When God gives us a full cup to hold

Full cups of anything are hard to hold, my steaming cup of coffee in the morning for instance, without spilling. Many of us hold full cups of something which are trusts from God. It may be a full cup of success, or of responsibility, or of money, it could be a full cup of suffering, or of significant gifting, or maybe wisdom or even vision. Whatever it is, we know the cup is full and others know the cup is full and we must decide how we are going to handle that full cup.

Full cups are made to be held with a steady hand. 

A steady hand comes from a quiet settled confidence that what we hold is from the hand of God and we hold it on His behalf. It is not for us to be proud as it did not come from us. It is not ours to be used indiscriminately as we hold it in trust. 

Steady hands understand the source of what they hold in their cup and the one they hold it for. 

What do you hold in your cup and how well are you holding it?

What does it mean to be ready for death?

No this is not a macabre subject, at least for those who are Christ followers. Nor is this a blog for senior citizens. The truth is that our time on earth is but a speck of the time we will have in eternity. 

The other truth is that there is a paper thin line between life and eternity and although we all expect and hope to live to a ripe old age, we know that is not always reality either. I know this from experience having been on the precipice of death at ages 51 and 52. The line came so close for me on several occasions that the paddles were out, the crash cart there and I hung by a thread between time and eternity - for days.

I have two dear friends right now who will slip through the veil in the next days or weeks. And I have a list of people now at 56 with whom I will be reunited on that day when I too slip through the veil.

Which leads me to a question. What does it mean for us to be ready for death? It is, after all a part of life and it is the close of one chapter and the opening of another chapter so amazing that there are not adequate words in the New Testament to describe it - only glimpses. But if Jesus is everything and if we will spend eternity with He who is everything, I guess that sums up what we need to know. 

The problem is that we don't know the day or the hour when we will close this chapter and open the next so living in light of eternity means that we are ready for those two chapters to collide and for us to go from one to the other. 

So what does it mean for us to be ready for death, for eternity, for that moment when life and eternity intersect just long enough for us to move from one to the other?

Readiness means that we don't fear death. We may not like the process but for believers death holds a promise of something far greater than we have ever experienced or could ever imagine. Fear of death is really the result of an inadequate understanding of God and His Word. Those of us who fear death need to study the promises of God on death and eternal life. 

Readiness means that we don't leave unfinished business. I am not talking about the unfinished building project or things that can be picked up by others. I do mean relationships that we wished we had fixed, priorities we should have pursued, family we should have spent time with, obedience we should have paid better attention to. We don't want loose ends that we wish we had tied up when we are moments from eternity.

Readiness means that we don't so overvalue life and undervalue eternity that we and our family cannot make the adjustment to our going. Death is hard for those we leave behind, not for those who enter Christ's presence. But just as we must not fear death, so they must not fear it either and in their sorrow for loss, rejoice in the gain of those who are now in the presence of Jesus. I grieve for families that live in depression and diminished life for years after a loved one has died. If they only had a glimpse of the other side of the veil they would be rejoicing even in their loss.

Readiness means that I want to leave an example of a life well lived and a death well died that comes out of a deep followership of Christ and faith in all of His promises. Eternity is about legacy that we leave behind for our families, friends, and colleagues. It is about an example that we can follow. Every day I think of friends who have gone before me and the example they left in how they lived and how they died. Those examples are like channel markers for me to do the same. I want it to be said that I ran the race well and that in the end with eternity in front of me, I finished the race well.

Death comes to all of us. We all face that journey. How we face it makes a great difference to us and to others.

Forgiveness and legacy

Our ability to either forgive or not forgive those who have wronged us has a direct impact on our legacy. True legacy is not about the success we have accomplished as it is about lives we have impacted.

When we refuse to forgive someone who has wronged us we rob ourselves of the ability to influence or impact them. And we live in the prison of our own unforgiveness because what we cannot forgive we cannot let go of.

The greatest pain I ever encountered was pain inflicted by an individual who over a period of years caused huge emotional turmoil, caused me to leave my job and spread lies and untruths that were deeply hurtful. It was a situation that left me clinically depressed, deeply discouraged, emotionally wounded and my life dreams shattered.

From a human perspective, if anyone did not deserve my forgiveness it was this individual who had violated me so greatly in many ways. He did not deserve to be forgiven, nor did he ever attempt to make things right. But I was left with a dilemma. As long as I held on to the hurt and offense that had been committed, I could not move beyond the pain he had caused.

If, on the other hand, I was willing to offer what he did not deserve, my forgiveness, I could move beyond the prison of the pain, allow that chapter of my life to become a part of my history rather than my present and allow that history to contribute to my personal growth, future difficult people I encountered and mold my character. It is a dilemma all of us face when others have hurt us.

Forgiving this individual in my own heart was one of the hardest things I ever did. The pain he had caused was so severe. But, once I took that step, I was on a journey toward freedom from that pain, even though it took years to finish. Had I not taken that step I would still be imprisoned by bitterness and the memories. Today neither have a hold on my life and the experience has molded me in numerous ways.

When we choose to forgive we not only do what Jesus told us to do but we release the hold that those who have wronged us have on our lives. And, in releasing the bitterness and pain we give God the opportunity to redeem the pain by turning it into ways that God can use it in our lives and in the lives of others.

When we choose not to forgive, we continue to allow those who wronged us to affect our lives negatively (effectively they continue to have power over us) and we prevent God from redeeming the pain and turning it into legacy.

Ministry gives plenty of opportunities to forgive "each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Every time we do that we live as Jesus lived and a bit of grace falls on those we forgive. And, we free ourselves from the possibility of bitterness which will lead us into bondage. Life is not fair - and God often uses the unfairness of life to build our own character and legacy. The issue is not whether we have been treated fairly, it is how will we respond when it happens.

Take a moment and write down the names those who you have not forgiven. Are you willing to forgive them today so that you can live in freedom and allow God to turn their offense into a part of your life’s legacy?

The one thing that can change everything in ministry impact

We are always looking for ways to change the equation in local church ministry. While there are many things we can do to increase our impact there are a handful of things that the New Testament tells us are essential to do. 

One of them can change everything: helping God's people reclaim their God given call and potential in ministry: To develop, empower and release people to use their skills and gifts to advance His kingdom in their circles of influence.

The heart of our call as church leaders is to see all of God's people join Him in meaningful ministry. "So Christ himself gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up (Ephesians 4:11-12)." It is my conviction and I believe the New Testament teaching and example that our congregations will have impact for the Gospel to the extent that God's people are using their gifts and skills on His behalf.

Here are several ways to help make this a reality in the local church.

First, we need to create an expectation in line with Ephesians 2:10 that we were created by God for specific works and He wants us to join Him in His work to "destroy the devils work" (1 John 3:8) on our planet and bring the hope and restoration of the Gospel (Romans 1:16-17) that changes lives in God's power. None of God's people are exempt from that expectation and call.

Second, we need to reclaim the priesthood of all believers as the theology behind the expectation. One of the dysfunctions of the church is professional ministry where we hire staff to do the work of ministry and ask for people to assist. How would life look different if we understood that we are all called, all given specific gifts by the Holy Spirit and all of us God's staff! Practice follows a proper understanding of theology and this is a theology that needs to be understood by God's people.

Third, it is powerful to tell stories of how God is using regular people in significant but ordinary ways to share the Good News, be agents of compassion and help, infuse their workplaces and neighborhoods with His love and live out the good works Jesus created us for. Stories make the theology practical and doable. They encourage others that God can use them in significant ways by simply living out God's call on their lives.

Fourth, we need to make it practical in our teaching and preaching. God changes the world by ordinary people doing ordinary things in the power of God's Spirit in their circles of influence. We need to communicate this theology that God can and does use ordinary people to accomplish His work: "Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong (1 Corinthians 1:26-27)."

Fifth we must redefine ministry. Ministry is not simply what happens in the church but it is living out God's call in each of our unique places and circles of influence. For some, most of their ministry will be outside of the church. Keeping it inside the church is the reason we have so little impact in our communities.

Finally we need to tell God's meta story of a world undone which God intents to make whole again through His death and resurrection and his return with a new heavens and new earth. In the meantime we are His agents of heaven to bring the hope and truth and love of Jesus to all places where we intersect. It is the fulfillment of the Lord's prayer, "Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven (Matthew 6:9-10)." We are His agents to bring bits of heaven to earth as we live out our followership faithfully.

Our passion ought to be to see all of God's people find fulfillment in their lives and work as they become His ambassadors in ordinary places, in ordinary ways with results that are extraordinary because the Holy Spirit has infused our efforts with His power.

Life is a pursuit: we are all chasing something

Life is a pursuit. We have dreams, goals, desires, inner drives, and our own dysfunctions and pride that all contribute to whatever it is that we are pursuing. Understanding what we are chasing is a complex undertaking. But we are all chasing something!

In his advice to his protegee, Timothy, the Apostle Paul gives him some clear and salient counsel about those things he should chase. "But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith...(1 Timothy 6:11:-12)."

What he was to flee from is exactly what the world chases after - the love of money, discontentment, the "foolish and harmful desires" that drive so many. What he was to chase after were the spiritual qualities that define a person who looks like Jesus. We are all chasing something. Paul says be clear about what you are chasing and make sure that it is worthy of the chase.

We are defined by what we pursue in life. Chase the wrong things and we are like those Paul talks about who have "pierced themselves with many griefs (1 Timothy 6:10). 

In the end it is a person who defines our pursuit: God! Paul trips over his words to try to define the only one worthy of our pursuit. "God, the blessed and only Ruler, the King of kings and Lord of lords, who alone is immortal and who lives in unapproachable light, whom no one has seen or can see. To him be honor and might forever. Amen (1 Timothy 6:15-16).

What or whom are you chasing today? If you lead others, your chase will impact everyone you lead. 

Leaders must lead from the front in these areas

For all the talk about leadership today, staff members don’t listen as much as they watch – and consciously or unconsciously follow the example of their leader. The rhetoric of leaders only matters when the words and the practices of leaders are in alignment. If not in alignment, it will be the practices that are most often followed.

There are some areas, therefore, where leaders must lead from the front. Leading from the front is not about what we say but what we practice in some key areas of our lives. It is these practices which give our leadership moral integrity with our staff. And without this moral integrity, we will not have the influence we need to lead in ministry, no matter how gifted we are.

Here are some questions that healthy leaders ask themselves on a regular basis. And where they catch themselves slipping they deal with it – their leadership depends on it.

Am I living with personal integrity?

Personal integrity is present when my beliefs match my practice – when my theology matches my lifestyle. As Paul told Timothy, “watch your life and your doctrine closely.” This matters in both our private and public lives because lack of alignment will eventually show itself in our character – even if we have tried to keep it hidden.

Personal emotional health is directly connected to the alignment of our stated beliefs and our personal practices. We are only whole as leaders when our beliefs match our practices. It matters.

Do I keep my word?

Words matter. They are powerful indicators of our character because they either point toward character or away from character depending on our propensity to keep our word or not. Promises not kept are deadly for moral integrity. As Jesus said, “Let your yes be yes and your no be no.” It is better to say nothing than to promise something one does not intend to follow through on.

A key component in keeping our word is that of being clear about what we believe and what we intend to do. When a leader, in the desire to be popular is not honest about her or his intentions, they are not being honest and will inevitably be seen as not having kept their word.

Do I model healthy relationships?

Few things get in the way of healthy ministry more than unhealthy relationships: ongoing unresolved conflict; treating people with disrespect; lack of fairness; using people for our purposes or lack of empathy.

Staff members are acutely aware of whether their leader treats people well or not – regardless of whether they are above them, at their level or below them in the organizational chart. Few things will erode moral authority more than poor treatment of people and conversely few things will develop loyalty and respect as healthy relationships.

Do I keep organizational commitments and live the mission?

Every organization has a set of commitments, values or practices that it expects its staff to keep along with a mission that it is living out. One of the reasons that values, guiding principles or expected practices are not lived out is when staff do not see their leaders living them out.

For instance, a pastor might be adamant that his staff be loyal to him and support him but they know that he is not loyal to his board or support them. The lack of alignment between expectations and practice on the part of the leader undermine his moral authority with his staff. Staff will only take organizational expectations seriously when they see that their leader never compromises them themselves.

Am I open?

Leaders who are approachable and open, even when staff may disagree with them model an undefensive spirit that is a key component to a healthy organization. All too often, however, leaders feel that disagreement equals disloyalty (in fact, staff members who are willing to tell you the truth as they see it are actually the most loyal – if they have the best interests of you and the organization in mind). Lack of openness creates a climate of intimidation and fear within an organization where staff members know they cannot be honest.

Healthy leaders display an attitude of “nothing to prove, nothing to lose,” and are open to different ideas, constructive criticism and robust dialogue.

These five questions, asked of ourselves regularly, can ensure that we lead with the moral authority needed for long term success in a healthy environment. What we model as leaders is more important than what we espouse because when there is a conflict between the two, what we model is what our staff will believe.

Understanding what truly motivates us in ministry

For those of us who lead others in ministry, understanding what motivates us and drives us is a complicated but important question. There are many possible answers to even ministry motivation. They can include joining God in His work, our own ego, recognition, the applause of others, fulfilling someone else's motivations, personal ambition, or just wanting to be successful. On any given day or period in our lives, the answer could be different. 

Every leader is building something. That is the nature of leadership. Who we are building for is a far trickier question. Here is the issue that should give us pause. The pull of our lower nature is strong and when we are not highly sensitive both to the call of God on our lives and are not intentionally staying in close fellowship with Him, our inner motivations gravitate toward us and our own fulfillment rather than keeping Him and His call preeminent in our leadership. In other words, it is very easy for us to be meeting our own needs in our Spiritual leadership rather than leading on His behalf. It is a subtle but massive shift in motivation.

Why does it matter? Because we lead people toward the individual we lead for. If we are truly motivated by God's call and mission we will lead people on behalf of and toward Him! If we are actually motivated by our own ambition and a personal mission we will lead people on behalf of and toward us. Thus the motivations of our hearts have very real consequences for those who we lead. It is a subtle but it is real!

How do we know what really motivates us? It takes a great deal of introspection, thought, personal evaluation and being aware of our own drives and needs as they intersect with God's call on our lives. Ultimately the closer we stay to Jesus, the more sensitive we will be to Him. When we become distracted from Jesus (even by ministry) we become less sensitive to His call and are easily diverted by our own "shadow mission." It is possible to start our leadership with high sensitivity to leading on His behalf but over time to allow it to become about us rather than Him. 

Never take your motivations for granted. We are all building something and motivated by something. Knowing who we are actually building for and whose motivations we are fulfilling is vitally important. We don't want to get to the end and realize we were chasing the wrong thing. Our hearts are deceitful and we are easily deceived unless we are constantly being transformed by Jesus.