because there was no medical indication that I would pull through. Or, realistic hope.

If Jesus invites bold faith, if He invites BIG asks, we ought to take Him up on His offer. What is it that you need today? Be bold, pray BIG and wait for a loving father to answer!

It can be hard to be bold in our prayer or to do BIG asks if we are not used to doing this. There is another hard part of prayer. We are to pray bold and pray BIG but we are also to pray for God’s will to be done (Matthew 6:10). That is hard because while God always answers the prayer of faith (Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you – Luke 11:9-10) His perfect answer is not always our perfect answer!

God chose to heal me – twice - in His sovereignty. He does not always do that. That does not mitigate bold and BIG prayer. It requires that we understand that God’s perfect will is sometimes unseen by us. Even Jesus, on the eve of His arrest and death, prayed “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done. An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him. And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground” (Luke 22:42-44).

Let that sink in. Jesus was in agony over what was before Him. He pled with his Father to remove the cup of suffering from Him but even as He prayed boldly and with a BIG ask, in the same breath he said “yet not my will but yours be done.” Did God show up? Yes, an angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened Him. Did God remove the path of suffering from Him. No!

A pastor friend of mine was exhilarated when God chose to heal me. He and his congregation had prayed hard, earnestly, boldly and BIG. He was devastated a few months later when God did not heal a young boy in his church who experienced a devastating accident at a youth retreat. This is a man of great faith and has been a model of prayer for me through the years. He was as devastated by God’s seeming lack of action as he was in God’s miraculous action in my life.

Reflecting on that event recently he said, “It is amazing how powerful prayer is when we pray in line with God’s will.” Ultimately, life is not about us but about God. Ultimately, God’s purposes are far greater than we can ever comprehend this side of heaven. If Jesus was bound by His Father’s will and willing to submit to that will, why would we, his followers and children, be exempt?

In this regard, one of the most misused verses in Scripture is Romans 8:28. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purposes.”

Many assume that means that only good things happen to God’s people. Yet just a few verses later Paul asks “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered. No in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us” (Romans 8:35-37).

Far from denying the reality of bad things, Paul says expect them. But know that even in the worst, nothing can separate us from God’s love. In that context we have to take Romans 8:28 that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him” from God’s perspective not ours. It is not a promise that life will not include pain. It is rather a promise that when it does, God has a purpose and a plan that is still good and perfect and that he can use even our pain for His greater purposes.

God does not always remove suffering from our lives – and He did not for Jesus but He does redeem that suffering for greater divine purposes. Bold prayer, prayer that storms the gates of heaven is unapologetic in its requests and BIG in its scope. But it is not bold without praying for God’s ultimate will to be done. That is the boldest prayer because that prayer invites God to do what is ultimately best from His perspective, not ours. It is like the prayer of Jesus in the garden a prayer of deep submission to His perfect will and an invitation to Him to use our lives for His deepest and greatest purposes. That is BOLD prayer. And BOLD faith.

Are you willing to pray boldly for His will to be done? Do you trust His goodness enough to pray that way? I want to invite you to take that step of ultimate faith and trust right now. Tell Him your need, pray BIG, pray boldly, and boldly invite Him to do His will in your life and situation.

Mentoring Revisited

Yesterday I had an interesting email from the editor of our denominational magazine, EFCA Today of which I am the Executive Editor. She has been trying to elicit responses from churches regarding mentoring. Many women have responded. Few men have responded and one said, "I don't think pastors see it as their job to mentor."

That sentence caught my attention. I am thinking WOW! How can any leader not think it is their job to mentor? To be a leader and not be mentoring other leaders is an oxymoron. It is no wonder that the leadership quotient in so many churches is so low.

His other comment was that pastors did not think they had time to mentor. I don't buy that. We all have time for what is truly important to us. At any one time I am mentoring ten individuals on a regular basis.

Mentoring is one of the most strategic uses of our time - and - it is one of the most unselfish things we can do. It is giving away what God has given us in the spirit of 2 Timothy 2:2. Every church is one generation away from decline. Raising up the next generation of leaders is the only way we avoid that. And that is not simply preaching. It is influencing key people one on one.

There is another factor for anyone who wants to leave a significant legacy. I am convinced that the most powerful legacy we will ever leave are those individuals who we have raised up and equipped who in effect keep the ripples of our lives moving out on the pond of life. Real leaders give away what they have received.

I give kudos to the women of our churches who get this and do this. I am concerned if the comments above reflect reality for our pastoral leaders.

Who are you pouring your life into on a regular basis helping them become all they can be in line with how God made them?

Building your leadership bench

It is a common refrain: We don't have enough leaders for the ministries we have - or for the leadership board. Most churches do have the leaders they need but they have not been equipped or envisioned to lead.

The default for most churches is that we try to train leaders "on the job" rather than preparing them ahead of time. This default mode is dangerous in that one is putting untrained leaders in critical spots. It does not work well with boards in particular.

A simple solution is to develop a group of potential leaders that you meet with monthly. During those monthly meetings you can read and discuss leadership books, talk about the ministry philosophy of the church, train in church leadership, challenge them to be growing in their spiritual life and envisioning them for leadership or ministry in the local church.

You will quickly discern who your best potential leaders are and you will be growing them before they get into key roles. It is a simple but very strategic move.

Suffering and Humility

Suffering helps to free us from the pride that enslaves us and grows a humility like nothing else can.

Pride is both a mask of pretence and a spirit of the heart. As a mask, it is pretending that we are something we are not, know more than we do, are more competent than we are.

As a spirit of the heart it is believing that we are self sufficient in ourselves and are better than we are. Both the mask and the heart posture are sinful. And they hold us hostage because we must keep up a pretence and don’t allow us to see ourselves for who we really are.

Suffering has a wonderful way of stripping away pride. When life comes undone we can’t pretend we are sufficient anymore. We are forced to acknowledge our need for God and for others. Our weakness becomes our strength.

The Apostle Paul also had to learn humility the hard way.

“To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassing great revelations, there was given to me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:7-10).

We are strong when we humbly rely on God for his grace and power. We are weak when we rely on ourselves. Suffering frees us from self reliance and makes us strong through Christ. No longer do we need to pretend we are sufficient. No longer do we have to pretend we are something we are not. We can just be who we are in our strengths and weaknesses, humbly relying on God.

Having had two long bouts in the ICU I can say with candor that if you were not humble on the way in, one certainly is on the way out! There is no dignity in being sick, in having tubes sticking into your body, in having no control over bodily functions, or the dubious gowns that one tries to keep oneself covered with and in being totally out of control and at the mercy of others. Illness reveals the fragility of our bodies – as does old age, when our bodies slowly betray us and the “clay pots” the Apostle Paul calls our earthly bodies cracks and crumbles.

It was humbling to go to Physical Therapy after my first long hospital stay and to learn how to walk and balance again after 36 days in bed. Or Occupational Therapy where they wanted me to count money and take timed tests of motor function – I failed miserably. Or Speech Therapy where they tested my cognitive skills and memory (flunked there as well). I still have days of “brain fog” where the neurons don’t seem to connect very well.

I have a saying that means much to me: Nothing to prove, nothing to lose. That is how I want to live life. God made me who I am, he wired me the way He did, He has given me a special work to do for Him. I don’t have to prove that I am anything other than who He made me to be and if I have nothing to prove, I have nothing to lose when I fail or don’t live up to someone’s expectations.

That is freedom! Ironically, when I started to wake up from my coma at United Hospital, I kept saying “Nothing to prove, nothing to lose.” It was if I knew that if there was ever a time to practice that mantra it was then, when I was at my weakest.

This is the route to personal authenticity – a commodity in short supply in today’s world, even among Christ-followers. Pretence is a lie. It is also hard to keep up. Authenticity is honesty about who we are and what we struggle with and the challenges we face. Others are drawn to authenticity because it is real and many people are not very real. Authenticity also leads to a new way of thinking about who we need to please.

I have hit a wall! Help

Your ministry has grown and you are tired. You are no longer feeling the joy and enthusiasm you once did. You are peddling faster but still cannot keep up. The way you have done leadership does not seem to be working anymore.

If these apply to you and your situation and you feel like you have hit a wall understand that this is normal! It is not about you, it is about experiencing growth that has made the way you have done leadership as an organization outmoded. It is a symptom of a need for change that will allow you to breath again and help take your ministry to the next level.

At predictable levels of growth, walls are hit and one will keep hitting one's head against that wall until modifications are made to leadership. Hitting a wall simply means that you need to make some transitions.

Typically this will mean that as a leader you will need to refocus your work around a smaller number of focused areas. To put it another way, if you have been flying at ten thousand feet, you need to go to 20,000 feet and let someone else take over what you did at 10,000 feet. There will be a sense of loss but refocusing your work is critical to breaking through the wall.

This will mean helping your staff refocus their efforts as well so that some of what you used to do is done by others. They in turn will need to give some things away so that they can refocus their efforts as well.

Often decision making structures will need to be refined. Boards will often need to give staff the authority for day to day decisions so that they can focus on the overall ministry and looking toward the future. Staff configurations will often need to change with a smaller lead team at the top.

If you have hit a wall I have two suggestions. First talk to a leader who has worked through the transition you need to make and find a coach to help you rethink how you are leading and what your priorities are. Second, consider reading Leading From the Sandbox which deals with these kinds of transitions.

Whatever you do, don't assume that your situation is unique. It is not. Everyone in leadership faces these transitions if your ministry is growing. Be encouraged, you can get beyond the wall.