Counterintuitive practices of great leaders: Leading beyond the ordinary

There are several practices of wise leaders that are counterintuitive to how people usually think and act. However, these counterintuitive practices can help you build incredibly strong, resilient, and loyal teams. 

First is the practice of holding staff with an open hand. We breed resentment when we hold on to staff and make it difficult for them to move on or explore other opportunities. On the other hand, if we always tell them that we want the absolute best for them, whether with our team or on another, you breed loyalty. Those who are willing to let go find that people actually stay longer!

Second, developing staff to their maximum potential, even though it may mean they eventually leave your organization because you have developed them beyond your ability to challenge them. This willingness to develop others comes from a conviction that leadership is a trust, and a major part of that trust is building capacity into others - not to benefit you specifically but to help others use their God-given gifts to their fullest potential. This is an unselfish view of leadership development that benefits your staff, your organization, and others that your staff may end up serving.

Third, giving leadership opportunities away to qualified individuals rather than keeping them to yourself. This is counterintuitive because leadership opportunity also equals power and authority in the minds of many. Most leaders tend to guard rather than share leadership opportunities. It is counterintuitive to lift others up as we are often naturally selfish. Doing so, however, extends our own influence as we allow others to lead. 

Fourth, encourage people to speak their minds even when disagreeing with your ideas or thinking. The ability of others to engage in robust dialogue where any issue can be discussed, with the exception of personal attacks or hidden agendas, actually brings the best thoughts to the table. Leaders must overcome their insecurities to encourage robust dialogue, but they get the best from their people when they do. Letting others speak their minds even when they contradict our ideas is powerful and counterintuitive.

Fifth, encourage staff to accomplish their jobs in their own way (not how we would do it) within specified boundaries. Empowerment means letting go and unleashing others to use their creativity and gifts in their own way. It is hard for leaders to let go, but when they do, they get the best out of their staff—if they choose them wisely. Micromanagement breeds resentment, while empowerment breeds great loyalty.

One of my convictions is that conventional wisdom is always conventional but not always wisdom. The best leaders think differently than conventional leaders, and their counterintuitive practices reflect nonconventional thinking. 

Don't allow these issues to derail your great leadership

It is possible to have effective leadership skills and still undermine one's leadership. And this is not only a risk for young leaders for often for leaders that have seen significant success. 

Hubris. This should be obvious, but it isn't always! Success breeds confidence, and that confidence can cause us to overestimate our wisdom and underestimate our need for counsel. This can creep up on us over time without our realizing it until we are no longer open to the input of others, which eventually comes back to bite us.

Schedule. Good leaders are in demand. That demand can cause us to say yes too often and no too seldom. Busyness wears us down, tires our bodies and minds, and robs us of thinking time and even time with God. Schedule erosion eventually catches up to us in negative ways.

Entitlement. Successful leaders can start believing that the rules don't apply to them as to others. One of the ways this often plays out is in behaviors that they would not allow others to exhibit but which they feel they can. This may be carelessness in treating others in words or attitudes or taking staff for granted. Because they have the positional authority, they often get away with behaviors that they shouldn't, but by doing so, they lose the respect of their staff.

Laziness. Many leaders who saw success in one period of life lose their edge in another because they no longer feel the need to stay sharp, learn new skills, and understand the changing environment around them. This can result from out-of-control schedules or hubris, but whenever we stop being intentional in our development, we begin to lose our ability to lead well.

Health. I understand this and have had to become deeply intentional about addressing my health issues. When we don't, those issues often compromise our energy and our ability to carry out our leadership roles. In the second half of life, this is one that leaders must become more intentional about if they are going to go the distance.

Transformation. It is what God wants to do in our hearts, thinking, priorities (lifestyle), and relationships, and it is a lifelong process. I love the comment my brother made at my father's funeral service. "He was not a perfect man, but he kept getting better." Cooperating with the Holy Spirit to become everything God made us to be and to become more and more like Jesus is one of the prime responsibilities of leaders who model transformation for others. When we lose our intentionality here, others notice, and it sabotages our leadership.

Clarity. Lack of personal and leadership clarity leaves our staff and us without focus. No matter how brilliant one is, a lack of focus confuses those we lead. Life should be a journey toward ever greater clarity about what God wants us to do (and alternatively not do), what our priorities should be (and there should be only a few), and what the target is for our work (without which our staff will lack direction). 

Discipline. No amount of brilliance makes up for the lack of discipline in our lives. Our personal discipline reflects our understanding of God's call on our lives and our commitment to stewarding the gifts He has given for maximum impact. Lack of discipline communicates a carelessness about that stewardship. 

Jesus. Life is not about us but about Him. It is easy to forget that and focus on our things rather than His. But, whenever we take our eyes off Him, we start to sink as Peter did when He left the boat to be with Him. To the extent that we lose that focus, we hurt our leadership - and ourselves.

What sabotages your leadership? It can be one of these, or it can be other things. Being sensitive to whatever it is will allow us to go the distance.

Key lessons I have learned about leadership along the way

 

Learning to lead well is learned the hard way over time. I took time recently to consider what I know today that I needed to understand better as a young leader. It is a long list that simply says how little I knew about good leadership as a young leader. The raw stuff was there, but there was and is much to learn. If you fit that young leader category, these may be things to consider.

• Many issues are not as urgent as I think they are. Relax, and don't equate all issues to having the same urgency. 

• Flexibility is critical for good leadership. Most of life is not black and white; compromise is essential to getting things done. 

• Necessary or desired changes do not need to take place immediately. As a leader, I can only move as fast as those I lead can follow. I need to be patient and sensitive in leading through change.

• I don't need to take differences personally. It is about the mission, not about me. Pushback and disagreements are healthy if we can come to healthy solutions.

• The key to everything is relationships. It pays to develop relationships even with those who disagree with me. Mutual respect and understanding come through relationships.

• Anxiety is wasted energy. Don't worry about things that one cannot control. The worst is unlikely to happen anyway.

• I can be wrong, and it does not hurt my leadership. Develop a "nothing to prove and nothing to lose attitude," and one gains freedom.

• Just be me. I cannot lead like anyone else. God made me who He made me; I need to lead from who He created me to be. Learn to be comfortable in one's own skin.

• Don't die on anthills! It is painful and unnecessary. There are some hills to die on, but only a few. Be wary of which one you take your stand on.

• Don't judge motives. We usually don't know what they are, and almost always, when we attribute poor motives to others, we are wrong.

• Relationships are everything. Influence comes through relationships, so press into those hard with those one needs to work with, even if they seem to be detractors. 

• I should never measure myself against others. That is a false measurement. I should measure my progress and whether I am better today than yesterday. 

• My own inner life must take precedence over all other things. The healthier I am emotionally, spiritually, and relationally, the better my leadership. The inner life always comes first.

• I don't need to change the world - and I cannot. What God does want me to do is influence my small corner of the world.

• God is sovereign. When I carry around great anxiety and worry, I try to do His job. I can relax knowing that He is always ultimately in control.

• Not all things get fixed on this side of heaven. God is always sovereign, but He does not force people, and there are situations and people issues that I will not be able to fix.

• Humility is at the core of all good leadership. Arrogance and thinking more of myself than I should get me into trouble. We all overestimate our gifts and importance and underestimate our faults and shadow side.

• Emotional intelligence matters a lot. The more I grow my EQ, my relationships, leadership, and personal health improve.

• God died for the Bride and not the brand. God wants me to focus on His kingdom, not my evangelical brand. I should appreciate all of his players and not just a few.

• I don't need to compete but to be faithful. I am not in competition with others but instead called to be faithful to what He wants me to do. 

• It is OK that not everyone likes me. In fact, if everyone likes me, I am probably not leading well. Popularity is not the end goal of leadership.

• I am only good at a few things. It is how God created me (Ephesians 2:10) and is why I need others around me. Their gifts make up for my many deficits.

• I can never give enough credit away. As a leader, I give credit to the team and take responsibility for the failures. It is what leaders do.

• God can guard my reputation. This means I don't need to - even when people are obnoxious or hurtful.

• If I am threatened by others, that is my problem, not theirs. The question is, "Why do they threaten me, and what does that say about my inner health?" To the extent that I lack personal security, I must press into those EQ issues.

• Perceived failures are usually just growth opportunities. What we define as a failure, God is simply using to grow us into who He wants us to be.

• God can superintend my ministry path. He knows where I will be most valuable and influential. I don't need to seek success but be faithful to where He has called me.

• Position does not equal influence. I can have as much influence as He wants me to have from whatever position or platform God' gives.

• Success must be measured from His rather than the world's perspective. God does not measure success the way the world does. My job is to use the gifts and opportunities He puts in front of me for maximum Kingdom advantage. 

Leaders, focus and notice but don't necessarily do many things now

 Good leaders are always focused - on a few critical areas that if they do not drive themselves the organization will not thrive and move forward. This is not as easy as it sounds. First one has to determine what those few critical areas are. Second, it takes a great deal of discipline for leaders to focus and not be distracted by many lesser things that need to wait so that the critical issues are addressed. It is their job to determine what those issues are and then to focus on two to three at a time.

The discipline of focus is a critical component of a leader's skill set. They naturally see many things that need to be addressed and the temptation is to do many things at once. Not only does it not work but it drives staff crazy who need to deal with the many things a leader might want to fix or do differently.

This does not mean that leaders do not pay attention to many things. They are constantly paying attention to what they see, hear or discover. They are naturally curious and asking questions. They have many conversations with staff to discern what is happening. But - and this is critical - they are able to assimilate a lot of information without automatically trying to fix what they find. 

Why? Because it is not their job to fix everything but to focus on a few key things. Second, they bide their time until they have a chance to explore their findings or observations with the appropriate individual without being controlling or micro managing. It means they are willing to think grey on some issues until the time is right to address it in a way that does not violate others or take on their responsibility. 

Good leaders:

• Focus on a few critical things
• Notice what goes on around them
• Think grey on lesser problems
• Wait for an appropriate time to address lesser problems with those who are ultimately responsible

For most this will be a skill that is learned and not innate. But it is a critical skill if the organization is going to grow.

Ironically, the more a leader tries to change at any one time, the less effective they will be. Why? Because many changes simultaneously cause a loss of focus for both leaders and the organization. The more critical the issue, the more focus it takes from leadership, staff and the organization as a whole. 

Fifteen behaviors that contribute to good leadership

 

There are some life-giving behaviors that good leaders engage in and live by. It sets them apart from other leaders, gives them great credibility, and earns them the loyalty of their staff. It is also what makes their ministry or team successful. I say life-giving because they give life to people and to the mission of the team or organization.

One: Good leaders never make it about themselves. They have the humility to understand that their leadership is about the mission they have been given and that they are stewards of that mission. Healthy leaders keep the focus on the mission rather than on themselves. While relationships are critical, the best glue is missional glue.

Two: Good leaders build a great team. Many leaders hire people who will do what they tell them. The best leaders hire people who they can empower within boundaries and release them. They empower instead of control and are not afraid of staff whose skills exceed their own. In fact, they intentionally look for better people than they are in the areas they lead.

Three: Good leaders do not take credit for success. They give it to the whole team rather than take it themselves. They know that without God's empowerment and the team they work with, success would not happen. It is not about me but about us together. Staff are not always out front; they appreciate it when their leader platforms them.

Four: Good leaders don't blame others for failures. Bad things happen, and leaders know that they need to take responsibility if it happens on their watch. This sends a strong message that "my leader has my back." There may be private conversations, but there is no blame in public.

Five: Good leaders don't fail to address known issues. One of the things that gives leaders credibility with their staff is that they deal with issues even when they are hard. Issues not dealt with hurt staff, and the ministry and staff need their leader to step into the challenging places.

Six: Good leaders build a healthy life-giving staff culture. Healthy cultures have an ethos of candid conversation, collegial relationships, trust, lack of turf wars, shared mission, cooperation, and humility. 

Seven: Good leaders don't ask others to do what they don't do. They model the values and commitments of the organization, don't take advantage of their position, and lead the way by example.

Eight: Good leaders pay significant attention to their staff. Making time for staff, being available to them, removing barriers they face, and staying relationally connected are all factors in a healthy staff culture.

Nine: Good leaders keep the mission central all the time. Few things are more demoralizing than mission drift because it robs the organization and staff of a cause worth giving their lives for. One of the first jobs of all leaders is to keep the mission front and central with great clarity.'

Ten: Good leaders continually clarify what is essential. There is nothing more helpful to any team or organization than clarity. Ambiguity creates all kinds of questions, while clarity answers those questions. Leaders clarify all the time.

Eleven: Good leaders foster candid dialogue and a non-defensive spirit. It is wonderfully refreshing to meet leaders who encourage honest dialogue and are non-defensive when their ideas are challenged.

Twelve: Good leaders lead collaboratively rather than autocratically. Collaborative leadership beats autocratic leadership every time because there is greater intellectual capital at the table and greater buy-in. Few truly good staff will stay long-term without having a voice at the table.

Thirteen: Good leaders require high accountability but exercise low control. They set appropriate boundaries but give a great deal of empowerment. Nor do they insist that staff do things their way but encourage them to use their creativity and gifts.

Fourteen: Good leaders develop their staff and the next generation of leaders. It is life-giving when leaders are proactive in helping their staff grow. The ministry must develop the next generation of leaders.

Fifteen: Good leaders don't stay beyond their usefulness. There comes a time for leaders to move on, and it is better to move on when people want you to stay than leave when people want you to go.

Leadership lessons from the life of Moses

 

Moses is one of the greatest Old Testament leaders, but too little attention is paid to how he got to the point where God could use him to do great things. If one looks at his life from age 40 to 80, there are ten instructive lessons that ought to inform our own lives as we think about leadership.

1. God is always on time but is never in a hurry. Think about this. When Moses was 40, he thought that he was something and God could not use him. When he was eighty, he thought he was not much, and God was ready to use him. It took forty years to perfect what God needed to do in Moses's heart before he took on his God assignment. God is always on time, but He is never in a hurry. He wants us to be ready above all things.

2. In God's work, the heart always comes before leadership. At forty, Moses' heart was not ready for his God assignment. At eighty, it was. What do you suppose God did in Moses's heart for the forty years he was a shepherd for his father-in-law? He had forty years to spend time with his father, to live in his presence, and the proof of this is the humility that Moses exhibited at eighty that was absent at forty. It took that time for Moses to have the heart material that God could use.

3. Hardship is inherent in the process. Our growth as leadership material does not come easily. It comes hard. It came in Moses' life by needing to run from his adopted father, give up a life of privilege, and take up the humble life of a shepherd - as an alien in a foreign land for forty years. It is the humbling process that strips us of the dross that will keep us from being successful for God. It is not easy, but it is necessary.

4. God's callings are holy callings. When God appeared to Moses at the burning bush, the first thing He said was that Moses should take off his shoes, for he was standing on holy ground. Holy because God was present and Holy because the assignment God was giving was a Holy assignment. All God's assignments are Holy assignments wherever He places us. That is why we should take our calling and our vocation seriously, whatever it is.

5. God does not call us to do things we can do without Him. We should never be so cavalier as to think that we can do what God calls us to do on our own. Why would He call us to do anything we can do by ourselves? His assignments require His presence, His power, and His wisdom. Moses got this, which is why he repeatedly said, "I am not qualified for the job." Of course, he was not qualified, and neither were we. God calls us to do those things that require His divine power and wisdom.

6. God reveals Himself to us as we answer His call. The first thing Moses had to do was to accept the fact that God was calling him and to say "yes" to that call. It was as he took a step of obedience that God continued to reveal himself and give Moses the resources he needed to lead the people out of Egypt. It was a "one step of obedience at a time leadership," which is what ours is as well. God did not show Moses the whole plan, but He did prove Himself faithful as Moses chose to say yes.

7. False starts are often not failures. Moses had a massive false start. Was it a failure? I choose to think not. I believe it was simply one of the learning Moments that would prepare Moses for his big assignment. We should not be afraid of false starts in our leadership roles. God may simply be teaching us what we need to learn for the ultimate leadership role He wants us to play. Moses probably thought his false start was a failure. God probably saw it much differently.

8. God infuses what is in our hands for His divine purposes. It is a comical conversation that Moses had with God - especially because it mirrors our own inner conversations with God all too often. Moses says to God, how will the people know that I am from you when I go before Pharaoh? God says, "What is in your hand?" Moses says a staff, the most ordinary of instruments. God says throw it down, and it became a snake, and Moses ran from it....and the story goes on. God takes the most ordinary stuff that is in our hands or skill set and uses it for His divine purposes. We worry about what we have to carry out God's assignments. He does not. He simply takes what is in our hands and uses it for His purposes.

9. He does not call us to do it alone! Moses did not have all the skills that were necessary to carry out God's call, and he knew it. Thus, God provided Aaron to join his team and his father-in-law along the way to give him leadership advice. When God calls us, he usually calls us to do things with others who have the skills we do not possess.

10.  We never arrive, so our hearts need constant attention. Moses learned this in the journey of leading the people out of bondage and ultimately to the promised land. His own heart was tested time and again by those he led and the circumstances he found himself in. But he continued to nurture his heart and cry out to God for his presence and His power. It is all too easy to become complacent and careless, thinking we have arrived. That does not happen until we see Jesus face to face.

Eight reasons that supervisors don't lead as well as they could

 

I suspect that many staff would not give their boss or supervisor high marks for their supervisory skills or stewardship. It is true in ministry settings as well as secular settings. I expect that in smaller organizations there might not be as much expertise in this area but poor supervision is found in organizations of all sizes.

Before I share the reasons why I believe this is the case, let me remind you of how I describe the kind of teams that supervisors ought to aspire to. A good team is a group of missionally aligned and healthy individuals working synergistically together under good leadership with accountability for results. When you consider how rare these elements are on teams one has to conclude that there is a problem with the good leadership piece of the equation.

My own work with organizations around these issues has led me to conclude that there are eight principle reasons why leadership and supervision of others is lacking the quality it ought to have. 

First, we often put supervisors in their positions without giving them the training in how to build teams, empower people, lead others and resolve conflict to name just a few of the necessary skills. It is foolish to believe that anyone can take the leadership of others without some kind of training as it is a skill to lead. Moving from being an independent producer to an organizational leader is no easy step and without coaching and mentoring many never make the transition.

Second, there is rarely a specific set of expectations that are given supervisors other than the fact that others now report to them. In my book there are at least ten critical issues that leaders of others must pay attention to but how often is the case that no one has clearly laid out what it means to lead other people?

Third, supervisors often treat the supervisory role they have as a distraction from their own work without realizing that it is the focus of their new work. Leading others is never ancillary, it must be central. In fact, this is one of the expectations that is often never communicated. When supervisors or team leaders treat this as a necessary evil, their staff read it quickly and it does not encourage them.

Fourth, most supervisors or team leaders do not know how to create clarity for those they lead as to what they are going after, what the non-negotiables are and how they will interact with one another. Lack of clarity creates conflict, confusion, lack of common direction and lack of accountability. Yet many supervisors are not taught these important skills.

Fifth, many supervisors do not empower but tend to control. Empowerment within clear boundaries creates health while control without clarity creates disempowerment. Whether because of a lack of training or a controlling nature this deficit creates dysfunctional teams.

Sixth, when team is not central, supervisors do not develop their staff. After all, that takes time and energy and the team is not their highest priority anyway. Any leader who does not develop those they lead is neglecting the leadership stewardship they have. 

Seventh, many supervisors are not held accountable for the quality of their leadership of others. That means that many supervisors have no real incentive to pay attention to building the kinds of teams I mentioned above. Especially in the Christian arena (but not only) where senior leaders don't want to confront substandard work in the name of grace or niceness this situation continues to exist. 

Eight and perhaps at the crux of the whole matter, senior leaders are not themselves committed to leading others with health or taking the time to build the kinds of healthy teams we are talking about. When the example and direction does not come from the very top, it is not going to be a priority for the rest of the organization. Unless seniors leaders care about the issue, it will never become an important issue in the organization.

I know individuals with great talent and potential who are leaving their organizations for all of the reasons above. They have not been led well and they are disillusioned by it and want their lives and energy to count. The organization ultimately loses and I hold their leaders accountable for the loss. Don't let it happen in your ministry or organization. It is a net loss for all.

Five ways that living in grace impacts our leadership and relationships

 

There are few issues more important to us personally or in our leadership than a proper understanding of grace. Our understanding, or lack of it, has significant implications for how we lead and how we respond and interact with others. It is one of those areas where theology and practice intersect in important ways.

First, leaders who understand and live in grace do not have a need to prove anything to God or to others. If I live in grace, I do not need to worry about being wrong, nor do I need to live with defensiveness. Many leaders in the Christian arena are more about proving they can be successful than they are about serving Jesus. Grace frees us from the need to prove anything to God or others and, therefore, allows us to live in freedom.

Second, leaders who understand and live in grace don't need to seek perfection, which is really all about proving something to others. They can rest in the fact that God is in control, and while we do the best we can, we can leave the results to God. We sow and water, but only God can bring the harvest. Without grace, leaders feel they need to produce results. Living in grace allows us to rest in Him, do the right things, and trust Him for transformational results.

Third, leaders who understand and live in grace are able to extend grace and understanding to their staff. This is not an excuse for allowing shoddy work. It is a posture of wanting the very best for others and extending the same grace that Jesus extends to us. Harsh leaders simply don't understand grace. Think of the Fruit of the Spirit, and you get the picture of what grace looks like in relationships. 

Fourth, leaders who understand and live in grace create cultures in their teams and organizations of grace. The culture of an organization is often a direct reflection of the leader's own spiritual and emotional health. Legalistic or harsh cultures simply reflect the ethos of their leadership. Where a leader understands and lives in grace, he/she creates that culture in the organization.

Fifth, leaders who understand and live in grace create cultures where there is no fear of candid dialogue and diverse opinions because grace allows us to live with a Nothing to Prove and Nothing to Lose attitude. Without defensiveness, we can invite honest dialogue, deal with elephants, and create a culture of grace and truth. Where that is not the case, I would argue that the leader (and or staff) are not living in grace.

I would guess there are many other implications of a life of grace. What I do know is that leaders who understand and live in grace create healthy cultures, and those who don't won't.

Are you leading from positional authority or influence?

 

We are trained to believe that positional authority is necessary if we are going to have influence. In fact, we usually believe that influence and positional authority are one and the same or must both be present in order to be successful in ministry (or other venues).

I beg to differ. I have written previously that the best influence is from our lives and not from our position. If we believe that positional authority and influence are one and the same, what do we do with someone like Barnabas, whose influence made Paul what he became - and who probably had little or no positional authority. Or think of the average lay individual who has a huge influence on many people without any positional influence. 

Certainly, in missions, influence is far more important than authority. In fact, in most ministry situations, our position allows us to possibly tell others what to do (often not a good way to do leadership), but non-staff or those around us don't particularly care about our position. What they do care about is whether we have the heart to help and serve them. Furthermore, people don't listen carefully to those they don't respect, and respect comes from the quality of our lives rather than the position we hold.

Relying for influence on our positional authority is a big mistake because we can be badly mistaken that our position gave us influence when, in fact, it may or may not. Influence comes from healthy spiritual, relational, and emotional intelligence. It also comes from a kingdom heart that desires to serve others more than it desires to serve ourselves. 

It is the way of Jesus, who had no worldly positional power. Nor did it seem to bother him. His self-image was not wrapped up in position but rather gave up his position to have influence with those who deserved none of it (Philippians 2). 

It is easy to chase the wrong prize in life. Chasing positional authority for its sake is not a worthy prize. Investing our lives to bring influence for Jesus is the ultimate worthy endeavor. 

I often ask people who was the most important person in the New Testament outside of the Gospels. The answer is almost always Paul. Personally, I wonder if it is Barnabas who came alongside Paul when no one else would, loved him, believed him, and invested in him. It was all about influence, and it produced (in God's Spirit and providence) the greatest leader in the early church - at least in the spread of Christianity and the clarity of theology.

This ought to be a great encouragement to all who don't have positional authority in their lives and ministries. The good news is that our influence is far more important than our position, and we can have influence from any place God has put us. In many churches, for instance, the people of greatest influence have no authority. Rather, they are people who speak wisely, serve others, and model what a Christian ought to be. 

We may possess positional authority, but our greatest contribution will inevitably come from our influence. Some have both, but if all you have is positional authority, it is not enough and not a worthy prize. 

The most important trait of a church leader

In the years that I have worked with church leaders I have come to the conclusion that the single most important prerequisite for serving in leadership is a deep level of humility. The immediate pushback on this is that clearly, church leadership requires someone who knows and loves Jesus. That is true. But here is something that is also true. There are many leaders who claim to know and love Jesus but who are not humble and they often destroy the work of a healthy board. All other factors aside, without humility one cannot lead well.

Consider:

Humility is the key to leading on behalf of Jesus, the Shepherd of the Church. Church leaders are under shepherds and their role is to lead the congregation on behalf of Jesus. He sets the agenda for the church, not us. Many church leaders have agendas for the church. It takes a humble, Christ centered leader to lead a people to where God wants them to go. 

Humility is the key to ensuring that a church is a "Church called TOV" to use the title of a recent book. TOV is the Greek word for goodness and too many churches are not places of goodness (amazingly enough). It is often the lack of humility among senior leaders and board members that prevent TOV from being the prevailing culture because other personal agendas get in the way of God's agenda. 

Humility is the key to treating others with dignity, respect, kindness, and to empower others to flourish in their God given lane with their God given gifts. Proud leaders control others. Humble leaders empower others. The need of a leader to get their way, control those around them and "use" people for their own purposes destroys a TOV culture.

Humility is the key to creating an open learning culture. Proud leaders don't listen to others. They listen primarily to themselves or the yes people they surround themselves with. It takes humility to create a culture of robust dialogue - where any issue can be put on the table with the exception of a hidden agenda or a personal attack. 

Humility is the key to making decisions because the best decision making is not by one person alone but by a group of called, gifted leaders. Which means that there are times that I must submit my preferences to the decision of others. That takes humility and a theology of the giftedness of the group.

Humility is the key to personal spiritual growth and ongoing transformation. Proud people think they have it all together while humble leaders are very aware of their need for ongoing growth and transformation. And, they are willing to go there because they are not stubbornly holding on to their pride. There is no true personal growth without a spirit of humility.

None of this should surprise us as Paul points out in Philippians 2 that humility is a core feature of Jesus himself. In fact, in Matthew 11:29, Jesus says, "I am gentle and humble in heart." How many of us can say that about ourselves? How many church leaders and pastors can claim the same? Without humility we cannot be like Jesus or lead like Jesus.

Don't irritate your staff with helicopter management

In my many years of consulting with organizations, one of the prevalent complaints of staff is the helicopter management of senior leaders. First, staff are responsible for something and work hard to figure it out. Then, a senior leader "helicopters" in to adjust or redo the plan.

I often ask staff how this management style makes them feel when they describe this to me. Their answer is almost always the same: They think that they are not trusted, their work devalued, and the energy they put into the work they had completed. It is one of the most disrespectful things a leader can do to their staff, who feel marginalized and unappreciated. Of course, this does not mean the leader meant to send those messages, but their actions do just that. Every time leaders do this, they lose major coinage with their staff. 

What are the reasons that this happens? 

• Often there needed to be more adequate conversation and dialogue before the project was assigned, leaving staff unaware of the leader's true intentions.
• Many leaders simply think they know best and believe it is their responsibility to make the calls.
• Often, leaders are moving way too fast to pay proper attention to what is happening leaving them with little time for dialogue, so they helicopter down, make their pronouncements, and then helicopter off again. Their touchdowns can leave chaos in their wake, and they are unaware of how their actions impact their staff.
• Many leaders think that things should be done one way: Their way. So when a different way is tried, they feel that they need to intervene. 

What is the answer? It is to understand what altitude one should be flying at and staying at that altitude, allowing others to fly at their altitude and do their work. There can always be discussion and dialogue, but those at lower altitudes often know much better the issues they are dealing with. I discuss this issue of altitude in my book Leading From The Sandbox. Understanding the proper altitude leaders should be flying is one of the critical components of healthy leadership.

Remember that every leader's actions have ripple effects on their staff. The more senior the leader, the more ripples there are. At times one must pivot quickly, and that is appreciated by staff. However, when senior leaders regularly dip down to 5,000 feet when they ought to be flying at 30,000 feet, they need to appreciate the impact on staff. Find your altitude, take the time to dialogue with staff, so you know where they are and what they are doing, and honor them as colleagues by not changing their plans on a whim.

Great leadership in 22 simple words

HUMILITY

Leadership is not about me but about stewarding a trust on behalf of others and a mission that makes the world a better place,

SERVICE

Leadership is always about service: to those we lead; to those we serve through our organization; and to those that the organization interacts with.

INTEGRITY

Leaders model high standards of integrity and live with accountability as they expect the same from others in the organization. 

VISION

The ability to see the future and what could be is the mark of a great leader. Vision always believes there is a better way and a better future.

IMPLEMENTATION

Vision without a strategy is an illusion. Leaders are able to take concrete steps toward their vision on an ongoing basis.

CLARITY

The best leaders are able to articulate the mission of the organization with crystal clarity, build alignment around that clarity and ensure that the main thing is kept the main thing all the time.

RESULTS

Leadership should always have results that are consistent with organizational mission and clarity. Great leaders always keep the missional agenda of the organization front and center and can measure results and progress with precision.

ENCOURAGEMENT

Leaders lift others up and help them see what they can be and the contribution they can make. To be around a good leader is to be challenged to live up to one's potential.

EMPOWERMENT

Leaders give opportunity and authority away all the time. They don't control but empower within boundaries to the level appropriate for staff.

SELF AWARENESS

Leaders are life long students of themselves, how they are wired, who they need around them to be successful and how others perceive them. Good EQ is a priority for leaders. 

TEAM

Great leaders lead with and through others. They understand that there is wisdom in diversity of views and practice robust dialogue and cooperation.

RESPECT

Leaders always treat others with respect and dignity regardless of the situation. They set the standard for how individuals are valued in their organization.

  RESOLVE

Leaders are undeterred by barriers or problems. They will find a way around, over, under or through any barrier to achieve the mission.

RESILIENCE

Leaders must make choices that make others unhappy. They are not deterred by criticism or personal attacks but display remarkable resilience in the face of opposition.

CONTRARIAN

Leaders understand that conventional wisdom is often conventional and often not wisdom. Thinking like a contrarian helps uncover novel and new solutions to old problems.

LEARNING

Leaders are learners. They ask great and frequent questions, listen carefully and are naturally inquisitive. This posture provides them with unusual insight.

THINKERS

Thinking time is a standard part of a leader's life and schedule. They understand that busyness is not the goal but wise solutions and strategies. Thinking time is a high priority.

SIMPLICITY

Leaders are able to take complex issues and frame them in simple and understandable ways. They know that business is complex, complexity is confusing and their job is to simplify complexity.

REALITY

Leaders are always looking under the shiny hood to see what is really there. They value reality over rose colored glasses. They know that you cannot advance if you don't acknowledge what is actually present.

TRANSFORMATION

The best leaders are transformational in their leadership. They want to see individuals become who they were meant to be, a culture that is healthy and vibrant and an organization that brings transformation to their constituency.

MENTOR/COACH

Developing the current and future leaders of the organization is a high priority and time commitment of good leaders. They want to leave the organization  stronger and better when they leave and that is dependent on their coaching and mentoring of others. 

CULTURE

Good leaders do not settle for the culture that is but handcraft a culture that will help individuals flourish and ensure that the culture will help the organization reach its mission. They guard the values and commitments of culture rigorously.

A profound leadership principle that many don't understand

   Leaders must transition from being responsible for the job to being responsible for the people who are responsible for the job.     

Simon Sinek

This truth from Simon Sinek is profound. Too many leaders get trapped into trying to do the job they used to do or trying to accomplish the mission their organization is responsible for and lose sight of the fact that doing the job is no longer in their job description. As a leader, their new job is to build into and be responsible for the people who are responsible for the job. 

Many leaders will not do this because it is counterintuitive to them. For many, to be the leader is to get the job done - themselves if necessary.

But, in becoming a leader, our job shifts in important ways.

It is the move from focusing on my work to focusing on those who are doing the work. This includes:

• Providing maximum clarity to your team about what the organization is about, where it is going, and how it will get there.
• Ensuring that all your team is on the same page and going in the same direction.
• Mentoring, coaching, and helping your team be successful.
• Creating a high-impact team of healthy individuals working synergistically together under good leadership with accountability for results.
• Training new leaders.
• Ensuring your team has the necessary resources to get their job done.

Notice that these activities are not about our doing the job but investing in those who do the job. 

These are the leaders that the staff want to work for! And these are the leaders who get stuff done by helping their team be successful. Be that leader!

TJ Addington is the lead at Addington Consulting. We solve dysfunctional cultures and teams and help you build healthy, scalable organizations of clarity, alignment, and results. If the pain is high, you need Addington Consulting. tjaddington@gmail.com

tjaddington@gmail.com

Dumb things leaders do

Leaders can hurt their leadership by their actions, attitudes or lack of emotional intelligence. In my experience, the following attitudes or practices often cause leaders to lose influence and hurt their leadership.

Complain about their board members

Bad move. First it violates board "rules of engagement," second it will get back to those you complain about and it will destroy trust with those board members and you. I recently heard of a pastor who was actually complaining about a board member of his to staff at another church and it came back to bite him and caused great distress for that board member (as it should) and destroyed any trust that was there. If one needs a healthier board or has issues with a board member, work through the issues on the board but never complain about your board members to others. Just as you would not want them to do that about you.

Create an "us versus them" mentality

This occurs when a leader blames the board for decisions that they or their staff do not like. Wait! The leader is part of that board that made the decision. In fact it is his/her senior team so to blame them is simply not to take responsibility for decisions that they made. In our organization we call this Leadership Default! Any time a leader blames the board for a decision whether subtly or outright he divides the board and the staff and creates an unhealthy us verses them mentality.

Take credit for success

It is a bad thing to do! Yes, organizations need great leadership and the quality of leadership matters. But, the fact is that great leaders create an environment where staff and volunteers can shine and in the end it is everyone involved who was responsible for success. Great leaders always take the spotlight of success off of themselves and put it on all those who made it happen. They are humble, they are appreciative, they thank others and lift others up. They don't have a need to be the one who gets the credit. Where they do, everyone notices!

Blame others for failure

Here is the flip side. When we see success we look out the window at those who created it and lift them up. When we see failure we look in the mirror and take the blame. Great leaders don't blame others but take the responsibility when things don't go well. Hard? Sometimes yes. But then again if we have nothing to prove and nothing to lose and if we are ultimately responsible we do the right thing and take the responsibility.

Are defensive

One of the common sins of ministry leaders is defensiveness. I think of pastors who are not administratively or leadership savvy but won't let qualified lay leaders help. Or leaders who need to be right all the time and have the answers (no one does so we need to get over it). Too many ministry leaders are not teachable, are not approachable, are not willing to listen to truth and in the end hurt themselves and the organization they lead by their hardheadedness. I ran into that buzz saw of defensiveness recently with a leader and it was ugly. Defensiveness and lack of teachability is foolish.

Fail to regularly thank volunteers and staff

We can never thank good people enough for their efforts, their prayer, their financial gifts and their work. Not doing so is a sign of narcissism - obviously it is about us. But ministry is not about us as leaders, it is about unleashing others to be successful whether in a professional or volunteer capacity. Thank people often and with sincerity and you will be loved for it.

Don't develop their staff

One of the top priorities of leaders is to develop those who work for them, to help them become all that they can be in line with how God has gifted and wired them. Why is it foolish not to develop staff or volunteers? Because the success of the organization depends directly on how good our staff are, how well they understand their wiring and strengths and how they are deployed in their sweet spot. And it is what Jesus did with His disciples, and it is what He wants us to do with others (Ephesians 4:12). Leaders who do not develop others do not understand leadership, or think that it is all about them.

Don't set clear expectations
When staff don't know what is truly expected of them, they are in a no win situation. If they move ahead on something and show initiative but it is the wrong initiative (the senior leader was not clear on boundaries) they get dinged. Much staff frustration revolves around unclear expectations or expectations that change unexpectedly - usually because the senior leader is not clear either. Clarity for all is a gift. Lack of clarity is a curse. The number one job of leaders is to communicate clarity for his/her team. The number two job of leaders is to ensure that that missional clarity is delivered on.

Criticize staff in front of others
This is one of the most disempowering and dishonoring things a leader can do. There are certainly times when staff need direct and honest feedback but praise should be public and criticism should be private. It is a matter of honor and respect. Staff rarely resent honest feedback in private but will remember it for a long time if done publicly.

Dictate rather than collaborate
I have a friend who thinks that leadership means telling other people what to do! That is rarely good leadership. Rather, leaders build teams, empower people to use their gifts and wisdom and create a collaborative environment where the team functions together under good leadership. Leaders who dictate, or micromanage do not understand the nature of leadership and will not find or keep quality staff.

Treat staff carelessly
Every interaction with staff carries with it a message of respect, disrespect, appreciation or lack of it. It is easy for leaders to treat these relationships carelessly since they have authority. They expect respect but don't always convey it and there is not much staff can do when they don't receive it. Every interaction that is careless, harsh, unkind or sharp costs a leader coinage with staff. Wise leaders treat others the way the desire to be treated.

Ultimately when we do these dumb things we hurt the organization and the staff who work for us. Every once in a while it pays to take a step back and honestly evaluate the quality of our leadership - and perhaps even ask our staff how we are doing.

Leaders need to stay in their lane too!

One of the things about leadership is that they have the authority to speak into the affairs of others. This can be helpful if they do it judiciously. However, when a leader gets out of their lane and into areas that are the responsibility of others; go around supervisors to give direction; micromanage the work of others or get into areas that are not in their skill set they hurt the organization they are leading.

Leaders have a lane just like others in the organization and they are most effective when they stay in their lane. Many leaders, however, believe that everything that happens is their responsibility (bad assumption) so they feel compelled to poke into the work and strategies of others (bad behavior) and in doing so cause problems for the staff and therefor the organization.

It takes some careful thought to determine what one's lane is, especially in leadership where our authority gives us options. Many of those options are not good options, however, because they do not fit our unique skill set. We need to determine the specific work we will do as leaders given our wiring and the team we have around us. Often other team members can speak into the answer through their observations of what we do well and what we do poorly. Of course this only works if we are willing to listen to feedback about our best play.

I once did a staff audit of a church and almost to a person they pointed to their senior pastoral leader as the one who caused the most dysfunction on staff. He was a great preacher and therefor thought he was good at everything. Actually, he created a highly toxic workplace because he refused to stay in his lane or to listen to his senior staff or board about how he disempowered others. The result was a major exodus of key staff members that was unnecessary had he listened and been disciplined to stay in the lane he was made for.

One of the reasons that leaders are apt to stray from their lane is that they have seen success in some area and assume that they will be successful in other lanes as well. Unfortunately that is a poor assumption. We are generally successful at two or three things that define our lane and much poorer at everything else. Those things that are not strengths (we each have a few strengths) are weaknesses (of which we all have many). Learning to stay in our strengths and out of our weaknesses is a key to great leadership.

In my own leadership, it was often the people around me who were best at helping me understand my strengths and my lane. As a leader of a large organization, we talked openly about the unique role I could play and then empowered members of a senior team to play their unique role. Even as the senior leader, I had a lane and we were most successful when I stayed in that lane.

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