For those who have experienced failure

Failure comes in many forms but one of its realities is that in its aftermath, those around us often define us by that failure - some forever. That often contributes to those who have experienced failure to also see themselves as defined by their past. After all, that is how others see them. 

What is particularly interesting is that this often happens among Christians who would be the first to proclaim that we worship a God of Grace. We sing about Grace and mercy in our worship services and then consign some of those around us to an attitude that does not reflect either grace or mercy. Unlike Jesus who lifts people out of their ditch and encourages them to move on, our attitudes can actually keep people in the ditch and discourage them from moving on. And I suspect that there will be some readers who think that is a good thing for those who have failed.

Here is an insightful statement for those who have experienced failure.

"If you have people who want to live in your history, let them; but don't for a minute think you have to live there with them. You cannot move into your destiny if you don't let go of your history. Surround yourself with people who define you by your purpose rather than your past."

One cannot fight what others think of them. Some will always see you through the lens of your history. But you don't need to live in your history nor does God want you to! He wants you to live in your purpose and in freedom. And there are people who will define you by your purpose. Those are the people you need to bring around you. 

With a repentant heart and the help of God, David moved on from his failure and was called a man after God's own heart. Moses was able to move on from his failure with time and God's encouragement and was called the most humble man who ever lived - a far cry from the arrogance of his youth. Paul said it well in Philippians 3:13-14, "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

God does not want us to live in our past. He came to redeem us from our past failures. He calls us to live in His grace and freedom. Others may not want you to live there but He does so let those who want to live in your history do so. But you...move on into a new history through the grace and mercy of Jesus who came for that very purpose.

Creating cultures of organizational excellence
AddingtonConsulting.org

Thankfulness as a habit and attitude

2018 is past. Have you stopped to consider what you are thankful for in this past year? It is a worthwhile exercise to write down the people you are thankful for, the answers to prayer you experienced and the blessings of God that you received. In my experience, the healthiest people I know are also those who are most thankful.

Why? Because they dwell on the positive rather than the negative aspects of life which changes one's whole attitude. Because they appreciate the people around them who bless them. Because they are conscious of and appreciative of God's blessings on their lives. Rather than wishing they had more or different, they are thankful for what they have. Even in the hard things, they look at what they have learned and the small blessings along the way and are thankful for them. 

Amy Morin, a psychotherapist and mental health author wrote an article in Forbes Magazine titled 7 Scientifically Proven Benefits of Gratitude that Will Motivate You to Give Thanks Year-Round. They included the following:

1. Gratitude opens the door to more relationships
2. Gratitude improves physical health
3. Gratitude improves psychological health
4. Gratitude increases empathy and reduces aggression
5. Grateful people sleep better
6. Gratitude improves self-esteem
7. Gratitude increases mental strength

The bottom line is that gratitude impacts all of our lives so it makes sense to focus on being a person of thanksgiving. Being thankful to God, to people, and for the smallest of blessings rather than dwelling on the negative is both Biblical and psychological advice. Bringing thankful people on our staff also changes the morale of our staff and teams. Unthankful people spread a Scrooge like attitude while thankful people spread good cheer.

An attitude of gratitude is especially important for leaders as their attitude sets the culture of the company, ministry or team. Thankful leaders are healthier leaders.

Are you living a thankful life today?

Creating cultures of organizational excellence
AddingtonConsulting.org

Book Matters. Imperial Twilight: The Opium War and the end of China's Last Golden Age

Every once in a while a book of history has significant relevance today. For those who have had interactions with China or who are watching the current trade wars this book by Stephen R. Platt is a must read. The book chronicles the attempt by the west to force the Chinese to open their borders to greater trade (including opium) and the various strategies that were used to convince China to comply. 

The end of the Opium War (which was about much more than opium) saw the Chinese cede the Island of Hong Kong to the British along with 12 square miles of the mainland, later supplemented by a 100 year lease of the New Territories. This was my home during my childhood and I had the experience of visiting the residual opium dens still open in the 60's. No I did not inhale - I promise. 

While the events of the book take place in the 1700's and 1800's the essential style of leadership in China related to outsiders doing trade with the same is amazingly similar. In addition, the inability of the West to understand or attempt to understand the Chinese psychology during this period reminds me very much of the attempts of the United States to convince the Chinese to modify certain practices today. 

China is not easily convinced to change their practices and neither force or public shaming have been helpful in that regard. The west is doing both today and China is doing what it has always done in taking the long view and biding their time. A reading of this book indicates that not much has changed in this regard. 

Equally compelling for any business people or missionaries who are going to work cross culturally are the lessons that can be learned from this account of the necessity to understand one's host culture, its way of thinking and its practices based on their historical values. 

The west was wildly incompetent in this regard, not only in their way of relating to the Chinese but in their total disregard of what mattered to China. They were the west after all and knew what to do! In fact, China knew a great deal more about the west than the west knew about China and that is true today as well. Cultural intelligence has not been the west's strong suit in understanding Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran, Syria or China. Reading this volume reminds me that the west makes many of the same mistakes today that we did two and three hundred years ago.

If I taught cross cultural studies I would make this required reading for the class. We can learn much from history and particularly from this volume. I give this five stars for the historical account and its relevance for today. 

Creating cultures of organizational excellence
AddingtonConsulting.org