The Bully Series: When church boards don't confront church bullies

 

Church bullies are toxic to the local church. They create divisions and unhealthy alliances, spread gossip and rumors, and undermine leaders regularly. They do this to accomplish their ends. They may be angry, have an agenda, or want to hurt leaders, whether boards or the senior Pastor. But the end result of their toxic, unethical, and unbiblical behavior is to hurt God's people. If you are a church leader, please read that last sentence again because it matters. 

Here is the problem with church boards and church bullies. Boards are very reluctant to deal with them. They are intimidated by them and don't want to rock the boat. They find all kinds of ways to justify this toxic behavior. "Oh, that is just Joe; get used to it." Listen, Betty is a good person despite all the gossip and malicious lies she tells." "We have always had a problem with Bill." 

And who gets hurt? First, God's people. The leadership becomes complicit in the toxicity when they refuse to deal with it. Bullies use disinformation, unkind words, gossip, malicious charges, and underhanded techniques to get their way. And they refuse to be held accountable. They triangulate leaders and, in the process, create doubt, distrust, and undermine senior leaders. Often, the senior Pastor. 

I am asking passive boards to reconsider their inaction when it comes to those who are toxic in the church. You are the key to solving these issues, and I invite you to do what God needs you to do and protect the body of Christ. 

I have several questions for church boards.

First, if you were the target of this malicious behavior, would you want someone to stand up for you? That is what senior pastors often don't get. They are expected to put up with unacceptable behavior in the church because you, as a board member, will not call the bullies out and confront them on their behavior. Many pastors live in pain or choose to move on when boards will not protect them.

Second, if you were a business or business owner leader, would you allow this behavior in your organization? Of course, you would not. You would recognize that this behavior does not serve you well and is undermining you and what you are trying to accomplish, and you would put a decisive stop to it. So why do you allow it to continue in the church?

Third, what do you make of frequent commands to Timothy and others to deal with divisive people in the church because their behavior is antithetical to what God has called us to? One day, you will stand before God and account for what you did and did not do as a leader and whether you protected the flock for such sinful behavior. 

You cannot have a healthy church with unchallenged toxic behavior! It will not happen, so pretending it is OK and you don't need to act is foolish and naive. Paul specifically commands leaders to deal with the three wolves of heresy (false teaching), sinful behavior (that is ongoing and egregious), and those who sow division in the church. Paul challenged the church in Corinth to deal with those who sowed division and those living in unrepentant sin. 

Church bullies do what they do because they suspect no one will challenge their behavior. After all, they have gotten away with it for a long time. They refuse to be accountable and refuse to repent, apologize, and adopt healthy behaviors. And boards coddle them, don't confront them, and tell pastors this is just the price of ministry. That is wrong, unbiblical, toxic, and makes leaders complicit. And thousands of complicit church leaders refuse to do what they are supposed to do as undershepherds of God's flock and protect the body of Christ. 

If you are one of those board members who will not confront sinful behavior (it is), either step aside or do the job God has given you to do. The health of your congregation is at stake.

Blogs in this series:

How to spot a bully in the church

When church boards don't confront church bullies

Confronting the bad behaviors of church bullies

When the Pastor is the bully

The close connection between narcissism and bully behaviors in the church

When the bully is a church board member

Church congregational meetings are an indicator of church health

 

The first congregational meeting I attended in a church I was a member of was a disaster. A staff member had been let go, and a delegation came to defend him and skewer the church leaders. In the heat of the moment, the church chairman told someone to call the police! It went downhill from there. 

The tone, behavior, and tenor of congregational meetings say a lot about the health of the church. If dysfunction exists in the congregation, it is likely to show itself here. Because it is here that leaders either choose to be properly transparent or to hide their agendas and where the congregation has a chance to say what it wants to say in whatever way they choose to do so. Here are some markers of congregational meetings and what they say about the health of the church.

One: Leaders have the opportunity to craft public meetings, which means that they have the ability to control the agenda in ways that are either healthy or unhealthy. When leaders surprise the congregation in public meetings in large ways, they have led poorly, as this is not the place to drop something large on the congregation, and expect that they will act on it quickly. Usually, surprising the congregation in a public meeting means that the leadership did not have the will or the courage to lay the groundwork ahead of time.

Two: How transparent leaders are on issues that they can be candid about says a lot about their leadership. When they are secretive, don't answer the concerns of the congregation or will not explain issues that deserve an explanation, they are usually working from defensive, fearful, or authoritarian positions. Where there are complicated issues to discuss, such as budgets or bi-law changes, good leaders will provide venues prior to the meeting so that all concerns can be addressed. However, in either case, their willingness to listen, respond and be honest is a key indicator of their health.

Three: The attitude of the congregation in public meetings says much about the health of the body as a whole. When public charges are made in a less than loving matter, when opinions are expressed with anger or where there are personal attacks or hidden agendas behind comments and questions, it does not come from Jesus! The fruit of the Spirit in all congregational deliberations is a sign of its health and the absence of its dishealth.

Four: This is one that many leaders don't get. When they don't provide adequate communication, don't listen to their congregation, or have an agenda that the congregation does not desire to follow and does not feel right about, they will be challenged where there is an opportunity, and this is one of those opportunities. When leaders will not address the concerns of many, there will be an eruption somewhere, and it is often in this venue. While I don't condone any eruptions that don't display the fruit of the Spirit on this one, I don't blame the congregation but insensitive leaders who have not done their job well. If you frustrate the congregation long enough, it will come out at some point.

Congregations are families. When families get along, it is because they are operating out of health. When they don't get along, they are operating from dishealth.

How do you know if your meetings are healthy? Ask yourself if you want to go to them. If you have anxiety over them or feel the tension in the room, there is dysfunction afoot. Leaders, especially, ought to be aware of those tensions and do what they need to do in order to lead well.

Congregational meetings and church health

The first congregational meeting I attended in a church I was a member of was a disaster. A staff member had been let go, and a delegation came to defend him and skewer the church leaders. In the heat of the moment, the church chairman told someone to call the police! It went downhill from there. 

The tone, behavior, and tenor of congregational meetings say a lot about the health of the church. If dysfunction exists in the congregation, it is likely to show itself here. Because it is here that leaders either choose to be properly transparent or to hide their agendas and where the congregation has a chance to say what it wants to say in whatever way they choose to do so. Here are some markers of congregational meetings and what they say about the health of the church.

One: Leaders have the opportunity to craft public meetings, which means that they have the ability to control the agenda in ways that are either healthy or unhealthy. When leaders surprise the congregation in public meetings in large ways, they have led poorly, as this is not the place to drop something large on the congregation, and expect that they will act on it quickly. Usually, surprising the congregation in a public meeting means that the leadership did not have the will or the courage to lay the groundwork ahead of time.

Two: How transparent leaders are on issues that they can be candid about says a lot about their leadership. When they are secretive, don't answer the concerns of the congregation or will not explain issues that deserve an explanation, they are usually working from defensive, fearful, or authoritarian positions. Where there are complicated issues to discuss, such as budgets or bi-law changes, good leaders will provide venues prior to the meeting so that all concerns can be addressed. However, in either case, their willingness to listen, respond and be honest is a key indicator of their health.

Three: The attitude of the congregation in public meetings says much about the health of the body as a whole. When public charges are made in a less than loving matter, when opinions are expressed with anger or where there are personal attacks or hidden agendas behind comments and questions, it does not come from Jesus! The fruit of the Spirit in all congregational deliberations is a sign of its health and the absence of its dishealth.

Four: This is one that many leaders don't get. When they don't provide adequate communication, don't listen to their congregation, or have an agenda that the congregation does not desire to follow and does not feel right about, they will be challenged where there is an opportunity, and this is one of those opportunities. When leaders will not address the concerns of many, there will be an eruption somewhere, and it is often in this venue. While I don't condone any eruptions that don't display the fruit of the Spirit on this one, I don't blame the congregation but insensitive leaders who have not done their job well. If you frustrate the congregation long enough, it will come out at some point.

Congregations are families. When families get along it is because they are operating out of health. When they don't get along they are operating from dishealth.

How do you know if your meetings are healthy? Ask yourself if you want to go to them. If you have anxiety over them or feel the tension in the room, there is dysfunction afoot. Leaders, especially, ought to be aware of those tensions and do what they need to do in order to lead well.

TJ Addington of Addington Consulting has a passion to help individuals and organizations maximize their impact and go to the next level of effectiveness. He can be reached at tjaddington@gmail.com.

Great article from the Wall Street Journey on the perils of "Wannabe cool" Christianity.

This article says a lot about many churches today. And it is not the kind of church I seem to read about in the New Testament - contextualization aside. It is well worth a read!

The Perils of "wannabe cool" Christianity

What would happen in our churches if.....

What would happen if...

We challenged all of our college age kids to take one year to do some kind of holistic ministry either nationally or internationally?

We offered every high schooler an adult mentor who would meet with them, pray for them and encourage them?

We offered every newly married couple an older married mentor couple?

We told people that generosity with God was a joyful way to live?

We helped all of our people use their gifts in meaningful ministry rather than simply filling ministry slots we have created?

We encouraged ten percent of our congregation to give two weeks to ministry either locally, domestically or internationally every year?

We valued our seniors as much as we did our young folks?

We showed everyone how they could form their own prayer team to pray for them regularly and for them to be transparent with?

We encouraged every family to develop a relationship with a family from another racial group?

We asked every small group to do four compassion projects locally each year?

We focused on life transformation more than programming?

We did less programming so people could develop relationships with each other and unbelievers?

We read through the Bible as a congregation every other year - the whole thing?

We challenged people to see people as God sees them and love them as He loves them - starting with one another?

We became known for the church that loves people and helps them in practical ways?

What would you add?

Simple concepts - Powerful outcomes

Facing down the giants in the church

I often think of the account in the Old Testament where Moses sent twelve spies into the land that would one day become their home. The vast majority of the spies came back and reported to the nation that "there are giants in the land" and that it would be impossible for them to prevail. Only two, Caleb and Joshua called on the nation to move forward, confident that God would help them overcome the giants (Numbers 13).

Church leaders face giants regularly which keep them from leading their congregations into greater health, more meaningful ministry and community impact. As I have consulted with numerous churches and leaders four of those giants stand out.

The giant of fear.

It is the fear of failure: we cannot do that! It is the fear that someone will object: they will! It is the fear that the money won't be there: not everything depends on money and there is more than most people believe! It is the fear of uncharged territory: uncharted territory requires courage!

It is interesting to me that the number one command in Scripture is "fear not." The reason for this is that fear is the killer of faith and faith is the currency of God's kingdom: "Without faith it is impossible to please God." The evil one is a purveyor of fear while God is a purveyor of faith. After all, we don't enter into any ministry endeavor on our strength but on the strength and power of God.

Jesus did not just give us the Great Commission but he reminded us that "He is with us always, even to the end of the age." Fearful leaders are no different from the ten spies who declared that to go in is to embark on a suicide mission. Fear is a giant, but not to God.

The giant of comfort.

Anytime leaders lead courageously they are taking themselves and their people out of their comfort zone. It is human nature to want to stay in ones comfort zone where life is predictable, where we are safe and feel that we can control outcomes and where our status quo is not messed with.

This is precisely why we have the saying, "Don't rock the boat." We like stability and comfort which is precisely why the church makes so little difference to its community or the world. Leaders are not immune to that comfort and followers generally love that comfort.

The job of leaders is not to keep people comfortable but to help them be all that they can be under Christ to fulfill the mission He left the church. Whenever we are comfortable we are in a danger zone and the longer we remain comfortable with what is the harder it will be to move out of that comfort zone into what should and could be.

The giant of change

How often do church leaders hear from someone in the congregation, "we've never done it that way!" How often do church leaders say the same thing when considering ministry initiatives. There is no forward movement in any organization without change but people are naturally change resistant, including many leaders.

We do not look at change for change sake. We look at change so that we can remain effective in a changing culture. The gospel does not change but strategies for reaching people does. This is not about chasing the latest ministry fad. It is about ensuring that our ministries are as effective as they can be so that we can fulfill the mission of the church.

Show me a church that has not changed much in the past decade and I will show you a church whose ministry is on a downward slope, its leaders still clinging to the past and its people comfortable in their familiar but unproductive territory.

The giant of conflict

Conflict is not all bad! In fact, I saw a book recently titled, "Every Congregation needs a little Conflict" and I agree with the title (not having read the book). Conflict makes people think and consider and evaluate.

There is always some kind of conflict when leaders face down the giants of fear, comfort and change because most people find change hard and some find it sinful, unnecessary and wrong. These are the "laggards" on the change scale, they hate change. We call them the "squeaky wheels" in the church who will squeak whenever change is suggested.

Even in the best congregation, conflict of some kind will happen with major ministry initiatives. It is normal, it is expected and it is inevitable. Real leaders listen, process people and lead with sensitivity but they are not cowed by the loud voices who make their opinions known - often in unhealthy ways.

Courageous, wise and missional leaders are hard to find. But that is what is needed in the church. Good leaders know there are giants that they will face as they lead, just as Caleb and Joshua did - they saw the same formidable people that the other ten saw. The difference between Joshua, Caleb and the other ten spies is that they also understood that if they followed God where He was leading them that they would prevail.

In God's strength, what look like giants to us are not to God. How is your leadership board doing in facing down the giants?

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Holy Discontent in the church

As I travel and talk to folks in congregations across the United States (and other countries) I am sensing a growing holy discontent with business as usual in the church. The discontent is not coming primarily from pastors and staff but from congregants. There are several themes that I am hearing.

"My pastor is not unpacking the Word of God and often substitutes self help preaching to God's word and its impact on my life." We who are in ministry don't like to hear this but it is a significant issue among those we minister to. I can read any number of thousands of self help books on the market today but our souls long for the living word of the living God that has "the power to penetrate even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart" (Hebrews 4:12).

There are many parched hearts and souls among our people who long for a better understanding of what God has and wants for them. If those of us in ministry doubt that all we need to do is to ask.

"I am relegated to the B team of ministry because I don't have formal theological education." Those of us in ministry have severely underestimated the pain among many of our leaders, women, and gifted folks in the church who are not empowered for real ministry. This is a direct violation of the responsibilities of church leaders to unleash their people in meaningful ministry (Ephesians 4:12). 

I am constantly amazed and saddened when qualified leaders are marginalized, not listened to or even sidelined because of the agendas of paid staff. There are churches who release exceedingly well but there are equally many who do not. Too many pastors are threatened by strong lay leaders.

We will never impact our communities until we help all of our people understand that they are on God's A team (He has only one team) and that they are the called ones in their community, neighborhood, workplace and circle of influence. In the early church it was the new converts who were God's workers and staff. In the majority world it is the same today. They cannot afford to hire staff to do it for them or staff that have formal degrees. We need to train, equip and deploy (Ephesians 4:12) so that all are engaged in the good works (Ephesians 2:10) that God created them for.

We have so professionalized ministry and equated ministry qualifications with education and degrees that we have lost the concept of raising up ministry leaders from within our own churches. Perhaps those of us who have the degrees are guilty of guarding our status in ministry but not allowing others in easily. After all, we are qualified, we have the education and we have the degree.

"I am tired of ministry without the power of the Holy Spirit. I long for the day when His spirit is alive and well in our midst and not just a theoretical entity." I hear this theme over and over. Truth without power is not alive. In the New Testament Paul often ties the word and power together, it is not one or the other or one without the other. While many people cannot put their finger on it, they know something is missing that they need for living out the Christian life in their own lives. I am watching groups of ordinary people start prayer ministries in their congregations and among people from other congregations who are also looking for greater power and presence of the Holy Spirit.

I would not just call this discontent but a holy discontent. It is discontent that God's spirit is raising up to create a healthier church and a more biblical church. Those of us in ministry need to hear, listen and consider the holy discontent that is emerging in the church today.

Herding cats and congregational alignment

Congregations are effective to the extent that their people are moving in the same general direction. When leaders have a direction and can mobilize their people in that direction, there is great power. When leaders don’t have a direction or people don’t know the direction, or there has not been significant effort to herd the cats in that direction, mission suffers.

It is not easy to herd cats and it is not easy to get a group of people pointed in the same direction. But it is possible and wise leaders work on making it happen. Here are some basic tips in how to make that happen in your church.

Clarify the basics. 
Leaders need to have clarity before they can communicate clarity. They need clarity around four key areas. One, what is our mission? Two, what are our guiding principles or the non-negotiables for how we do what we do and relate to one another? Three, what is the single most important thing we need to focus on (central ministry focus)? Four, what do we want the end result of our ministry to look like (spiritual vitality)?

Leaders, pastors and staff must have a common set of commitments and a common vocabulary around these four core issues so that they can communicate them consistently and clearly with the congregation.

Communicate constantly. You cannot over communicate the basics. While we may get tired of hearing ourselves saying them, it is in the constant communication of what is truly important that people start to assimilate those beliefs. People crave clarity and good leaders provide the clarity on a regular basis. If you can communicate those key issues in a simple, clear and consistent manner, people will start to remember them.

Be upfront with new members and attenders.
The reference point for what church is or should be for people who have had prior church experience is some church in their past. They often come into a new church thinking that your church will be like some past church. It won’t in all likelihood. Use new member classes or informal gatherings of new attenders to communicate who you are, what your commitments are and what your direction is. Clarify the four issues noted earlier.

This is important if you truly want your culture to reflect your mission, guiding principles, central ministry focus and end result. The fact is that you do not want people importing values that are inconsistent with who you are or want to be. Not all churches fit all people. Be clear as to who you are and what people can expect in their experience in your congregation.

Ensure that every ministry in the church is communicating the same thing. You will either lose alignment or gain alignment depending on whether every one of your ministry leaders and key volunteers is communicating the same message. For instance, all staff, volunteers and ministry leaders need to know those things that you are clear on regarding mission, guiding principles, central ministry focus and the end goal of your ministries - and have a plan for how they will communicate them in their particular ministry. If all ministry leaders communicate and live out the same message – it will get through.

Use small groups to focus the congregation on key ministries. 
Small groups can either align or miss-align a congregation depending on whether there is a strategy to ensure that leaders are paying attention to the key ministry commitments of the congregation. For instance, one should ensure that every small group is intentionally helping people move toward a common definition of spiritual maturity – depending on how your church as defined maturity. Or, if community involvement is key to your ministry, every small group should have a plan for how they will contribute to community ministry.

All small group leaders should have the same understanding, commitment to and concern for the mission, guiding principles, central ministry focus and the desired end result of ministry. If they do not have the same commitment as staff and leaders, the cats will not be moving in the same direction.

Develop your "way"
Executives from around the world pay big bucks to attend Disney seminars on the “Disney Way.” It is the way that the Disney Company does business, treats employees and the unique culture they espouse. Every church ought to have “a way” or a culture that defines it that is inculcated into every staff member, every board member, every volunteer or key ministry leader – and then into the congregation as a whole.

Your way includes the culture you want to create (guiding principles), the mission you exist for, the desired end result of your ministry (spiritual vitality) and the central ministry focus – the developing, empowering and releasing of people into active, meaningful ministry.

This also includes a common vocabulary that is spoken in your hallways, the living out of your preferred culture and a consistent message over time. Done well, you will develop your unique culture and the cats will move generally in the same direction.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

The unique fingerprint of your church

God's creativity is amazing. With 7 billion people on our planet, no two fingerprints are alike. No two people are alike.

And, no two congregations are alike. But too often we try to make "our ministry" look like "another ministry," because we like the "success" of that ministry. The problem is that you cannot clone congregations. And when one tries, we lose the uniqueness that God built into that particular congregation. Leaders who try to emulate someone else's ministry not only are chasing an impossible dream but they are denying the uniqueness that God intentionally built into their church.

Plastic surgeons get patients all the time who want to change something so that they can look like some celebrity who is rated as the picture of what a beautiful person should look like. They are chasing a dream that is not real. And, usually not necessary.

Church leaders do it as well - by trying to become something they are not. Just as people chase a dream with plastic surgery - when they use it to emulate someone else - so church leaders can be caught in the same trap.

Success for every congregation is living out the Great Commandment and serving the Great Commission. It is not found in the particular program, music style or the number of people we can gather on a particular weekend.

The fingerprint of a congregation is a unique blend of its ministry philosophy, history, geography and neighborhood, the gifting of its people, its vision, and the gifting of its leaders. And, because of its unique fingerprint, God will use it in unique ways. In fact, it is in a diversity of ministries that the church will be most effective and reach the broadest swath of people.

If we can celebrate diversity of ethnicities and the uniqueness of each individual, why cannot we celebrate the diversity of congregations: large, small, in-between, house church, cell church, ethnic, traditional, non-traditional, seeker driven, seeker sensitive, inner city, suburban, rural, high church, low church, or just church!

We ought to be all that God made us to be and maximize our unique potential and commit to health, honoring Christ, becoming like Christ, living out the Great Commandment and committed to the Great Commission. And celebrate the unique opportunity that God has given us as a congregation.

God would be delighted if:

We could learn from one another but not try to be one another.

We would celebrate one another's ministry and not covet the unique mandate of another church.

In our success we would not assume that other ministries should look like us - leadership hubris.

We would gladly cooperate with one another and not be threatened by one another.

We humbly claimed our place in ministry and maximized our opportunity as a congregation.

He would be delighted because he has given every congregation a unique fingerprint. Celebrate it. Maximize its uniqueness. Don't try to be someone God did not make you to be.

I am privileged to work with many different kinds of churches. I am always amazed at the creativity and passion of healthy leaders and the unique ways they are making a difference for Christ. I learn something new with every church I consult with. It is in our uniqueness that we are effective, learn new ways of reaching people, innovate and reach those God has called us to reach.

Church leadership and trust

Inherent in the American system of government is a basic mistrust of people who hold authority or responsibility. This mistrust runs deep through our psyche as a people. Once, I did a consultation for a church of 2,000 in Madison, Wisconsin that was changing its bylaws. The senior pastor offered some perspective on the culture surrounding his church: "What you have to understand is that in this community, there is huge mistrust of anyone in authority. Everyone here wants to be in on decisions because they don't trust leaders."

Unfortunately, those attitudes often carry over into our churches. But the church is not the local government, and healthy leaders in the church are to be trustworthy and followed. The writer of Hebrews goes so far as to say, "Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you (Hebrews 13:17)."

The New Testament clearly vests the senior leadership of the church with authority and responsibility in the context of a leadership for which they are ultimately accountable to God.

Ironically, when church governance is established as a checks-and-balances system, mistrust is not only built-in but is also actively fostered. The very basis of the governance system of checks and balances implies that we should question and limit one another. When authority is meted out to different groups, in the best-case scenario there is the opportunity for misunderstanding; in the worst-case scenario there is outright conflict. Here, you not only have tollbooths that decisions must pass through, but you also have the added frustration of dealing with mistrusting tollkeepers!

The church needs to see a new renaissance of trust among its people. Trust between paid staff members and boards, between boards and congregations, and between congregations and staff teams. We need to teach our people that trust is a biblical concept unless it has been violated. When violated, we need to work hard to restore it.

A mistrust of each other may reflect our society, but it does not reflect our theology.

Ezra's and Nehemiah's: We need one another

A common theme I hear from highly qualified business people and other professionals today is "Why won't the church let me use my gifts in its ministry?" Many feel marginalized and underutilized. Some feel like they are not wanted at all on the ministry side.

Not that they are not allowed to minister. Ministry folks are often glad to let professional folks minister in ministry slots they have created that they need to be filled. That is not what these professionals are asking. They want to be able to use the skills God has given them in ministry - not filling slots the church has created!

Many ministry professionals lack experience and gifting in leadership, business, strategy and management. They don't like to admit it but it is true.

Many professionals lack experience in preaching, teaching, counseling or theological intricacies.

Perhaps given those facts, we need each other! Playing to each other's strengths and complementing one another. Actually making room for each other and not being threatened by one another.

Ezra was a spiritual leader and a good one. He was terrible as a leader or administrator! So God provided Nehemiah who did not pretend to be a priest, but who had amazing administrative and leadership gifts and who got done in a short time what Ezra could not get done in years. They needed each other, they played to their strengths and the people were stronger for it.

Ezra was a priest. Nehemiah was an executive of the king. Ezra's and Nehemiah's need each other. Too often they have not found a way to work well with each other. The church is the purview of the Ezra's and the world of the Nehemiah's.

We need the Ezra's and Nehemiah's in our churches to appreciate one another, trust one another and allow one another to play to the strengths God has given. Our congregations might, like the people of Israel in Nehemiah actually be better off because of it.

Empowering pastors

One of the most disempowering issues for senior pastors are boards that want to second guess much of what they do - or require them to ask permission before they can act. Frequently, churches are permission withholding rather than permission granting and many senior pastors chafe under controlling boards. 

It need not be the case and in fact controlling boards actually slow down and hinder ministry rather than facilitate it. So how does a board empower their senior leader - and therefore their staff - and still ensure that adequate safeguards are in place for the organization?

One simple solution is for boards and their senior leader to sit down and delineate those thing that the leader must do and those things that the leader cannot do without board assent. In policy governance used by many boards these are called executive limitations - the limits put on the senior leader by the board. Aside from those limitations, the senior leader is free to act with "reasonable interpretation" and make decisions as they see fit. 

By putting these into policies the senior leader knows what his or her limits are and are free to make decisions consistent with the ministry vision of the church without needing to run all of those decisions by the board - a redundancy that makes for inefficient ministry. Policies that make sense in one stage of a church's life may not make sense in another and these limitations can be either relaxed or tightened depending on the need. It also clarifies which issues are management issues delegated to the senior leader and which issues are board issues so that there is no longer confusion around responsibility and authority - a common issue in church governance. 

Often in working with boards, someone will ask the question, "But what if we don't trust that our senior leader will make the right decision." The question is either about trust or about competency and if the question needs to be asked there are other issues that the board and senior leader need to work on. Often a board member is simply not willing to allow the senior leader the latitude to do their job as they want to control not empower.

It is always amusing to me to see the competencies that churches look for when hiring a senior pastor and then the lack of empowerment they give this individual who they believe matches those competencies. Pastoral work is hard enough without a board second guessing everything that one does. Clarifying what the expectations are and then giving maximum freedom outside those limitations is one of the greatest gifts a board can give their leader.

Seven indicators of a healthy organization

Leaders are always looking for the magic bullet to differentiate their organization from others and give themselves an edge. Often, they end up chasing the wrong things. In fact, the key to a great organization is pretty simple: they focus on health. This is the opposite of a toxic workplace which is unfortunately more common than we wish.

What are the signs of a healthy organization?

One: They have great clarity about what they are about. There is no ambiguity regarding their mission, their guiding principles, what they need to focus on and what they desire to accomplish. Because of this clarity, the whole organization is on the same page and are moving in the same direction.

Two: They have a candid and trusting culture where there are no elephants (issues that cannot be discussed) and where honest dialogue is valued and expected. Unhealthy organizations shut down candid and robust dialogue as a threat. Healthy organizations encourage and expect it knowing that the only way to better solutions is honesty. This can only happen in a culture of trust which is the ground from which such honest dialogue emerges.

Three: They empower people to make necessary decisions within well defined boundaries. Controlling organizations stifle creativity and are permission withholding cultures. Healthy organizations encourage creativity and empower people as permission granting cultures. Unhealthy organizations control people through rules while healthy organizations empower people through well defined clarity (one above). Healthy organizations trust their staff while unhealthy organizations control their staff.

Four: They treat people with dignity. Great organizations are places people love to work because they value their staff and live that value in all relationships. Every organization says that their people are their most valuable asset but most organizations do not live out their stated value. Treating people with dignity means that staff are trusted, empowered, their opinions valued, failure is not fatal but a learning opportunity, and staff are regularly developed to maximize their potential. 

Five: They care about real results. Of course every organization says it cares about results but the truth is that in the ministry world very few actually have ways to measure results which means we are not truly serious! Healthy organizations have great clarity and are focused on living out that clarity for tangible results that they measure and evaluate. Healthy organizations can easily answer the question "How do you measure success?" Can yours?

Six: They constantly develop their staff. Toxic organizations use people while healthy organizations develop and grow people on a regular basis. They create a culture where emotional, relational, spiritual and skill health is both an expectation and something that is constantly growing. Healthy organizations are made up of healthy people so any focus on health must start with staff. 

Seven: They are humble. Humble organizations continue to grow because they know they have many areas where they can grow. Proud organizations actually hurt themselves by their pride. They think they have a corner on ministry and are superior to others. Great organizations take a humble posture with humble leaders and staff whose humility allows them to continually evaluate how they can do what they do better. Humility breeds a servant mentality while pride does not.

How does the organization you lead or are a part of compare to these seven indicators of health?

Church vision must go beyond the Senior Pastor

I met recently with the leaders of a church who have just lost their senior pastor. They had three questions for me they wanted to discuss with the group. "Who are we?; "What do we do?" and "Where are we going?" in light of their Senior Pastor's leaving.

I told them that two of the three questions were easy because they as a leadership group along with their former pastor has clearly identified who they were and where they were headed with a sandbox! In other words, they had done the hard work of getting to clarity about God's call on their congregation and the fact that their senior pastor had left had not changed the equation. In fact, they had what any potential senior pastor would want to know - who are you and where are you headed? The question of what do we do now (in the interim) was the only issue they needed to discuss.

The direction of a church should not be dependent on who the senior leader is. They certainly have huge influence in charting it but every church has a DNA and a unique call from God which it must figure out and pursue. Leaders who do the hard work of identifying what God's call is on their congregation are not left directionless when a senior leadership transition takes place. It is the lack of such clarity that causes congregations to take huge swings in direction when leadership transitions take place.

Something to think about if you are a church leader!

I love messy churches because they minister to messy people and bring restoration to messy lives

I love messy churches. Churches where there is transparency about where we actually are in life. Churches that welcome people who are screwed up, hurting, poor, criminal (imagine that), pregnant out of wedlock, people with prison records, who are marginalized, divorced, abused, addicted, and hopeless. Maybe people with tattoos, piercings, different color hair and grunge  clothing. Now that is the kind of church I want to be a part of.

I strongly suspect that Jesus would be in that kind of church judging from the company he kept back in His day. Actually, I think it was by intention. He knew where the receptive people were - generally not the well off, educated and professional (and I fit that profile), but the desperate and screwed up (all of us fit that profile in one way or another).

Where are those kinds of people welcome? The truth is that they are often not welcome. How can they be in congregations that are so concerned about outward appearances of "having it all together" that the utter lack of transparency about the struggles they have send a strong signal that "we are not like you."

Funny thing is that they actually are, they just don't want to admit it. Behind our masks of respectability are people whose marriages are struggling, kids who are struggling, hidden addictions that are destroying lives and families, unresolved anger, broken relationships, financial problems and all kinds of messy stuff. So why don't we just admit it and no longer pretend?

I know churches like that. Here is what I notice about them. First they are filled with people who are messed up and who get cleaned up. Second, because they are willing to be transparent about the mess that God cleaned up, others who are messed up know they are welcome. Third, there is a lot of grace for one another because we are not pretending that we have been or perhaps still are not messed up and in need of God's grace and the love of others.

Some churches pretend to live in the "Leave it to Beaver" world of respectability, apple pie, perfect families and "together people." What I believe is that it is a facade, not reality. What I know is that even if it were true, those who don't fit that profile won't be welcome. And they would be those most desperate for help and love and answers and spiritual renovation. Jesus said, I did not come for the healthy but for the sick.

I am always amused by parents who are concerned that their kids perfect youth group will be destroyed by the attitudes, language or behavior of kids from the local school. Excuse me? I thought the good news of the gospel is for the hurting and messed up? I know of adult small groups where a pagan who does not know any better actually tells the truth about their lives and they are met with a pregnant silence (what do we do with someone like that in our church). Excuse me? I thought the good news of the gospel was for people like that.

The very fascination with excellence and perfection in many churches today - from the building to the stage to the programming to the kinds of people we hold up are all at odds with the messiness, pain, dysfunction and bad stuff in the very people we want to reach out to - if we actually do. I suspect that there are churches who have no desire to reach out to people like that. They would not say it but they do say it - loudly with their culture and lack of transparency.

I vote with Jesus. Give me the messy church any day. I am not fascinated with perfection, I am wanting to live with the messy (I am one of those) and I want to help messed up people find help. Leave it to Beaver was a TV show. I want to live in the real world among real people who together want to be transformed into His image.

Tod Agnew, the musician got it right I think. Consider his words.Which Jesus do you follow?
Which Jesus do you serve?
If Ephesians says to imitate Christ
Then why do you look so much like the world?

Cause my Jesus bled and died
He spent His time with thieves and liars
He loved the poor and accosted the arrogant
So which one do you want to be?

Blessed are the poor in spirit
Or do we pray to be blessed with the wealth of this land
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst for righteousness
Or do we ache for another taste of this world of shifting sand

Cause my Jesus bled and died for my sins
He spent His time with thieves and sluts and liars
He loved the poor and accosted the rich
So which one do you want to be?

Who is this that you follow
This picture of the American dream
If Jesus was here would you walk right by on the other side or fall down and worship at His holy feet

Pretty blue eyes and curly brown hair and a clear complexion
Is how you see Him as He dies for Your sins
But the Word says He was battered and scarred
Or did you miss that part
Sometimes I doubt we'd recognize Him

Cause my Jesus bled and died
He spent His time with thieves and the least of these
He loved the poor and accosted the comfortable
So which one do you want to be?

Cause my Jesus would never be accepted in my church
The blood and dirt on His feet might stain the carpet
But He reaches for the hurting and despises the proud
I think He'd prefer Beale St. to the stained glass crowd
And I know that He can hear me if I cry out loud

I want to be like my Jesus!
I want to be like my Jesus!
I want to be like my Jesus!
I want to be like my Jesus!

Not a posterchild for American prosperity, but like my Jesus
You see I'm tired of living for success and popularity
I want to be like my Jesus but I'm not sure what that means to be like You Jesus
Cause You said to live like You, love like You but then You died for me
Can I be like You Jesus?
I want to be like you Jesus!
I want to be like my Jesus!

Should a church be run like a business?

Often when I work with church boards to clean up crazy making governance systems someone will be concerned that we are moving to run the church like a business. How does one answer that question when we know that a church is not a business?

The first part of the answer goes to the job description of elders (or the senior leadership board of a church). Unlike a business, their job is laid out in Scripture: Ensuring that the congregation is taught well, cared for, released into ministry, protected, and led in healthy directions. And, they have a ministry of prayer for the church (often not practiced much as they are so busy doing management stuff). So, the focus of their work is very different than is the bottom line of a business - adequate profits.

The second part of the answer is that the reason business organizes itself in efficient ways is to maximize their effectiveness and minimize the waste of time and energy. This ought to be true of church boards as well. Any governance system that helps us do what we do better for the sake of the mission of the church makes sense. The simple principle is that how we do what we do matters and our way of doing board work should serve what we are trying to get done.

Think of the issues faced by many church boards:

• Inability to make decisions in a timely manner.
• Long board meetings
• Revisiting decisions multiple times
• Lack of clarity on what is staff responsibility and board responsibility
• Not enough time to prayer and thinking as time is eaten up by administrative issues
• Preponderance of day to day management issues robbing the board of time to think about the future
• Lack of clarity as to where the church should be going
• Board members who hold up the process or violate board practices
• Lack of clarity on what the board is supposed to be doing
• Inability to move through agendas in a timely manner

All of these kinds of things are time and energy wasters which ultimately hurt the ability of the leadership to lead well and which ultimately hurts the ministry of the church. So, how well a board manages itself, creates systems for its work has a direct impact on the ministry effectiveness or lack of it for the entire congregation.

Thus my answer to the question to should we run a church like a business is no and yes. The no is that the job of elders is different than business leaders. The yes is that the governance systems may well look like those in a business because they are simply good practices that help you achieve what you want to achieve. Those good practices actually help you do what God has called you to do as leaders well. 

When business is not led well they go out of business. When churches are not led well they plateau and go into decline. How we lead matters in both business and ministry settings. We change our leadership practices in churches in order to maximize our ministry effectiveness. What we do in ministry is very different than in business. How we do it may look very much like how we do it in business.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Choosing the right leaders in your church: You get what you choose!

This is the time of the year that many congregations choose leaders for their congregation. Whether it is called the Leadership Board, Church Council, Deacons or by some other name the quality of those you choose will in large part determine the health of your church and ministry in the years to come. 

This is not an area to take lightly or to compromise. Churches get what they deserve when it comes to choosing leaders - for better or for worse. In fact it takes only one bad choice to poison a whole board - or to keep the board tied up in trying to deal with the individual rather than on missional issues.

I believe that he New Testament spells out six core responsibilities of leaders for the church and these responsibilities have a significant bearing on who we choose to lead. If they are not qualified to do these things you need to think again. 

The six responsibilities of church leaders are:

1. To keep the spiritual temperature high
2. To ensure the congregation is well taught
3. To ensure that the congregation is protected from heresy, division and ongoing serious and unrepentant sin
4. To ensure the congregation is cared for
5. To ensure that people are developed, empowered and released in meaningful ministry (inside and outside of the church)
6. To ensure that the congregation is led well in missional ministry

If those are the six key responsibilities of church leaders what are the personal profile of a good church leader. If we look at the New Testament for its explicit and implicit statements on the matter we see 13 non-negotiable characteristics of a good church leader.

1. They exhibit a Godly Character and lifestyle
2. They have a deep passion for Jesus
3. They exhibit personal humility
4. They love people
5. They are life long learners
6. They agree with God's leadership assignment for church leaders
7. They are able or willing to grapple with the future
8. They are team focused
9. They are a willing leader
10. They have positive influence on others
11. They are purveyors of hope
12. They have a action bias
13. They have good Emotional Intelligence

In case you wonder where #13 comes from in the New Testament - it is implied as you cannot fulfill many of the other characteristics without good Emotional Intelligence.

Remember, it takes only one bad apple on a board to destroy a board's effectiveness. Every board should have a job description including qualifications and a board covenant that spells out how the board operates. The health of the board will be directly reflected in the health of the church. Be clear about what you want in board members and focus a great deal of attention on building a healthy board team.

See these articles as well:

Operate without a board covenant at your risk

Signs of a dysfunctional church board

Rethinking leadership selection for the church

Church culture trumps everything!

I had an interesting conversation with a pastor recently who said to me, "Church culture trumps everything including Scripture and my preaching." He pastors a church that has been around for many years and his comment reflects the truth that the longer a church is in existence, the stronger its culture - for good or bad.

Most church cultures are not intentional but rather the influence of its founders, pastors, history, power dynamics, and a host of other factors. The culture usually includes some deeply held values (not the ones written down) that dictate how it operates. In one church I attended, for instance, one of the deeply held values and practices was not to resolve conflict but rather to ignore issues and hope they went away. It was part of the culture and didn't work out too well!

Church cultures can be exegeted and understood. In my book, High Impact Church Boards I suggest a number of questions to explore that can help you understand your congregation's genetic code.

• What do you know about the founding of your church? How do you think the motives and attitudes present in the church's founding - positive or negative - affect the church today?
• What was the philosophy of those who started your congregation? Is it the same today, or has there been a significant shift in mission, vision, or ministry philosophy? How did this shift happen?
• How do people in the church navigate disagreements? Would you give your congregation high or low marks for handling conflict? Do you see patterns here?
• Are you aware of any significant unresolved issues within your congregation? What are they, and why do you think they have not been resolved?
• How would you evaluate the unity of your leadership board? Does your board have a history of unity and love, even when faced with differences, or is there a history of conflict and broken relationships?
• If your congregation faced significant periods of conflict in the past, what do you know about these periods? Is it possible to see trends in either the causes or how the conflict was handled?
• When you consider leadership, now or historically, who has the major influence? Does the church board allow any individual (elected leaders or nonelected persons of influence) veto power over decisions made by the board or congregation? How has the power and influence structure of the church changed over the years?
• Think about the major changes the congregation has made, whether related to ministry philosophy, location, ministries or staff. Does the congregation respond to suggested changes easily, with great resistance - or somewhere in between?
• Are there any subjects, people or situations related to the ministry of your church that are off-limits for discussion? If so, why do you think these "elephants in the room" cannot be named? (High Impact Church Boards, pp. 81-82).

Once one understands the dynamics that made the church what it is in terms of culture, it is possible to craft a preferred culture that is intentional, rather than accidental. Every organization has a culture. The question is whether it was intentionally designed or "just is" as an aggregate of many factors in the past. If you are a church leader, are you able to define the culture of your church and the influences behind that culture? 

Chapters 2, 3 and 4 of the companion book, Leading From the Sandbox describe a paradigm for designing an intentional, healthy, God honoring church or organizational culture and how to make it a reality. While existing cultures are deeply embedded, as my pastor friend suggested, it is possible to change and modify church cultures with intentionality in the process. Not only is it possible but necessary if the church is going to be everything God designed it to be.

The single greatest ministry accelerator: It is not what you think!

The single greatest ministry accelerator is overlooked by many leaders. It is not a great strategy. It is not working harder or doing more. It is not having the right people (although that is important). It is not a charismatic leader (and does not require one). It does not require money. 

It is clarity! 

Many leaders miss this and expend a lot of energy in the wrong places. Getting to clarity is the single greatest accelerator of ministry there is. But it requires time, careful thought and constant reinforcement. It is actually the most important thing a leader does - or fails to do.

Lack of clarity leaves personnel to their own devices to figure out what is important, and different individuals will come up with different answers leaving the organization without a focused, aligned ministry. General focus yields general results with general accountability and general effectiveness.

Without maximum clarity, an organization will never have integration or alignment (around what?), will not attract the best people who want to know what they are giving their lives to, will not know when they have achieved success (what results are we seeking?) and leaders will not know how to intentionally lead their teams (toward what?) or have a clear means of making key directional decisions.

It is not necessarily an easy task to achieve clarity but getting there is the single most powerful accelerator to ministry results and organizational alignment. While a leader must take responsibility for helping the organization get to clarity, it is essential that the key stakeholders (boards and key leaders depending on the structure of the organization) take part in the process and are in complete agreement.

Without clarity one cannot lead well. With clarity, your leadership becomes much easier because there is focus and common direction for you, your team and the organization. Maximum clarity changes the leadership and organizational equation in a huge way.

The four areas were maximum clarity are crucial are these:

Clarity on mission: what we ultimately are committed to accomplishing.

Clarity on guiding principles: how we are committed to working.

Clarity on the central ministry focus: what we need to do every day - and do it well to accomplish our mission.

Clarity on the culture of the organization: An intentionally created culture that makes it possible to accomplish your mission.

If you have not gotten to clarity you may want to look at chapters 2,3, and 4 of Leading From the Sandbox. There is a path laid out there that can help you.

If Jesus wrote an eighth letter to the churches in Revelation and it was yours, what would He say?

It is clear from Revelation two and three that Jesus evaluates churches as well as individuals. In the seven letters to seven churches He speaks positively of some traits and negatively of others and calls them to a higher commitment to their original calling.

This latter point is important. The vision and commitment that churches have at the start often strays over time. Passion for Jesus can fade and be replaced by other things - even programs and numbers. Or, just busyness and a focus on ourselves rather than on Gospel expansion and transformation.

Here is a great question for church staff and leadership boards: If Jesus were writing a letter to your church today as he wrote to the churches in Revelation, what do we believe He would say to you? Write it down and consider sharing it with the congregation. What would He commend you for? What would He call you to? What would He candidly talk to you about?

Congregations are the local expression of the Bride of Christ. We have areas of strength and obedience where we do well. We have areas of weakness and even disobedience where we do poorly. An honest look at both could change the trajectory of your ministry - in the eyes of God.

It would make for a great discussion, some celebration and perhaps some adjustments.