What is it about fathers that makes them so special if we had one that we loved and admired? And for those whose father failed that test, why is there such a hole in the heart of longing and sadness? Why are our emotions around our fathers often so conflicted: Love, admiration, longing, sadness where they failed us - emotions that can run strong because there is something special about fathers.
I wonder if much of these conflicting emotions come down to this: We need, long for, have been blessed by or desperately wished for our father's blessing and acceptance. How many people are still trying to gain their father's blessing and acceptance long into life when that blessing or acceptance was withheld? Is this the reason that emotions around our fathers remain strong for all of our lives?
Fathers who withhold blessing and acceptance from their children leave a legacy of longing that never fully goes away. Those who give this gift are easily forgiven their many failures because this gift is so powerful!
I believe that a father's acceptance and blessing is really a spiritual longing and mirrors our need for God's acceptance and blessing. God is the father none of us fully had for He is the perfect father and He bestows on us full acceptance, divine blessing and loving encouragement. He knows us fully and still loves us fully. His love is unconditional and cannot be earned. His favor is upon us even when He lovingly disciplines us.
For those of us who are fathers, our example for fatherhood is the character and person of our God. For those of us who long for a father figure they never had, God is their ultimate father! Seek His blessing for He freely gives it!
To all fathers: Never withhold acceptance and blessing from your children. It is what all children need from their fathers - as youngsters and as adults. We can fail at many things but if we fail at this we will leave a deep hole in the hearts of our offspring.
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Saturday, June 16, 2012
Enemies of a leader's heart
Our hearts have enemies that would like nothing less than to sabotage our personal lives and ministry effectiveness. We ignore them to our peril. Which of these enemies are you ignoring?
Out of control schedules that leave too little margin for the feeding of our own souls. A starved heart cannot give life to us or to others.
Substituting professional knowledge of God for the inner transformation of our lives from God: A subtle shift that makes all the difference in the world.
Leadership success that causes us to increasingly rely on our own wisdom than being dependent on God's Spirit and power.
Professional and personal spiritual pride that keeps us from listening to God and to others around us.
The seduction of position and power that convinces us that we are different and entitled. Power and position without intentional safeguards breed deceived hearts.
Deceit which comes from the seduction of position and power allowing us to think the rules don't apply to us and to skirt ethical and truthful boundaries.
Arrogance that keeps us from listening to God and to others leaving our hearts exposed to its enemies.
Isolation which robs us of the natural accountability of close friends or others we are accountable to. Lack of accountability is a precursor to personal failure.
The praise of others which exaggerates our spiritual and professional health and underestimates our depravity and sinful tendencies. We believe it to our peril.
Using a ministry mission as a platform for a personal mission that is more about us than it is about God - hidden behind a spiritual facade.
What are the enemies of your heart and where have those enemies breached your walls and threaten to harm you? Be aware, be vigilant and guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life.
Out of control schedules that leave too little margin for the feeding of our own souls. A starved heart cannot give life to us or to others.
Substituting professional knowledge of God for the inner transformation of our lives from God: A subtle shift that makes all the difference in the world.
Leadership success that causes us to increasingly rely on our own wisdom than being dependent on God's Spirit and power.
Professional and personal spiritual pride that keeps us from listening to God and to others around us.
The seduction of position and power that convinces us that we are different and entitled. Power and position without intentional safeguards breed deceived hearts.
Deceit which comes from the seduction of position and power allowing us to think the rules don't apply to us and to skirt ethical and truthful boundaries.
Arrogance that keeps us from listening to God and to others leaving our hearts exposed to its enemies.
Isolation which robs us of the natural accountability of close friends or others we are accountable to. Lack of accountability is a precursor to personal failure.
The praise of others which exaggerates our spiritual and professional health and underestimates our depravity and sinful tendencies. We believe it to our peril.
Using a ministry mission as a platform for a personal mission that is more about us than it is about God - hidden behind a spiritual facade.
What are the enemies of your heart and where have those enemies breached your walls and threaten to harm you? Be aware, be vigilant and guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Moving from fear to friendships with Muslims
Westerners have a caricature of Muslims that is largely based on media hype around radical Islamists, 9/11, the politics of Iran, Bin Laden, our wars in Iraq and the threat of Iran - all of which tend to breed fear, a desire to keep our distance and frankly a dislike and even disdain for Muslims.
Here is the problem. First, when it comes to the majority of Muslims, none of our caricature is remotely true. Second, Jesus loves Muslims with the same degree of which He loves non-Muslims which leads me to three: we are called to love and minister to those Jesus loves and who (like us) were made in His image.
Stereotypes are almost always the result of a lack of relationship with those we marginalize and stereotype. So the antidote to the caricature we have of Muslims is to actually engage with them in friendship. If every American evangelical had one Muslim friend the attitudes of the same would be vastly different.
I have met many Muslims and interacted with them on numerous ocasssions in the United States and internationally. Somali Muslim kids wave to me from across the street every morning and their basement is furnished with furniture that we outsourced. My taxi drivers and airport workers in Minneapolis are largely Muslim. I have had lengthy conversations with Muslims in my travels.
While Muslims have a different mindset than we do they have the same dreams, aspirations, struggles, family issues and so on that we do. They are ordinary people who want to live their lives in peace, make a living wage, and negotiate life as well as they can. And most of them welcome a friendship with an American and separate American politics from friendship with American individuals. And because of the hospitality culture they come from once you are a friend, they will be intensely loyal.
As in all cases, friendships are the key to killing stereotypes and opening doors for the Gospel. As it relates to Muslims, the church in the United States must move from fear to friendship with their Muslim neighbors. In doing so our stereotypes will die, real friendships will emerge, the door will be opened to the Gospel and bridges built. Ironically you have more in common with Muslims as an individual than you have that separates you from them. But one does not know that without a friendship.
In fact, the premier curriculum for helping evangelicals understand Muslims and share the Gospel with Muslims is called Bridges and is available from the Crescent Project.
Certainly there are radical Muslims I don't want to associate with and Bin Laden when he was alive never invited me for a cup of tea and had he done so it might have ended badly. But truth be told there are people who call themselves Christians that I don't want to associate with as well (Westboro Baptist Church for instance). As any Baptist would point out, they don't represent Baptists but their own radical agenda. Radicals of any persuasion are not my cup of tea (including in the evangelical sphere) but they also don't represent most others.
My challenge for Christ followers is to develop at least one friendship with a Muslim and see how God uses that to change your heart and perhaps their heart. It will also help us move past our fear to something even more important: friendship - where the Gospel usually starts.
Here is the problem. First, when it comes to the majority of Muslims, none of our caricature is remotely true. Second, Jesus loves Muslims with the same degree of which He loves non-Muslims which leads me to three: we are called to love and minister to those Jesus loves and who (like us) were made in His image.
Stereotypes are almost always the result of a lack of relationship with those we marginalize and stereotype. So the antidote to the caricature we have of Muslims is to actually engage with them in friendship. If every American evangelical had one Muslim friend the attitudes of the same would be vastly different.
I have met many Muslims and interacted with them on numerous ocasssions in the United States and internationally. Somali Muslim kids wave to me from across the street every morning and their basement is furnished with furniture that we outsourced. My taxi drivers and airport workers in Minneapolis are largely Muslim. I have had lengthy conversations with Muslims in my travels.
While Muslims have a different mindset than we do they have the same dreams, aspirations, struggles, family issues and so on that we do. They are ordinary people who want to live their lives in peace, make a living wage, and negotiate life as well as they can. And most of them welcome a friendship with an American and separate American politics from friendship with American individuals. And because of the hospitality culture they come from once you are a friend, they will be intensely loyal.
As in all cases, friendships are the key to killing stereotypes and opening doors for the Gospel. As it relates to Muslims, the church in the United States must move from fear to friendship with their Muslim neighbors. In doing so our stereotypes will die, real friendships will emerge, the door will be opened to the Gospel and bridges built. Ironically you have more in common with Muslims as an individual than you have that separates you from them. But one does not know that without a friendship.
In fact, the premier curriculum for helping evangelicals understand Muslims and share the Gospel with Muslims is called Bridges and is available from the Crescent Project.
Certainly there are radical Muslims I don't want to associate with and Bin Laden when he was alive never invited me for a cup of tea and had he done so it might have ended badly. But truth be told there are people who call themselves Christians that I don't want to associate with as well (Westboro Baptist Church for instance). As any Baptist would point out, they don't represent Baptists but their own radical agenda. Radicals of any persuasion are not my cup of tea (including in the evangelical sphere) but they also don't represent most others.
My challenge for Christ followers is to develop at least one friendship with a Muslim and see how God uses that to change your heart and perhaps their heart. It will also help us move past our fear to something even more important: friendship - where the Gospel usually starts.
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Generous churches
Is it possible that many churches see little fruit because they live selfishly? By that I mean that they exist primarily for themselves rather than for those who do not yet know Jesus.
They would never say that about themselves of course. But the number of people who come to Jesus through their ministry are few, and they have little or no impact beyond the edges of their parking lot.
Generous churches, like generous people, see beyond themselves and their mission is not primarily about themselves but about impacting lives and communities with the Gospel. They give away their time, energy, resources and love so that the name of Jesus is lifted high and His name becomes well known. They love on their community, they love on the unloved, and they love on the unsaved. So much so that whole communities know that they are a congregation of love.
Generous congregations love when people come to them but they are focused on going to others, meeting them on their ground and ministering to them on their turf. They look for ways to meet needs, share truth and love people in the name of Jesus. They don't wait for people to come to them but find ways to go to others.
Life is not about us but about Jesus. It is true for us personally and it is true for congregations. Just as many Christ followers don't get that, so many congregations don't get that. But those who do see the fruit of their generosity as people and communities are impacted with His love and we are energized by our Christ centered actions and God's smile on our lives.
How do we know whether we are a generous congregation? Here is the test. Would those in our area say we love on the community? Do they even know we are there or are we a non-event because our influence stays inside the boundaries of our parking lot? Are we living generously or selfishly?
They would never say that about themselves of course. But the number of people who come to Jesus through their ministry are few, and they have little or no impact beyond the edges of their parking lot.
Generous churches, like generous people, see beyond themselves and their mission is not primarily about themselves but about impacting lives and communities with the Gospel. They give away their time, energy, resources and love so that the name of Jesus is lifted high and His name becomes well known. They love on their community, they love on the unloved, and they love on the unsaved. So much so that whole communities know that they are a congregation of love.
Generous congregations love when people come to them but they are focused on going to others, meeting them on their ground and ministering to them on their turf. They look for ways to meet needs, share truth and love people in the name of Jesus. They don't wait for people to come to them but find ways to go to others.
Life is not about us but about Jesus. It is true for us personally and it is true for congregations. Just as many Christ followers don't get that, so many congregations don't get that. But those who do see the fruit of their generosity as people and communities are impacted with His love and we are energized by our Christ centered actions and God's smile on our lives.
How do we know whether we are a generous congregation? Here is the test. Would those in our area say we love on the community? Do they even know we are there or are we a non-event because our influence stays inside the boundaries of our parking lot? Are we living generously or selfishly?
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Sticker shock in missions
It often surprises people when mission candidates share the amount that they need to raise per month. One candidate in the process of raising support told me that they will often hear "Wow, I don't make that much" when they explain that they need to raise $6,000 per month.
Not so fast! Missionaries in our organization make a fair but modest income. But, we are not comparing oranges with oranges when thinking about our income and what missionaries need to raise.
Think about this. The total amount a missionary raises includes the following:
Not so fast! Missionaries in our organization make a fair but modest income. But, we are not comparing oranges with oranges when thinking about our income and what missionaries need to raise.
Think about this. The total amount a missionary raises includes the following:
- salary
- health insurance*
- travel expenses (for all ministry related travel domestically and internationally)*
- ministry expenses*
- cost of educating children overseas
- housing
- taxes (including all of social security)*
- continuing education*
- retirement*
- cost of setting up a home overseas
Each of the starred items are "hidden costs" in the United States as these are paid partially or fully by employers and never show up as compensation. In addition, there are expenses missionaries have that most of us don't including the need to pay for the education of children.
If they are living in cities with high housing costs (often the case in Europe and Asia) the housing costs are significantly higher than the United States. It is not unusual for a modest flat in a place like Hong Kong to cost $3,000 per month!
In addition, whatever ministry expenses a missionary has must come out of their support. Travel to coach or train nationals, for instance, comes out of their ministry account (which they must raise). In today's world, many missionaries live in one place but travel to multiple countries training, coach and mentoring. All costs which come out of what they must raise.
In addition, whatever ministry expenses a missionary has must come out of their support. Travel to coach or train nationals, for instance, comes out of their ministry account (which they must raise). In today's world, many missionaries live in one place but travel to multiple countries training, coach and mentoring. All costs which come out of what they must raise.
What we often don't think about are the actual costs of ministry personnel in our local churches. On top of salary you have benefits paid by the church, the cost of offices and facilities, the cost of support personnel who assist them as well as the covering of ministry expenses. It is a much larger bill than we often realize. With missionaries the difference is that everything shows up in what they need to raise. There are no hidden costs.
Ironically, mission incomes are quite modest. It is the ancillary costs that are not. The next time you have sticker shock remember what the number means - and does not mean.
One final comment. We should never use the cost of sending missionaries as an excuse to no longer send long term personnel internationally. That would be to abandon the call on the church to fulfill the Great Commission. It is true that in today's world the role of missionaries is changing but not the need.
One final comment. We should never use the cost of sending missionaries as an excuse to no longer send long term personnel internationally. That would be to abandon the call on the church to fulfill the Great Commission. It is true that in today's world the role of missionaries is changing but not the need.
Monday, June 11, 2012
How do we help people grasp the fact that lost people are lost and face an eternity without Jesus?
It is not politically correct to state this. We don't like to hear this. Many evangelicals in their bones do not believe this. Lost people (those who don't know Jesus) are lost and without a relationship with Him they are destined for an eternity in hell. In the words of Jesus, "Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels (Matthew 25:41).'"
Many American believers like to believe that "all roads somehow lead to God and to heaven." We like to believe that because it fits our politically correct culture and Satan has convinced many Christians that a loving God would not allow "good" people to go to hell. It is like hoping that we will somehow not die one day. It defies the laws of human existence, just as hoping our lost friends, family and colleagues defies the laws of God's clearly stated truth.
If we cannot trust the Scriptures that those who are lost for eternity will not be in heaven how can we trust the Scriptures that those who know Jesus will be in heaven. Scriptures are either truthful or not and on eternal destinies there is wonderful news and terrible news.
How do I know that many Christ followers don't believe in the reality of eternal hell for all those who don't know Jesus? Surveys tell us that! But more importantly, lifestyles tell us that. If we really believed in an eternity without God would we not be more motivated to pray for our unsaved friends, spend time with them, share the Good news with them and do all that we could to see them introduced to Jesus? It would also motivate us to generously resource the global missions of the church to reach those who have never had a chance to hear the Gospel.
We are more motivated today to talk to others about the diet we found that is working for us than we are Jesus who changed our lives forever - and can change theirs. Why? We possess the most amazing gift anyone could ever have and we are too shy or fearful to share that news with others.
The fact that those who don't know Jesus are destined for eternity without God needs to be a conversation we have with ourselves, with others and for those of us in Christian ministry with our constituents. It is not evangelism motivated by guilt but motivated by deep love, compassion and concern. How many people do we come into contact with daily who are the living lost and one day will be the eternally lost?
If you struggle with sharing the good news of Jesus, it starts by developing relationships with unbelievers. Those conversations inevitably lead to talk about our lives and struggles which gives us open doors to talk about faith and Christ. It is very simple. We underestimate the power of the Gospel's simple message to penetrate hearts. Not because we were convincing but because the Holy Spirit takes that message gives it understanding in those who are seeking. All we need to do is to share.
Many American believers like to believe that "all roads somehow lead to God and to heaven." We like to believe that because it fits our politically correct culture and Satan has convinced many Christians that a loving God would not allow "good" people to go to hell. It is like hoping that we will somehow not die one day. It defies the laws of human existence, just as hoping our lost friends, family and colleagues defies the laws of God's clearly stated truth.
If we cannot trust the Scriptures that those who are lost for eternity will not be in heaven how can we trust the Scriptures that those who know Jesus will be in heaven. Scriptures are either truthful or not and on eternal destinies there is wonderful news and terrible news.
How do I know that many Christ followers don't believe in the reality of eternal hell for all those who don't know Jesus? Surveys tell us that! But more importantly, lifestyles tell us that. If we really believed in an eternity without God would we not be more motivated to pray for our unsaved friends, spend time with them, share the Good news with them and do all that we could to see them introduced to Jesus? It would also motivate us to generously resource the global missions of the church to reach those who have never had a chance to hear the Gospel.
We are more motivated today to talk to others about the diet we found that is working for us than we are Jesus who changed our lives forever - and can change theirs. Why? We possess the most amazing gift anyone could ever have and we are too shy or fearful to share that news with others.
The fact that those who don't know Jesus are destined for eternity without God needs to be a conversation we have with ourselves, with others and for those of us in Christian ministry with our constituents. It is not evangelism motivated by guilt but motivated by deep love, compassion and concern. How many people do we come into contact with daily who are the living lost and one day will be the eternally lost?
If you struggle with sharing the good news of Jesus, it starts by developing relationships with unbelievers. Those conversations inevitably lead to talk about our lives and struggles which gives us open doors to talk about faith and Christ. It is very simple. We underestimate the power of the Gospel's simple message to penetrate hearts. Not because we were convincing but because the Holy Spirit takes that message gives it understanding in those who are seeking. All we need to do is to share.
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Emerging leaders
After spending several days with a bright group of emerging leaders in dialogue about the heart, leadership, strategies and spiritual transformation I am reminded of the significant responsibility that seasoned leaders have toward the next generation. If we don't pour into them who will?
Some of these were in missions, others in the local church, some in business. What characterized them was a hunger to learn, to explore, and to pick the brains of those of us who were presenting and dialoguing with them. I was personally challenged by their passion and commitment to Jesus - and their desire to lead well.
All of us have people in our circles who fit the description of emerging leaders, whether it be in the church, in other ministry contexts, in missions or in business. Our willingness to give ourselves away to them is the indicator of how much we value ensuring that the next generation is equipped and envisioned for the world they will inherit from us.
While leadership growth never stops, those of us who have led, who have paid dumb tax and learned lessons along the way, who have experienced failure and success, been humbled, and who been forged in the midst of difficulties and challenges - have a lot to contribute to those who are emerging in the next generation of leaders. They will lead differently but their leadership can be deeply informed by others who will pour into them.
This is a 2 Timothy 2:2 issue: Multiplying ourselves so that the cause of Jesus is multiplied in our world. What are you doing to see that happen in your circle? Remember, life is not about us but what we leave behind us.
Some of these were in missions, others in the local church, some in business. What characterized them was a hunger to learn, to explore, and to pick the brains of those of us who were presenting and dialoguing with them. I was personally challenged by their passion and commitment to Jesus - and their desire to lead well.
All of us have people in our circles who fit the description of emerging leaders, whether it be in the church, in other ministry contexts, in missions or in business. Our willingness to give ourselves away to them is the indicator of how much we value ensuring that the next generation is equipped and envisioned for the world they will inherit from us.
While leadership growth never stops, those of us who have led, who have paid dumb tax and learned lessons along the way, who have experienced failure and success, been humbled, and who been forged in the midst of difficulties and challenges - have a lot to contribute to those who are emerging in the next generation of leaders. They will lead differently but their leadership can be deeply informed by others who will pour into them.
This is a 2 Timothy 2:2 issue: Multiplying ourselves so that the cause of Jesus is multiplied in our world. What are you doing to see that happen in your circle? Remember, life is not about us but what we leave behind us.
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