The gift of irritating questions that disrupt the conversation and current assumptions

 

Have you ever been in a team or board conversation when someone asks the kind of question that disrupts the whole dialogue? It happens when everyone is operating off one set of assumptions and one individual challenges those assumptions which brings the conversation to a standstill. These are golden moments because they force the common assumption to be examined and the disruptive and often uncomfortable question forces the group to deal with a deeper issue that underlies their conversation.

Let me give you an example. Church boards often deal with known issues without getting to the underlying causes (which would raise uncomfortable questions). It takes just one board member who is not conflict adverse to ask the deeper question as to why the issue exists! 

In one church I am familiar with, a long term pastor presided over a congregation that would go up to six or seven hundred and then fall to 300 - a cycle that was repeated fairly often in his career. The board spent a great deal of time trying to figure out how to keep this from happening until someone raised the uncomfortable question as to whether this actually had to do with the senior pastor's competency to lead at that level and his defensiveness that caused good leaders to leave the church. That question got to the table about 15 years later than it should have but it took one courageous board member to ask the disruptive question. And, it did put the issue in its proper perspective, whatever the outcome was going to be. 

Or take a discussion about "making disciples" that regularly takes place in church circles. Often the discussion goes way down the route of strategy for making disciples until someone asks the disruptive question: "Folks, we don't even have a good definition of a disciple so all this talk has no target or focus." An irritating comment that causes the discussion to go back to the beginning and ask what we are actually trying to achieve.

It is not unlike the question why? Why are we doing this? Why are we assuming that our strategy will get us to where we need to go? Why do we think this "conventional" idea is actually a good idea? How does this program or strategy get us to where we are trying to go? Is there a better way? 

Disruptive questions can be irritating but they force groups to clarify what they are after and focus on the right things rather than just the presenting issues. Usually they come from deep thinkers who are unafraid to raise the hard questions. They are a gift to any organization or board. 

Boards, teams and whole organizations get lost in group think, historical ways of looking at issues and assumptions that often no longer apply but remain the conventional wisdom. Here is something to think about. Conventional wisdom is always conventional but it is often not wisdom. It is simply the way we have done things in the past. Disruptive companies and ministries challenge those old ways and look for new ways to accomplish something different or more.

This always starts with individuals who are willing to ask the disruptive questions. Those questions challenge the current thinking and force the group to look at issues from a different angle. Many organizations, teams and boards do not realize what a gift this is to their organization but it truly is.

Calebs and Joshuas: The Key to Healthy Ministries

Our world is filled with naysayers: those who have little vision, small faith, high fear and frankly don't believe that God is capable of doing great things. This is true in the church, in missions, and any number of Christian organizations. The book written years ago "Your God is Too Small" applies today.

Small vision, little faith, and high fear factors to try something significant for God are responsible for much of the lack of fruit in many ministries. Board members who say "we've never done that before," pastors who are comfortable with the status quo, missionaries who don't really believe that God can break in and do something because of the "hard soil" all contribute to ministry initiatives that lack vision and faith or entrepreneurial spirit. It is life in the comfort zone of diminished and empty faith rather than life lived on faith that God can do what we cannot do!

The difference between those of small faith and those of big faith is this. The first group defines faith as that which we can accomplish by ourselves. The second group defines faith as that which only God can accomplish. The first is all about human effort and the second is all about divine power.

This was the divide between those who were sent by Moses into Canaan to explore it on behalf of the Israelites (Numbers 13-15). Ten of those who reported back reported what were probably true facts as they had seen them. Their conclusion was that the Israelites would never be successful in taking the land. They saw through human eyes and from that standpoint were probably quite accurate.

Caleb and Joshua, however, saw through divine eyes and they simply said, "We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it" (Numbers 13:30).

Their confidence was in the power of God rather than the strength of their army. "The land we passed through and explored is exceedingly good. If the Lord is pleased with us, he will lead us into that land, a land flowing with milk and honey and will give it to us. Only do not rebel against the Lord. And do not be afraid of the people of the land, because we will swallow them up. Their protection is gone, but the Lord is with us. Do not be afraid of them" (Numbers 14:7-9).

The negative ten focused on fear and human efforts. Caleb and Joshua focused on faith and God's provision. And it made all the difference in their perspective.

The church in the affluent west often bases their faith on what they can accomplish (or not) with their gifts, resources and plans. The missing factor is faith in Christ's ability and power to do far more than we could ever humanly do. After all, "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not (and cannot see)" Hebrews 12:1. If our plans and strategies and expectations of fruit only goes to what we ourselves can do we have shortchanged ourselves and underestimated God. God is not interested in what we can do by ourselves. He wants us to reach for things that only He can make possible so that He is the One who gets the glory - not us.

The church today is full of people like the ten who said, we cannot take the land. The church desperately needs the two - Caleb and Joshua who declare that we can - but only because it is God who goes before us. The mission world has many like the ten who really don't believe that God will actually break through in amazing ways. It too needs Calebs and Joshuas who live in the realm of deep abiding faith in the power and purpose of God to do far beyond what we could ask or imagine - in his strength, not ours.

Are you a Caleb or Joshua or more like the other ten? God calls us to "abundant and copious fruit (John 15) for the Kingdom based on his presence and power and Kingdom authority (Matthew 28:18-20). That takes vision, faith, belief and reliance on a power far greater than our own. Small faith leads to wandering in the wilderness like the Israelites. Courageous faith leads to the taking of the land. Which world do you live in today?

Irritating questions that disrupt the conversation

Have you ever been in a team or board conversation when someone asks the kind of question that disrupts the whole dialogue? It happens when everyone is operating off one set of assumptions and one individual challenges those assumptions which brings the conversation to a standstill. These are golden moments because they force the common assumption to be examined and the disruptive and often uncomfortable question forces the group to deal with a deeper issue that underlies their conversation.

Let me give you an example. Church boards often deal with known issues without getting to the underlying causes (which would raise uncomfortable questions). It takes just one board member who is not conflict adverse to ask the deeper question as to why the issue exists! 

In one church I am familiar with, a long term pastor presided over a congregation that would go up to six or seven hundred and then fall to 300 - a cycle that was repeated fairly often in his career. The board spent a great deal of time trying to figure out how to keep this from happening until someone raised the uncomfortable question as to whether this actually had to do with the senior pastor's competency to lead at that level and his defensiveness that caused good leaders to leave the church. That question got to the table about 15 years later than it should have but it took one courageous board member to ask the disruptive question. And, it did put the issue in its proper perspective, whatever the outcome was going to be. 

Or take a discussion about "making disciples" that regularly takes place in church circles. Often the discussion goes way down the route of strategy for making disciples until someone asks the disruptive question: "Folks, we don't even have a good definition of a disciple so all this talk has no target or focus." An irritating comment that causes the discussion to go back to the beginning and ask what we are actually trying to achieve.

It is not unlike the question why? Why are we doing this? Why are we assuming that our strategy will get us to where we need to go? Why do we think this "conventional" idea is actually a good idea? How does this program or strategy get us to where we are trying to go? Is there a better way? 

Disruptive questions can be irritating but they force groups to clarify what they are after and focus on the right things rather than just the presenting issues. Usually they come from deep thinkers who are unafraid to raise the hard questions. They are a gift to any organization or board. 

TJ Addington (Addington Consulting) has a passion to help individuals and organizations maximize their impact and go to the next level of effectiveness. He can be reached at tjaddington@gmail.com.

"Creating cultures of organizational excellence."