Want to know how your staff is doing? Try asking these questions

I meet a lot of ministry staff who feel disempowered in their jobs. Often, those above them don't know what those issues are that bring down the happiness factor of their team because they don't ask the important questions that would uncover issues and make the workplace happier and more effective. Try asking these questions of your staff in a safe (maybe anonymous way). What you are looking for are themes. 

Is your assignment clear?

Are you empowered to do your job?

Do you have what you need to do your job well?

Does your supervisor coach and help you or micromanage and control you? Explain.

Does your supervisor give you helpful feedback on a regular basis?

If there was one thing that you wish were different and that would allow you to do your job better, what would it be?

What practices in your work environment disempower and discourage you?

Are you regularly encouraged to grow and learn? 

Do you have to ask permission to do things that you feel you should not need permission to do?

Is there anyone in your group who causes regular negative issues for others? If so, explain.

What do you think those above you need to know about your work environment?

If you were in charge what would you do differently?

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Seven things to understand about church conflict

Anyone who is in church leadership for very long, either as staff or board members will experience church conflict. Unfortunately the unity Jesus prayed for in John 17 and which Paul asked for in Ephesians 4 is often missing in the church. We live in a fallen world and fallen people have a hard time getting along. 

As a veteran of helping churches negotiate through and out of conflict there are seven things that one needs to keep in mind when it happens.

First, the presenting issues are very often not the real issues. This may be counter-intuitive but it is true. Often in trying to negotiate conflict staff and  boards take what is said by an opposing side as the truth. Often, the real issues are hidden behind the presenting issues and one should not assume that the presenting issues are the real issues. It can take a skilled individual to ferret out what the real issues are an until one can identify what the actual concerns are it is not possible to resolve the conflict.

Second, some involved have no first hand knowledge of what the real issues are but have taken up the offense of others.Often, friends and relatives of those who are unhappy will be caught up in conflict even though it is not their issue and sometimes without even knowing what the underlying issues are. This is one of the things that makes church conflict so confusing. Some people are just caught up on either side because they identify with other people but don't really have a stake in the issues.

Third, truth often becomes a victim of emotion. In the midst of church conflict a lot of words are written and spoken that are often not accurate but they are taken as truth. One person says something which gets repeated as truth when in truth it is not at all true. Emotions are stronger than rational thinking in many instances and those emotions often get in the way of truth. It is sad. When I was the target of disgruntled people many years ago, much of what they said was blatantly false. But in the heat of emotion, it was taken by their friends as truth.

Fourth, some individuals are unable to modify their positions even in the face of irrefutable evidence. This is the result of emotions taking precedence over truth. Once a position is taken in the heat of emotion many individuals are not able or willing to modify that position even when presented with evidence to the contrary. This is one of the reasons that conflict cannot always be resolved in a win/win scenario. When entrenched opinions and emotions do not allow individuals to respond to evidence to the contrary there is little hope of those individuals ever seeing the situation differently than they do.

Fifth, it is not always possible to satisfy everyone. This goes back to what I have already said. This side of heaven some conflicts will not get resolved either because two sides are so far apart, or because logic is lost in emotion or because individuals who have become entrenched in a position are unwilling to move. Sometimes in order to resolve conflict individuals need to say they are either sorry or were wrong. Some will never go there.

Sixth, the longer the conflict remains unresolved the more that truth gets lost. Conflict thrives on rumor, assumptions about motives, emotional triangles and the demonization of those who we disagree with. The longer the conflict remains unresolved, that these poisonous issues flourish and the messier it gets to clean up. Sometimes after a long period of conflict the two sides don't even know what started it all. All they know is that they no longer like each other or want to work with each other.

Seven, conflict flourishes in darkness but not in the light of day. One thing I have learned about conflict is that once brought into the light so that everyone in the congregation is informed of what is going on, things become resolved far faster than when the issues are kept in the back room. We are often fearful of just telling God's people what is going on and what the positions are. Yet, the sooner that is done the less harm comes to the body as a whole. If we believe that each individual has the Holy Spirit within them, we then need to trust that if the congregation knows what is going on they will make decisions that are best for the body as a whole. I always suggest transparency over secretiveness.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

If it doesn't stick it's not vision - the six descriptors of good vision

Vision is what we ask God for in faith as opposed to mission which answers the question of why we exist. There are six descriptors of good vision.

First, it is a God sized ask. If we can accomplish it by ourselves it is not vision. Vision requires God's direct involvement and requires faith.

Second, it engenders enthusiasm. It resonates with those in our ministry to pray for and work toward a goal that we can all get excited about.

Third, it is simple and clear. It does not require a lot of explanation and can be instantly understood. Complicated vision is not vision because it will not stick.

Fourth, it does not need to be fully quantifiable. Remember, it is a big, faith ask. One should be able to show examples of that vision being accomplished but it need not be about counting and keeping score.

Fifth, it mobilizes people in a common direction. That is what vision does. Good vision encourages people toward common God sized goals.

Sixth, it sticks. If you share "vision" and it does not stick it's not vision.

In ReachGlobal we are praying that God would raise up one million disciplemakers to allow us to impact 100 million people with the Gospel and see 100 Acts 19 locations where the Gospel penetrates whole cities or regions rather than just a neighborhood.

That is our vision. What is yours?

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Why it's so easy for leaders to fake it - from Francis Chan

Francis Chan: Why It's So 

Easy for Leaders to Fake It

If you are serious about authentic leadership, my book Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership is now available for pre-order on Amazon. It directly addresses the issues Francis Chan talks about.

When pastors fail at this they severely jeopardize their ministry

One of the most dangerous things a pastor can do is to ignore their staff, mistreat them or allow for a less than healthy culture to develop at the staff level. One may get away with this for a period of time but ultimately it will often destroy everything that one has worked hard to build.

On one end of the spectrum are those pastors who simply take their staff for granted and do not intentionally pastor their own pastors. Staff notice when their leader pays attention to others but not to them and it is disempowering and discouraging. Further, it is dangerous to the senior leader because when push comes to shove it is staff who are closely connected to their leader who will support that leader. The more distant the relationship is the less likely it is that staff will stand by their leader when he really needs them.

Then there are leaders (and I have met my share of them) who either mistreat staff or allow toxic cultures to develop at the staff level. I have worked with churches where the senior pastor verbally mistreated staff, allowed their anger to erupt regularly, regularly interfered with staff responsibilities, fired staff without due process or good cause, marginalized those who disagreed with them and even got rid of staff whose (orthodox) theology did not agree with their own theological proclivities. 

And in case one were to think that this only happens in small churches, it does not. One can have churches in the thousands and still this happens at the staff level.

Obviously the behaviors I identified above are dysfunctional but unfortunately they are not rare. What often intrigues me is how long this dysfunctionality can be hidden from the congregation, which it often is as staff are reluctant to share their issues with the congregation at large - generally a good thing. 

However, there usually comes a breaking point where the dysfunction on staff does spill over to the congregation and when it does it can be very ugly. Because I often get called in the aftermath of such spillage I can attest to the pain it causes staff members and congregants. Often, the senior leaders involved lose their ministry in that church but unfortunately often go on to repeat the behaviors in another church and with another staff.

I have several suggestions for church leaders and senior pastors. First, if you are a senior pastor the most important responsibility you have is to ensure that you have a healthy board and healthy staff because you cannot have a healthy church without health at these two levels. That means that these two groups become one of your highest priorities. Talk of transformation is cheap if there is not transformation at these two levels.

Second, church leaders should have a way to monitor the health of the staff team. Whenever I have had to help clean up messes left by senior leaders the board should have known the issues but either chose not to pay attention to them or simply took the word of their senior leader that all was well. Trust but verify!

Third, if there is significant dysfunction at the staff level, get help for your staff and your senior leader. For the senior leader it may be coaching or training in the building of healthy and aligned teams. For the staff it will mean that you listen and help them move toward health. If you cannot do so with your senior leader then that must be addressed because you cannot have a healthy church without a healthy staff.

There is no greater irony than to talk of transformation when the core leaders of the church, your staff live in toxicity. It is wrong and it will eventually jeopardize the health of the church and the ability of the senior pastor to lead. Don't allow it to happen and if it is, deal with it seriously. The current implosion at Mars Hill in Seattle is a significant lesson in ignoring an unhealthy staff culture. No one gets a free pass on this issue!

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Intervarsity derecognized in California State Universities

Intervarsity Now "Derecognized" in California State Universities

Are evangelicals no longer welcome in the public arena? |

Ed Stetzer

Bibliotheca: A Bible I am excited about

Here is a Bible I am excited about and have ordered. Check it out for yourself

Bibliotheca

My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

The media and Christian ministries

I have watched with sadness the travails of a large church and famous pastor over the past year or so. It has been my desire that they would get their act together for the sake of the church as a whole. One of the interesting facets of the saga has been the charge that the media has been used to create undo attention to the charges against the senior pastor and that dirty laundry should not be aired in the secular media. Even I was chastised for suggesting on Facebook that I wished the parties involved would get their act together as indicated above.

We live in a connected world. This is not necessarily a bad thing. Perhaps what it does is increase our responsibility to handle issues within the church and in Christian organizations in ways that actually honor Jesus and don't need to be hidden from the world. If we have to hide our issues from the world there is either something wrong with our conduct or the way we handle conflict or differences together. 

Further, why should ministries be exempt from the same transparency that we ask of other institutions in society whether government or other entities? If we have something to hide, if we engage in questionable practices, if we mistreat staff or muzzle opinions, is it wrong that we not be held accountable? We love the media when it helps us and use it for our purposes when we can. Is it a surprise that the media not pay attention when we allow our issues to become public as they have in the church above?

Paul suggested that our conduct be such that even the pagan world would look at us and not have cause to accuse us of any wrongdoing. If that were our standard we would not be afraid of scrutiny from the outside or the inside. My take.

Finally, when we allow our leaders to become public figures and treat them like rock stars - or draw attention to our ministries why would we expect anything other than media attention? 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Weather vane leaders

There are unfortunately too many of them: leaders whose direction is determined by which way the wind is blowing rather than from an internal conviction. It is a posture of fear (I don't want to go where others are not going) and of perceived popularity (If I go where others are going I will be considered a good leader). Whatever the motivation, both are deeply harmful and confusing to the organization and staff.

Many church leaders are weather vanes. They seek to perceive where the people are and then advocate for that position. Of course this ignores the fact that most people will opt for the comfortable rather than the missional. The word for church leaders is often Shepherd. Shepherds don't follow the flock, they lead the flock. If all you do is follow the flock of sheep you will wander forever without a destination - the fate of many churches.

Weather vane leaders lead out of insecurity rather than personal conviction. This creates chaos for staff as the direction can change without waning. Those changes of direction can also be caused by leaders who chase the latest trend or strategy in the ministry world. It all adds up to confusion and unstable leadership.

We often confuse representative government with church leadership. Now certainly church leaders cannot move in directions that people will not follow. The definition of a leader is that they have people following. However, church leaders are tasked with helping their people move in directions that will fulfill God's plan for the church rather than our plans or our comfort zones. This is not always the popular direction and it is usually not the comfortable direction. Weather vane leaders are unable to do the hard or uncomfortable thing even when it is in the best interests of their people.

Reminder. My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

Four kinds of people that are helpful in meetings

Think about meetings that are highly effective. They probably have four kinds of people in them which make for robust dialogue, getting to solutions, clarifying issues and developing strategy. Here are four kinds of people that it is helpful to have in a productive meeting.

The Clarifier. 
Much of what is discussed in senior meetings is complex. The individual with a clarity gift is able to quickly synthesize the question at hand as well as potential solutions. They simplify complexity and clarify issues and solutions. Having a member with the gift of clarity can push through confusion and save significant meeting time.

The Questioner.
This individual asks a lot of questions. Not obnoxiously but they do so to get to the heart of the issue and ensure that everyone understands the nature of the issues under discussion. They may also ask contrarian questions - questioning conventional wisdom that is always conventional and often not wisdom.

The Processor.
This is the individual who has the ability to develop processes for potential solutions. It is one thing to know what you want to do, it is a different thing to know how to go about it. Those with the gift of process help the group quickly identify the necessary steps toward implementation.

The Strategist.
This individual has the gift of developing an overall strategy to achieve a certain goal. This is the gift of taking complexity and developing a workable strategy. This is the macro level plan while the processor helps develop the micro level process.

Meetings that seem to go nowhere, circle back to the same issues repeatedly, have trouble coming to decisions and are generally ineffective are probably lacking these four individuals necessary to move forward.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Ebola update

Ebola has struck fear in the hearts of many in Africa leaving many victims helpless. But like the early church when outbreaks of the plague came, it is Christians who are often the ones caring for the sick, ministering to the families of those impacted and burying the dead. This includes partners of ReachGlobal and members of ReachAfrica who minister in Ebola infected regions.

As you hear Ebola updates I would encourage you to pray first that a treatment would be found, for the sick who are struggling for their lives and for the believers and medical staff who are faithfully ministering to the sick. Pray also for a receptiveness to the gospel by those being ministered to. Nothing happens in our world, good or bad, that does not first pass by the hand of God and which He does not use to build His church.

The following video update is instructive on the challenges of dealing with Ebola.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Deep Influence is now available for pre-ordering on Amazon

My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices that will Revolutionize Your Leadership, published by NavPress is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

Too much attention is paid to leadership techniques and far too little to the kind of heart and mind from which the best leadership emanates. The path to truly influential leadership is found in the discipline of practices hidden from the public eye that deeply inform our public leadership. Our convictions, our call, our understanding of ourselves and heart commitments are where it all begins. Character, courage, wisdom, integrity, humility, spiritual depth, endurance, perseverance, kindness, and vision all come from a place deep inside our hearts and souls—the hidden interior and recesses of our lives, whose channels lead to deep veins of God’s work and molding.

From Chapter One of Deep Influence

"I've been a fan of TJ Addington for a long time.  I'm a wiser and better leader because of his writings. But Deep Influence is his most important contribution yet. Every young leader will gain decades of leadership wisdom forged in the painful trenches of reality. Veteran leaders will be inspired to finish strong."

Gene Appel, Senior Pastor

Eastside Christian Church

Anaheim, CA

"We get formed from the outside-in,  but we lead from the inside-out.  Tim Addington explains this process with clarity and conviction.  In a age of superficiality, he'll will guide you to the deeper places of influence and change."

John Ortberg, Senior Pastor

Menlo Park Presbyterian Church

Menlo Park, CA

“My friend T.J. Addington is a wise leadership guru and Deep Influence is his profoundest book on the subject! A seasoned reflective-practitioner, TJ masterfully tackles the most challenging terrain of leadership – the inner life of the leader – along with the empowering practices he or she must cultivate. Few books effectively deal with leadership from the inside out. This is one of the best!”

Edmund Chan

Leadership Mentor, Covenant EFC

Founder, Global Alliance of Intentional Disciplemaking Churches

"Deep Influence draws an effective map for exploring the inner life so often neglected by today’s image conscious leader. TJ’s emphasis on personal integrity, authenticity and emotional intelligence offers a healthy antidote to the toxic influence of every leader’s shadow side. His practical, personal counsel encourages, challenges and inspires every leader to pursue the slower, more intentional, inside-out path to deeper, lasting impact in ministry." 

Russ Kinkade, Psy.D., Psychologist, Executive VP Shepherds Ministries

"If you are not yet convinced that the most difficult challenge you will face as a leader is in “self-leadership,” then read Deep Influence. My dear friend, T.J. Addington sharpened his ministry leadership out of the depths of life-experience even God granted and grew him into a major leadership role for the global church. Deepened by a vital spiritual relationship with God, he enriches fellow-leaders with practical wisdom towards deep influence for God’s purposes."

Ramesh Richard Th.D., Ph.D.,

President, RREACH/Professor, Dallas Seminary

Founder, Trainers of Pastors International 

"Deep Influence, every chapter, was a deep dive into my motives, methods, mind, mission calling, leadership style and relationships which brought me to a place of unexpected unconventional light, revealing a clear fresh exciting perspective to press forward. T.J. humbly said it well, “Depth matters” as he carefully and biblically aimed at my life through the person of Jesus Christ and hit my inner target - the sanctum of my heart.  This book is a transparent transformational leadership mirror which leads to intentional joy and freedom, where Ephesians 2:10 came alive - in me - and it will in you."

Doug Fagerstrom, D.Min, Senior Vice President of Converge and author of The Ministry Staff Member (Zondervan) and The Volunteer (BMH) 

This characteristic is a sign of those closely connected to Jesus

It is joy! One only has to check the use of words like joy, gladness and thanksgiving to realize that this is a mark of one close to Christ. It is an inner delight, satisfaction and happiness that is centered on our relationship with Jesus. In His High Priestly prayer in John 17:13, Jesus says this: “I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them." Joy is also one of the fruits of the Spirit!

This is not a joy based on circumstances in our lives which change regularly. Rather it is a joy based on relationship with Jesus and the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. It is an ongoing posture toward life grounded in the person of Christ who is the source of our joy. No circumstance can rob us of Him (Romans 8) and thus no situation can rob us of His joy.

Why do many believers not experience this ongoing joy in their lives? Simply, they do not stay close to the source of the joy - Jesus. The closer we stay to the source, the more joy we experience. It is also a matter of our focus. I can focus on all the challenges I face, or I can choose to focus on the blessings I have. Living with thanksgiving moves us toward joy, appreciation for the gifts God gives and most important of all gives us the faith that He will continue to be faithful in our lives. 

I desire to have the full measure of Christ's joy (John 17:13). Think about that statement - the full measure of His joy! What a way to live and what a gift from Him. We all choose our posture toward life. This choice changes the life equation.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Leadership and forgiveness

The ability to forgive and not hold grudges is one of the fundamental requirements of leaders. Leaders are targets of ready criticism, of those who dislike their style or in the case of pastors take issue with their theology, preaching or decisions made. There is no shortage of opportunities for leaders to need to forgive.

When we don't, we often become cynical of people, develop inner mistrust, hold anger beneath the surface and categorize people according to how they treat us. None of which are healthy responses. And if we think we are victims of too much criticism think of Paul or Jesus. They had need to forgive regularly.

Ironically, in a leadership role, the more we forgive the happier we are and the more free we are with people. They target us, we keep close accounts and are able to move on. They may hold their hostility or issues but we must not. This is not about ignoring  bad behavior but it is about not living in the prison of unforgiveness.

Thus forgiveness is a necessary skill for every good leader. It's exercise leads to humility while its absence leads to a hard arrogance. Something for all leaders to consider.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Signs of a toxic ministry leader

Yes, they do exist, and in too many places. Ministry is a place where almost anyone who has some skill can set themselves up for leadership in some manner. And in ministry, we often seem to give toxic leaders a pass because they preach well or because in the name of "grace" we are afraid to call them on what is candidly just bad behavior.

Here are some signs of toxicity in ministry leaders. Toxicity is about an ongoing pattern of behavior that is abusive, disempowering, and violates the Biblical standards of those who are called into Christian leadership (elders and deacons). 

• A pattern of treating people poorly, using them for their own purposes and marginalizing or demonizing those who disagree with them. Toxic leaders leave a trail of bodies in their wake - hurt and wounded.
• An inability to apologize or wrongs committed, an inability to admit poor behavior and an unwillingness to ask forgiveness or seek reconciliation. In conflict, it is always the other person who was in the wrong.
• A pattern of anger, abusive words or threats that create a culture of fear and intimidation where people are afraid to speak their minds and when they do are marginalized.
• A pattern of narcissistic behavior where the leader needs to be right, does not like when people challenge him, is defensive and demeans those who disagree with him. Arrogance rather than humility is the operative word and attitude.
• A pattern of skating ethical edges.
• A pattern of unaccountability. They insist that people are accountable to them but are essentially unaccountable themselves. Often this means living by different rules and standards than are demanded of others.
• A lack of grace in dealing with those around them, especially staff.
• A pattern where words (and messages) do not match the leaders behavior behind the scenes. 
• A pattern of dishonesty which is necessary for toxic leaders who either lie about what happened when confronted or skew the truth significantly (untruth) to make them appear to be in the right and the other in the wrong.
• When confronted, they portray themselves as the victim rather as one who needs to take responsibility. Even apologies, when given are skewed to paint themselves as the one aggrieved.
• There is a lack of personal and ministry transparency.

I was once in a meeting with a pastor who exhibited many of these behaviors. We were attempting a reconciliation with a staff member he had mistreated and then fired. When I suggested that his behaviors would not have been tolerated in the organization I lead he said, "I didn't do to him anything that he didn't do to me." As if that was justification. 

In another instance I spent two hours with a ministry leader whose behaviors fit these patterns and he spent the entire evening recounting how every issue his leaders had talked to him about were someone else's problem. Not once in two hours did he take any personal responsibility for any of his own behavior. It was all about him.

Grace does not give leaders a pass for behavior that is outside the biblical norms for what is expected of a Christian leader. In my experience in church consulting the harm that is done by toxic leaders is very great and leaves a terrific amount of pain and anguish in its wake. 

It is one thing for people to suffer pain from those who don't know Jesus but when the perpetrator is a Christian leader it is even more deeply painful and disillusioning.  I have interviewed many such individuals and it will be years before they are whole again. After all they suffered from one who represented himself as an undershepherd of Jesus. 

I don't care how good a preacher one is, how brilliant a strategist or how big an organization one can grow. If our behaviors are not consistent with our message and the One we serve, we should not be leading - or allow others who are toxic to lead. This is a significant blind spot in the church today.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

The insider movement and Islamic ministry

There is a great deal of conversation in mission circles around the insider movement when doing evangelism with Muslims. The insider movement is not simply a phenomenon in ministry to Muslims but to Hindu's as well and is often defined by a scale of C1 to C6 depending on how "insider" it is. These practices have become divisive in the missions community as well as with churches who support those who are proponents of the practice.

ReachGlobal is not part of that movement and we don't even use the term. Rather we have a biblical and practical framework from which we approach ministry to Muslims (and and the principles would apply in ministry to Hindus and others. 

Biblical Framework

• You only come to God through Jesus.
• The Bible is the final and complete revelation.
• Jesus was both human and divine.
• The Godhead is of a Triune nature, Father, Son and Holy Spirit
• A Kingdom Community (church) is a fellowship of believers in Jesus Christ committed to gathering regularly for biblical purposes under a recognized spiritual leadership.
• Mohammed is not God's prophet and the Koran is not God's Scripture.

Practical Convictions

• Muslim ministry demands a flexibility to allow individuals to move toward Christ and followership.
• We need to trust the Holy Spirit in the process of helping new believers make decisions about how they respond to Islamic culture and religious practice.
• Our primary identity is that we are followers of Jesus.
• We encourage approaching people from their own context and framework of thinking to initiate conversation about the Gospel.
• Baptism will come about as a natural part of spiritual growth and followership of Christ.
• While we seek to approach people from their context, we never hide our followership of Christ or full commitment to the Gospel.
• We consider it inappropriate to pretend that we are something we are not, ie. followers of Islam, in order to share the Gospel.
• We encourage the use of Biblical translations that accurately reflect the intent of the original text.
• Our focus in on the centrality of the Gospel.

I realize that some who read this blog have differing convictions but we believe that the above reflects a Biblical framework for doing evangelism with Muslims.

Graciousness is a mark of a good leader

Many leaders run so hard and are so consumed by success that they run over people in the process. After all, it is results that matter! Not so. It is people that matter first, starting with those who serve as our staff and colleagues. If we disempower our staff and treat them poorly we have failed as healthy leaders. 

Leaders can mistreat staff in many ways: curt words, not having time to listen, lack of empathy, giving ultimatums, threats, intimidation, course language, dismissal of other viewpoints, demeaning language, marginalization, and I could go on. I have seen all of this and more in Christian organizations. I was once in a reconciliation meeting between a leader and one of their staff members who had been subject to much of the above. When I told the leader that this kind of behavior would not be acceptable in the organization I led, he said, "Well I didn't do anything to him that he didn't do to me." So much for leadership.

Good leaders are gracious. They treat people well and care about them. They truly see people as their most important asset. They are kind, gentle, caring and empathetic even as they provide clarity and leadership. They are not pushovers but nor do they practice pushing over. 

I am often surprised when organizations put up with leadership behavior that is substandard because the leader "delivers." In other words, they give the leader a "pass" on behaviors that are truly not acceptable because they deliver results. No leader is exempt from treating those around them well. Results as the expense of people are not acceptable results - in my view. And they don't reflect the character of Jesus. Graciousness is a mark of a good leader. 

Foolishness and wisdom

The book of Proverbs has much to say about the foolish and the wise, as do the other books of Wisdom. I define wisdom in this manner: 

Wisdom is the ability to look at life situations and relationships from God's viewpoint and to respond in prudent ways that are consistent with His character. Wisdom takes into account potential solutions and unintended consequences, often by thinking gray. It then charts a course of action that is most likely to be productive and to minimize unintended consequences.

By definition, foolishness is the flip side of wisdom so we are foolish when we don't act wisely. And there is indeed a great deal of foolishness even among God's people and yes among leaders. Much conflict in local churches, for instance, is the result of foolish behavior that does not reflect God's viewpoint, character or prudent words or actions.

Responding to life situations in wisdom often requires time, prayer, thought and counsel. The foolish respond quickly and usually without the above. The wise individual restrains his emotions, anger and words in a tough situation while the fool does not. The wise take advice from those who will be honest while the foolish listen to those who will tell them what they want to hear. The results for both are predictable. Foolishness can be incredibly destructive.

All of us have joined the ranks of the foolish from time to time. None of us wants to live there. As you walk through your day today, think wisdom.

Reminder. My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

Five presuppositions that help us deal with disillusionment with God

We may not admit the truth even to ourselves, but disillusionment

with God is not uncommon among ministry leaders. And when it comes, it is often accompanied by an underlying anger that spills over in unexpected ways, onto unsuspecting people. Our personal issues with God become toxic as we struggle with the disconnect between our theology and painful personal experience. From this dissonance flows a poisonous mix of anger and bitterness. After all, there is no anger more personal than anger at God—anger that He allows or even causes circumstances that we believe He should not.

This is a dangerous moment for leaders because the relentless undercurrent of anger hurts those we lead, and our followers end up walking on eggshells around us. Where can we go for restoration in those situations? We go back to five basic truths and principles that must drive our spiritual leadership and must be the presuppositions from which we think, live, and minister. These core truths are what help us move toward God rather than away from Him when suffering comes our way.

One: God is good all the time, even though we live in a fallen world. We can always count on His goodness; we must trust in it, for if God is not good, nothing proclaimed in Scripture about Him can be trusted (see Romans 8:28-39; Psalm 23).

Two: God’s goodness does not preclude us from suffering. Indeed, we share in the fellowship of His sufferings (see Philippians 3:10), and our scars become trophies if we trust Him in the midst of our pain. 

Three: God’s ways are indeed inscrutable to human eyes—majestic,

eternal, sovereign, and divinely good in ways that we cannot understand this side of eternity (see Romans 9; Job 38-42).

Four: God has an eternal purpose in all things that transcends our limited understanding. That purpose is good and will be fulfilled as the glory of God becomes known across our globe. Often failure and pain are the antecedents to amazing glory and eternal success (see Isaiah 40).

Five: We play a humble part in God’s eternal purposes and cannot take personal responsibility for the completion of His plan. When we carry a burden of responsibility that He was meant to carry, we become weary, disillusioned, and often angry. We must leave His purposes and His burdens in His hands and watch Him unfold His inscrutable plan through us (see Ephesians 2:10).

Ed Stetzer interview with ebola survivor's family

Ebola and the Glory of God: An Interview with Nancy Writebol's Family (including Nancy's Comments)

Nancy Writebol has been released from the hospital. I interviewed her family about how they've dealt with the situation. |

Ed Stetzer

Why mission agencies do not pay ransom for staff who are kidnapped

The news that ISIS had demanded ransom for James Foley has raised the issue in the media about whether such payments should be made. Many countries quietly do just that. It is also an issue in the mission community since many staff work in places that put them at risk for kidnapping for ransom.

Most mission agencies at least in the United States have a policy that they will not pay ransom for kidnapped staff. It is based on the premise that however we handle the situation, we cannot put other missionaries at risk by our actions. Paying ransom simply encourages terrorist groups to repeat their actions since it pays off. This is why Somalia terrorists keep hijacking ships in the Indian Ocean. They have learned from experience that the companies will settle and it becomes a money making enterprise.

Mission agencies do have resources at their disposal for the negotiation or rescue of kidnapped staff. These are highly trained professionals who come out of the security world. If handled well, there is a very high probability of a positive outcome for kidnapped staff. Of course, groups like ISIS may change that equation as their ruthlessness is second to none. Good agencies have well thought out plans for crisis situations and update those plans regularly as threats emerge.

In today's world it is critical that we pray for the safety of our missionaries and national partners. It is an increasingly unsafe world where the tentacles of evil can reach almost anywhere. That is not to say we should live in fear but it is to say that we should pray for God's protection. 

If womens voices were heard in the church, it would be far healthier

Most churches have all male leadership - which I understand as most (but not all) evangelicals in the US are of the complimentarian rather than the egalitarian perspective. I do not intend to enter that debate here but to suggest that it often leaves out a significant voice in the average congregation. Men and women often process situations and issues differently. Thus, when the voice of women (50+ percent of a local church's constituency) is not heard, there is often a serious deficit in wisdom, decision making and perspective.

Not long ago I consulted with a congregation that had experienced major problems. In interviewing many people I found that the women in ministry positions (paid and volunteer) had a far better grasp of the issues in the church than the elders did. Yet they had never been asked for their perspective or wisdom. Ironically, there was more hands on ministry taking place among the women than the men, yet there voice was not valued or heard by the majority of the male leadership. 

Thankfully, that has changed and there is now a leadership community that includes both men and women - even though the church is complimentarian in its theology. They have found a forum to include both the voices of men and women without violating their theology. It indicates wisdom because no church will be healthy without the voice of both men and women being heard in appropriate settings.

It saddens me when women are marginalized in the church. In most churches they are the group that prays the most, serves the most and in many ways cares the most. Yet their voice is often not heard. Wisdom would be to ask the women ministry leaders in every congregation if they feel heard, valued and included. And, to ask them what issues they see that should be heard and considered by the leadership. You might be surprised by the wisdom you hear!

I suspect that Jesus listened far more carefully to the women who followed him and gave them far more respect than many male church leaders do. It gives one pause.

Reminder. My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

I feel like a failure as a leader

In my role as an organizational leader or consultant with other organizations it is not unusual to tell leaders that they are not in their ideal lane or playing to their skill set. This may be a pastor who cannot and does not manage staff, organizational leaders that are ineffective in determining how to accomplish their vision or leaders who have no idea how the shadow side of their strengths disempowers others. Often, the conversation about "lanes" and sweet spots is a result of being asked to help solve issues within the organization that are a result of a leader being out of their lane.

Here is the common but totally wrong response: "I have failed as a leader." Why wrong? Because all of us will generally be substandard at those things God did not wire us to do. We were wired on purpose by God to do the "good works" he designed specifically for us and gifted for that purpose (Ephesians 2:10). Of course we will be successful if we apply ourselves at those things He designed us for and conversely we will be poor at those things He did not design us for.

When we are not in our lane, and don't do well, the solution is not to work harder, longer or try to learn a new set of wiring. Rather it is to acknowledge how God created and designed us and get into a role that is inside the lane He designed us to play. When we work in the wrong lane we frustrate ourselves and those around us. When we run in the lane He designed us for we flourish and do well. 

Getting in our lane requires us to understand first what we are not good at and accept it. Some years ago I interviewed many members of an organizations staff and then shared with the leader what he was really good at and what he was really bad at. One of his first concerns was that his staff not know the weaknesses he had! The humor in it was that I knew about those weaknesses because his staff shared them with me. Yet he was not comfortable admitting that he had weaknesses. This is not only insecurity but bad theology because God gave us a gift or gifts but not more than a few. My staff will readily tell me what I don't do well and they work hard to keep me out of those lanes so their lives are easier!

It also means that we focus on those things we are good at and allow others to do what we are not good at. Usually, when leaders get into things that they are not gifted for they create chaos and disempowerment by doing so. Staff want to say, "Don't do that! You just put your nose into things that I can do very well and which you don't. Stay in your lane!" If you are a secure leader, simply ask your staff for examples where you operate out of your lane of giftedness and create problems for them. Pastors are often guilty of disempowering staff by getting into things that others are tasked with and which others also do much better than they.

If you are out of your lane, don't feel like you have failed as a leader. Rather, work to get into a place where you are playing to your strengths and don't assume you should be great at everything. You are not. No one is. Often our failure is simply in not understanding or accepting the lane God made us for. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Thoughts on Fergusun

A moving blog from the Gospel Coalition

A surprising map of the world's most and least religiously diverse countries

See this very helpful article on religious diversity across our globe. You may well be surprised.

A surprising map of the world's most and least religiously diverse countries

It was not a surprise to God

I have a dear friend who I had the joy of leading to Christ many years ago. This week I received news that he has been diagnosed with stage four prostate cancer - although treatable. He had gone in for surgery on a disc and in the course of the surgery they discovered a tumor from the unknown cancer. Upon awakening the doctor had to tell him that the rather routine surgery had discovered something really serious. My friend's reply to this surprise was "Well, God was not surprised!"

That response is one that applies to all of the surprises in life and leadership. We may be surprised but God is never surprised. That truth can give us confidence to trust Him for the very things that cause us anxiety and concern. Nothing surprises God and therefore we can be assured that He can help us work through our issues as a sovereign and faithful God.

Think of the largest issues you have faced - or face right now. The news may seem overwhelming as for my friend. Then remember: God was not surprised. In fact, nothing happens in our lives, good or bad, which does not first pass by the hands of God and which He does not use to build our faith. He knows, He cares and He superintends the outcome for His purposes. That ought to give us a quiet settled confidence not matter the situation. 

A life posture of humility

Scripture has a great deal to say about humility as this trait is deeply valued by God as opposed to a posture of pride. Psalm 131:1 says it well: my heart is not proud, O Lord, my eyes are not haughty. I do not concern myself with great matters, or things too wonderful for me."

Humility is a posture toward God and life. It includes the concept that there are many things we don't know and many things that we cannot know in relation to God who knows all things. Above all it is a posture of trust in God rather than in ourselves.

Psalm 131:2 says, "I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me." Humility is dependence on God, just as a young child is dependent on its mother and trusts his/her mother for one's daily needs. 

We often think that the best and brightest are those who know all the answers, are self sufficient, self made and have it all together. God says  not! The best and the brightest understand that a posture of humility rather than pride is what God looks for. And that is based on a posture of dependence on God rather than independence from Him.

Our hope is not in ourselves. Our wisdom comes from above. Our provision is a gift of God. As the Psalmist concludes, "put your hope in the Lord both now and forevermore. It is a life posture of humility.

Change is often necessary but the process we use will either create greater unity or dissention

Bringing change is a tricky business. Often the need for change, whether in a church or organization is profound. The world never stops changing and therefore while our eternal truths remain the same, change is inevitable. However, many change processes are deeply flawed and lead to the ministry taking steps back - and conflict rather than the intended result of leading it forward in unity.

I watch this often in churches where a pastor, often new decides that new ways of doing ministry are needed. What they often forget is that those who have been there a long while are used to what is. It is comfortable for them and most people simply don't like change. Here are some of the mistakes I watch in churches and organizations make leaders bring change.

1. They move too quickly. Just because the leader is ready to bring change does not mean their people are. Fast change is usually going to bring conflict, misunderstanding and even deep division within the organization. I have watched congregations literally lose half of their people when quick changes were made.

2. They don't talk and dialogue with their people at length before the change. People have strong opinions and feelings. If one can present a case for change that makes sense, most people will go with you but only if they have been part of the process and understand the end goal. The less dialogue up front, the more resistance there will be. Because that resistance is often an emotional response, it can cause emotional responses that are strong.

3. They don't take into account the various constituencies of the group. Sometimes it is wise to move in new directions without disenfranchising those who are vested in a different paradigm. Examples in the church might be worship styles or a desire to start small groups. Simply chopping out the old and putting in the new when it disenfranchises a significant segment of people is not wise. This is where patience and process is needed to get where you need to go without creating conflict and irritation.

4. They don't admit when significant resistance comes that the execution might be flawed. Sometimes one needs to take a step back before one can make a step forward. If people are balking it probably means that the change has been too fast, that process was not run and that some "compromises" need to be made. One can only move as fast as the organization is willing to follow. Significant resistance is a sign that you may need to evaluate the plan. I am not talking a few loud voices but significant groups.

5. They see resistors as "evil" or "bad" rather than understanding that often this is not the case. This further divides the group into those who support and those who oppose which then fractures relationships. When we categorize people we lose relationship and relationships are keys to major change. This is further complicated when leaders start to discount the opinions of those who resist.

Change is always an art. It is the art of helping people see where we could go and that in order to get there change is needed. But, the five mistakes above can be deadly if they are not taken into account. It is the job of leaders who bring change to ensure that it is done in a timely, wise, relational and healthy way so that the end product is both greater effectiveness and greater unity.

Transitioning: How to transition well when it is time for a leader to leave their position

This is a podcast from Leary Gates and guest Roger Thompson on what it means to transition well. Going out at the top of your game!

Podcast on transitioning

Endless emails and church/staff conflict

It is not unusual when working with a troubled church to read endless emails regarding whatever it is that has created conflict. Even more interesting to me is when there is dysfunction on a church staff and staff members who work in close proximity to one another are exchanging lengthy emails rather than walking down the hall (or to an office next door) to have a conversation. 

Email dialogues are rarely helpful for resolving conflict. In fact, I would posit that they actually raise the level of conflict because it is easier to state things in non-negotiable language in an email than it is in person or on the phone. Thus the dialogue often becomes even more strident in email conversations (confrontations). In addition, emails are often written in the heat of the moment lacking the gift of reflection. Even worse, emails can be copied to many others which now widens the potential conflict rather than keeping it between two parties. Word to the wise: never put in an email anything you don't want the world to hear because they may.

Emails do not allow one to sit down face to face and seek clarification, look one in the eye and listen carefully, empathize or challenge points of view in a personal way. I will often receive emails asking for an answer or seeking my perspective and I will reply, "It sounds like this is a conversation, not an email." Then I will schedule a phone call.

People with good emotional intelligence are not afraid of conversations. Often email exchanges are a substitute for a conversation out of fear or an unwillingness to dialogue with someone that we know disagrees with us. Ironically, personal conversations tend to diminish rather than increase the level of conflict. Especially if the two parties are at least willing to listen to each other and seek understanding. Email missives are a cowards way out of a personal conversation where we are more accountable for our words, body language and attitudes.

When there is conflict, walk down the hall, pick up the phone or make a Skype call rather than write down words you cannot retract and which may polarize rather than heal. In fact, this is my practice whenever I hear that there are people who have issues with me. Rather than wonder or make assumptions I pick up the phone and seek to resolve whatever it is that has caused a disruption in the relationship. 

In conflict, have a conversation rather than sending an email.

We are entering a new Dark Age with ISIS: The face of evil. Warning on graphic images

This is the face of ISIS, perhaps the greatest threat to humanity on our globe today because of the utter inhumanity toward anyone who does not fit their brand of Islam. The genocide and killing reminds me of the second world war whether from Stalin or Hitler except this time there are no world powers seriously seeking to check their progress. 

To ignore the actions ISIS when we know what they are doing is akin to those who ignored the actions of the Nazis in their extermination of the Jews. Some knew and chose not to act. Today those directly threatened are Christians, other minorities and anyone who does not adhere to the barbaric form of Islam represented by these evil individuals. If we think they are not a threat they have managed to take over towns and cities from near Aleppo in Syria to the outskirts of Baghdad in Iraq. They have their sights set on Lebanon and Israel and the United States. 

ISIS forces are barbaric. Killing is their specialty. If the evil one came to "kill, steal or destroy, (John 10:10), these are the evil one's children. ISIS is saying to Christians and others, convert or be killed! Kurdish officials are warning of genocide.

This is no longer an Iraqi problem. It is a humanitarian disaster, it is genocide before the eyes of the world and it is a movement that will threaten the entire globe with no regard for human life if not stopped. It is the very face of evil. How can the world watch and not act in the face of this kind of evil - or will we simply watch as the world did in Rwanda until the killing was over and the blood defiled all those who knew but did not act?

See these articles for more information or google ISIS and your heart will be broken. Please be aware of graphic images. You are looking into the face of evil personified!

The Daily Caller (CNN Videos)

National Review

Mail Online

CNN World

The Long War Journal

CNN

Reminder. My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

A nasty job done well

There are times when leaders, whether boards or senior leaders must tackle what can be fairly be called a nasty job. It may involve dealing with moral failures, financial downturns and the resultant decisions that must be made or moving someone out of an organization. Or perhaps dealing with a recalcitrant board member or individual who is hurting the organization. It is a nasty job because it is delicate, will not be received well, could have significant repercussions and on the surface it looks like there are no great outcomes and significant risks - but it must be done.

No one signs onto leadership for the nasty jobs but they are part of the equation from time to time. It is easy to become discouraged when faced with a messy situation. And not without reason as many messy situations are handled in a messy matter further complicating the picture. But that is not a necessary outcome. It is possible to handle nasty jobs well and in the meantime honor people and protect the organization. Here are some thoughts in dealing with messy or complicated situations.

1. Never act in haste unless you must. Take the time to ensure that you understand the situation as well as you can. Hasty action is usually a result of our own anxiety and will often have unintended consequences.
2. Never act alone. The more messy the situation the more important it is to have multiple counselors. You may also want to find a trusted outside counselor who you trust as they do not have a stake in the situation or outcome.
3. Work a process. To the extent that you can, engage in dialogue with the individual who you need to deal with (if it is an individual). When we are anxious we tend to make assumptions, send letters and emails. Try to stay in dialogue and be clear with the individual what you need, don't say things that don't need to be said and keep the circle of those involved as small as possible. You can make the right decision but fail in running a good process. It takes time to get to where you need to go so be patient in the process.
4. Make prayer central. It is amazing how sensitivity to the Holy Spirit's counsel can help navigate tough issues. There is power in a groups wisdom when each member of the group is also listening to the Holy Spirit along the way. You may be surprised at the insights He brings to the process.
5. To the extent that you can, and depending on the circumstances, treat individuals involved with utmost respect and fairness. In messy situations it is easy to get angry and express that anger but in dealing with it this is rarely helpful. 

I have been a party to helping many churches and organizations deal with messy and sometimes nasty jobs. it is a great gift when the end result is one of success because it was handled well. That is always the goal when faced with a nasty job: Can we handle it well!

How to spot a manipulative church leader

Unfortunately there are unhealthy, manipulative and narcissistic church leaders. This article by Donald Miller is worth reading.

How to spot a manipulative church leader 

Nobody has talked to us about Jesus before!

Friends of mine recently had dinner with the wife's employers (another husband and wife). They asked the husband what he did for a living and he told them that he worked for an agency that planted churches around the world and introduced people to Jesus. At the end of the evening the couple said to my friends, "No one has ever talked to us about Jesus before."

Yes, this was in the United States! They knew about religion but no one had talked to them about Jesus. We assume that in a "Christian" country (it is not), that Jesus is well known. That assumption is wrong. Sure people know the name but there are many like those above who have never been told that the Gospel is about a relationship with a person - Jesus.

Far from being offended, this couple was intrigued. I am sure it will lead to further conversation. As you interact with people, don't assume that they understand that Christianity is about a Savior with whom they can relate and enter into a personal relationship because of the incarnation. It is a life changing revelation!

Dirty church politics

If there is one thing I hate and I have to believe that Jesus hates as well is dirty politics in the church. Dirty politics where people with a hidden agenda use underhanded tactics including rumors, lies, gossip and manipulation of the church constitution at times to get what they want. One only has to read the book of Ephesians to know that there is nothing spiritual, God like or righteous in using unrighteous means to achieve one's will.

I was the victim of dirty politics in a church I served. I know how it felt and for years afterwards there were people who spread lies about me and my ministry. Their politics split the church. Unfortunately it is no unusual.

Here are some of the common characteristics of dirty politics.

First, there is a hidden agenda behind the scenes which is not stated because they know they would be discredited if it was. They have the conversations behind closed doors with those they are in alignment with but are never upfront about what they think or intend to do. It may be to derail the leadership direction of the leaders or be as blatant as forcing a pastor out.

Second, there are unrighteous things said. By unrighteous I mean falsehoods, rumors and outright lies. Information is passed along which is damaging to others that has never  been verified. Think of how often God says in the Scriptures that he hates falsehood. When this is present, evil is present.

Third, while they may use spiritual language the real issue is power. If it was about ministry they would be willing to state their position publicly so everyone knows. Anyone who does not do that is playing power politics with a hidden agenda and that is almost always about power, not true concern for the church nor concern for truth.

Fourth, these are people who are arsonists. They light fires with gossip and lies and then are not to be found when someone tries to figure out where they came from. In other words they refuse to be accountable for their words or actions which is power and unrighteousness combined. 

How do you know when this is taking place in your church? When there is gossip going around about leadership. When there are power plays in meetings. When common language is used which clearly indicates that there is a faction talking. When the issues are not clearly stated up front. When conflict starts to erode the congregation. When you start to hear common language from diverse people.

One of the best ways to counteract this is simply to tell the congregation what is taking place, what is being said and simply ask them if that is what they want. Chances are the perpetrators will run for the hills because they don't want a public debate. If they thought they would win that way they would do it. Rather they are using underhanded means because they know that the bulk of the congregation would not be in agreement with. It is unrighteous and cowardly behavior. We see it all the time in politics but it has no place in the church.

Be smart,  be truthful, be wise but don't let those who play by dirty politics to determine the direction of the church. In almost every instance where they succeed the church loses. Why should we be surprised? There is nothing righteous about their behavior!

See also  Hearing the voice behind the voices.