The object of our anger in sinful situations

Recently I had to struggle with the failure of a Christian leader who I admired and respected. The pain of his actions have impacted numerous people including those who were closest to him. There have been the normal emotions of anger, betrayal, disappointment, grief and amazement at the behavior. These are normal emotions which only time, forgiveness and reconciliation can heal. Fortunately, no act of sin is beyond Jesus's work for us on the cross so I remain hopeful.

It did raise some questions for me, however. How does one respond in such a situation? I know that forgiveness is necessary and the twin roads of accountability and grace are the means to healing. But I was also struck by two other emotions.

The first is that I was angry with sin. Think about the pain in your own life that has been inflicted by others. Then consider the pain that has been inflicted by ourselves to us and to others. Sin is ugly and painful and harmful to all concerned. I hate sin and the more of it I find in my life or see its workings in others the more I hate it. There is nothing good or redeeming or worthwhile about sin. That is why Jesus paid the ultimate sacrifice to forgive our deep, innate, wicked sinfulness. 

Anger at sin is an appropriate emotion - perhaps even more than anger at those who perpetuate it. That does not let them off the hook but it is a reminder that the effects of the fall are huge and universal and very personal. I think of the pain my own sin has had on those I love and it makes me sad. 

Then I found myself angry at Satan. He loves sin and the destruction and carnage it brings while God hates sin and died for it. Satan is a master at using sin to destroy relationships, people, ministry, families and whatever he can. This is the point that Paul was making in Ephesians 6. Behind every sinful action is a sinful being whose minions are ever working to hurt and destroy and kill. Especially those who follow Jesus.

Finally I found myself sad for the one who violated trust and those whose trust was violated. I was reminded of the need for spiritual armor and vigilance in my own life. The phrase "there but for the grace of God" became more clear in my own mind. We are all fallen and vulnerable apart from the grace and power of Jesus and the Holy Spirit.

Am I disappointed with my friend? Does he need to confess and make restitution? Are there people who should be angry with his actions? Are there consequences to his actions? All yes. And I have often been disappointed with myself. But my anger is largely focused on sin itself and the one who is the author of sin, Satan. And I am even more aware of the vulnerability of us all, living in a fallen world - the legacy of our first parents, Adam and Eve. And the need we have for Jesus and salvation and the power of the Holy Spirit in our daily lives. I will not throw the first stone in condemnation! I will encourage him toward wholeness.

Can we talk? Three key questions in relational disconnect

It is amazing what a conversation can do - especially when there is conflict, disagreement or a relationship gone wrong. Conflict and misunderstanding thrive on silence and assumptions. Conversation makes even those we demonize human and at least understanding is possible when two parties are talking. None, when they are not.

Now there are times when further discussion is counter-productive, especially when dealing with passive aggressive individuals or those you cannot trust to not use the conversation against you. So there are times when we choose silence over conversation - strategically.

But in most cases the way to resolution between parties is a conversation with some good clarifying questions, a lot of non defensive listening, and a candid statement of where we are coming from. Several questions are key:

How did we get here?
Do we both want to find a way forward?
What will it take to resolve this?

The first question clarifies the facts or the perception of the facts. It is not about blame but about the facts as we can understand them.

The second question is critical because it calls the question on whether both parties actually want to find a common solution. If no, then further discussion is fruitless. If yes, there is hope for a common solution. Asking the question has the potential to change the conversation from blame and acrimony to "OK this is where we are, legs figure out how to move forward because we both desire that. 

The third question is a collaborative one. It requires both parties to think together as to how they can resolve the issue at hand.

There is not always a way forward. There is not always a will for both parties to find a way forward. But without conversation you will never know.

A historic covenant regarding life issues

This past week I had the privilege of participating in a Life Summit hosted by Life International in Grand Rapids Michigan, an international life ministry. I was there because ReachGlobal has partnered with Life International to integrate the issues of life into all the work that we do globally. With the dehumanization of people in many forms in our broken world we believe that the Gospel compels us to join God in bringing life and actively resisting the diminishing of life that was made by the creator in His image (John 10:10).

The title of the covenant is important. 72 Ransom Avenue was the venue for this international forum of ministries committed to the life message. It also has a history: First as a Jewish synagogue, then the major abortion clinic in Grand Rapids and now an international life ministry. It is symbolic of the brokenness of our world and the redemption of Jesus Christ who came to ransom people and bring healing to broken lives. 

Carefully read this covenant. It is not a one issue statement nor a political statement but one that speaks to the responsibility of God's people to be His agents of righteousness. It is a deeply biblical commitment. I am proud to be associated with Life International.

The 72 Ransom Avenue Covenant

God is the source and giver of all life. In a fallen world where the 
sinful dehumanization of life takes many forms, as brothers and 
sisters in Christ we hereby declare:

We believe that God created men and women in His image. Therefore, all human life—from conception to natural death—is sacred and must be treated with dignity and respect.

We believe that because man sinned, God sent His only Son to die so that whoever believes in Him would be granted eternal life. Upon belief in Christ, God’s Holy Spirit works continuously to conform us more fully into the image of God.

We believe that a relationship of trust in Jesus Christ changes lives, communities, and institutions through the power of God’s Spirit and the truth of the Bible.

We believe that a personal relationship with Jesus Christ reimages men and women into His likeness.

We believe that the sanctity of human life message is inseparable from Jesus’ command to go and make disciples of all nations.

We believe that Satan’s goal is to steal, kill, and destroy God’s image at every opportunity. Jesus came to bring abundant life to all mankind, so as His followers, we must be life-giving to a deeply broken and sinful world.

Therefore,

We are committed to addressing all aspects of the dehumanization of life wherever it exists. Through His Church, we will be His agents of mercy, justice, and healing to people who are marginalized, diminished, or abused, and be the advocate for the “least of these.”

We are committed to presenting the Good News of Jesus Christ to all nations.

We are committed to modeling a culture of life that reflects Jesus and to stand against all evil, which is life-taking in all of its forms.

We are committed to prayerfully developing and executing specific strategies for upholding the sanctity of human life worldwide.

We, the below-signed, are resolved to live out this covenant for the 
glory of God and the expansion of His kingdom of life.

Brokenness is the way to wholeness

Recently I have had the privilege of hearing the stories of a number of couples who are vibrant followers of Christ with strong marriages and a deep commitment to ministry. They all have something in common: their wholeness came through deep brokenness along the way.


It is the way of growth for those who follow Jesus. Mary Ann and I know this as well which is why we wrote the book When Life Comes Undone: Walking in Faith when Life is Hard and Hope is Scarce. 


Why the dichotomy of wholeness through brokenness? It is quite simple: It is in our brokenness that we finally allow God to do the renovation work in our lives that brings the healing and joy of wholeness. God's construction of healthy comes on the heals of the deconstruction of our lives that pain brings. 


One of the common themes among these couples is that they are deeply thankful for the brokenness they experienced. It was in their pain that they faced the bitter realities of their own sin and need and in the process found the amazing grace of Jesus' forgiveness and healing. They would not be where they are today without the dark night of the soul they experienced along the way.


Freedom and wholeness come to those who press into Jesus in their brokenness. That is why I call pain and suffering - no matter its source - as an unlikely gift. It is a wonderful thing to come to the place where we have nothing to trust in but God. When He is all we have, we realize that He is all we need. In the wake of the deconstruction of our lives through pain we experience the life that Jesus brings (John 10:10).


The key to wholeness of life is that we press in to Jesus and allow Him to do the renovation our lives need. And that usually comes in its greatest form in our deepest time of personal need.

A theology of life

Think of the amazing gift we have been given in being made in God's image, in being “image bearers” of the Lord of the universe:

·       We were created for eternity with an eternal soul

·       We were made for a relationship with our creator

·       We were given the gift of relationships with one another

·       We were granted the gift of moral freedom

·       We were given the amazing capacity to create

·       We were given the ability to love deeply

The apostle Paul puts all this in perspective in Ephesians 2:10. “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” The word “workmanship” means a unique work of art, a one of a kind. As unique works of God we were created for a personal relationship with him in Christ Jesus, in order to join him in His work in this world (good works) which God prepared for each of us “in advance.”

In endowing us with His image, He gave something of Himself to mankind. Our very ability to know and love him and one another is part of that gift. I can adore and love my spouse and my children and have meaningful relationships with others because He chose to make me in His image. I can know Him, serve Him, join Him in His work in this world because he made me in His image. I can use all my creativity in loving and caring and serving and living because He made me in His image.

I remember meeting my son Jon for the first time knowing that this was my flesh, my offspring. The day I met my first grandson, Gavrel, was even more profound, Again, here was a precious child with my DNA, flesh of my flesh of my flesh entering the world. In making us in His Image, God deliberately planted something of Himelf in His created. Just as I look at my grandson with a love too deep to describe, so He looks at us with a love that is able to see beyond all of our brokenness for He sees His image in us, however flawed by the entrance of sin into our world – deliberately planted in us by Him.

Our news is full of stories of the brokenness of our world. It is easy to become numb to the human needs and issues we become aware of. But stop for a moment and put on the lens of God. Your neighbor who is hurting is made in God’s image. The thousands of children who needlessly suffer from malaria every year for lack of mosquito netting are made in His image.

The disabled who are so easily treated as throw away people in much of the world are made in His image. Those who suffer from chronic dysentery for lack of clean water are made in His image. Those young slaves of the sex trade internationally are image bearers of God. The millions who are aborted annually are stamped with His imprint. The elderly who are shuffled off to a lonely existence are made in His image.

Seen in that light, we cannot ignore the spiritual and human needs around us or of our world and be like Jesus. Life is precious. People are precious. Even the most broken individual is a potential son or daughter of the king because all were stamped with His image. 

No other part of God’s creation was endowed with an eternal soul or an eternal destiny. To care for people and their situations is to see people as Jesus sees them and to love them as He loves them. To live selfishly, immune from the suffering of others is to reject the nobility God placed within man, even though sin has made much so ignoble.

Every time we uphold the dignity of human life, uphold biblical sexuality, treat our spouses well, care for those that society throws away: widows, orphans, AIDS victims, those with unwanted pregnancies, the disabled, the sick, those in dire poverty, the elderly, we join Jesus in bringing value to life made in His image. We join Jesus in His prayer, “Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” How is it done in heaven? Perfectly! 

When we join Him in meeting the physical and spiritual needs of our world we start bringing little bits of heaven and His values to a world that is lost and dehumanizing to those He created. We join Him in His quest to reimage an image made wrong by sin and bring out the beauty of what God originally intended.

We cannot meet all the needs of our broken world but we can make a difference for someone who is an image bearer of God. Every act of compassion that meets physical and spiritual needs is an act of obedience to our Father who cares so deeply for every human being. He hurts when they hurt, and wants every image bearer to find Him and be ReImaged into His likeness. 

Every time we go out of our way to bring life to a situation, we make the heart of God glad. Each word that encourages, touch that shows love, help that brings hope or Good News that speaks to the soul mirrors the heart of God toward those He created. None are beyond His grace, none are too broken for his healing or beyond His divine touch. 

Do you see people through human eyes or Jesus' eyes? 

Jesus and our pain

Guest blogger and partner, Mary Ann Addington

Co-Author of When Life Comes Undone

Last night as I was getting ready to fall asleep I was listening to 

John 11 from the YouVersion  app (LifeChurch TV).  It was one of those times when hearing it delivered in a novel way helped me to understand it in a new light.  

Three things stood out in a new way: First, how intentional Jesus was in letting Lazarus die.  Verse 5-6,”Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.  So that when he heard that he was sick, He stayed two days longer in the place where he was.”  Jesus had a purpose in allowing Lazarus to die and He knew that He would raise Lazarus from the dead.

Second, Jesus wept.  John 11:35 is the verse all kids love to get credit for memorizing.   Jesus had been confronted by Martha and then Mary for not showing up when they needed him and allowing their brother to die.  Jesus is not offended by their rebuke and gently reminds Martha that He is the resurrection and the life.   Mary, Martha, and Lazarus’s home in Bethany was a place where Jesus could just hang out over a good meal and enjoy the human pleasure of friendship.  When Jesus wept it was not for the death of a friend that he loved because he already knew that Lazarus would live again, but He wept for the pain in the hearts of his friends.

Third, Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead and in doing so triggered the conspiracy by the chief priests and Pharisees to kill him.  It would have been a whole lot simpler to stay on the banks of the Jordan River and avoid that whole mess.

Like Martha and Mary there have been times in life when I have asked, “Why Lord?  Why did I have miscarriages instead of daughters?  Why did my mom have to die a long and painful death after a car accident?  Why do we still live with the results of serious illness? Why do we have to live with pain?   I don’t get why you allow babies to die, why people I love suffer and die; why there is so much cruelty and injustice.”  We all have heard people say if God is so good why does he allow bad things to happen to good people?  Why does life hurt so much some times?

In allowing evil God allowed each of us to choose to love Him and live for Him.  In coming to earth and dying and rising again Jesus provided the ultimate solution for evil and the opportunity for each of us to “rise again on the last day,” as Martha said.  

God could intervene in every situation and save us from them, but chose instead to provide a much bigger solution that lasts for eternity.  It would have been a lot less messy for Jesus never to enter into our problem of pain and evil and to suffer and die for a problem he had nothing to do with starting.  He could have stayed distant and fixed millions of painful situations without feeling the pain or effort of really getting in the mess of life with us.

Jesus wept.  Not for his loss, but for our pain.  When we cry out in pain, Jesus weeps with us.  He fully bought into our brokenness and he walks with us through the mess of our pain.  Sometimes when a prayer group I am a part of is praying for a victim of abuse or other hard situations we will ask them to ask Jesus where he was when it was happening .  So far, in our experience, they can always find him and he is always weeping with them in their pain.

Jesus came to earth and got into the messy business of humans.  Jesus suffered and died a messy death to provide a solution for the ultimate cause of our pain.  Jesus rose again bringing the promise of our own resurrection and eternal life.  Jesus wept and still weeps with us in our pain.

The dangers of prolonged weariness

Our bodies and minds are made to run sprints and for a time marathons but we cannot be running continuously or for long seasons without hitting a danger zone. Weariness over a long period of time is debilitating to our bodies, our minds, and our souls. 


Weariness to our bodies may seem the most obvious and it can cause complications. After a number of health issues, when my body becomes weary I am more prone to illness so physical weariness is a sign to me that I need to back off. 


Mental weariness is not unlike driving when deeply tired. Responses are slower, reactions are often overreactions, and just as a tired driver becomes dangerous so do tired leaders. When tired, we do not think as sharply, our emotions are not as carefully regulated, and we are more prone to treat others without the care, diplomacy and concern for their well being that is normal. Tired leaders often use and abuse staff, often unintentionally. 


Tired leaders are far more prone to make errors of judgement including overestimating or underestimating responses to decisions that are made. Fatigue fogs judgement.


Of all the areas of fatigue, heart or soul fatigue is the most dangerous because it goes to the core of who we are and if we lose our true north at the heart and soul level, we lose our inner compass and here we are at the most risk. The evil one knows our default switches to deal with heart and soul weariness and we are at our most vulnerable in that place. 


Weariness and fatigue are a plea of our body for rest. We ignore it to our peril and put ourselves at risk if the weariness is prolonged. It is a bad place to be.

Do we really comprehend and live out God's grace in our lives?

It is not by accident that the hymn, Amazing Grace is a favorite for so many. It captures so well the essence of what attracted us to Jesus,  redeemed us and it will indeed be something that we will spend eternity trying to comprehend. "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God, not by works, so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8-9)."


I am convinced that we will never fully understand the full scope of God's grace this side of eternity but that it must be something that we push into daily. The more we understand His grace in our lives, the more content we are in Jesus, the more grace we show others and the more we look like Jesus. He is the essence of grace and it was what made Him the magnet for people that He was.


Understanding grace is a life changer for us and for how we relate to others. Too often we are recipients of God's grace but are not students of what it means to extend that same grace to others. The legalism, conditional acceptance, interpersonal conflict and lack of love even in the church is evidence of the great need for God's people to grow in grace. Knowing truth is not enough for Christ followers. Living out truth with the grace of Christ is what will attract others to us and then to Jesus. Jesus came full of "grace and truth." Do we?


For instance, when I truly understand and live out grace:


-I no longer try to earn God's favor but understand that there is nothing I can do to make Him love me more and there is nothing I can do to make Him love me less. Therefore I can be joyful and content in my daily walk with Him.


-I do not feel the need to play the role of the Holy Spirit in the lives of others but rather extend to them the grace God extends to me, pray for them and be patient with their faults as God is with mine. I am slow to judge, quick to think the best and remember how patient and gracious God is with me in my personal growth as I extend that same attitude toward others.


-I am able to forgive myself for my own shortcomings, knowing that God has already done that. My motivation to grown in my obedience is no longer about earning His favor but rather wanting to please Him out of gratitude for His amazing love.


-I forgive others quickly knowing that Jesus extends that gift to me daily. I cannot withhold from others what Jesus has so graciously extended to me. I don't give people what they deserve but what they don't deserve, just as Jesus did not give us what we deserve.


-I no longer look at people the way the world does but know that every individual I encounter has eternal value in His eyes and therefore must in my eyes as well. I go out of my way to love those that others don't love and to give value to those that others forget. 


-I don't display conditional love just as Jesus does not give  me conditional love. Unconditional love is the love of grace and it is an act of our will based on God's unconditional love for me.


-I love to surprise people with grace when they least expect or even deserve it. Just like Jesus with tax collectors, prostitutes, adulterers, lepers, and all those that were considered undeserving and worthy only of judgement. After all, God surprised us with grace when we did not deserve or expect it.


-I am not hard or harsh even when I need to bring correction to a brother or sister. Rather, my motivation is always love that comes out of God's gracious love in my own life. I display toward other the same graciousness that God gives to me daily.


-I love to encourage those who have messed up big time that God is not finished with them yet and that He can redeem their sin and give them hope and a purpose. After all, that is what God did for us. He is the hope for the broken, the guilty, and the hopeless. There is no person and no situation that God cannot redeem so we become evangelists of His hope.


There are many other characteristics of living out a life of grace. One of the most valuable things we can do is to regularly think about all of our relationships, attitudes, words and actions from a filter of God's grace to us. Reading the gospels regularly helps us to capture the secrets of Jesus' grace to inform us of what it means to live a grace filled life.

The fall and its direct connection to us today

While we don’t think of the fall very often, it changed everything for our world and for our lives. There is a direct connection between every sin we struggle with and every heartache we experience with the fall, when Adam and Eve chose to disobey God.

With the fall, what God had declared to be “good” and “very good” became bad and very bad. It is hard to comprehend the terrible consequences of that act of disobedience for in an instant everything changed. Immediately Adam and Eve lost the innocence of righteousness and realized they were naked and ashamed. Then when God came to commune with them as He did in the garden they hid from Him.

For the first time, they understood and felt guilt. For the first time they were afraid of God. For the first time they experienced relational disconnect as Adam blamed Eve. For the first time they blamed others for their sin: Eve, Satan and Adam, Eve. It was an awful, terrible, cataclysmic day of firsts that has dogged every one of our footsteps down to the present day. No longer would God walk with them in the garden. No longer could they even remain in the garden. For the first time, hardships would enter their lives and they and their offspring would suffer all of the effects of sin: Relational brokenness with God, with one another, disease, death, sorrow, pain, murder, war, bondage, addictions, and all the brokenness that we have experienced firsthand.

Of all the consequences of the image being broken the one most cataclysmic in its implications was the separation of the created with the creator. From friends with God we became enemies of God. Our sin made us objects of His wrath for sin cannot co-exist with absolute righteous holiness. 

From people destined for eternity with Him we now became people destined for eternity without him as well as physical decay and death.  Righteous hearts turned dark. Communion with God became distant where it existed at all. A friendly world turned unfriendly and uncooperative. It was a tsunami shift in every way.

Every heartache we have suffered, every fear, every setback, every funeral we have attended, every sadness we feel, depression we suffer from, sin we struggle with, physical ailment we deal with, emotions we struggle with – it all goes back to the fall. It was in every way a very far fall, a fall so far that it is impossible to adequately describe its impact. It was an eternal fall as people destined for life with God became absolutely separated from God. It was a massive fall as hearts that once embraced God now rejected Him. It was a fearful fall as people who once treated one another with love now used people for their own purposes. A perfect image became a ruined facsimile of its original form.

Yet, God in His love and grace left a residue of His image even in the fall. This includes a knowledge in the hearts of men and women that there is more to life than mere physical existence and a desire to understand what that is. Solomon says in Ecclesiastes 3:11, “He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet on one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” Think about that: eternity set in our hearts so that we would look for eternal significance. Yet it is still frustrating because “no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”

Paul makes a similar point in Romans 1:18-20, that God has indeed made himself known to mankind. “The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them. For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities – his eternal power and divine nature – have been clearly seen being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.” 

The very magnificence of creation in all of its forms from the galaxies in the skies to the beauty of the depths of the seas clearly demonstrates that there is an eternal hand behind all of creation.

Furthermore, God left in the human heart the capacity, through our choice, and God’s call to respond to Him and to enter into new life with Him. In fact, His intention to come and rescue a world gone terribly wrong was announced at the very time that he pronounced judgment on Satan and Adam and Eve at the fall.

“So the Lord God said to the serpent, ‘Because you have done this, Cursed are you above all livestock and all wild animals! You will crawl on your belly and you will eat dust all the days of your life. And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers; he will crush your head and you will strike his heel.”

It seems that serpents were forever destined to crawl on the ground as they became a symbol of Satan who had appeared to Eve in the form of a snake. But more important is what God says about the relationship between Satan and the woman and her offspring. There will be enmity between Satan and Eve which is understandable given his part in this terrible event. Eve would never forget the awful event that Satan had enticed her to participate in.

But then God says something more interesting. He will put enmity between Satan’s offspring and hers. But the apex of this verse is the last phrase, “he will crush your head and you will strike his heal.” 

Here God introduces a single male offspring who will eventually come and who will crush the head of Satan once and for all even as Satan strikes his heel. This is the first reference in Scripture to the One who would one day come and defeat Satan. Even on this terrible day that changed all of history, there would be another day that would also change history, the day that a Savior would come and defeat the evil one.

Think about this. From that day forward, Satan knew that he would be defeated by an unknown male offspring of Eve. He lived in eternal fear of who that would be and when that day would come. It is clear he recognized Jesus for who He was when He ministered on earth, which is why Satan tried to entice Him to follow Him in the desert temptations immediately after Jesus’ baptism by John. And, on Good Friday he was ecstatic that God’s Son was crucified! He had won! He had defeated the one who came to defeat him. Little did he count on Resurrection Sunday and on that day he knew he had met his waterloo. He had lost. God had won and all he could do from that day forward was to fight a losing rearguard battle.

All of history from the awful day of the fall has been a story of redemption as God, out of amazing love for rebellious people put in place His divine rescue operation that would climax with the ministry, death and resurrection of Jesus and culminate in a New Heavens and New Earth where God and His redeemed will live for all time. 

The up side of failure

We all fail, whether in large or small ways. No one is exempt. We mess up a relationship and it fails. We lose our business and it fails. We get a bad review and feel like a failure. We lead a team that fell apart - failure. A divorce, DWI conviction, being fired from our job...there are many definitions of failure. Sometimes it is true failure and sometimes we just feel like a failure. But what is failure?


At its root, failure is the opportunity for growth! It calls the question on whether or not we will learn from our circumstance whether self inflicted or other inflicted. It is an opportunity to start over and evaluate, re-calibrate, engage in God in a new way and see new life. Failure is not fatal but an opportunity. Moses found this out, as did the apostle Peter and King David or in our time, Chuck Colson.


When failure invades our lives it is time to call a time out! Depending on the source of the failure there is a sense of loss, maybe guilt, and certainly deep sadness. Nothing wounds the human spirit like failure. It is a wound, it hurts and like a wound takes time to heal. It is an opportunity and it will either take us to despair or hope.


There is no time when despair is more easy or hope more comforting than in failure. Do we give up or do we look forward in the knowledge that God's grace is greater than our failure and His sovereignty is not diminished by our circumstances. Understanding His goodness and His greatness is the genesis of hope, however small in the pain of failure. Press into Him and that tiny grain of hope will grow. Chuck Colson will tell you that his failure in politics and subsequent jail term was the very thing that forced him to open his heart to hope, in Jesus. Failure is an opportunity for growth! Out of his Colson's failure came a close walk with God, numerous books and the transformation ministry of Prison Fellowship.


Too often we move through life without much inspection of our path or introspection of our heart. Time outs, when we are forced to confront our own weakness and need is a precious gift. If, we take the route of hope and move closer to Jesus. 

Redemptive responses to problematic staff

In spite of our best efforts to hire well, there are times when a staff member's behavior or interactions with others cause problems on a team. Often it is not a matter of competency but of not being aware of how their words, attitudes or actions negatively impact those around them. Or, they may have a personal ministry agenda that is dear to them but which does not fit with the rest of the team or the overall ministry. Sometimes it is an issue of a wonderful staff member who fit the ministry when the ministry was smaller but as the ministry grew their ability to keep up has lagged and their competency in a small ministry has become a liability in a larger ministry. This is not only an issue for the leader who may be frustrated but it can also become an issue for other members of the team who are also impacted.

Being redemptive wherever we can be is consistent with the character and example of Christ. Healthy ministries will do all they can to resolve the disconnects before they simply fire someone or let them go. A redemptive response can take several routes.

First, honest dialogue with the staff member in question is key. Often in ministries, we are not upfront with issues that are present because we want to be graceful. But in not engaging in honest, candid dialogue the staff member is left with a frustrated leader and team without necessarily knowing how their behavior or work is negatively impacting others. Speaking the truth in love in a dialogue form where there is give and take and the opportunity to clarify gives the staff member valuable information on the issues. This should include bottom line concerns of their supervisor along with behaviors or issues that need to change.

If the issue is one of competency in their present role there should be exploration of other posssible roles that are in "the lane" and "gifting" of the staff member. When staff are in the wrong lane they are frustrated and frustrate others. Often the issue can be resolved by getting them into a lane more in line with God's gifting and their wiring.

Where the issue revolves around EQ (emotional intelligence) it sometimes takes an outside executive coach who can help the staff member understand how their behaviors negatively impact those around them. Lack of EQ is one of the most common causes of problematic behavior and if it can be resolved the issues will dissapear. This means that we are willing to make a financial and time investment to help a staff member get to greater health but that is a far cheaper (and more redemptive) proposition than simply firing them and starting over. I will do all I can to resolve issues with staff before letting them go. But if the issues cannot be resolved I will not prolong the pain for the organization.

Where issues of competency or EQ cannot be resolved, it is clear that a transition needs to be made and even then redemptive thinking asks the question, "How do we make a transition that honors the staff member and the organization?" Of course, that requires the active cooperation of the staff member to transition well and in ways that do not do harm to the ministry. I have always believed that how we leave a ministry is the real test of our character. If we honor it on the way out, God will bless. If we try to hurt it because of our anger, God will not. As a leader I cannot control the response of the staff member but I can seek a redemptive and smooth transition.

Any time we can bring health to an unhealthy staff situation we have a win. When we cannot, the win is transition. But in all cases we seek to do it as redemptively as possible.

Life as a journey from brokenness to wholeness

There are many ways of looking at the journey of life but I am convinced that one of the most important is seeing it as a journey from brokenness to wholeness through our walk with Jesus. One of the ironies of age is that the older we grow the more cognizant we are of our own sinfulness and inherent brokenness. That in itself is a great blessing because it sets us on a path toward the kind of life wholeness that Jesus came to bring. 

One of the most encouraging things Jesus said was that he had come so that we could "have life and have it to the full." The New Living Translation puts it this way. "My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life." Jesus desires to enter into our brokenness and bring wholeness - in all areas of life and in all those places where our own fallen nature and sin has brought pain or lessened the joy of life. 


We often look at our sinful tendencies with despair, knowing how often we fall into them and hurt ourselves. Jesus, however, looks at them with hope - the hope that comes from knowing that He came to lift us out of that misery and lead us to a life of greater and greater satisfaction in Him as we cooperate with the Holy Spirit to move from sinful tendencies to righteous tendencies. Jesus is under no illusions as to who we are by ourselves. He has a high and amazing view of who we can be - and are - through His redemption of our lives:

"In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession - to the praise of his glory (Ephesians 1:11-14)."


We need to start seeing ourselves as Jesus sees us and in response to his high and exalted view of who He has made us to be, press into those areas where we still live with brokenness and work with Him toward greater wholeness. It is not necessary to live with the disappointment of our brokenness. Rather we can see life as a journey with Christ toward wholeness and do our part in putting off those things that hold us back and put on those things that are like Him and will lead us forward. 

Let's get practical: What is the one thing God has been talking to you about regarding your need to move from brokenness to wholeness? Are you/we willing to focus on that one thing for the next month and allow Him with your cooperation to take the next healing step of your journey? 

There will be a day when we are completely whole - when we see Jesus face to face. The greatest gift we can give to Him and to ourselves until that day is to keep walking from what we were to what God created us to be. It is a journey of hope, healing, anticipation, ever increasing joy as our hearts become more like His heart. Remember we were made in His image and while that image was compromised by sin, He came to reclaim us and His image in us.

The church as a redemptive community

Local congregations that desire to mirror the heart of Jesus willingly and intentionally embrace the role of being a redemptive community - embracing the broken and the hurting with the goal of moving them toward wholeness and healing.

Listen to the heart of Jesus: "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." In the cosmic battle between the evil one and Christ, the evil one will do all he can to destroy people made in the image of God. Any way he can bring destruction he does and will. The pseudo satisfaction of sin is just that: the promise of joy and wholeness through the violation of righteousness and holiness. And with that destruction comes pain, guilt, sadness, addictions, relational brokenness and all the undoneness that characterizes our societies.

Jesus on the other hand, through the cross and the redemptive work of the Holy Spirit is in the business of redeeming what the evil one has destroyed and stolen in order to restore the image that He created us in - His image. Redemption is not just redeemed hearts (it starts there) but it is the bringing of life and life in all its fullness to people who have been damaged and victimized by the evil one. It is an ongoing process from brokenness to wholeness. 

If that is the desire, ministry and commitment of Jesus, it must also be that of the church. We are a community of the redeemed after all, who are together on a journey toward greater wholeness as we pursue His image. As such, we are looking for the broken and hurting, introducing them to Christ, and as a part of our discipleship, helping them move from their brokenness to wholeness.

Do we see ourselves that way and do we portray that "redemptive community" to those we seek to reach? Here is an interesting observation. Most advertising for local churches portrays happy, intact, prosperous families, vibrant worship, healthy people who seem to have it all together and are living the American dream. If you doubt me, check out the web sites of local churches. What does that say to the broken, discouraged, divorced, and addicted individual who is looking for hope? It probably says, there is no one here that is in my shoes. Now look at the ads for local counseling centers or drug rehab centers and you get the picture. And by the way, what does the American dream have to do with following Jesus?


How do we see ourselves in the local church? Do we see ourselves as a place for people who have it together or a place for people who don't but want to go there? Are we a community of the redeemed, moving toward His image (slow and difficult as that is) or do we already have it together? (an oxymoron until we get to heaven). Are we looking for the "nice" people or the "broken" people?


To put this into New Testament perspective, the nice and the together were the Pharisees who looked the part on the outside but were in Jesus words merely "white washed tombs." The redeemed who were moving toward wholeness from brokenness were the tax collectors, prostitutes, lepers, and generally the scum of the earth who understood brokenness and craved wholeness. 


I wonder if the modern day pharisees are those who pretend that they  have it together spiritually when inside there is a lot of hidden darkness and brokenness. I wonder if the modern day prostitutes and tax collectors are those who know how desperately broken they are and who genuinely crave the mercy, love and wholeness that Jesus brings. That is what a redemptive community looks like. Can whole congregations be characterized by one group or the other?

Grace, Transparency and the Church

One of the advantages of my work is that I get to visit many different churches each year - both in the US and globally. What is interesting to me is the continuum between churches with great personal transparency and those where such transparency is both lacking and most likely not safe. For some reason it is OK to struggle with sin and the issues of life prior to salvation but once saved, most evangelicals feel that they need to live up to some standard or culture that prevents honest transparency on issues that would actually aid in the process of sanctification.

It has often been said that if you want to get honesty go to the local bar rather than the local church. That is a sad commentary where it is true.

What we are left with are individuals who secretly struggle with all the baggage of life including addictions, sexual sin, temptations, attitudes, or basic identity issues and the very place where these struggles should be worked out - is often an unsafe place to reveal them. There are some wonderful exceptions to this where transparency and realness is practiced in a culture of grace and it is in those settings that I believe the most life change takes place because there is not a need to hide. Rather there is a shared journey toward wholeness, healing and Christ's character.

What sets such churches apart from the norm? I would suggest that there are several key factors. 

First, these churches have pastors and staff who value transparency and model it themselves. There is nothing more powerful than honest transparency from the pulpit. Like all organizational culture, this starts with a leader who communicates grace, acknowledges their own place in their spiritual journey and examples from their own lives. The more appropriate transparency there is from the pulpit the more transparent the culture of the congregation.

Second, transparent congregations tell many honest stories of life transformation. It takes one story, for instance from a couple who have struggled in their marriage and found healing and restoration to make it permissible for others who are struggling to admit their need for healing as well. Multiply those stories across the wide range of struggles people face and the healing that Christ brings. All of us, after all are on a journey of healing and spiritual formation. Telling stories of God's grace makes that journey from brokenness to wholeness normative and expected. People need to be know and encouraged that God can take their brokenness and redeem it no matter how broken they are.

Finally, these are congregations that understand and major on grace. We often focus on the need for grace to come to Christ. The truth is we need as much grace after salvation as before. We need grace every moment of every day. We cannot live up to God's expectations - or our own - unless we are living in the power of God's Spirit and daily appropriating His grace. The church is a place for broken people, those who are broken and need Christ and those who know Christ and need wholeness. 

Grace filled congregations are also humble congregations. They do not pretend to have it all together. They have leaders who admit their sin and live in dependence on God rather than in pride or self sufficiency. 

Church cultures like all organizational cultures are either accidental or deliberately created. A culture of grace and transparency can be deliberately developed. Grace and transparency encourage vulnerability and vulnerability is the first step toward growth. The church should be the premier place where we can journey from brokenness to wholeness.

Reconciling Irreconcilable Differences

One of the realities of life is that there are times when it is impossible to reconcile differences. It may be because two parties start with deeply different philosophical positions that are simple incompatible. It may be that EQ issues with one of the parties is such that it is not possible to rationally dialogue and resolve differences. Sometimes, no matter how much time has been spent in dialogue and conversation, even with a third party present, no progress is made toward real resolution. Many of us have experienced such a situation.

There are some who would take the Rodney King position: "Can't we just all get along?" It is a wonderful but naive thought! Sometimes people cannot just get along in in a manner that is productive. At least if they must be working together. There are situations where even believers are better off going their separate ways but in peace. The word peace is the operative word. 


I once told a staff member who had violated me and leadership principles in our organization that we could resolve our issues two different ways. One was to go through the hard work of working through contentious issues. The other was to acknowledge that we were unlikely to agree but to choose to bless one another.

I love reconciliation - it is at the heart of what God came to do between us and God and between one another. It is always the goal. But what does one do when there cannot be agreement on something deeply important or resolution on a matter that has become conflictual? After all, reconciliation takes two parties and the ability to agree to a resolution.

One possibility is to continue the conflict - but that is not pleasing to God or productive to the kingdom.

The other alternative is to simply acknowledge that we will not resolve our differences but that we can bless one another and choose to live with those differences, not harm the other but rather bless the other. Not all differences are resolvable but we make choices as to our attitudes about people and whether we will live at peace with them, bless them and wish the best for them. That does not mean that we need to pretend we agree and it does not necessarily mean that we have to work together. 


This route is often the most difficult because in the absence of agreement, and being able to negotiate through issues that are close to our heart, we have to give up our need to be right and simply choose to live at peace with one another, to be proactive in our blessing of one another and let time sort out the rest - whether it does or does not. That takes humility because rather than being proven right we simply chose to put the issue aside for the greater cause of Christ and to uphold the reputation of Christ: "May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me." The unity of God's people is more important than our need to resolve all issues or agree on all issues. In the end it is not about upholding our reputation but His! 

Are both these options true reconciliation? The first is reconciliation through working through the differences. The second is reconciliation through working through attitudes in spite of not being able to resolve the differences. The second is harder and takes greater humility. Both honor God and uphold the reputation of Christ. Both take a desire on both parties to move forward.

The numbers tell the story

Here is a mission field that is world wide. The numbers tell the story. I am thankful that there are people who are ministering to those affected with the gospel, with love and with healing. 

Watch this video....

 http://vimeo.com/18792664

Cultures of Life and Death

The culture of Christ is a culture of life in all of its dimensions. It sees people as made in the image of God with eternal souls. As men and women and children in His image it sees them as infinitely precious and rejects all actions, attitudes or institutions that demean or diminish that image. 

As image bearers - no matter how flawed the image by the fall, every individual on this planet has infinite value to the Creator, and therefore to us as His family members. 


But just as the culture of Christ is a culture of life in all of its dimensions, the culture of the evil one is that of death and destruction in all of its dimensions. Jesus put it this way in John 10:10, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." Christ brings life. Satan brings death.


It should not surprise us, therefore, that the predominate culture of our world is one of the devaluing of human life. Think of all the things that devalue life: pornography, sexual promiscuity, lack of justice, corruption, the sex trade, abortion, the indiscriminate killing of civilians in warfare, spousal and child abuse, slavery, discrimination, and all behaviors that devalue people. Wherever people are marginalized, mistreated, denied basic rights, oppressed, used and denied justice, the culture of the evil one prevails - and that is most of our world.


The Gospel is good news for the soul - and the only route to eternal life - but its implications are far broader than that. Jesus invaded our world to right what had gone wrong in the fall and which will be completed in his return. We are told to pray (and therefore act) that "His will would be done on earth as it is in heaven." The gospel brings eternal life but it also must bring a culture of life to a world that has a culture of death and devaluation of people made in His image.


As Christ followers we are called to live and to promote a culture of life where the dignity of individuals is lifted high, where those things that devalue life are seen for what they are and to the extent that we can have an influence, eradicated. 


Think about this: Prison ministry brings a culture of life to a dark place; abstinence education globally brings a culture of life rather than a culture of using people for our own gratification; those who stand up for justice bring a culture of life; those who help women with unwanted pregnancy stand up for a culture of life; those who minister to orphans and widows the same. Every time we act to help those who are marginalized, mistreated, oppressed or uphold the dignity of people made in God's image we support a culture of life.

The thief comes to steal and destroy in every way He can. Jesus comes to heal, save and restore in all dimensions of life. When we join Him in that work we support Him and push back the culture of death with His culture of life.

Hard but healing words

Six of the hardest words to speak are: “I was wrong,” and “I am sorry.” Ironically while they may be some of the hardest words to speak, they are also the very words that have the power to heal relationships like little else. In fact the harder we find it to verbalize these words the more power those words have to heal.

Why so hard to say? Our pride and the pull of our lower nature conspire against us to cling to our own righteousness even when that righteousness is really nothing less than sinfulness and even thought the cost of our “righteous” silence is relational disconnection against those we caused offence. The more we have personally vested in being right, the harder it is to admit wrong which is why those of us in leadership are often the last to admit wrong and apologize.

There is a reason that Scriptures talk so often of humility. At our core, our lower nature craves autonomy and pride. Proverbs says that God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. Why we ask? Because pride is the primary characteristic of Satan who elevated himself above God, while humility is the defining characteristic of Jesus in the incarnation (Philippians 2).  God cannot honor pride which elevates our interests above His. He will always honor humility because it mirrors His heart and a willing submission to His will.

Thus each time we resist making things right when we have been wrong we reflect our lower nature and the master of pride. Each time we humble ourselves to make things right we reflect the transformed life and the Lord Jesus Christ. That puts a whole different perspective on the struggle to say these words.

Keeping short accounts reflects the heart of Jesus. The humility of admitting wrong and asking forgiveness reflects the character of Jesus. Wanting whole relationships when they have been broken by our sin or error reflects the reconciliation of Jesus.

Climbing out of a Hole

It has happened to each of us. We have dug a hole for ourselves by treating someone with lack of dignity, marginalizing them, holding bitterness or maligning them to others and our attitude and actions have hurt them and hurt ministry and possibly hurt the team with which we work. Bottom line we are in a deep hole that we need to extricate ourselves from.

Often, our first thought is "how do I get out without too much embarrassment:" Our concern is for ourselves rather than for the harm we have caused or the sin we have committed. It goes to the fallen nature of our hearts.

What we should be asking before we do anything is "How did I get here? Why did I do what I did? Was it my pride, my arrogance, my desire to get my own way? Did I not listen to others? Did I have an agenda that I was driving that got in the way of relationships, team process or the feelings of others? What sinful attitudes on my part contributed to what I did? Am I harboring bitterness, ill will or wrongly attributed motives toward others?"

Before we try to make the wrong right, we need to understand our own hearts and take a hard, surgical, painful look at how we got to where we got. Most people, even when they need to make things right, sidestep this hard look - it is too painful. But without acknowledging the true and full nature of our fallenness, our sin and how we got into the hole we are in, our efforts to get out of the hole will be less than perfect. Glossing over the issues will actually hinder our efforts to make things right.

Once we have taken the hard look, we need to come completely, fully, transparently clean with those we have hurt - whether it is one person, a team, or a group. It is not enough to apologize to those we have hurt if we have also maligned them with others. That is an insincere apology. It is an apology that makes us feel better but that does not acknowledge the full extent of our wrong and to others and until we are willing to make the full wrong right, we remain guilty for the sin we have committed against others that has not been dealt with.

Real repentance is all about humility. Humility takes place when we recognize and name the full extent of our sin and resolve that sin to the full extent of our ability. When we choose not to fully come clean our pride is still ruling our hearts because our true strategy is to apologize to the extent we need to but to continue to preserve our dignity. It is a disingenuous repentance that remains committed to protecting ourselves rather than fully acknowledging what we have done to others. It is a self-focused apology.

Finally, to the extent of our ability we need to make our wrong right with those we have gossiped with, maligned others with, or divided by our sinful attitudes or actions. This is the hardest step but until this step is taken we have not made right our offense. To not do so is to make ourselves feel good (we asked for forgiveness) but to leave the results of our sin (what we have said to others about another) simmering with its painful ramifications. For now there are barriers between those we spoke to about another that remain until we make right what we made wrong.

Wise men and women make right what they have made wrong. Foolish men and women do not. One is a way of humility. The other is a way of pride. One is a way of righteousness. The other is a way of the fallen sinful nature.

Climbing out of a hole we have created is hard, but it is possible, if we will humble ourselves and do what we need to do - all of what we need to do to make it right. The hole is dark. The sunshine of freedom at the top is wonderful. There is pain in making the climb out but the freedom at the top is wonderful. And we won't want to have to make that kind of climb again