Organizational pride and its impact on ministry

The problem of pride does not just impact individuals. It infects churches and Christian organizations as well. And it's impact is just as insidious.

The root of organizational pride is usually found in a period of "success" sometime in the ministry's history - the glory days if you will. For churches this is usually when they had the largest attendance and they were a big deal in the community. Years later, even with new circumstances and different numbers, those years are remembered and in the corporate memory they are still "a big deal." Even when in decline, years later, many churches believe they are still back in the glory days.

Like individual pride, organizational pride has its consequences. Pride keeps us from seeing our current reality. Pride keeps us from getting help. Pride keeps us from understanding that times have changed and so must we. Pride keeps us from learning from others - after all we are the experts. At all levels, organizational pride is a cancer that erodes our effectiveness and holds us back.

It is also a foolish posture because no organization stays at the top of the list forever. Ironically many ministries have the greatest pride long after the big time is over. And it keeps them from moving into a new future of productive ministry. 

Humility is not only the posture of a mature ministry but it is the key to moving from one period of ministry to another. A humble ministry does not get stuck in a past period of productivity since it has nothing to prove in the present. Humble ministries learn, grow, re-invent and focus on the present and future while prideful ministries focus on that period of success in their past: a crucial difference. 

I have worked with ministries who were immensely successful in a period of their ministry. That success made them resistant to the very changes that were needed to move to a new level of ministry effectiveness. They didn't want to hear that what got you to here will not get you to there. Their pride got in the way of seeing what they needed to see to move forward.

A period of success can fuel pride and in an ironic twist, that pride keeps us from moving forward in the present. Resist it if you are a leader. Humble ministries are far more nimble and change friendly than prideful ministries. Humble ministries have nothing to prove and nothing to lose. 

Two phrases we ought to use more often

The first is "thank you." All of us have much to be thankful for from those around us whether family, friends, colleagues or staff. It is easy to fall into complacency and forget to thank them for what they do. This is especially true with staff who work hard. We ought to thank them often and specifically. Not to do so is to take them for granted: think of the hole they would leave if they were not there!

The second is "I am sorry." Or, "I blew it." When we blow it we ought to have the honesty and courage to admit it. That simple admission says a lot to those around us. It tells them that we care about them, that we have a measure of humility and that we understand our own humanity.

Both phrases say something about us: We care about others and we are other focused rather than us focused. There is the building of humility in both. 

Powerful phrases. Use them often.

The temptation of leaders

It is a potential sin of all who lead and it is fed by success, knowledge and the power inherent in leadership. It is arrogance: hubris or pride – an inflated view of our own self importance.

As a reader of history I have run across any number of individuals who suffered from this deficiency. George Patton wrote this in his diary in the Second World War: “When I think of the greatness of my job and realize that I am what I am, I am amazed, but on reflection, who is as good as I am? I know of no one!” And then there was Winston Churchill who said that history would be kind to him because he would write it.

God has a lot to say about arrogance including this nugget in 1 Samuel 15:22-23 regarding Saul:

“Does the Lord delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the Lord? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams. For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the Lord, he has rejected you as king.”

Why is arrogance so distasteful to God? Certainly because humility is what he looks for in leaders since humble leaders are teachable and able to follow while arrogant leaders do not have either ability. Arrogant individuals have an inflated view of their own importance and thus listen less, feel entitled to special treatment, demean those around them in attitude or words and essentially raise themselves by putting down others. If not checked, arrogance can become narcissism and that is where King Saul found himself.

How do we protect ourselves against arrogance? One of the ways I do so is to lead through team which does not limit my influence but it does my power as that power is an intentionally shared power.

In addition, being aware that privilege brings with it the temptation to inflate my own importance, I seek to keep a sense of who I am and my own vulnerabilities. The more I know the “full me” including my shadow side, the less likely I am to think I am any different from others (I am not). Arrogant individuals are able to overlook the areas of their lives that are problematic or excuse them away. When we do that we run the risk of losing our perspective on whom we really are.

Finally, the more we serve others the less likely we will be to develop arrogance. Serving others is the posture of a good leader and of Jesus. Service develops humility as we identify with our staff rather than see ourselves above them. Humility before God and men keeps us from the sin of arrogance.

The heart of humility

The heart of humility is understanding the two fold truth that God has given us strengths as a trust and that the rest of our portfolio is made up of weaknesses where we very much need others.

Much of my work revolves around writing whether my almost daily blog, books, or material for the organization I lead. Writing for me is relatively easy: it energizes and fills me. For most people, writing is a chore and a hassle. I thank God almost daily for His gift of writing which He gave me as a trust to use on His behalf. What I know is that it is His gift so any credit I take is stolen credit. In fact, the stronger our gifting the more credit we owe our creator who created us in Christ Jesus for good works which He prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10).

Humble individuals are very aware of their gifting. I know that God gave me several strong gifts. I also know that the source of those gifts is Christ. I am deeply thankful for how God gifted and wired me but for me to take credit for those gifts when they came from Him is to delude myself into believing I am the source. It would be like a wealthy father sharing his wealth with a son and the son taking credit for creating the wealth. Our gifting is simply those talents that Jesus talked about in his parable of the talents, given to be used for Him while He is away (Matthew 25).

False humility downplays strengths rather than recognizing them. Genuine humility recognizes those strengths as well as the source of the strengths.

Humble individuals are equally aware of their deficits and weaknesses. Each of us has a few strengths and a multitude of weaknesses. That is why we need others around us who in playing to their strengths can make up for our deficits and we theirs. The best leaders intentionally build leadership teams so that they can play to their strengths and ensure that their areas of weakness are managed by others.

One of my key partners is Gary. While I can envision the future and develop organizational strategy I am not great at working the process to get there. Gary is a master at that. Without Gary my leadership would be much less effective. The same goes for each of the ten individuals on my senior leadership team who have huge strengths in areas where I have little or none. Without them, ReachGlobal would not be what it is.

Leaders who try to go it alone delude themselves into thinking that they are good enough by themselves to accomplish the mission God has given them. I have met some of those leaders. Usually they could be called arrogant. Mostly people don’t like to work directly for them. They may have authority but they do not lead out of deep influence and they often garner more fear than respect.

The heart of humility is that whatever strengths we have were entrusted to us by our creator to use on His behalf. And the realization that in our leadership role we deeply need others and it is “us together” rather than "me" alone. In other words it is not about us! It is about a trust we have been given and a team that we need. When Paul tells us not to think of ourselves more highly than we ought but to think of ourselves with sober judgement he is getting at this truth. It is not a denial of our abilities but recognition that those abilities are a trust and that we need one another.

We often make far too much a distinction between leaders and those they lead - as if the leader is a more valuable player than the individual who works in the trenches. Here is the truth: the only difference between the leader and the line individual is a matter of gifting. Without the person in the trenches the leader would have nothing to lead and without the leader the person in the trenches would not have the leadership that makes the organization as healthy or effective as it could be. Both parties deeply need one another, both are equally critical players and both have been divinely gifted by the creator with different gifts.

This is why I believe it is sinful when leaders do not treat all of those in the organization they lead with great honor. It is equally sinful when those in the organization are carelessly cynical about their leaders – some people are cynical toward all leadership and gladly admit it. In both cases there is a devaluing of individuals and the gifting God has granted to them.

Humble leaders freely give away the credit for success that comes their way and take responsibility for failures when they come. Prideful leaders do just the opposite: they take the praise for success and blame others for failures. Healthy leaders recognize that success is not about them but about the team together. As for failure, they are the leader and while they may quietly hold others accountable there is never public blame or embarrassment.

It is the heart of humility.

Signs that we are not as humble as we think we are or try to portray

We all like to think we are humble and I have met some very humble individuals. I have also met many who think they have humility but whose behaviors would indicate otherwise. Before we take pride in our humility, think about these signs that we might have some work to do. Each of these is about "me" and the more we are about ourselves the less humble we actually are.

• I need to have my own way
• I don't like criticism or pushback
• I get angry easily
• I tell people what to do rather than ask questions
• Accountability irritates me
• I don't listen well
• I marginalize people who disagree with me
• Loyalty to me is a non-negotiable for  staff
• I feel that the rules don't always apply to me
• I blame others for failures and take credit for success
• I exaggerate my accomplishments and resume
• A good idea is my idea
• If necessary I will shade the truth to achieve my goals
• I have an inflated view of my gifts and an inadequate view of my shortcomings
• I treat others as a means to an end rather than with the grace and honor they deserve
• I rarely if ever apologize
• I will only resolve conflict if I believe it will come out in my favor
• I tell people what I want them to know and withhold information I don't want them to know
• I don't treat everyone with honor and respect

Non-defensive living: Nothing to prove, nothing to lose

It is rare to find a truly non defensive individual but where you do you have an easy person to talk to because they have intentionally developed an attitude of nothing to prove, nothing to lose.

If I have nothing to prove, I don't need to be right all the time, I don't need to have all the answers, and I have nothing to be defensive about when I receive a word of criticism or counsel. That does not mean that I must agree with the evaluation being shared but I can evaluate it from a more neutral position because I don't have anything to prove.

Those who have nothing to prove and nothing to lose have open faces that invite conversation and dialogue while those who are defensive have closed faces that say, "don't go there." One invites conversation, the other shuts conversation down - fast.

Defensiveness comes out of two core and unhealthy needs. The need to be right and the need to not lose "face." The need to be right is plain arrogance (none of us are always right) and the need to not lose "face" is simply our pride which is an artificial shell we erect around ourselves to project the image of something we are really not.

Both arrogance and pride are products of our lower nature, are routinely on the list of things God hates (see Proverbs) and are the root of defensive attitudes.

Healthy individuals intentionally cultivate an attitude of nothing to prove, nothing to lose. They are open to criticism or evaluation because they do not feel a need to prove anything and are comfortable enough in their own skin that they are not afraid of losing anything.

It is an attitude of healthy humility that comes out of an inner core of personal confidence, healthy self image and an open spirit. There is no hint of arrogance or pride - thus there is no personal defensiveness.

Think of the people you know well. Which of them respond with openness to suggestions or evaluation? Which of them bristle and shut down the conversation? How do you do in this area?

It is a good mantra to remember: Nothing to prove, nothing to lose.

Why humility is so important in leaders

There are many things that make for a truly good leader but there is one thing that no good leader can do without - humility. Think of how many times humility is referenced in Proverbs.  One cannot be the kind of leader God wants without a great deal of humility.

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom (Proverbs 11:2).

Humility is the fear of the Lord; its wages are riches and honor and life (Proverbs 22:4).

Life is not about me
It is easy for leaders to forget that. Leaders get attention, they often get credit and it is easy to slip into a mindset that life revolves around us. It doesn't even if we think it does. When we live in pride we focus on ourselves. When we live in humility we focus on God and others. There is no leader who has fallen who did not start to believe that life was about them - which is why they got into trouble. 

The ministry I steward is not mine
How big is your church. Tell me about your mission! How subtle it is but how easy it is to start to believe that what we lead is somehow ours. It isn't. It is God's and we are simply stewards on His behalf for His fruit in dependence on His Spirit. We ought to be proud of what God has done and does through the ministry we steward but we cannot allow pride to creep in to the place where we think it is our ministry. Humility reminds us that we steward a ministry or a team for a season and then we pass it on to the next one who will steward it well. 

The team I lead is not there to serve me
Humble leaders serve their team in order for the team to be as successful as it can be and its members as fruitful as they can be. Prideful leaders take their teams for granted and expect that the team is there to serve them. Not so! Jim Collins talks about level five leaders who serve their teams and live with great humility. He is right. It is New Testament leadership where leaders serve rather than are served. Only humility makes that possible.

My ideas are not the only ones that matter
Proud leaders talk a lot. Humble leaders listen a lot. There is no robust dialogue with leaders that think they have a corner on ideas or direction. Only humble leaders are willing to hear things that they don't like to hear, listen to differing points of view and be open to honest feedback. A sign of humility in leadership is the extent that honest, open, candid dialogue can be had - with the leader present and even to him or her. 

The moment I start to believe my own press it becomes about me. When I take credit for what the team has done or what God has done it is about me. As soon as it becomes about me it is no longer about Him. To the extent that I live in humility it is about Him and to the extent that I live in pride it is about me. And it is very easy to slip from humility to pride. It takes a significant effort to stay on the side of humility.

Guarding our humility as leaders

Those who experience some leadership success run the risk of starting to believe their own press. After all, if I can make such successful ministry calls and grow a church, team or organization, I must be pretty good. And the better I think I am , the less likely I am to guard a humble spirit which is at the core of leaders of deep influence. How do we guard a humble heart?

First, always remember that our leadership is not about us. Each of us who leads are in a stewardship role. We steward the mission of the organization, the people who work with us (not for us), the strategies that will get us to success and the resources that are entrusted to us. As soon as we start to believe that it is about us, our leadership capital starts to dry up.

Second, surround yourself with highly competent people who will tell you the truth. Leaders are in a naturally precarious position. Many people will not tell their leaders what they are thinking and many leaders do not like to hear bad news. Some leaders actively work to stifle honest opinions. The result is that leaders often do not hear what they need to hear.

Wise leaders develop an ethos of candid conversation both with those close to them as well as throughout the organization. Sometimes it does not feel good because people can be unloving and critical in their critique but the alternative is to not know what we need to know.

Here is where unhealthy leaders flounder on the shoals. Because they see dissent, criticism or contrary opinions as a personal attack on them they stifle honest, open dialogue. Some actually respond in anger when contrary opinions are voiced. In shutting down conversation out of personal insecurity they both lose the intellectual capital of others and they don’t hear what they really need to hear. It is a net loss for the ministry and an indication that the leader thinks it is about him not the mission.

In our organization we have a rule that no issue is out of bounds for discussion as long as there are not personal attacks or hidden agendas. We don’t want any elephants in the room. At one meeting I was at early in my leadership of ReachGlobal I was told that there were many elephants in the room so I simply said, "lets name them.” The thing about elephants is that once you name them they are not elephants anymore.

Third, listen a lot more than you talk. Insecure leaders talk – a lot. They need to convince themselves and others that they have what it takes to lead although no one is fooled by their verbosity. Some time ago I had a lunch with a new CEO of a major Christian agency of which our organization was a member. In a two hour lunch this CEO asked me one question – at the very end. I walked away thinking, “he is not going to last long because it is all about him – not those he is serving. Within two years he was released from his position.

Listening carefully to others is both a posture and a builder of humility. It says, “I want to hear what you are thinking because you are valuable to this organization.” It indicates an otherness rather than selfishness. It sends a loud message that it is about “us” not “me.” I frequently talk to staff of Christian organizations who tell me that staff meetings are about their leader talking to them, not listening to them. It may be a sign of poor EQ, or insecurity or hubris, but it is not a posture of humility.

Listening also grows humility because we realize that there is a lot of intellectual capital beyond our own that we need to pay attention to. Those who listen well are far more likely to lead well than those who don’t.

Fourth, ask a lot of questions of a lot of people. The best leaders I know cultivate the art of asking questions. They are curious; they want to get into the heads of others. They want to learn and to gain different perspectives. Asking questions sends a strong message, “I don’t have all the answers and you are needed.” Ironically many leaders think that asking questions is a sign of weakness but the opposite is true. It takes a strong, self defined and personally secure leader to ask questions. They don’t need to pretend they have the answers and they are willing to be challenged by others.

In fact, questions work exceedingly well when one is being challenged or even attacked. Rather than bite back and escalate the situation questions can engage and deescalate the conversation. Saying “Talk to me about that” or “Unpack that for me” and “Help me understand your view on that” engage the other individual and keep the connection rather than cutting off the conversation with a rebuttal.

This is where good EQ matters. Internally we may be ready to take a big swipe and the individual may even deserve it. But wise leaders often guard their responses (and mouths) in order to manage what could otherwise be a problematic conversation.

Fifth, serve those who serve you. Leaders of deep influence serve those on their team and help them become the best that they can be as individuals, professionals and as contributors to the common mission. A great orchestra conductor helps to pull the very best music out of the group by coordinating, giving feedback, practicing and encouraging. We will only be as good as the team we lead so helping them become all they can be is foundational to our leadership.

Relationship also matters – not as one of the boys or girls – but genuine concern for those who are part of our staff. Staying connected, showing genuine concern and thanking them appropriately means a lot. People want to know that they are respected, appreciated and that their leader is more than just their leader. It is people who make ministry possible!

Too often leaders who are experiencing success move away from staying close to and serving those they lead. There is a temptation to move toward their own priorities rather than continuing to lead their team. After all, they are now important and influential! This results in a loss of leadership capital as their key team members feel abandoned or undervalued. As long as we lead others, the mission we serve and the people we serve must be our highest work related priority. When our personal success gets in the way of our leadership there is a net loss to that leadership. It has become about “me” not “us.”

Signs of weakness that make for strong spiritual leaders

I doubt a book entitled signs of a weak leader would make the best seller list. Of course, the Scriptures were never that trendy or politically correct and what Jesus and Paul considered good leadership practices are often antithetical to common wisdom. Yet, Paul makes a strong statement that "when I am weak, then I am strong." So what are the signs of weakness that actually bring leadership strength Jesus style?

Dependence
The world celebrates independence while Scripture celebrates dependence on God. When Paul prayed that his thorn in the flesh would be taken away, God said No! It would stay to keep him humble and dependent on Him. Paul got the message and celebrated his weakness because in it he was forced to rely on God's power. Corinthian "pseudo apostles" came in pride and clever words while Paul came in weakness and dependence and the Holy Spirit's power.

Humility
The world celebrates personal power and strength while Scriptures celebrate humility. A humble leader puts himself or herself under the authority of God. They recognize and celebrated the gifts and strengths of others and understand their strengths and weaknesses well and don't pretend to be other than they actually are. Humble leaders don't lead alone but allow the Holy Spirit and others to speak into their leadership.

Service
In the world, leaders are served and fawned upon and often live in a bubble of privilege while in Jesus' Kingdom, leaders serve those they lead to help others be successful. Jim Collins definition of level five leadership in Good to Great redefined leadership along New Testament lines. My leadership is only as good as my service to those I lead and the staff who work under my stewardship.

Meekness
In the world, leaders are celebrated who exert power and authority while the Scriptures celebrated those who exhibit meekness. One of the better definitions of meekness is "power under control." It includes submission to God, teachability, patience in suffering, gentleness, kindness and not needing to platform oneself. Meek leaders are leaders without guile or selfish agenda.

Truth 
The world often celebrates and practices versions of truth designed to strengthen one's position while Scripture celebrates true truth because God is a God of truth. This often means saying things that are hard, admitting that one was wrong, and avoiding spin which is a redefinition of truth (or untruth). Spiritual leaders are not afraid of truth.

Stewardship
In the world, leadership is often about me. In the Kingdom, leadership is about Him and serving His interests and leading as He would lead. It is leadership as a stewardship which is not about us but about leading on His behalf. It reflects a conviction that life is not about us but about Him and His interests.

Weakness can in fact be strength. We can be strong leaders by the definition of the world or by the definition of the Kingdom.Which definition are you leading with?

It's a level playing field

Over lunch recently a friend said to me "You are very important leading an international mission! How do you do all the things you do?" I looked at him and said, "I could never do what you do, how do you do it? (he ministers to gangsters in Hong Kong and is on staff on a church full of former and current Triad members, prostitutes and redeemed underworld figures - many very much in process). 

None of are more important than others in God's kingdom. In the world there is a pecking order based on titles, salaries and perceived importance. In the Kingdom all of us are simply asked to live out the gifting and calling that He has gifted and called us to. That is why what I do is not hard - for me! That is why what my friend does is not hard - for him! In fact, in the Kingdom, those who would be great become servants like Jesus. In His economy the last shall be first and the first shall be last.

We have different roles but we have equal value. We have different giftings but we have equal importance. We need to honor each one in God's kingdom for each is indispensable to what He wants to accomplish. There is no A team and B team: only His team. When we give undue honor to some and not to others we miss the values of His kingdom where the playing field is level and everyone is needed! This is just one of many areas where the values of our world are opposite of the values of the Kingdom.

An audience of One

Have you ever thought about how much time and energy we expend in trying to live up to the expectations of others? Authenticity means that we no longer need to work to prove something but that we can simply be who God made us to be and our highest goal is not to please people but to please an audience of One – our Father. Again, that is freedom!

With humility comes a nothing to prove, nothing to lose view of life which leads to authentic living. Authentic living is about being who God created us to be and not a pretend us or someone else’s version for us whether they be our parents, our in laws, or others. The question is no longer what I have to do to please other people but what I need to do to please God.

I remember the pressure I felt as a young pastor to be whatever a pastor is supposed to be. I put expectations on myself and others put expectations on me and pretty soon it was hard to be me. I worried too much about what people would or did think. I took certain peoples criticisms too deeply. I felt like a failure too often. I had something to prove and a lot to lose which is not a fun way to live life.

My main question today is what do I need to do to please the Father. Not only will I not please everyone else but that is not the call on my life – or yours. Pleasing the Father is. His priorities for my life, time, energies and heart are what count. He is the One we will give account to one day. No one else’s opinions will matter on that day.

The humility to be just us

The real, unadorned, us! Are you comfortable with you? Do you try to hide the real you out of fear for what people will think or see? Or are you OK with how God made you and not trying to be something you are not?

Good questions. Paul wrote "For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly then you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you."

Paul writes this in the context of a discussion of spiritual gifts in Romans 12 where he makes the point that humility is needed because each of us has a unique set of gifts and by definition whatever gifts we don't have are weaknesses. I have three strong strengths: everything else is a weakness. Thus by definition I need others because my gift set is a narrow one - as is yours.

Pride places undue emphasis on me. Humility places proper emphasis on the gifting we have been given and the necessity of having others around us to be all we can be - together. It is not about me! It is about us - together.

This means I don't have to pretend to be something I am not. I know God has gifted me in certain areas and others in other areas and it is the combined gifting that makes for the healthy whole. It means that we can be comfortable in our own skin, knowing that God made us the way he did for a reason.

Walking in humility also means that I will not seek to be something God did not make me to be - in other words I will understand my gifting and wiring and stay in the zone of strength that God gave me. When we move out of our zone of strength we often have to pretend - because we are not walking in the gifting that God actually gave us. Wise men and women use the "sober judgement" Paul speaks of to understand where they can and will be successful given the gifts God granted them and then seek to stay in that zone - in humility and self confidence, knowing they are in the right spot.

Humility and self knowledge lead wise men and women to build ministry teams of gifted individuals so that the deficits of one can be made up by the gifts of others. And, they are not afraid to admit areas of weakness and the need for the help of others. Pride does not ask for help in an area of weakness. Humility does. Pride does not bring other gifted people around us, humility does. Pride turns the spotlight on us, Humility turns it on the group. Pride says, I am good at all things, Humility says I am good at some things.

How are you walking today? In humility - being the real you - or pride - trying to be the you God did not make you to be?

The EQ factor in the leadership equation

Good leaders have good EQ! They understand its implications, know themselves and tendencies for good and bad, manage their shadow side, are open to input, are non defensive, empathetic and always growing their Emotional Intelligence. 

I am convinced that poor EQ is responsible for more poor leadership behaviors more than any other single factor. One can understand leadership principles, have vision and be able to deliver on it but if one has poor EQ, that one factor will significantly get in the way of their leadership because it negatively impacts those around them.

One must have a desire to grow their EQ but it is not without cost. It means that we are willing to confront, accept and deal with our shadow side. I spoke with leader recently who said, for years people would say he was intimidating and he always figured it was their problem until one day he accepted the fact that it was indeed how he was often perceived and started to manage the behaviors that caused the negative reaction to his communication style.

Here is the reason that many don't grow their EQ. It means that we have to listen to others and hear things about ourselves that we don't want to hear. It means that we must be willing to own the truth of those parts of our behaviors that hurt others and finally it means that we need to manage our behaviors so that they don't negatively impact others. Of course, we become better people, better leaders and are a lot easier to work with when we do.

At its root, good EQ is all about humility. The humility to hear, to learn to modify our behaviors and to not need to be right or to guard our pride and reputation. At its root, bad EQ is often about pride - the defenses we put up so that we don't have to confront the real us. That is why the best leaders are always humble leaders. Humility is the necessary ingredient to face truth in our lives and to commit ourselves to personal growth.

The irony in not owning up to our dark side is that it is not a secret to others. We are the only ones who don't get it. Those around us get it well as they must live with its consequences on their lives. Thus we lose nothing by acknowledging our deficits and working to manage them. In fact, our openness to our weaknesses brings the respect of others. Transparency is a valued asset in leadership.

The test of a leader's humility and openness

Both in my consulting role and my organizational leadership role I work with team leaders and their direct reports. One of the things I am always looking for is how honest, candid, direct and transparent team members can be with their leader. It is a barometer of several things: the health of the senior leader; the health of the team and the health of the organization as a whole.

How is this a barometer of the leader? Let's be candid. The only reason that certain issues cannot be discussed with freedom with a leader, whether in a group setting or one on one is that the leader's insecurities prevent it. To the extent that I as a leader am unwilling to hear candid feedback from others on any topic, the gaps in my own emotional intelligence are showing. Obviously I have something to lose by discussing the issue or have something to prove by being right on the issue. 

Leaders set the culture of openness or lack of it for their team. In our organization we have a stated goal that there are no elephants that cannot be named (elephants are issues that people are afraid to bring up). Once named it is not an elephant anymore but simply an issue to be discussed and resolved. We also operate by a motto of "nothing to prove and nothing to lose." If I have nothing to prove or lose I am free to hear whatever my team wants to discuss without needing to be defensive or right.

How is the the barometer of the health of a team? Very simply, when a team cannot engage in robust dialogue where any issue can be put on the table with the exception of personal attacks and hidden agendas, it cannot maximize its effectiveness. This is because it is often the topics that are off limits are the very topics that must be resolved if the ministry is going to be all that it can be. Every issue that cannot be discussed is an issue that will hold the ministry back in some area. 

I suggest that teams operate by a team covenant which spells out how they operate with one another, the ability to be candid and define the culture by which they will operate. Healthy teams deliver healthy ministry.

It should be obvious by now how this is a barometer of an organization as a whole: Healthy organizations are open, candid and humble organizations who are always looking to improve their return on mission and invite their staff to help figure that out. Closed organizations are fearful organizations. Open organizations are free and therefore invite the best from their staff in ideas, dialogue, feedback, innovation and synergy.

How well are you doing in the area of humility and openness. Can you talk about it as a team?

The value of outside input into our ministries

This week I spent four days with key staff and an outside consultant probing areas of necessary growth and development for our organization. As one who does a fair amount of consulting I know the value of an outside voice that asks good questions, challenges the status quo and can help a ministry team think outside their usual parameters. They also bring the dimension of knowledge of what others are doing.


Too often in ministry we isolate ourselves out of fear (what if others discover what I don't know) or out of hubris (we don't need outside help). In either case we and our ministry loses. Humility and a commitment to learn is the attitude of healthy leaders and  they welcome the voices of others who can challenge prevailing thinking, ask the hard why questions, clarify issues that are not truly clear and help develop new ways of thinking, new tools for success and in doing so bring new insights to the table.


A consultant can be a fellow pastor or ministry leader that you respect and who has obvious expertise. It can be someone who you pay for their services. In my case, it is someone who normally consults for large businesses  in lean manufacturing and lean management who is helping us with what we call a Ministry Excellence initiative. We pay the going rate for his services and have over the past two years of relationship benefited immensely.


Humble leaders and organizations are committed to continuous learning, regular evaluation, ministry results, clarity of purpose, healthy teams and culture - all for the sake of seeing a maximum return on mission for Jesus and the mission He has called us to. 


To those who have never had an outside voice speak into your ministry I would say, overcome your fear or pride and try it. You will be surprised by the insights you gain and the ideas that are generated. All of us get stuck in our own ruts, habits, and assumptions. An outside voice can help you find new paths.

Self Knowledge and leadership

Few skills are as critical for a leader as that of accurate self-knowledge. I stress the word accurate because all of us have a view of ourselves but that view is not always accurate. When it is not accurate we often get in the way of ourselves.


What does self knowledge entail? First it means that we know what our strengths are. Each of us has two to three strengths where we shine and everything else is a weakness. If we can identify our strengths we have also by default identified our weaknesses (everything else). Humility is knowing how God designed us and giving him the credit. And, understanding how badly we need others to compensate for our weaknesses.


Second, self knowledge means that we understand the shadow side of our strengths. Every strength has a shadow side. Three of my five strengths identified by Strenghfinders are strategic, maximizer and achiever. They are a powerful combination. However, their shadow side can include a lack of patience and irritation when others don't move as quickly as I would want them to, or "get it" when the answer seems so simple.


Understanding our shadow side allows us to manage it. We cannot change how we are wired but we can manage our attitudes and behaviors so that our shadow side does not impede our leadership by negatively impacting those around us.


This goes to the third area of self knowledge - understanding how we are perceived by others and how our wiring impacts them. One of the ways that leaders get themselves into trouble is when they don't understand how others perceive them. They may think that they are decisive, for instance but others read them as arrogant. They may want a harmonious relationship with everyone but it is read as lacking clarity because different things are said to different people in order to please them.


The gap between our perception of ourselves and others perception of us is what we need to be aware of. Often we can learn something from testing where both the strengths and shadow side are identified which can give us clues to how others might see us. Feedback from others whom we trust is also a critical factor which means that we must be open and non-defensive about that feedback. The smaller the gap between our perception of ourselves and others perceptions of us, the better we can lead.


The fourth area of self knowledge is understanding our vulnerabilities to sin and when they are most likely to show up. We are vulnerable in different ways and different circumstances and a keen awareness of those ways and circumstances allows us to put in place safeguards to keep us from the "roaring lion that seeks to destroy us." 


Self knowledge requires introspection and a desire to understand ourselves fully. Some won't go there because it makes us uncomfortable. Henry Nouwen said that the reason many of us don't like silence is that it is in that place we see the scaffolding of our lives the most clearly - and there are parts of that scaffolding that we don't like. Yet, the path to health is understanding our dishealth as much as our strengths. 


For leaders, self knowledge is a high priority. It impacts themselves and those they lead.

Organizational pride and humility

Pride is not only an issue for individuals but for organizations as well. Ministries can be prideful or humble and while it is not always seen on the inside, it is usually evident from the outside.


Take a church, for instance, that experienced great success in its past. It was well known and looked up to. Years later when it has passed its prime the leaders and congregation still think of themselves as "that" church that had once been - proud of who they are when in fact they are long past that era and in serious need of change and renovation. What keeps them from that change? Pride!


Organizations tuat are proud become organizations that stop learning, listening to others, and become stuck in whatever era it was that saw their greatest success. Humble organizations are the opposite. They know they have a lot to learn, know that times and circumstances change and are always looking for ways to learn and grow.


Pride is as destructive to ministry organizations as it is to individuals. It inflates importance and therefore decreases a humble attitude of learning,. It overvalues itself and undervalues others. In doing so it becomes insular and sees no need to cooperate with others. After all, it has a corner on the ministry market. 


And it is a dangerous place to be because that corner is an illusion and the moment we stop learning, cooperating and valuing others our own decline is set in motion. We may not know it for a number of years but it will set in. 


I want the organization I lead to be the best that it can be. But that best is predicated on being a humble, learning, cooperating, giving and servant organization. Pride destroys effectiveness while humility promotes it.

Pedestals are dangerous places to be and to prop up

One of the risks of Christian leadership is that others often put them on  a pedestal, looking up to that leader as if they were from another species, seeing only the good stuff and none of the bad stuff. It really is a bad place to be for any number of reasons, least of which is that when the pedestal breaks it is painful for both the leaders and those who put them there. 

I also know leaders who love to be on the pedestal. They like the adulation, the otherness and the position it gives them. And, it insulates them from much of the scrutiny because the more removed they are the less others are able to challenge them. You don't say honest or hard things to unapproachable people - like leaders who foster a certain elevation from others. 

My advice to those who work for leaders who like the pedestal is that one does not treat them with deference, but like everyone else.  They may not like it but allowing them to be treated as special only feeds the unhealthy side of their leadership. I resolved long ago that I would always be respectful but never feed the egos of unhealthy leaders.

For the rest of us who may be put on pedestals by others, I have four suggestions. First, be candid about those things you can be candid about. We have the same struggles as everyone else. Being honest about those struggles helps others understand we are not different.

Second, be approachable. The more approachable we are the more human we will be while the more unapproachable we are the more "otherness" we foster. Let people get to know you as much as possible.

Third, be real. Pretense is dishonesty while just being real about who we are is honesty. The more transparent we are, the more human we are and the less others will elevate us.

Fourth, be humble. Humility is self effacing while pride elevates self. 

I have a good friend about whom people say, "He is without guile." I love that description. It is who I want to be. As such, I will not cooperate with anyone who wants to live on a pedestal or put me on one (God forbid).

Pride and Christian Leadership

Personal pride and Christian leadership are fundamentally incompatible with one another. 

Signs of pride are easy to spot:

• Loving the praise we get from others
• Name dropping - we are on the in with the big shots
• Letting others know how big and successful our ministries are
• Not listening to others - we have the answers
• Letting others know we are in charge
• Taking credit for success
• Blaming others for failure
• Ignoring our shadow side
• Narcissism (there is a lot of it in Christian leadership) 
• Elevating ourselves
• Defensiveness (pride central)
• Putting others down

Think about this: Pride elevates self but we are to elevate Jesus. Pride says "I accomplished this" when in reality anything of spiritual significance was accomplished by God's power. Pride says, "I made something of myself" when in fact God gave us our skills and wiring as a gift to be used for Him. Pride thinks that our success is a reflection of our greatness when in effect, it is simply a gift from God.

If anyone had a right to pride it was Jesus but where do you see it? He claimed to speak the words of the Father, do the will of the Father and gave all the glory to the Father. He lived for the Father's glory rather than His own. When His disciples vied for position and glory He rebuked them saying that they were living by the world's values not kingdom values. 

The life of Jesus was one of humble dependence and servant leadership. Paul had the same mindset committed to boasting about one thing only - the cross of Christ. He took no credit for his accomplishments, great as they were but gave all the credit to God. He knew that "when he was weak, then he was strong," because it was all about God's power, not his wisdom or power. 

Why is there so much pride, so many egos and may I say it, narcissism among Christian leaders? It does not square with the life of Jesus or the life of Paul or the teaching of Scripture. We are nothing without God. My ability to write blogs and books is simply a gift I have been given. The leadership skills I have were also a gift from God to be used in trust for Him. What do I have to boast about except that God was gracious to me? And if I do take the credit am I not stealing credit from the One who rightly deserves all of it?

It is no wonder that many Christian leaders have major blow ups in their lives and ministries. Pride elevates self and minimizes Jesus and the greater the elevation of ourselves and the minimization of Jesus the more dangerous territory we are in. Narcissism is the ultimate elevation of self and rejection of Him. Once it becomes about us we have lost all ability to lead on His behalf. It is not that God abandons us, we have abandoned Him for all practical purposes.

It was pride that caused Satan to rebel against God. It was pride that prompted Adam and Eve to eat of the tree. It is pride that causes us to elevate ourselves but to the extent we do we are minimizing God. And that is a dangerous path to walk. Our hearts are indeed deceitful above all things. Guarding our hearts against pride is job one of anyone in Christian leadership. 

Bride over Brand

This week I had a remarkable set of meetings with 20 movement leaders in Africa. All of them represented different denominations and countries and all of them were together for a week to discuss how they could work synergistically together to send missionaries, see church planters trained and to reach those parts of Africa where the gospel has not penetrated.

What is remarkable is that they were placing the Bride (the church of Jesus) over their particular brand (denomination). 

Bride over Brand is a mindset that should pervade all of our efforts to spread the Gospel. This does not mean that we must give up the distinctives of our brand. It does mean that we are willing to actively cooperate with others for a higher goal of seeing the Bride expand, knowing that our brand is one small expression of the Bride that Jesus died for.

This takes a mindset that "we will cooperate rather than compete." It is a humble posture that knows that no one of us can do this by ourselves and that we have a lot to learn from others. It is a kingdom rather than a provincial mindset that places the Bride in its proper perspective. It is a Jesus mindset above all that values what He values - that all men might come to believe. 

I long for the day when this kind of mindset prevails across Christianity. When it does, we will see the Gospel spread in ways that we cannot imagine. Until it does, we will continue to do our own thing, not realizing that we are better together than separate. 

What is your mindset? What are you doing about it?