12 ways leaders disempower those they lead

Here are twelve common ways that leaders can disempower those they lead. If you lead others, think about whether any of these apply to you. When leaders engage in these behaviors they lose the trust and confidence of those they lead. 

Don't delegate authority with responsibility
This is particularly disempowering when one is asked to do something but they do not have the authority to get it done. It is a no win situation for everyone involved and displays a lack of trust on the part of a supervisor.

Redoing what staff have done
Yes there are times when it is necessary to tweak what staff have done but a propensity to redo their work on a regular basis disempowers otherwise good staff. This includes situations where one is tasked to solve a problem and then the solution proposed is rejected.

Surprises that create consternation
None of us like surprises and when those surprises create extra work for staff it can be very discouraging. Especially if they could have been given a heads up earlier.

Dismissing ideas out of hand
Good leaders encourage innovation and new ideas. When they are dismissed out of hand, however, they send a strong signal that they are not wanted.

Declare rather than dialogue
None of us like to simply be told what to do. We desire a voice in a decision if it impacts us. In general, declarations disempower while dialogue empowers.

Take credit rather than giving it away
This is one of the most toxic things a leader can do when the credit really belongs to others on the team. It is a sign of narcissism and devalues those who made something happen.

Talk rather than listen
Anytime a leader speaks more than they listen one has a disempowering leader. They are not interested in what others have to say but what they have to tell. 

Don't give equal regard to men and women
Unfortunately this remains an issue in the Christian world. Unequal treatment of men and women is wrong and it disempowers women.

Lack of equal treatment and fairness
When leaders give preferential treatment to someone others take note of the disparity. It is a lack of fairness which disempowers others on the team.

Using the God card
Christian leaders who use the God card - "God told me to do this" - leave others with nowhere to go in dialogue, especially if they have questions of the wisdom of the decision. How do you argue with God?

Double standards
This especially applies to leaders who live and work one way but expect their team to live an work another way. Leaders cannot ask their staff to go where they are not willing to go.

Don't keep them challenged
I commonly find staff who are under challenged and under utilized but their leader has never even asked so they don't know. Not being challenged in one's role carries with it serious disempowerment.

The art of managing up and valuing those who do

I have an amazing staff and one of the things I appreciate about them the most is that they manage up well. In other words, they are skilled at managing me as their leader and it makes me a far better leader.

Every leader needs those who are willing to manage up. We need those who will help us think through different perspectives, consider different options, rethink old paradigms, and help influence direction. Leaders who are resistant to that are poor leaders. Those who welcome it are better leaders because of those who manage them from the side or from below.

I know that not all leaders are willing to listen to messages from below that they don't want to hear. One of the decisions I made long ago was that I would not work for someone who was not willing to listen to what I had to say - they did not need to agree with me but they did need to be willing to listen. 

I realize that we earn the right to speak and there are appropriate ways of speaking and a right time to speak, but all things being equal, those who will not listen to those who work for them are leaders I choose not to work for.

Why do I value those who manage up? First because they have perspectives that I don't have and see things I may not see. All of us suffer from a limited perspective! Second, because they care about the mission of the organization. If they didn't they would not make the effort. Third, because they generally have my best interests in mind - if they didn't they would not bother. 

The last point is one that leaders ought to consider carefully. Generally staff want their leaders to succeed because if they do, so does the team or organization. When leaders are missing something that they need to know (what staff are thinking for instance) it is a great favor to them to clue them in. 

One of the ways I have approached potentially unpopular feedback to those I have worked for is to say something like this: "I want to share some things I have been mulling on. I don't need you to answer me and how you deal with the information is up to you but I want you to know...." This way I have not put someone in a corner, have not told them what they ought to do about it (and that is not my responsibility) but have shared what I think or know for their benefit and consideration. 

I have always appreciated people who have done this with me. I want the information or feedback they have but I am not always able to share what I  know about a situation with them. Giving me the information without needing a response allows me to process and file it away and become a part of whatever course I take. 

It is when people have an agenda that they are pressing on me that such feedback becomes problematic. Managing up with an agenda that a leader do what they want them to do is going to backfire and is a fast route to diminished rather than greater influence.

Leaders who resist feedback from below or the side often get what they deserve as other staff leave them to their own devices knowing that their lack of knowledge will hurt them but also knowing that they don't want to hear. It generally does not work well for either the organization or the leader.

Marriage ministries in the local church

Yesterday I celebrated my 36th wedding anniversary and it got me thinking about marriage, the church and society at large. Those who have been married for a long time know several things. First, that marriage is not easy; second, that it is stronger after weathering the life and marriage storms through the years; three, that we are better people for having to learn how to live with and serve another and four, that stable marriages (even though imperfect) are the best place to raise stable children. 

Which caused me to ask the question: why don't local churches put more emphasis on healthy, strong marriages with a robust marriage ministry? I know some do and I applaud them but the vast majority do not and yet it is one of the most important foundation stones of healthy couples, children and society at large.

Think at what is at stake with healthy marriages. People are far happier married than divorced so it impacts the happiness and therefore the health of individuals. Children raised in stable (not perfect) homes are happier and healthier than those who see their family ripped apart with divorce. The lessons learned by going through the hard times (and we all have them) are invaluable and change us in positive ways if we allow them to. And stable families are the cornerstone of stable communities, and healthy churches.

I am not ignoring the fact that there are circumstances where separation or divorce is the best route for those who are abused or abandoned. That is a reality in a sinful world and I feel deeply for those who have experienced marriage dissolution. The church is far too condemning and exhibits far too little grace for those who have experienced divorce. God is in the business of healing brokenness and so should we be.

But if healthy and intact marriages are so critical to our communities, our churches and God's design for families it would seem that local churches would do everything they could to help couples grow in their marriage relationships. And, to help them weather the inevitable storms that life and relationships bring weather from outside or inside forces.

Marriage can be hard - sometimes very hard, sometimes needing the supernatural grace and forgiveness only available through God's power. But those who go through hard times and stick it out emerge with a greater love and commitment than those who don't. And they can help others do the same.

We focus on many thing in our church ministries. A focus on healthy marriages (and helping the unhealthy ones) is one of the most important things we could do. 

A historic covenant regarding life issues

This past week I had the privilege of participating in a Life Summit hosted by Life International in Grand Rapids Michigan, an international life ministry. I was there because ReachGlobal has partnered with Life International to integrate the issues of life into all the work that we do globally. With the dehumanization of people in many forms in our broken world we believe that the Gospel compels us to join God in bringing life and actively resisting the diminishing of life that was made by the creator in His image (John 10:10).

The title of the covenant is important. 72 Ransom Avenue was the venue for this international forum of ministries committed to the life message. It also has a history: First as a Jewish synagogue, then the major abortion clinic in Grand Rapids and now an international life ministry. It is symbolic of the brokenness of our world and the redemption of Jesus Christ who came to ransom people and bring healing to broken lives. 

Carefully read this covenant. It is not a one issue statement nor a political statement but one that speaks to the responsibility of God's people to be His agents of righteousness. It is a deeply biblical commitment. I am proud to be associated with Life International.

The 72 Ransom Avenue Covenant

God is the source and giver of all life. In a fallen world where the 
sinful dehumanization of life takes many forms, as brothers and 
sisters in Christ we hereby declare:

We believe that God created men and women in His image. Therefore, all human life—from conception to natural death—is sacred and must be treated with dignity and respect.

We believe that because man sinned, God sent His only Son to die so that whoever believes in Him would be granted eternal life. Upon belief in Christ, God’s Holy Spirit works continuously to conform us more fully into the image of God.

We believe that a relationship of trust in Jesus Christ changes lives, communities, and institutions through the power of God’s Spirit and the truth of the Bible.

We believe that a personal relationship with Jesus Christ reimages men and women into His likeness.

We believe that the sanctity of human life message is inseparable from Jesus’ command to go and make disciples of all nations.

We believe that Satan’s goal is to steal, kill, and destroy God’s image at every opportunity. Jesus came to bring abundant life to all mankind, so as His followers, we must be life-giving to a deeply broken and sinful world.

Therefore,

We are committed to addressing all aspects of the dehumanization of life wherever it exists. Through His Church, we will be His agents of mercy, justice, and healing to people who are marginalized, diminished, or abused, and be the advocate for the “least of these.”

We are committed to presenting the Good News of Jesus Christ to all nations.

We are committed to modeling a culture of life that reflects Jesus and to stand against all evil, which is life-taking in all of its forms.

We are committed to prayerfully developing and executing specific strategies for upholding the sanctity of human life worldwide.

We, the below-signed, are resolved to live out this covenant for the 
glory of God and the expansion of His kingdom of life.

Don't be selfish with your faith

As a believer, I have been given an amazing trust - as have you. I often wander the crowded streets of our world and ask the question, "what if I had been born here - without the opportunity to hear the gospel?" 

That question confronts me with the gift that I have in knowing Jesus, experiencing His grace, being given a life purpose and looking forward to eternity with Him. It is a gift, it is undeserved, but more importantly it is a trust.

The question is what do I do with that trust? Do I live selfishly keeping it to myself or do I live selflessly and give it away? I want to live selflessly.

For me that means being intentional about sharing the gift of my faith. It means supporting others who are in the ministry of doing this full time. It means using my financial resources to do all I can to expand His kingdom. 

There is no greater gift than Jesus. How selfishly or selflessly are we living out our faith? How are we stewarding that Gift? In a world that for the most part does not understand Jesus and His gift, those of us who know Him have an amazing gift. Let's not squander it.

Eternal perspectives on ordinary issues

Here's an interesting concept. Many of the ordinary things we do and activities we engage in have eternal consequences. So here is the question: Is it possible to develop eternal perspectives on ordinary issues?

Last year I became a grandfather - which of course means I am gentle and kind and wise (at least in his eyes). An ordinary occurrence (nothing ordinary about my grandson of course) but one that has eternal consequences. How I see my stewardship of this important relationship will impact his relationship with God, with others and perhaps with his divine calling on life. Thus I desire to take an eternal perspective on this special relationship.

Every month I make decisions on my finances - an ordinary issue. Yet, Paul says that we are to be generous and willing to help others and in doing so we store up treasures in heaven. In saying that, he removes my monthly financial decisions from the ordinary and suggests that I take an eternal perspective on my decisions.

Or, take my friendships in our neighborhood with people I like and love and who don't know Jesus. If Mary Ann and I can influence them to look at Jesus and His life changing relationship, our common friendship just took on an eternal perspective. So for the waiters and waitresses in our favorite restaurant - the Downtowner Woodfire Grill. Every meal there presents an opportunity to relate to and love those who serve us and know us and all of a sudden our meal takes on an eternal perspective.

Then there are my deep friendships with those who do know Jesus and are fellow pilgrims in the journey that is life. How I encourage them and influence them - and they me - has eternal results. If we encourage one anther toward a closer walk with Jesus and support one another in the hard times and rejoice in the good times, what are special friendships take on eternal perspective.

When you think of it, there are many ordinary activities in our lives that can actually have an eternal perspective if we pay attention and think them through. Life is more connected with eternity than we often realize. What happens here often has eternal impact. In that perspective, much that we see as ordinary is actually not ordinary at all.

The ability to do critical analysis of staff

A key skill of leaders is that of being able to do critical analysis of people they lead. Critical analysis is not about being critical. It is about the ability to realistically understand and honestly evaluate strengths and weaknesses of people (we all have them) and not to gloss over problematic issues or areas of needed growth.

Many corporations require, for instance, that a supervisor defend the annual review he/she does for subordinates with other select individuals. The reasons is that they want a realistic and honest evaluations rather than glossing over needed areas of growth. They know that without honest discussion, it is possible to ignore important issues.

This matters because one of the most important roles of a supervisor is to help their staff grow and develop and become all that they can be. Unless they are serious about discerning the areas of need growth this will not happen. In the ministry world it is often, frankly ignored to the detriment of staff growth.

It also matters because a lack of such critical analysis impacts others in the organization who either flourish or suffer on the basis of the health of leadership.

Here are some evaluative questions for staff who lead others:

• Do they both empower others but stay connected in order to help them achieve their goals?
• Are they clear on what their missional agenda is and do they communicate it clearly?
• Do they keep their staff focused on the missional agenda at all times?
• How intentionally do they coach their staff?
• Are they able to do critical analysis of their staff in order to position them for success and keep them growing?
• Do you see regular growth in their leadership skill and emotional intelligence? Where do they need to grow?
• If there was one thing that would make a major difference in their leadership, what would it be?
• How focused and disciplined are they in their work?
• Where would they benefit from coaching and growth?
• Are they candidates for a higher level of responsibility? If so, what additional experience do they need to become qualified?