Generational Inclusiveness in the church

One of my great passions is to see all generations in the church valued and appreciated. Most of us would say we do this and some churches do indeed do it wonderfully. However, this only really happens with great intentionality because our natural tendency as pastors is to gear our ministry toward those we we know best - our own generation. And when we do that, we often miss those who went before us and those who will come after us.

It is interesting to me that we are told in the Scriptures to honor the elderly. Growing up in Hong Kong I saw how much the Asian culture does this and even now with my grey hair I receive honor when in Asia. Often, however, in our pragmatic culture we do just the opposite by marginalizing those older than us. Their time has been and we need the younger generation. The second statement is indeed true but the first is not. Our time has not been until we see Jesus.

Here are some ways the church dishonors the generations above us. First, when we don't see their opinions as equally valid as we do those of our generation. Actually there is a great deal of wisdom that comes with age and even though our perspectives may differ between generations, all perspectives are needed in the church. My experience in working with hundreds of churches is that pastors listen to their seniors but do not really hear them. And, many don't truly honor them except in their public persona. In other words, it is often disingenuous. 

Second, when we take away worship options that are meaningful to a prior generation. I think it is the height of insensitivity not to accommodate worship styles of those who have gone before us. This is not an argument about music but about how different people connect with God in worship, or don't. When we take something that is precious and could have found a way to accommodate, we have made a statement that we don't really care. This is especially true when our congregation has multiple services and can therefore offer options.

Before our mission candidates can go overseas they must take courses in cross cultural ministry. I often think that pastors ought to take a course in cross generational ministry because ministering to my generation is not the same as the generations before me or after me. It takes wisdom, sensitivity, humility and a very open mind to understand and minister to generations that are not my own. Why do I assume that my paradigm is the right one for other generations in the church?   

Often, when we disempower a generation by removing worship that they appreciate, we position this as a matter of what we must do to reach the next generation and label alternate opinions as sin or gossip or not getting it. What if the issues are in fact real? What if it truly does matter? We should not spiritualize decisions that we are making out of our own preferences especially when we can give people options. I wish pastors understood what it feels like to be disenfranchised and marginalized. One day they may and I hope will remember decisions they made in the past that did just that.

A third area is that of ministry. Personally I don't relish being put into some seniors group that meets for coffee and trips to Branson Missouri. I want to be active in ministry, mentoring the younger generations, caring for those with needs, and simply using my gifts as I have all along. But we must work hard to find meaningful ways to engage older generations as we do younger.

I think it comes down to a deep sensitivity that we need one another, that we cannot marginalize anyone and that means that we need to listen, dialogue with and work hard to be inclusive rather than exclusive. We need to seek to understand the values, concerns and perspectives of generations different from our own and do all that we can to honor them. My generation is no more special than those that come after me or go before me. It is simply the generation I understand the best. 

Think about these questions. What does it mean to honor generations different than mine? What does it mean to understand their concerns? What does it mean to care as much for them as I do for others? What would it mean for me to care for other generations as much as I do my own. If we get the answers to those questions right we will move toward true generational inclusiveness.

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I can't figure this one out and I suspect Jesus is perplexed as well

I spoke to another long time friend yesterday who is looking for a new church. Not because he does not love his current church, or the pastor or the theology. This is what makes it so difficult for him. He does not want to go. He is being forced to leave because the music is so loud that it literally gives him pain. Yes he has tried the earplugs and such and has been told he can sit outside in the foyer which to him is like being banished. He and his wife are in great pain because of all the deep friendships and their long time church family. But they have concluded they have no choice.

What I cannot figure out is why we are so insensitive to a segment of our body that we cannot accommodate those for whom the music is way, way too loud. This friend has no problem with the style of music per se. He does wish there were alternatives for him and a whole group that feels that way in the church. But of course they are older and don't count.

This congregation has several services so it is not as though there are not options to do differing worship experiences, even if one is just acoustic. I know many many churches who provide different worship experiences for differing groups. It seems, however that this issues is not on the radar of many congregations and that because of that they are sending a strong message to many seniors and others who are not of the the loud band persuasion that they are not valued.

Of course it is driven by younger pastors for whom the music fits. What, I wonder will they think when their own ears start to change and they are no longer comfortable with the loudness and they become uncomfortable themselves. While this is not just an age thing, it is clearly a problem for many seniors whom our church youth culture and its practices is unwilling to accommodate. These are the faithful who have stuck in there for many years and in many cases made the church what it is today.

Most pastors I talk to about the issue blow it off. They just don't care. I would think that would perplex Jesus who cares for everyone. Our desire for numbers and success is sometimes at the expense of the very people who we should be ministering to. Marginalizing those who cannot take the loud music is no different that marginalizing other groups in the church - especially if the church has the ability to do differing worship styles.

I know this is not politically correct but think about it from Jesus point of view. I suspect He may be perplexed as well.

Honoring those who are full of years and faith

The fingers don't work as they once did and the hands are slower now. The mind does not pull up names as easily and sometimes fails one altogether. The walk is not as sure and simple things not as easy. Eyes that loved to read do so now only sporadically as fatigue sets in faster.

The one thing that does not fail is the lifetime of faith stored in an aging heart. Lessons learned the hard way. Character forged in fire. The gratefulness of mistakes and sin redeemed and used for His purposes. A sureness in a fellowship with Jesus that is deeper than ever.

Soon they will join the fellowship of Hebrews 11, men and women who died in faith and who are our examples to follow. No different than Old Testament heroes as they followed well and finished faithful.

I honor those whom God honors. In many ways their day has passed but in God's eyes they stand tall, like Burr Oaks, full of withered, gnarled, character that has stood the test of time, each bend in the frame a story of endurance and faith in the face of adversity.

They are the seniors in our churches. We have much to learn from their example, their faith, their stories and their wisdom. They paved the way for us and we will soon be them. We owe them our respect, our honor, our time, our love and our appreciation. They are repositories of great faith that if tapped could overflow into the lives of those who come behind. Congregations that make room for them are blessed. Those who don't are less because of it.

Our day celebrates youth and beauty and many younger pastors target young people in their worship style, preaching and ministry priorities. Certainly we need to always be reaching the next generation but we cannot do so at the alienation of the prior generations. In fact, we owe then much and they are often the ones who have served faithfully and given generously. Their faith stories are often remarkable and deep. They have paid the price of a long discipleship in the same direction. God honors that and so should we.

Redefining what it means to be pro life

I would like to redefine the "life" issue from a one topic agenda to a holistic view of life from a broader theological framework. Being pro life for me is not being anti abortion (although I am) but about understanding the sacredness of all human life and what it means to be a life giver like Jesus (John 10:10) in all situations. 


Why is human life sacred? Because God imbued it with an eternal soul! This is part of what it means to be made in His image. This is why God was so angry when Cain killed Able in the worlds first homicide. He had taken the life of a living person with an eternal soul who was made in God’s image. That eternal soul is a reflection of God’s eternal being and to treat it without the greatest dignity is to demean God Himself.

How we treat other human beings matters because they are made in His image. Unlike the animal kingdom they have eternal souls. This is the foundation of the command, “Thou shall not kill.” This is why Able’s blood cried out to God when Cain killed him (Genesis 4:10). This is also why God demanded strong punishment for those who murdered others, "For in the image of God has God made mankind (Genesis 9:6)."

Based on this understanding of the sacredness of human life, it was the early Christians who fought against the infanticide of unwanted infants in the Roman empire. It was Christians who cared for those dying of the plague throughout the Middle Ages, at the risk of their own lives. It is why Christians established orphanages, hospitals and homes for the elderly. Human life is sacred. It possesses an eternal soul. It is to be honored, cared for, and treated with dignity and respect. Anything that detracts from the dignity of human life is to be resisted. It possesses an eternal, God given soul.


This is why we care about those that others often ignore: the sick, the elderly, the marginalized and the disabled. It is the "widows and orphans" that scripture talks so much about. This is why we care about issues like human trafficking, pornography, prostitution, racial discrimination, injustice, famine and the atrocities of war. Human life is sacred and anything that takes away from its dignity is an affront to God and the image He gave each one.


Being pro-life is caring about the dignity of all people, understanding the intrinsic value of all people based on their eternal soul and being made in the image of their creator. I want to be pro-life in every relationship I have by treating each individual with dignity and honor.

Sages among us

Sage is almost synonymous with wisdom. Specifically, it is the wisdom that can only come with experience and a life lived long. In a day when we celebrate youth, we often miss what youth need more than anything else: the wisdom and counsel of those who have followed Jesus and gone the distance well. 


When I listen to the life stories of sages I know I am always amazed at the experiences they have had, the lessons they learned along the way, how they overcame adversity and even how they live with the challenges of advanced age. One of my personal sage heroes died recently at 103. She was a woman full of wisdom, experience and deep faith.


One church I know has asked it's sages to share their stories, one each month, at length. They have recorded the sessions and are building a library of shared wisdom. More importantly, they are reminding the rest of the church that there are people among them who have withstood the test of time and whom we ought to honor and learn from. 


The elderly in society are often marginalized as unimportant. In the church, these individuals ought to be honored: they are the examples to us of what it means to go the distance, stay the course and live out their faith over the long haul. Further, they have a wealth of wisdom that needs to be shared. 


Does you congregation have a way to tap into the sages among you? Can we move from programs to keep our seniors happy to proactively seeing them as sages with something to teach the rest of us? Many of them are Hebrews 11 heroes who have walked the walk, talked the talk and gone the distance. Rather than marginalize them, we need to honor them.