Transparency in leadership

Leaders are often reluctant to be candid about their own struggles and their shadow side, thinking that those they lead will think less of them for revealing their own mistakes and failures. Ironically, if you ask those they lead if they think less of them or more of them for doing so the answer is invariably "more!"

Why? first because those we lead know we are not without our own struggles and in fact, they have probably experienced our shadow side from time to time. Second, our transparency is a sign of something that those we lead value highly: authenticity. To pretend we don't have similar struggles to others is inauthentic and to allow others to put us on a pedestal is dangerous because the pedestal will fall. What people want in a leader is authentic character without pretence. Pretence is a lie and it reveals lack of integrity.

Third, our transparency invites those we lead to join us on a journey toward greater wholeness, maturity and personal growth. I cannot challenge others to grow if there is not evidence of growth in my own life. The first step in growth is acknowledging the need and it is authentic, transparent, humble individuals who acknowledge their need. Pride does not acknowledge need for growth either to ourselves or to others. And it is deadly to ministry organizations where humility is a prerequisite for true service. Humble, transparent leaders grow humble, transparent teams.

The ability to be transparent comes out of true introspection regarding our own lives - the good and bad - and an attitude that we have nothing to prove to others and nothing to lose by being honest. What we fear we will lose (respect) is ironically what we gain. More importantly, however, we grow a team that does not live with pretence but with authenticity. When leaders choose to be authentic others will. When leaders choose pretence, others do the same.

None of us can relate to perfect people since that is not the reality we live with. Thus if leaders want those they lead to relate to them they will choose transparency over pretence. I love the advice Paul gave to Timothy in 1 Timothy 4:15 - "Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress." The greatest example we can be to others is that they can see the progress of growth in our own lives.

The Privilege of Persecution

I spoke yesterday to a group of church leaders and pastors from across India on the subject of ministering from a posture of weakness (my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness) from 2 Corinthians 12:7-10. At the conclusion I asked for their response and heard some amazing stories of persecution, suffering and God's intervention. These men and women of faith understand what it means to minister from weakness and to share in the sufferings of Christ.

In one instance a church planter told about being surrounded by radical Hindu's on a road where he was travelling by bicycle. He had on him a Bible and some tracts. The men asked him what he was carrying and he told them, "I have the gospel of Jesus for you." They told him they were going to kill him and he said, "Before your do so, you need to know which God I am serving," and handed them a tract. His comment - coming with the lack of fear that they expected scared them and they quickly backed off and left him alone. The pastor said, "They were scared and I was calm." God was obviously with him.

The church in the west knows virtually nothing about the privilege of sharing in the suffering of Christ because of our faith but we ought to be praying for those who experience it day in and day out. These men and women are my heroes. They have nothing to gain by what they do and everything to lose but they live day to day trusting God for their very food and protection. And He shows himself to be faithful in small and large ways.

Recently I wrote an endorsement for a new book entitled, The Privilege of Persecution. It is a must read for those in missions, for mission supporters and for those who care about the global church. It opens our eyes to the realities of serving God in most places on the planet where persecution is a reality but it is a book of hope as one reads stories like the one above of men and women who not only endure suffering for the cause of Christ but count it a privilege. Do we?

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Hearts of compassion

Whenever I travel in the majority world I ask to be taken to the poorest section in town. Here in Ahmedabad, India I don't need to ask - just look out the window of my four star hotel in two directions and I see how half of the population of this city lives. It is a graphic reminder of the privilege we have of decent shelter, good food, clean water and bathrooms - none of which are present in these slums.

Virtually the only groups who bring hope to such populations are Christians who share out of the little they have with those who have less. One couple I met yesterday illustrates that commitment. He is a church planter among the poor. She is a PhD in the subject of the empowerment of poor tribal women in India and both have passed up what would be lucrative jobs with their education to work among the least of these: he planting churches and she running a school for tribal children who would otherwise have no education. When I asked them what brought them the greatest joy they smiled and said, "when someone responds to the gospel."

Travel in the majority (poor) world raises serious questions for those of us who live with great wealth in comparison. Consider the fact that 54% of our world lives on less than three USD per day and 91% lives on less than 10,000 USD per year. If one has a combined family income of $100,000 per year or more we are in the top one half of one percent of wealth in the world. A startling statistic for those of us who don't consider ourselves wealthy. Yet a glance out of my dirty hotel window tells me that I am very wealthy indeed.

The question this raises for me is the portion of my giving that ought to go toward the worlds poor. Not in creating welfare like dependencies but in supporting Christian ministries that seek to both share the gospel and help those caught in a cycle of poverty. The school run by my friends mentioned above gives children an opportunity through education to get out of the poverty that has been the plight of their families for generations. And, to find hope in Jesus Christ as they are given a truly Christian education. As their lives change, parents start to ask why and they too are introduced to the gospel.

Having travelled in fifty plus countries and seen the world for what it is and having been exposed to countless heroes of Jesus who work in difficult circumstances, my goal is to see at least 25% of my giving targeted for Biblical compassion - where the gospel is shared, dignity is restored, and people have an opportunity to be lifted out of their poverty. Yes, the poor will always be among us but like Jesus who gave great attention to the poor, our hearts should break at the circumstances that so many find themselves in.

We think nothing of spending millions of dollars on our church facilities with all the excellence and technology we can cram in. All wonderful. But do we have the same commitment to those who have literally nothing and where $50,000 is like a million in what it can do? This not about guilt for what God has given. Rather it is about having the heart of God with those who have almost nothing.

Have you thought about strategically targeting a percentage of your giving toward Biblical compassion? The difference it will make is huge and eternal.

Ten marks of ego driven leaders

In an ironic twist from the humble and servant leadership of Christ there are many in Christian leadership in the church and elsewhere (lay and professional) who are driven more by ego and personal success than by a desire to see the Gospel advanced. The Gospel becomes the means by which personal success is achieved rather than the Gospel being the primary objective of their leadership. As a psychologist lamented to me recently, "Why are there so many ego driven and narcissistic leaders in Christian ministry?"

What are the signs of ego driven ministry?

First, it is obvious to those around ego driven leaders that it is about "them" and that the relentless drive for better and bigger is about their leader's success rather than the accomplishment of the mission or serving their team.

Second, ego driven leaders often drive their staff rather than serving and growing their staff as they are the means to their success. When staff feel used, it is a sign that this is about the leader rather than about the mission.

Third, ego driven leaders take credit for success and blame others for failure. They may not do this overtly (that would not look good) but they find ways to inflate their own effectiveness and deflect responsibility for failures.

Fourth, ego driven leaders often exaggerate the actual results of their ministries. Any time the stated results don't match the actual results there is eqo inflation going on. This is ubiquitous in missions!

Fifth, ego driven leaders don't empower their staff but rather control them. After all, it is about them and they want to ensure that it stays about them. Empowerment means giving responsibility, authority and therefore credit for results away.

Sixth, ego driven leaders don't often cooperate with other ministries. If it is not their idea it is not worthy of pursuing. They guard the ability to say "we did this," or "this was our idea."

Seventh, ego driven leaders are highly territorial. There is competition with other ministries as if there were a limited amount of gospel results to be had. Further, they actually believe that they have a corner on the market of how they do what they do.

Eighth, the actions and attitudes of ego driven leaders often do not match their spiritual language. Outsiders may not know the gap but insiders are well aware and the gap breeds cynicism.

Ninth, ego driven leaders give little attention to the contributions of other people to the cause of the kingdom. Their attention, focus and energy is all focused on themselves and their ministry. When talking about other ministries they often find subtle ways to denigrate the strategy and results of others. The putting down of others allows them to inflate themselves.

Tenth, ego driven leaders are not open to criticism, dialogue or feedback regarding their own behavior or leadership. Because it is about them they are not open to the feedback of others if is deemed critical. There is a high defensive mechanism. This means that strong leaders around them do not last long because their input is not welcome. Those who will cater to their egos, however, are always welcome.

My advice for those who work for ego driven leaders? Consider finding another leader to work for whose true focus is the advancement of the kingdom rather than the advancement of themselves and their ego's. Why? because using the gospel as the advancement mechanism for ourselves is anathema to everything Jesus taught about leadership in His kingdom. It is never about us. It is always about Him. Something for every leader to think about.

Truth and Lies

"When does a lie begin?
     A lie, Rabbi Fajner would say, has no beginning. A lie runs downwards like a rootlet, branching an infinite number of times. But if you trace the rootlets down, you never find a moment of inspiration and vision, only overwhelming desperation and despair.
     A lie always begins with denial.
     Something has happened - yet you do not want to admit that it has.
     That is how a lie begins."
          From The Emperor of lies: A Novel

How true! and as we all know, how destructive. There is something pure and liberating and freeing in the truth while lies begin in desperation and despair and lead to great pain. No wonder truthfulness is part of God's character (and fullness of life) while lies are part of Satan's character and the diminishing of life (John 10:10). As Rabbi Fajner said, "If you trace the rootlets down, you never find a moment of inspiration and vision, only overwhelming desperation and despair.

Lies are sinful remnants of our lower nature that can be traced back to the "father of lies." They are destructive because they not only start us on a trial of lies (one lie births another and another and another by necessity) but in their telling we lose something precious in us (integrity which is based in truth) and when exposed something precious with others (trust which is based in truth). Our own inner cohesiveness, health and personal integrity are based on truth which is why those who live with lies live with inner turmoil and fractured hearts. Why do lies make us feel soiled? Because they are so antithetical to the character of God and they violate the dim reflection we still have of being made in his image.

A reading of Proverbs highlights how central truth is to the character of God. The more truth we speak to ourselves about who we are, what motives drive us, where our sinful tendencies lie and where our lives need reformation, the more like God we become. Speaking truth to ourselves is the precursor to speaking truth to others and those who lie to others have first lied to themselves. Where do lies start? They start in the heart by lying to ourselves.

Lies never start well because they start in the heart and they never end well because when our heart is revealed our integrity is gone. Even hidden they cause inner destruction because lying to ourselves and others erodes our inner lives. We know we have violated truth and nurturing that violation eats away at our soul. Truth wins in every way. Truth telling to ourselves and others brings us closer to God the father of truth. Telling lies to ourselves or others separates us from the father of truth and mirrors the father of lies.

The Lens through which we view life

It is fascinating to watch the lenses through which individuals see life. Some see the cup half full, others half empty. Some are by nature pessimists and some optimists. There are those who approach relationships with trust while others mistrust. When colleagues do something unhelpful, there are those who instantly assume ill motives and those who don't. These reactions are a reflection of our personality, our family of origin and experiences of life. All of us have a set of lenses that filter our view of life, people and situations and none of us has perfect vision but some have better vision than others. And, all of us can grow toward clearer and healthier lenses.

Part of our Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is understanding the default reactions we have to people and situations and to work on modifying or managing that default when we know it is not helpful or accurate. It is not unusual, for instance, when someone does something that irritates us to assume they had an ill motives in their actions. That default reaction is often incorrect and learning to withhold judgement until we understand why they did what they did is healthier EQ than drawing conclusions without the full information.

Think of how often married couples make assumptions about words or actions of their spouse that are not accurate but which cause friction or conflict because of assumptions we make. I plead guilty! Often our default reactions are faulty.

Our default reactions are particularly evident when we are under stress which brings out either the best or worst in us. How often we wish we could modify some of those reactions! Understanding what our default reactions are and what pushes our buttons toward those reactions that are unhelpful allows us to be aware and modify those reactions in the future.

Healthy individuals learn to be self aware of their default assumptions and reactions and to modify the unhealthy words, emotions and behaviors that those default reactions trigger. It is high self awareness coupled with the self discipline to respond more slowly, thoughtfully and wisely in those situations where we know we are at risk of responding poorly. I have learned for instance that keeping my emotions in check when someone pushes my buttons also keeps my responses in check but it has had to be learned and practiced.

Becoming aware of the lenses which we wear and the default reactions we have to people and situations gives us the opportunity to modify our attitudes and behaviors that are problematic. It is all about EQ - and personal growth.