Signs of Humility and Arrogance in leaders

 

Indicators of Humility

• I have a proper view of who I am and who I am not and know the source of my strengths

• I am a secure individual and, therefore, unthreatened

• I know that I need others and treat them with honor and respect

• As a rule, I am non-defensive

• I listen carefully to others and display flexibility

• I do not need to have my own way on most things

• I am willing to share authority and decision-making with others

• I intentionally solicit feedback and am open to critique

• I pay great attention to my shadow side and manage it

• I give credit away for success and take responsibility for failure

• I surround myself with people who will tell me the truth

• I live under authority and accountability

• I realize that my leadership is not about me but about the mission

Indicators of Arrogance

• I am self-involved and have an inflated view of my own importance

• I live with insecurity, which impacts my actions

• I use others for my purposes and marginalize them if they disagree with me

• I display defensiveness and do not want to hear contrary opinions

• I do not listen carefully to others and am inflexible when others suggest modifications to my plans

• I am unwilling to share decision-making with others

• I resist feedback or critique that is not in agreement with me

• I pay little attention to my shadow side and rarely, if ever, acknowledge it

• I take credit for success and blame others for failures

• I surround myself with “yes” people

• I resist accountability and chafe under authority

• The ministry is more about me than the mission

Another word for unteachability is arrogance

I am always fascinated when I meet people who are truly unteachable. I have come to the conclusion that they suffer from arrogance. If I am unwilling or unable to receive constructive feedback I am saying "I am right" rather than "tell me more." 

In talking to a senior pastor recently who was involved in significant conflict in his church centered around how he led, I asked him if he would do anything differently. He said "no!" I was amazed. I have never been in conflict where I would not do something different. What he said was that he stood for truth which by implication meant that everyone who saw issues in his leadership obviously did not. Where do you go from there. My guess is that he will take his same issues to his next leadership role because he is unwilling to admit there was anything he did wrong. Or even invite a conversation around it. When we don't learn from our tough times we take our issues to the next place of ministry.

Why are people sometimes unteachable? They are hanging on to pride and in their pride they become arrogant thinking they are always right. It is a dangerous place to be and the longer we live there the stronger our defenses become. Sometimes it takes a truly huge breaking before one becomes teachable. 

In the Christian world, arrogance can take on a spiritual quality. "Not only am I right but I have God on my side." In talking to the individual above I questioned some of his actions from a wisdom and discernment perspective. His answer, rather than at least having a conversation was "I am glad I will be judged by God and not by you." Not only was he not willing to at least explore my proposition but he implied that God would vindicate him. How do you dialogue over that?

One thing I loved about my dad was that while had very strong opinions he was also someone who always wanted to get better, always wanted to learn and grow. All of his degrees did not make him arrogant and unteachable.  I understand strong opinions, I have a few not having fallen far from the tree. But I want to be like him in this regard. It is why I try to live the best I can by a "nothing to prove and nothing to lose attitude." 

A humble individual is a teachable individual. They desire and appreciate constructive words that are meant for our good. A true sign of our humility is our teachable and a sign of our pride is the opposite. As we gain experience and success we need to remember that humility is teachability no matter how successful we are. 

TJ Addington (Addington Consulting) has a passion to help individuals and organizations maximize their impact and go to the next level of effectiveness. He can be reached at tjaddington@gmail.com.

"Creating cultures of organizational excellence."

12 signs of humility and arrogance in leaders

Indicators of Humility

• I have a proper view of who I am, who I am not and know the source of my strengths

• I am a secure individual and therefore unthreatened

• I know that I need others and treat them with honor and respect

• As a rule I am non-defensive

• I listen carefully to others and display flexibility

• I do not need to have my own way on most things

• I am willing to share authority and decision making with others

• I intentionally solicit feedback and am open to critique

• I pay great attention to my shadow side and manage it

• I give credit away in success and take responsibility in failure

• I surround myself with people who will tell me the truth

• I live under authority and accountability

• I realize that my leadership is not about me but about the mission

Indicators of Arrogance

• I am self involved and have an inflated view of my own importance

• I live with insecurity which impacts my actions

• I use others for my purposes and marginalize them if they disagree with me

• I display defensiveness and do not want to hear contrary opinions

• I do not listen carefully to others and am inflexible when others suggest modifications to my plans

• I am unwilling to share decision making with others

• I resist feedback or critique that is not in agreement with me

• I pay little attention to my shadow side and rarely if ever acknowledge it

• I take credit for success and blame others for failures

• I surround myself with “yes” people

• I resist accountability and chafe under authority

• The ministry is more about me than the mission

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

The temptation of leaders

It is a potential sin of all who lead and it is fed by success, knowledge and the power inherent in leadership. It is arrogance: hubris or pride – an inflated view of our own self importance.

As a reader of history I have run across any number of individuals who suffered from this deficiency. George Patton wrote this in his diary in the Second World War: “When I think of the greatness of my job and realize that I am what I am, I am amazed, but on reflection, who is as good as I am? I know of no one!” And then there was Winston Churchill who said that history would be kind to him because he would write it.

God has a lot to say about arrogance including this nugget in 1 Samuel 15:22-23 regarding Saul:

“Does the Lord delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the Lord? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams. For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the Lord, he has rejected you as king.”

Why is arrogance so distasteful to God? Certainly because humility is what he looks for in leaders since humble leaders are teachable and able to follow while arrogant leaders do not have either ability. Arrogant individuals have an inflated view of their own importance and thus listen less, feel entitled to special treatment, demean those around them in attitude or words and essentially raise themselves by putting down others. If not checked, arrogance can become narcissism and that is where King Saul found himself.

How do we protect ourselves against arrogance? One of the ways I do so is to lead through team which does not limit my influence but it does my power as that power is an intentionally shared power.

In addition, being aware that privilege brings with it the temptation to inflate my own importance, I seek to keep a sense of who I am and my own vulnerabilities. The more I know the “full me” including my shadow side, the less likely I am to think I am any different from others (I am not). Arrogant individuals are able to overlook the areas of their lives that are problematic or excuse them away. When we do that we run the risk of losing our perspective on whom we really are.

Finally, the more we serve others the less likely we will be to develop arrogance. Serving others is the posture of a good leader and of Jesus. Service develops humility as we identify with our staff rather than see ourselves above them. Humility before God and men keeps us from the sin of arrogance.