Growing my faith in the face of death. Tim Keller in the Atlantic Magazine

 

A very poignant and transparent article from Tim Keller in the Atlantic

Growing My Faith in the Face of Death

I spent a lifetime counseling others before my diagnosis. Will I be able to take my own advice?

The ONE thing I look forward to the moment I die and it will be my greatest moment of freedom and joy

Death stirs all kinds of emotions for us. Even as believers the unknown causes us anxiety. I say that with some experience as I have faced death several times and looked it the face with realism and all the emotions that accompany that experience. In two instances I was pretty sure my earthly existence was over. In another I knew it could be. What I say I don't say lightly. It has come with great pain and struggle physically and emotionally!

So it is something I have thought about a lot. And in many ways it has been a gift. The question is, how can we welcome something we don't look forward to? I hope to live a long time but I look forward to one moment that will be the best moment of my existence.

It is not death.

It is the moment I look for the first time into the eyes of Jesus who I will meet the instant I leave this life and enter the next.

Think for a moment of what eyes tell you. You look into the eyes of another and you see a piece of their soul. That is why lovers look into the eyes of the one they love. Eyes show love, amazement, anger, mercy, cynicism and whatever is in the mind of the one whose eyes you are looking at. 

I believe there will be no more amazing and life changing moment than that instant when I look into the eyes of my Savior for the first time. He is described in the book of Revelation this way: "And among the lampstands was someone 'like a son of man dressed in a robe reaching down to his feet and with a golden sash around his chest. His head and hair were white like wool, as white as snow, and his eyes were like blazing fire. His feet were like bronze glowing in a furnace, and his voice was like the sound of rushing waters. In his right hand he held seven stars, and out of his mouth came a sharp double edged sword.. His face was like the sun shining in all its brilliance'" (Revelation 1:13-16)

It is One like no other! This is the One who created me. This is the One who loved me when I didn't deserve love. This is the One who rescued me and paid for my sin. This is the One who sustained me through ever moment of my life. This is the One who adopted me and gave me all the amazing gifts listed in Ephesians 1 and 2. This is the One who gave me mercy, grace, forgiveness, redemption, sanctification and His Spirit through no merit of my own. None!

What will I see? It cannot be described but I will do my best. I will see in His eternal eyes the most amazing love, forgiveness, truth, compassion, understanding, grace, mercy, loving kindness, holiness and acceptance that I have ever longed for. I will know that I am home. I will know that I am eternally loved. I will know that for the first time in my life all is truly well and always will be. I will know that I am home with the One I was made for.

At that moment the struggles which have plagued me will be forever gone. The sins that beset me will be forever forgotten. The pain I have experienced will be fully released. The fears I have lived with will be forever gone. All I will have left is the freedom that we were originally made for. I will also know that everything I have endured for His sake will be worth it. His eyes will say it all. Any words of His will strike my heart like lightning as they will be words of complete love for He made me for Himself. 

I cannot know how I will respond. How does one respond in the presence of God? I know it will not be fear for fear will be banished along with tears and sorrow and pain and heartache. As the song asks, will I dance for him, fall on my face for him, or have any words to say to Him? All I know is that in that moment I will fully understand what I have tried to understand this side of life - fully. He will be everything I need, my heart will be fully at peace and every struggle completed, every desire fulfilled, every yearning completed. For the first time in my existence ALL will be well and I will be complete. 

What do I look forward to when He brings me home? I just want to look into the eyes of Jesus. Everything else will be extra including eternity with Him and with His family. I know that the moment His eyes meet mine, all will be different. At that moment He will wipe the tears from my eyes - regrets, sin, pain, disappointment, unfulfilled dreams, the love I didn't give or receive and it will be well with my soul - forever. Freedom and joy forever. 

Posted from Oakdale, MN

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Interview with Steve Hayner of InterVarsity and Columbia Seminary: People tend to die like they've lived.

Died: Steve Hayner, Former President of InterVarsity and Columbia Seminary

"As a pastor I’ve observed that people tend to die like they’ve lived. Most people will face death in the same way they have faced other things in their lives. Anyone who knows you or Sharol would say this process feels as though this is exactly how you would go through this time."

Steve Hayner interview

"Life is the most irreplaceable and fundamental condition of the human experience"

Joni Eareckson Tada to Brittany Maynard: God alone chooses the

day you die, not you

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

The Death of believers

In recent months I have seen a number of loved ones die as well as watched other friends struggle with what could be terminal illnesses. Even when death comes at an old age it is a sad thing. There will be no more conversations, shared memories or friendship, for spouses left behind loneliness becomes an enemy: a friend is gone and there is no denying the grief.

This is perhaps doubly so because we know that physical death only entered the world because of sin, along with illness, decay, and all the other suffering and sorrows experienced in this life. Every funeral is a reminder of Adam's sin and our own and its consequences. 

Yet every funeral for a believer who has gone home to be with Jesus is a reminder of something else: We were made by Him, in His Image, to enjoy unending and unfractured relationship with Him and that is what lies on the other side of the thin veil that separates this world and the next. There is no greater joy that what we will experience when we look into the eyes of infinite love and grace when we see Jesus.

But not just for us. In Psalm 116:1 the Psalmist makes an amazing statement: "Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his faithful servants." Why? because they have run the race and kept the faith, to quote Paul. And, because they will be complete in their fellowship with God for all eternity. The Image has been restored and along with it everything God made us to be - in His presence.

Every longing of our hearts on that day will be fulfilled in a way that we cannot even fathom. We will realize that for all our love of life, that this world is but a shadow of the one to come and we will emerge like through a deep cloud into complete beauty and clarity. We will finally be home: really, truly, completely home in every possible way. And we will have no end of time to mar the perfection we will experience in Him, in one another and in our own souls!

We know that Jesus shares in our grief when a loved one dies. He did with Mary and Martha at the death of Lazarus and He shares all sorrows and comforts us in all pain. But we also know that even as He comforts us He is blessed every time one of His is finally and completely home. It is precious to Him because we are precious to Him and we were fully made for Him. In fact, He awaits each of our arrival in a heavenly kingdom  that will never pass away and where we will realize how dark was the glass we saw through on this side of eternity.

The baton has passed: My father's death

My father went to heaven today at age 86. In some ways I lost him a number of years ago when dementia set in but today it was final - for this world. He left ten children, many grand and great grandchildren and many spiritual children.

My life changed today. I am not sure all the ways but I know it did. I will know it next week as well as we lower a casket into a grave.

There is no longer a generation of men ahead of me to die. I am now on the front lines. Mortality took a step closer. I cannot pretend. The grave is ample proof. My father said as much to me years ago when his father died. It was a rare instance of transparency into his heart. He was a private man but less so as the years went by.

Legacy now passes to me. I am part of my father's legacy and it is now mine to pass one on to my children: Jon, Chip and grandson Gavrel. Like my father's it will be flawed by living in a fallen world but still I have choices and those choices and example and relationships and life become the legacy I will one day leave. There is much that I can treasure about the legacy I was handed. There is much I can do about the legacy I hand off. 

Life is precious but it is also limited which is why heaven becomes even more precious. For it is unlimited in its time (there is none), its person (Jesus), and it's wonder. As C.S. Lewis wrote, it is the home we were truly made for. It is the home father was made for and he has now looked into the loving eyes of the One he served and loved. Like Paul, he fought the good fight. Like Paul, not perfectly, but like Paul not timidly either.

There is no unfinished business between us. Fortunately we took care of that years ago. It won't be long until we are reunited as he today is with parents, family and other friends who went before. I am sure there is a party taking place somewhere even as we grieve but grieve well for a life well lived. 

Finishing well is the challenge all of us have. Dad finished well. I desire to finish well. It makes the leaving ever so much more easy for the one who leaves and the ones who are left. For believers there are no final good by's, just temporary ones. 

See also, Legacy. Thoughts on my dad

What does it mean to be ready for death?

No this is not a macabre subject, at least for those who are Christ followers. Nor is this a blog for senior citizens. The truth is that our time on earth is but a speck of the time we will have in eternity. 

The other truth is that there is a paper thin line between life and eternity and although we all expect and hope to live to a ripe old age, we know that is not always reality either. I know this from experience having been on the precipice of death at ages 51 and 52. The line came so close for me on several occasions that the paddles were out, the crash cart there and I hung by a thread between time and eternity - for days.

I have two dear friends right now who will slip through the veil in the next days or weeks. And I have a list of people now at 56 with whom I will be reunited on that day when I too slip through the veil.

Which leads me to a question. What does it mean for us to be ready for death? It is, after all a part of life and it is the close of one chapter and the opening of another chapter so amazing that there are not adequate words in the New Testament to describe it - only glimpses. But if Jesus is everything and if we will spend eternity with He who is everything, I guess that sums up what we need to know. 

The problem is that we don't know the day or the hour when we will close this chapter and open the next so living in light of eternity means that we are ready for those two chapters to collide and for us to go from one to the other. 

So what does it mean for us to be ready for death, for eternity, for that moment when life and eternity intersect just long enough for us to move from one to the other?

Readiness means that we don't fear death. We may not like the process but for believers death holds a promise of something far greater than we have ever experienced or could ever imagine. Fear of death is really the result of an inadequate understanding of God and His Word. Those of us who fear death need to study the promises of God on death and eternal life. 

Readiness means that we don't leave unfinished business. I am not talking about the unfinished building project or things that can be picked up by others. I do mean relationships that we wished we had fixed, priorities we should have pursued, family we should have spent time with, obedience we should have paid better attention to. We don't want loose ends that we wish we had tied up when we are moments from eternity.

Readiness means that we don't so overvalue life and undervalue eternity that we and our family cannot make the adjustment to our going. Death is hard for those we leave behind, not for those who enter Christ's presence. But just as we must not fear death, so they must not fear it either and in their sorrow for loss, rejoice in the gain of those who are now in the presence of Jesus. I grieve for families that live in depression and diminished life for years after a loved one has died. If they only had a glimpse of the other side of the veil they would be rejoicing even in their loss.

Readiness means that I want to leave an example of a life well lived and a death well died that comes out of a deep followership of Christ and faith in all of His promises. Eternity is about legacy that we leave behind for our families, friends, and colleagues. It is about an example that we can follow. Every day I think of friends who have gone before me and the example they left in how they lived and how they died. Those examples are like channel markers for me to do the same. I want it to be said that I ran the race well and that in the end with eternity in front of me, I finished the race well.

Death comes to all of us. We all face that journey. How we face it makes a great difference to us and to others.

The fall and its direct connection to us today

While we don’t think of the fall very often, it changed everything for our world and for our lives. There is a direct connection between every sin we struggle with and every heartache we experience with the fall, when Adam and Eve chose to disobey God.

With the fall, what God had declared to be “good” and “very good” became bad and very bad. It is hard to comprehend the terrible consequences of that act of disobedience for in an instant everything changed. Immediately Adam and Eve lost the innocence of righteousness and realized they were naked and ashamed. Then when God came to commune with them as He did in the garden they hid from Him.

For the first time, they understood and felt guilt. For the first time they were afraid of God. For the first time they experienced relational disconnect as Adam blamed Eve. For the first time they blamed others for their sin: Eve, Satan and Adam, Eve. It was an awful, terrible, cataclysmic day of firsts that has dogged every one of our footsteps down to the present day. No longer would God walk with them in the garden. No longer could they even remain in the garden. For the first time, hardships would enter their lives and they and their offspring would suffer all of the effects of sin: Relational brokenness with God, with one another, disease, death, sorrow, pain, murder, war, bondage, addictions, and all the brokenness that we have experienced firsthand.

Of all the consequences of the image being broken the one most cataclysmic in its implications was the separation of the created with the creator. From friends with God we became enemies of God. Our sin made us objects of His wrath for sin cannot co-exist with absolute righteous holiness. 

From people destined for eternity with Him we now became people destined for eternity without him as well as physical decay and death.  Righteous hearts turned dark. Communion with God became distant where it existed at all. A friendly world turned unfriendly and uncooperative. It was a tsunami shift in every way.

Every heartache we have suffered, every fear, every setback, every funeral we have attended, every sadness we feel, depression we suffer from, sin we struggle with, physical ailment we deal with, emotions we struggle with – it all goes back to the fall. It was in every way a very far fall, a fall so far that it is impossible to adequately describe its impact. It was an eternal fall as people destined for life with God became absolutely separated from God. It was a massive fall as hearts that once embraced God now rejected Him. It was a fearful fall as people who once treated one another with love now used people for their own purposes. A perfect image became a ruined facsimile of its original form.

Yet, God in His love and grace left a residue of His image even in the fall. This includes a knowledge in the hearts of men and women that there is more to life than mere physical existence and a desire to understand what that is. Solomon says in Ecclesiastes 3:11, “He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet on one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” Think about that: eternity set in our hearts so that we would look for eternal significance. Yet it is still frustrating because “no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.”

Paul makes a similar point in Romans 1:18-20, that God has indeed made himself known to mankind. “The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of people, who suppress the truth by their wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them. For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities – his eternal power and divine nature – have been clearly seen being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.” 

The very magnificence of creation in all of its forms from the galaxies in the skies to the beauty of the depths of the seas clearly demonstrates that there is an eternal hand behind all of creation.

Furthermore, God left in the human heart the capacity, through our choice, and God’s call to respond to Him and to enter into new life with Him. In fact, His intention to come and rescue a world gone terribly wrong was announced at the very time that he pronounced judgment on Satan and Adam and Eve at the fall.

“So the Lord God said to the serpent, ‘Because you have done this, Cursed are you above all livestock and all wild animals! You will crawl on your belly and you will eat dust all the days of your life. And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers; he will crush your head and you will strike his heel.”

It seems that serpents were forever destined to crawl on the ground as they became a symbol of Satan who had appeared to Eve in the form of a snake. But more important is what God says about the relationship between Satan and the woman and her offspring. There will be enmity between Satan and Eve which is understandable given his part in this terrible event. Eve would never forget the awful event that Satan had enticed her to participate in.

But then God says something more interesting. He will put enmity between Satan’s offspring and hers. But the apex of this verse is the last phrase, “he will crush your head and you will strike his heal.” 

Here God introduces a single male offspring who will eventually come and who will crush the head of Satan once and for all even as Satan strikes his heel. This is the first reference in Scripture to the One who would one day come and defeat Satan. Even on this terrible day that changed all of history, there would be another day that would also change history, the day that a Savior would come and defeat the evil one.

Think about this. From that day forward, Satan knew that he would be defeated by an unknown male offspring of Eve. He lived in eternal fear of who that would be and when that day would come. It is clear he recognized Jesus for who He was when He ministered on earth, which is why Satan tried to entice Him to follow Him in the desert temptations immediately after Jesus’ baptism by John. And, on Good Friday he was ecstatic that God’s Son was crucified! He had won! He had defeated the one who came to defeat him. Little did he count on Resurrection Sunday and on that day he knew he had met his waterloo. He had lost. God had won and all he could do from that day forward was to fight a losing rearguard battle.

All of history from the awful day of the fall has been a story of redemption as God, out of amazing love for rebellious people put in place His divine rescue operation that would climax with the ministry, death and resurrection of Jesus and culminate in a New Heavens and New Earth where God and His redeemed will live for all time. 

Living well and dying well

This morning I received news that a good friend of mine and a ministry leader in Chicago had passed into the arms of Jesus on Saturday night. His had been a hard battle with colon cancer over the past several years and he died in the loving arms of his wife, his hand being held by his daughter. 


Glen lived well! He had given his life to the urban poor and racial reconciliation for decades, being on the forefront of that hard work before the church in the United States was engaged. He and his family walked the walk as they lived in the neighborhood in which they worked. As a white leader, he teamed with an African American leader to forge a new way of thinking about what it meant for whites and blacks to work and worship together for Jesus in the days after the race riots in Chicago, a ministry that continues to this day. In every way, Glen lived well.


It was not an easy walk, including the death of his adopted son in recent years and numerous challenges that come when one is pressing into Satan's territory. Through it all, Glen displayed a kind demeanor, a deep sense of calling and a tenacity that touched all around him. Glen had a theology of life and ministry which He lived out so very well. Glen never became angry with God even when treatments made life incredibly difficult and his energies depleted. He continued to do what he could and spent time with family and friends even welcoming them when he was at home in hospice.


But Glen also had an understanding of death. He fought his diagnosis with all that he had for the sake of his family and ministry but determined that if this was his time that he would die well - and he did. He understood that life is not all there is, and that in fact, the best was yet to come and once he went on hospice he turned his eyes toward his next chapter and died in peace and dignity. 


I spoke to a group of Parish Nurses on Saturday who often minister to those who are dying and they reflected on the difference between the deaths of believers as against non-believers. How peaceful and even holy the moment is when believers take the step into eternal life compared to non-believers. 


Having been on the brink of death on several occasions I know a bit of the inner struggle - but I am determined to live well and to also die well. We live by faith and we die by faith. We neither overestimate the value of this life or underestimate the value of life with Jesus. For those of us in the second half it is something to think about. I look at many who have gone before me and am determined that I too want to die well when the time comes, full of gratitude for the life God has given, full of faith in a loving Father and full of anticipation of finally looking into the eyes of the one who made my life what it was - Jesus.


Let's leave a faithful legacy in life, and in how we face death, as all of us do and where the ultimate test of our faith is tested.

Steve Jobs and our personal legacies

The news of Steve Jobs death at a young age causes all of us to think about our own mortality and the legacy we will leave. His legacy is amazing! Few people have changed the way so many people do life. My music comes from I Tunes, my reading today is largely on the I Pad, and my I Phone goes wherever I go. Steve was a creative force second to none. And he handled his illness with great dignity.

One of my passions is that all of God's people would realize that they too can leave a great and lasting legacy, one more significant than Steve Jobs because unlike technology (which I love) that will not transcend this world, our legacy can last for all eternity. It is found in the lives we touch, those we introduce to Jesus, and the ripples of spiritual influence that will go on and on from us till the time when Jesus returns. Every time a life is changed by Jesus, an eternal legacy is born.

One of the reasons I am passionate about missions is that I know that through my investment in sharing the Gospel globally I will leave behind a lasting and eternal legacy that touches many nations. There will be little notice when I leave this life, unlike Steve Jobs but I will spend eternity with the joy that many are there because of my commitment to sharing God's Good News in this life. And every one of us can share in that legacy.

We underestimate the impact that our lives have when we simply ripple on those in our circle of influence for Jesus. We will be surprised when we meet Jesus and He says "Well done, good and faithful servant" and we realize that our seemingly normal and inconsequential lives (from a fame standpoint) had an amazing eternal impact. We will realize that acts of kindness and ministry and love that we live out as a normal part of our everyday lives had a cumulative effect for Jesus that we had never imagined.

Never underestimate the legacy you will leave. If our lives are lived faithfully with a focus on pleasing our Lord, it will be greater than you could ever imagine. And it will last for eternity. Because of Jesus, our legacies can transcend even that of amazing people like Steve Jobs.

Two lives lived well: One Famous, One Not

It was forty years ago this year that as a youngster of fifteen I sat captivated through a week long series of talks by John R.W. Stott at the St. Andrews Church on Nathan Road in Kowloon, Hong Kong. Never had I heard such a cogent series of messages on Christ by a man with rosy cheeks, unruly hair, easy smile and a warm heart. After the sessions he would mingle and talk to us about matters of faith.

That mission, opened my eyes to what clear, expositional preaching should look like and it influences my preaching to this day. Over the years I have stayed in tough with John from time to time and he always had time to reply. Early I adopted him as one of my heroes and role models for his faith, ministry, simple lifestyle, commitment to evangelism, fine writing, prophetic voice on many issues and his amazing approachability. To this day, "All Souls Church in London reflects the character that he instilled when he became rector at 29 years old.

There are few people I have admired more than John R.W. Stott. Heaven is rejoicing today and I am once again reminded of the kind of person I desire to be. Farewell John to a much deserved reward with a savior you loved and served with your whole being.

And then my friend Honson Lee who died suddenly of a heart attack in China this week. Honson is not well known. He was an engineer for a major firm in Holland for much of his career but took early retirement to come back to his home, Hong Kong, and work with ReachGlobal in reaching Asia for Christ. Placing his faith and followership above comfort and money, he and his lovely wife Manling threw themselves into full time ministry at a time when many others were opting for a life of leisure. 

Both of these men have my utmost honor and respect for their love of Jesus, concern for the gospel, humility, sacrificial lifestyle and service to the King. Not only do I honor them but I want to be like them. I mourn their loss but know that heaven celebrates their arrival.