Growing health and effectiveness

A blog centered around The Addington Method, leadership, culture, organizational clarity, faith issues, teams, Emotional Intelligence, personal growth, dysfunctional and healthy leaders, boards and governance, church boards, organizational and congregational cultures, staff alignment, intentional results and missions.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Ten lessons from the Life of Moses on the heart of leadership

Moses is one of the greatest Old Testament leaders but too little attention is paid to how he got to the point where God could use him to do great things. If one looks at his life from age 40 to 80 there are ten instructive lessons that ought to inform our own lives as we think about leadership.

1. God is always on time but is never in a hurry. Think about this. When Moses was 40 he thought that he was something and God could not use him. When he was eighty he thought he was not much and God was ready to use him. It took forty years to perfect what God needed to do in Moses heart before he took on his God assignment. God is always on time but He is never in a hurry. He wants us to be ready above all things.

2. In God's work the heart always comes before leadership. At forty, Moses' heart was not ready for his God assignment. At eighty it was. What do you suppose God did in Moses heart for the forty years he was a shepherd for his father in law? He had forty years to spend time with his father, to live in his presence and the proof of this is the humility that Moses exhibited at eighty that was absent at forty. It took that time for Moses to have the heart material that God could use.

3. Hardship is inherent in the process. Our growth as leadership material does not come easily. It comes hard. It came in Moses' life by needing to run from his adopted father, give up a life of privilege and take up the humble life of a shepherd - as an alien in a foreign land for forty years. It is the humbling process that strips us of the dross that will keep us from being successful for God. It is not easy but it is necessary.

4. God's callings are holy callings. When God appeared to Moses at the burning bush the first thing He said was that Moses should take off his shoes for he was standing on holy ground. Holy because God was present and Holy because the assignment God was giving was a Holy assignment. All God assignments are Holy assignments wherever He places us. That is why we should take our calling and our vocation seriously, whatever it is.

5. God does not call us to do things we can do without Him. We should never be so cavalier as to think that we can do what God calls us to do on our own. Why would He call us to do anything we can do by ourselves? His assignments require His presence and His power and His wisdom. Moses got this which is why he repeatedly said "I am not qualified for the job." Of course he was not qualified and neither are we. God calls us to do those things that require His divine power and wisdom.

6. God reveals Himself to us as we answer His call. The first thing Moses had to do was to accept the fact that God was calling him and to say "yes" to that call. It was as he took a step of obedience that God continued to reveal himself and give Moses the resources he needed to lead the people out of Egypt. It was a "one step of obedience at a time leadership" which is what ours is as well. God did not show Moses the whole plan but He did prove Himself faithful as Moses chose to say yes.

7. False starts are often not failures. Moses had a massive false start. Was it a failure? I choose to think not. I believe it was simply one of the learning Moments that would prepare Moses for his big assignment. We should not be afraid of false starts in our leadership roles. God may simply be teaching us what we need to learn for the ultimate leadership role He wants us to play. Moses probably thought his false start was a failure. God probably saw it much differently.

8. God infuses what is in our hands for His divine purposes. It is a comical conversation that Moses had with God - especially because it mirrors our own inner conversations with God all too often. Moses says to God, how will the people know that I am from you when I go before Pharaoh? God says, "What is in your hand?" Moses says a staff, the most ordinary of instruments. God says throw it down and it became a snake and Moses ran from it....and the story goes on. God takes the most ordinary stuff that is in our hand or skill set and uses it for His divine purposes. We worry about what we have to carry out God's assignments. He does not. He simply takes what is in our hand and uses it for His purposes.

9. He does not call us to do it alone! Moses did not have all the skills that were necessary to carry out God's call and he knew it. Thus God provided Aaron to join his team and his father in law along the way to give him leadership advice. When God calls us he usually calls us to do things with others who have the skills we do not possess.

10.  We never arrive so our hearts need constant attention. Moses learned this in the journey of leading the people out of bondage and ultimately to the promised land. His own heart was tested time and again by those he led and the circumstances he found himself in. But he continued to nurture his heart and cry out to God for his presence and His power. It is all too easy to become complacent and careless, thinking we have arrived. That does not happen until we see Jesus face to face.



Monday, December 15, 2014

Three keys to humility

Romans 12:3-8 gives us one of the best keys to understanding humility in our lives. This is especially critical for leaders whose leadership role can move them toward pride easily.

Humble Service in the Body of Christ

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your[a] faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead,[b] do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.

The first key is knowing who I am: "Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you." Sober judgment is an important phrase as we are often tempted to think more of ourselves than we should. When I was young I thought I was good at a lot of things. Today I know I am good at about three things and the rest of my portfolio are weaknesses.

The second key is knowing who I am not. This is actually as important as understanding who I am and what I am good at. Jesus chose to give each of us specific gifts and the fact that we have a few and not many should actually engender significant humility. I am always amazed at the things others can do that I cannot. It is a reminder that each of us play a limited role in the grand scheme of things. While I love the gifts God gave to me I also recognize how much I need others when I think of the gifting I do not have.

The third key is understanding who gave us our gifts and why. It is hard to be proud of myself when I realize that the abilities I have were given by God to be used for His purposes. If I take credit for gifts He gave I steal credit from Him. Rather than being proud, we can be deeply grateful that He gifted and wired us the way He did and that we can use all of that gifting for His purposes in the world.

We never need to trivialize the gifts God gave us which is false humility. I know that I am very good at three things. At the same time we cannot take credit for what He gave us. All of this ought to engender a deep sense of humility in our lives. 

Saturday, December 13, 2014

Critical spirits and the Christian community

If there is one thing that I wish we could erase from the Christian community it is the spirit of criticism. I am not talking about raising legitimate concerns about issues or circumstances but about individuals who consistently stir the pot and whose default is to criticism rather than to encourage. Criticism is not a spiritual gift! In fact it is just the opposite - it emanates from a spirit of mistrust, pride and superiority.

A spirit of criticism is life taking rather than life giving and as such is not from the Father (John 10:10). It emanates from the lower nature. There are congregations that specialize in criticism and it holds them back from being all that they can be. There are individuals whose specialty is criticism and I for one don't want to have such on my staff or for that matter in my circle of friends. I prefer to rub shoulders with life giving individuals rather than life taking. The world is cruel enough and adding critical spirits to it is anything but edifying.

The book of Ephesians talks a lot about the kinds of attitudes and words that should characterize believers and none of them include a spirit of criticism. In fact, we are told that nothing should come out of our mouths that does not uplift those who we speak to. Something to consider.

Before we criticize we ought to ask ourselves these questions:

  • Is this simply a preference for how I would do things?
  • Will my comments encourage or discourage?
  • What is it in me that creates a critical spirit?
  • How would I feel if I had made this decision and was criticized for it? 
  • How would Jesus approach this issue? Would he approach this issue?
  • Do I really want to weigh in on this issue? The more critical we are the less we are heard. Does this raise to the level where it is really necessary for me to be critical?
Leaders are especially magnets for criticism. They make decisions and many love to second guess what those decisions should be. Board members or staff who have a spirit of criticism are the cause of much discouragement for leaders. For those who have such a gift of criticism I wish they could walk for a week in the shoes of a leader. It is easy to criticize. It is much more difficult to come up with real solutions.

Think of the fruit of the spirit. None of the characteristics include a spirit of criticism. We ought to be quick to encourage and slow to discourage. Criticism is the ultimate trigger for discouragement. Even when Jesus confronted sin he did so with great grace (the pharisees excepted). A spirit of criticism is not a spirit that comes from our Savior.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Want to grow your staff or elder/leadership board?




Deep Influence, which will release on Jan 1, 2015 is an excellent resource for your staff and elder/leadership board. If you are a ministry leader these are twelve issues that you wish your staff and board understood. This book with its accompanying questions will help you grow yourself and those who work with you. The chapter titles are as follows :


Forged on the Inside
Choosing a Posture of Humility
Embracing Spiritual Transformation
Suffering and Leadership
Managing the Shadow Side
Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
Leading from Who God Made Me to Be
Choosing Intentionality
Thinking Like a Contrarian
Living with the Freedom of Clarity 
Powerful Transparency
Guarding our Hearts

To order at the lowest price and with $2.00 per book discounts for ten or more you can order from the author's bookstore.

Some of the book's Endorsements
“We get formed from the outside in, but we lead from the
inside out. T. J. Addington explains this process with clarity and
conviction. In an age of superficiality, he will guide you to the
deeper places of influence and change.”
John C. Ortberg
Author, speaker, and senior pastor of Menlo Park Presbyterian
Church in Menlo Park, CA

“I’ve been a fan of T. J. Addington for a long time. I’m a wiser
and better leader because of his writings. But Deep Influence is
his most important contribution yet. Every young leader will
gain decades of leadership wisdom forged in the painful trenches
of reality. Veteran leaders will be inspired to finish strong.”
Gene Appel
Senior pastor of Eastside Christian Church in Anaheim, CA

“Any leader willing to offer his story authentically and invite
others to do the same is an author worth paying attention to.
T. J. is a man who has cultivated his inner life around the person
of Christ and allowed God to shape and reshape his heart, mind,
relationships, and priorities. He has led from a spiritual depth
and now is sharing his biblical and transformational insights
in Deep Influence. I’m delighted to encourage Christian leaders
to consider each chapter herein with prayerful seriousness and
godly attentiveness.”
Stephen A. Macchia
Founder and president of Leadership Transformations, director
of the Pierce Center at Gordon-Conwell Seminary, and author
of Becoming A Healthy Church and Crafting A Rule of Life


“My friend T. J. Addington is a wise leadership guru, and
Deep Influence is his most profound book on the subject! A
seasoned, reflective practitioner, T. J. masterfully tackles the most
challenging terrain of leadership—the inner life of the leader—
along with the empowering practices each leader must cultivate.
Few books effectively deal with leadership from the inside out.
This is one of the best!”
Edmund Chan
Leadership mentor at Covenant EFC and founder of
Global Alliance of Intentional Disciplemaking Churches

“As a wife, mother, and educator, I’ve been challenged and
reminded through this book of what it truly means to live an
authentic life in Christ. It begins with humility and honesty—
seeking the heart of God and living out all that He calls us to be.
It is through this personal relationship with Christ that we are
then able to be molded and crafted to become effective in our
leadership roles and to influence others. If your desire is to live
out your calling with great effectiveness as you reflect Christ to a
seeking world, Deep Influence is just the navigation you need!”
Melissa Larson
Adjunct professor of Biblical and Theological Studies at
University of Northwestern

“If you are not yet convinced that the most difficult challenge
you will face as a leader is in ‘self-leadership,’ then read Deep
Influence. My dear friend T. J. Addington sharpened his ministry
leadership out of the depths of life experience even as God
granted and grew him into a major leadership role for the global
church. Deepened by a vital spiritual relationship with God,
he enriches fellow leaders with practical wisdom toward deep influence for God’s purposes.”
Ramesh Richard, ThD, PhD
President of RREACH, professor at Dallas Seminary, and
founder of Trainers of Pastors International Coalition (TOPIC)

“Deep Influence is an invitation to listen to a seasoned leader’s
voice dripping with the life-giving wisdom of Jesus. The
practices in this book will lead to an exegesis of the heart and
guide the reader into the lifelong journey of allowing God to
mold ‘who we are,’ which informs ‘what we do.’”
Tom Smith
Pastor, husband, co founder of Rhythm of Life, and author
of Raw Spirituality: The Rhythms of the Jesus Life

“Deep Influence cuts to the core of leadership and returns
character to the central place it occupies in God’s eyes. I have
shelves full of books on leadership, but this one leaves you
knowing you can be better and lead better. It is significant
without being tedious, direct but not discouraging. Buy it, read
it, mark it up, and read it again. Addington ought to be on top
of the pile.”
David W. Hegg, DMin
Pastor, adjunct professor, and author of The Obedience Option

“Deep Influence, every chapter, was a deep dive into my
motives, methods, mind, mission calling, leadership style, and
relationships that brought me to a place of unexpected and
unconventional light, revealing a clear, fresh, exciting perspective
to press forward. T. J. humbly said it well—‘Depth matters’—
as he carefully and biblically aimed at my life through the person
of Jesus Christ and hit my inner target: the sanctum of my heart.
This book is a transparent, transformational leadership mirror
that leads to intentional joy and freedom. Ephesians 2:10 came
alive in me, and it will in you.”
Doug Fagerstrom, DMin
Senior vice president of Converge and author of The Ministry
Staff Member and The Volunteer

“With skill and clarity, T. J. Addington argues that leadership
is not about technique—it is about character. What matters
most is not how we lead but from what source we choose to lead.
Whether you are a ministry leader or a leader in the marketplace,
this book describes the practices that will enable you to lead
from the inside out. If you want to grow as a leader, this book
is a great place to start.”
George Davis, PhD
Senior pastor of Hershey Free Church in Hershey, PA

“Deep Influence draws an effective map for exploring the inner
life so often neglected by today’s image-conscious leader. T. J.’s
emphasis on personal integrity, authenticity, and emotional
intelligence offers a healthy antidote to the toxic influence
of every leader’s shadow side. His practical, personal counsel
encourages, challenges, and inspires every leader to pursue the
slower, more intentional, inside-out path to deeper, lasting
impact in ministry.”
Russ Kinkade, PsyD
Psychologist and executive VP of Shepherds Ministries

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Give the gift of Hope this Christmas to those who need it

Nothing describes the incarnation better than hope. Yet there are many who need the gift of hope this Christmas. This book was written for those who are walking through hard times - to give them the ultimate hope. If you know someone who needs the gift of hope this Christmas, this is a gift that will deliver much needed hope. To order, just click on the book cover.





From the forward:
Life has come undone. One day life is normal, and the next day our
lives are thrown into confusion and chaos. Like a drowning person, we find ourselves fighting to get back to the surface so we can take a breath.Pain, fear, and uncertainty have taken over. It is hard to even grasp this new reality as our minds and hearts shout, “This cannot be!”

If any of this describes you, a friend, or family member, this book is written for you. This is an authentic experience with life and pain and faith. Ultimately, this book offers hope for what can be after life has come undone, but before we get to what can be we must deal with what is. We must struggle through the emotional turmoil when life’s rules change cruelly without our permission.

No matter how strong our faith, such events often create a crisis of
faith. To not ask hard questions about God’s love and faithfulness in the trauma of life undone is abnormal, maybe irrational. Never is our understanding of God’s love, grace, and mercy more challenged and the answers more important than when life is hard and hope is scarce. We hang on to faith by the tips of our fingers as our minds work to encompass issues we have never had to understand except in a theoretical way.

To all of this there are no easy answers and often just more questions. The life undone forces us to question and reexamine the very core of what faith and life are about. I have asked these hard questions, and I am sure you have as well.

I invite you on a journey toward a life of hope, wholeness, and freedom. You can get there, regardless of how your life has come undone. This is not a journey of easy answers but one of honest realities, unlikely gifts, divine scars, God’s goodness, and ultimately a freedom that you have never experienced before.

There is nothing theoretical about When Life Comes Undone. It
comes out of real life, real pain, real struggle, and real faith. It explores the question, How do we walk by faith when life is hard and hope is scarce? Where is God in our pain? Why does God allow life to come undone when I have served Him and followed Him? There are no easy answers, but there are divine perspectives that can help us on that hard journey we all walk at one time or another.

I have walked this hard path. Walk with me toward freedom.
When life comes undone, having a community of support becomes
crucial. You may choose to use this book in a small group with others who are on this journey. Finding your freedom may involve receiving from others as well as giving your compassion and prayer to others. Use the discussion questions at the end of each chapter in your small group. Each chapter also includes a prayer, as an example of praying boldly. I invite you to prayerfully read through this book, allowing God to minister to your heart and heal your pain.

Listening to voices that make us feel uncomfortable

One of the most valuable lessons I have learned as a leader is to listen to voices and opinions that make me feel uncomfortable. It is not that I need to agree with them but I do need to listen to them and evaluate the perspective I am hearing. 

Think of the complexity of the world in which we live. We have perspectives of men and women (often different), first and second generation immigrants (often different), the outlook of various racial groups (witness Ferguson) and significant differences in the outlooks of differing age groups. It is in this environment that we are called to do ministry and advance the kingdom of Jesus - together.

I think it was no accident that Jesus brought together the most amazing group of disciples that would never have bonded apart from Him. He was making the point that in Him we can become one. In Him there is no Jew or Gentile, male or female, free or enslaved. In Him we  are one. The challenge of course is in living that truth out in the real life ministries we are a part of. Not easy indeed but possible if our vision is on the family God is intent in creating as His family. 

That means, however that we need to listen to the voices that make up the family we are a part of. All of us seen from our own perspective while Jesus desires us to see from His perspective. And His perspective takes in all of His people and their views and unique outlooks on life. Can it be uncomfortable? Yes! Can it help us grow and expand our views on life and ministry? Absolutely! It is our unity in our diversity that makes us the strongest as God's family. In that sense I love to be made uncomfortable because it helps me understand Him in a fuller way and the family of God in its fullness. 

The theology of the priesthood of all believers is a powerful reason to listen to fellow believers and seek to understand their perspective. They like us have the Holy Spirit dwelling in their hearts and it is us together that make up the wonderful and diverse family that is His family.

Tuesday, December 9, 2014

The kind of leader I aspire to be

There are no perfect leaders. The question is what kind of leader we aspire to be and what we are willing to do about it. I aspire to be a particular kind of leader that is counter cultural because that is what Jesus was. He sets the agenda for leaders who represent Him. I aspire to be a leader who is:

  • Humble - knowing who I am, knowing who I am not and knowing Who gave me the gifts I have and why He gave them.
  • Missional - possessing clarity on what God has called me to do and clarity on what He has not called me to do.
  • Healthy - in my physical life, spiritual life, emotional life, relational life and skill set.
  • Empowering - committed to developing, empowering and releasing others into their God given destiny.
  • Christ centered - where it is all about Him and not about me.
  • Intentional - living out the clarity that God has given me and not being distracted by less important things.
  • Learning - we never arrive and I desire to keep becoming better at what God has called me to do. My goal is to create a culture of robust dialogue and learning so that we never become complacent and always keep growing.
  • Gracious - treating people the way Jesus treated them and caring for them the way He cared for them.
  • Candid - without spin or pretense, providing honest feedback and analysis.
Those I lead will be the first to tell you that I don't do any of this perfectly but I hope they would affirm that this is my heart, my intention and what I aspire to. What kind of leader do you aspire to be?

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.


Monday, December 8, 2014

When convictions become theology

I have convictions based on my reading of God's word but my convictions are not theology - only what is explicitly taught in the Scriptures can be theology. But too often, our convictions become theology for us and we then believe other should abide by our theology.

Convictions are those issues where the Holy Spirit speaks to us about our lives as to how we apply Scripture in our context. For instance, I have a conviction regarding certain lifestyle issues that Scripture does not directly speak to. It is my understanding of what God want's for my life based on the application of His truth to my life. But that does not mean that I can insist that others live by those same convictions for they are mine and not Scripture's. My convictions do not equate to theology. Thus we cannot impose them on others.

One of the great freedom's about following Jesus is that He gives us freedom in those areas where Scripture does not speak to follow our own consciences. The good news is a Gospel of freedom rather than a system of legalism. We can choose to freely follow certain practices and we can choose to allow other to do the same - as Jesus gives all of us freedom to make those choices. I do make certain lifestyle choices were God gives freedom but I will not impose those choices on others because they are my choices and are not theology. I will also resist any attempts by others to impose on me their choices or convictions that are not theology.

Freedom is a wonderful thing. Lets use it carefully and joyfully and not allow convictions to become theology.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.



Sunday, December 7, 2014

Leaders who lose credibility by listening to their constituency

This is going to sound counter intuitive since we are all told to listen to those we lead. However, there are scenarios where listening actually hurts the credibility of a leader. Let me explain.

Most leaders know they have to listen to those they lead. So most do. However there are leaders who listen (because they have to) but have no intention of actually addressing the concerns of those they are listening to, even when it is a deafening roar. They can therefore say they listened but nothing was ever done to address legitimate concerns expressed leaving those who shared with even greater frustration than before they shared. It is a disingenuous listening because the leader has no intention of actually doing anything about what he/she heard but they can say, "I have heard all of you." The truth is that it was a disingenuous hearing.

Take a leader who introduces significant change without running process or building a consensus among those who will be impacted by the change. They can expect some push-back as change is not easy for people to deal with. But suppose they receive very significant push-back from people who are not known to be difficult or contentious. A wise leader would pay attention to that. 

When reasonable people - and many of them - are saying "this is not wise" good leaders listen. Dysfunctional leaders on the other hand will often say "talk to me," listen to the concerns and then ignore the concerns (after all they are not concerns to them) while saying "I have heard you." Now the offense is not only bad leadership in not running process and unwise change tactics but they have now minimized people who actually have valid concerns. The offence is now significantly greater than it was originally because those who shared their concerns to no avail now know that their leader frankly does not care. He/she plays the game but has an agenda they are intent on regardless of what others think.

Let's take this one step further. Because the leader has encouraged people to share their concerns with him/her (while not intending to do anything with them), they now know who is not supportive of their decisions. Often, those who share their concerns are seen by insecure leaders like this as "malcontents," "difficult," or "problem people." Never mind these same people have been long time supporters and participants in the ministry. It is in these cases that one starts to hear a great deal about church unity and in extreme cases, church discipline (the Mars Hill story). Dysfunctional leaders are unable to deal with those who disagree with them and get in the way of "their way."

If one is going to listen to their constituency (which they always should), leaders must be willing to hear them and respond to legitimate issues where they can or should. To listen and ignore good advice - especially when it comes from reputable people and a large group of people is usually indicative of an insecure or even narcissistic leader who must have his/her own way. It is sad but happens all too often in the Christian community.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.



Saturday, December 6, 2014

What is our shadow side and how do we deal with it?

Shadow sides of our lives are terribly important to acknowledge, understand and manage. I would suggest that there are three kinds of shadow sides to be aware of.

First, there is the shadow side that is the flip side of our strengths. Every strength has a shadow side. The "harmony" strength is a wonderful example. Those with Harmony (Strengthfinders) like there to be understanding and peaceful relationships. A potential shadow side,  however would be that those with harmony might be tempted to avoid dealing with conflict. Just because I don't like to deal with conflict does not mean that that I should avoid it. Those with harmony often must "manage" their tendency to run from conflict management. Every strength has a shadow side and it is worth thinking through one's own strengths and the potential downside that needs to be managed.

Second, there is the shadow side of our families of origin or early experiences of life. Our early experiences and upbringing in life can be both positive and negative. If I received conditional love and acceptance as a child I may well do the same with others, or assume that God does the same with me (He does not). If I lived with a parent who said I would not amount to anything I might spend the rest of my life trying to prove them wrong even when they are long gone. Understanding and coming to grips with the shadow side of our families of origin allows us to respond to the dysfunctional pieces and manage them when they pop up their ugly heads on our thinking or relationships.

Third, there is the shadow side of our own sinful nature. Those besetting sins, or our personal vulnerabilities that we are aware of. Being aware of our sinful tendencies allows us to intentionally ask the Holy Spirit for help and victory over those areas. Sin cannot be managed but needs to be forgiven and we need to learn to live in grace. We can, however, develop strategies for dealing with our temptations and vulnerabilities starting with an awareness of when we are most vulnerable. Understanding our sinful tendencies, living in God's daily grace and forgiveness, asking the Holy Spirit to make us sensitive to our relationship with Jesus and being deeply aware of situations where we are most vulnerable can all help us grow in grace and lesson our sinful tendencies.

Shadow sides are a fact of our human existence. Growth in how we deal with them is one of the key issues in our own maturity.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Friday, December 5, 2014

You can now purchase T.J.'s books from him for the best price and significant discounts on bulk orders of ten or more

It is now possible to order books from T.J. Addington at the best price as well as a $2.00 discount per book for bulk discounts of ten or more. Simply click on the book covers on the left hand side of the blog to go to the author's store.







"Lent courage and borrowed faith"



It was exactly seven years ago that I ended up in the hospital for what would be a 42 day hospital stay that I never should have survived. Many who read this blog prayed for me during that time for which I am profoundly thankful. It was a horrific struggle for life where God's intervention was miraculous and gracious - I am a walking billboard of His grace.

My sons were deeply impacted during this event and another a year later - a repeat ICU stay in Thailand. As he has reflected on how he made it through these two events where his dad should have died, my son Chip has made a profound statement: "I made it through on lent courage and borrowed faith."

What he means by this is that it was the courage and faith of those around him that gave him the courage and faith to face these traumatic events. He is a person of deep faith himself, but in the middle of trying to deal with the very real possibility that his father would die, it was the support of those around him that gave him the strength to face it with courage and faith. "Lent courage and borrowed faith."

We should never underestimate the significance of coming alongside those who are going through personal struggles. It is often our faith and courage that lends them what they need to face situations that are life changing and difficult. When we are going through the dark night of the soul we often don't have the personal energy we need to be strong and courageous but we can lean on those around us who do. Their ministry to us is to give us the faith and courage we need in our time of difficulty when we need it most but are too weak to appropriate it ourselves.

Who is it that you can lend courage and faith to today?

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

12 signs of humility and arrogance in leaders

Indicators of Humility
  • I have a proper view of who I am, who I am not and know the source of my strengths
  • I am a secure individual and therefore unthreatened
  • I know that I need others and treat them with honor and respect
  • As a rule I am non-defensive
  • I listen carefully to others and display flexibility
  • I do not need to have my own way on most things
  • I am willing to share authority and decision making with others
  • I intentionally solicit feedback and am open to critique
  • I pay great attention to my shadow side and manage it
  • I give credit away in success and take responsibility in failure
  • I surround myself with people who will tell me the truth
  • I live under authority and accountability
  • I realize that my leadership is not about me but about the mission
Indicators of Arrogance
  • I am self involved and have an inflated view of my own importance
  • I live with insecurity which impacts my actions
  • I use others for my purposes and marginalize them if they disagree with me
  • I display defensiveness and do not want to hear contrary opinions
  • I do not listen carefully to others and am inflexible when others suggest modifications to my plans
  • I am unwilling to share decision making with others
  • I resist feedback or critique that is not in agreement with me
  • I pay little attention to my shadow side and rarely if ever acknowledge it
  • I take credit for success and blame others for failures
  • I surround myself with “yes” people
  • I resist accountability and chafe under authority
  • The ministry is more about me than the mission

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Leaders who bring transformation to their team or organization

The best leaders are transformative leaders. Transformative leaders are not only committed to transformation in their own lives but also in bringing transformation to the teams or organizations they lead. Just as individuals need transformation, so do teams and organizations on an ongoing basis. Healthy teams and organizations are led by leaders who are committed to ongoing organizational transformation.

In order to bring needed transformation, leaders must have the ability to realistically "look beneath the hood" of their ministry in order to see what is really there. Especially in the Christian world, we are very good at seeing the good and glossing over the problematic. The best leaders are deeply realistic and are able to evaluate both.


Having evaluated what is really there there are four things good leaders never do.


First they don't criticize the past. This is a temptation for new leaders who can find it easy to criticize those who went before them. It is a very bad idea. We honor the past even as we build for the future. It was those who built the ministry to where it is that makes it possible for us to now move it forward. Honor the past rather than criticizing it.


Second, they don't blow up the organization to rebuild it. That is rarely a good option as it disenfranchises all those who are presently in it. We may need to make changes but staged change is far better than abrupt change.


Third, they don't overwhelm people with a lot of changes. Most people are change adverse. Staging change is hard enough for constituents. Overwhelming people with huge change all at once is threatening. Fixing everything at once is just a bad idea and sends a negative message.


Finally, good leaders don't ignore the issues. To do nothing is not a sign of a transformational leader.


Rather than the above, a wise leader prioritizes the issues that they see need to be addressed and start a dialogue with stakeholders in order to build support for the needed change. This is all about running good process and helping people anticipate what is coming and why. Hopefully a guiding coalition has been built of those who are ready to support the necessary changes.


In making changes, good leaders always honor the people involved. We honor them by engaging them, helping them understand, listening carefully, being flexible where we can be and doing everything to make people comfortable in the midst of change.


Transformational leaders have a certain profile. They are obviously realistic. They are also non-defensive when there is push back or when others around them push into issues that might irritate a leader. Defensive leaders shut down dialogue while non-defensive leaders invite it. This is a critical skill whenever change is necessary as well as a sign of good emotional intelligence. The focus in any change is the good of the organization as a whole while honoring people in in the process. And it is a process, rather than an event. Change events frustrate people while running proper process engages people.


If the forging of a leader is that of paying attention to the inner life of that leader, so the forging of healthy teams and organizations is that of paying attention to the inner dynamics that make for healthy, transformational organizational cultures.


All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Sunday, November 30, 2014

I unapologetically believe in miracles



Today I prayed for a friend that has a stage four brain tumor and unapologetically prayed that God would fully heal him. Yes it is a foolish prayer - unless one believes that God does and can heal even the most difficult disease. He may or may not choose to heal my friend this side of glory but that is not going to stop me from asking God to heal him here and now - for the sake of His glory. And to pray with boldness and faith.

I know that the world view in the west makes us hesitant to believe that God can do miracles today. OK, we believe they happen in India and other places but not here. And the more dire the situation the harder it is to believe that He can heal, which is ironic since He is God and Lord of Lord's and the almighty who has everything under His Lordship. His miracles are all over the gospels and they spill over into the early church and James, His brother writes to us, "Is any one of your sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up (James 5:14-15)."  Nor does James distinguish between a fever and a brain tumor.

I have some credibility in this department which I suppose helps make me bold. When I was hovering between life and death seven years ago this December, God healed a broken mitral valve in my heart that was torn and leaking torrentially. To do surgery was certain death at the time and to do nothing was certain death but my family put out a blog appealing for prayer and fasting and over the next two weeks God healed and it is whole to this day. Every time I go to the cardiologist they ask, "when did you have surgery?" My answer is never. God healed me and they give me a doubtful look until they read my records and agree it was a miraculous intervention. The fact that I am alive today is miraculous and a sure sign of God's mercy and undeserved grace. 

Erik Metaxas recently wrote a book entitled 

Miracles: What They Are, Why They Happen, and How They Can Change Your Life. In his interviews and presentations he has been laughed at, had things thrown at him and basically treated with contempt for his belief that God can and does reach down into our world today and does the impossible, that which we call miracles. I suspect many evangelicals are equally skeptical but I am not. In fact, I expect God to do the unexpected and the miraculous as he has in many situations in my life. Let me be clear, He is sovereign and He chooses when He is going to intervene miraculously but that He does I have no question. Without it I would not be writing this blog.


Which leads me to where I started. I am not afraid to pray boldly for God to do what no one else can do. That is His specialty. I have seen it, I read it in His word, I have been the recipient and I choose to take Scripture at its face value. So Phil - this is what I pray for you as you walk through this valley of the shadow of death. Our hope is in God and in God alone. And we can trust God to be good and to be faithful, no matter what the outcome. 

What do we think Paul meant when he wrote these powerful words: "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever (Ephesians 4:20-21)." Read those words carefully several times and then ask yourself, "What is God capable of doing in our lives and in our day?"

If you want to join me in praying for Phil (boldly) you may access their blog, Good Things From the Hand of God.


All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Saturday, November 29, 2014

How we react to crises says much about our theology and maturity

This is true for all of us but it is especially true for leaders. Our reaction to crises - which are inevitable - says a great deal first about our theology and then about our maturity. 

Bad things happen. It is never a question of if but only of when. And when they do, our reaction to them say a great deal about us. Why suggest that it says much about our theology? Because if God is sovereign over all things and if our trust is to be in Him it changes how we view those "bad things" that come our way. As the verses I memorized as a child put it, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight" (Proverbs 3:5-6).

There was a time when leadership crises could fill me with anxiety. Today not nearly as much. I have learned that God can be trusted in them and that I don't need to "lean on my own understanding." This is theology put into practice as I have experienced His intervention over the years. Anxiety in the face of crises indicates that I have taken on His responsibility while calm indicates that I am trusting Him.

This goes to our own personal maturity as well and the ability to control our emotions as leaders (Emotional Intelligence). Stress, anxiety or the need to act impulsively in the face of crises generally hurts our ability to deal with it well and it certainly raises the level of anxiety and stress in those we lead. Would you rather have a leader who is calm and rational when bad things happen than one who is stressed and filled with fear? Remaining calm is both a personal discipline and an application of our theology. We choose a path of calmness so that we can think well and respond properly. We can do that because we trust in a sovereign God who always has things under control. 

There was a day when I feared the bad things that could happen. Today I expect them to happen from time to time and I respond with much less inner anxiety than I once did. That is growth in both theology and practice.

 All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Thursday, November 27, 2014

God is never surprised by our surprises


Perhaps the most challenging moments of our lives come when we are surprised by events that rock our world: A medical diagnosis, the betrayal of a friend, losing our job or a loved one - whatever the cause, the surprises are surprises of pain, uncertainty, and often deep shock. In those moments, we need to remind ourselves that God is never surprised by our surprises; He knew about them long before they became known to us. He is never surprised and knows how He will redeem our situation for His eternal purposes.

Bad news that comes as a surprise is hard to cope with precisely because we have not had the time to come to terms with it - to process the news and its implications. It is precisely at those moments that we need to remember that God has had all of eternity past to know, understand, and anticipate the moment when we face our most significant uncertainty. The certainty of His knowledge and goodness is a game changer in our uncertainty. 


His certainty is expressed well in Psalm 139:6, where the psalmist writes, "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." Our surprises are never His surprises. In fact, if the events of our lives were written in his book before one of them came to be, the implication is that God's eternal purposes in our situations are sure and that what appears to be random events of fate to us is never so to God. For if He knew the events that would overwhelm us, He also knew beforehand how He would show His goodness and sovereignty in the midst of them. We cannot be sure of much in our lives, but we can be sure of Him.


As I reflect on the surprises I have encountered in my 58 years, I can see in retrospect much of how God used them to guide my journey. Some were not pleasant, and some were not fair, but what surprised me did not surprise Him, and He redeemed those events for His purposes in my life in amazing ways. It is that fact that gives me perspective when the surprises come. 


Leaders need to understand this principle in their leadership role. Our lives are filled with surprises that we did not anticipate. Yet the confidence that God is not surprised ought to give us a settled heart as we deal with those surprises. God is not panicked, and neither should we be.



Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Thanksgiving as a lifestyle

Scripture is replete with admonitions to remember God's goodness to us and to live with hearts of thanksgiving. One of the most well known admonitions is found in Psalm 100:4 'Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name." 

Even when we are living with uncertainty and anxiety we are admonished to live with an attitude of thanksgiving: "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God" (Philippians 4:6). Our Lord wants us to choose thanksgiving as a lifestyle, not an occasional event.

Thanksgiving as a lifestyle allows us to:

-Live with optimism as we remember always the faithfulness of God and His amazing goodness to us

-Push back fear and anxiety as we are reminded of who God is and of His power to deal with our situation

-Live with joy every day as we are constantly reminded of all He has done and the promises He has given

-Be people of hope who infect others with hope 

-Live with extraordinary faith as we reflect on His work in our lives in the past 

A lifestyle of thanksgiving starts with a choice to continually and daily thank God for all He has done. That choice soon becomes a habit and that habit has a profound impact on our emotions, our joy, our outlook on life and how we view even the most difficult circumstances. And, it is infectious to those around us as we become purveyors of hope and faith. 

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.


Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Getting it all on the table

I recently sat through a meeting that was honest, hard, candid and helpful. It was honest and candid in that everyone had a chance to speak into the issues fully. It was hard because there were hard issues put on the table. It was helpful because what was inside and impacting the thinking of people toward one another was said, making it easier to deal with the real issues. 

Because there was goodwill toward one another there were no words spoken in anger but many with conviction. What really mattered was the mission of the organization and that was put at the center of the discussion. Everyone had a chance to speak and they did.

This kind of dialogue happens too seldom. We dance around issues, we pretend all is well and we don't say the truly honest things to one another. It is unfortunate because in the end the organization does not reach its full potential. Truth and honesty bring clarity and understanding while stuffing it causes ambiguity and misunderstanding. But it takes courage to put issues on the table and trust that it will be heard and not used against us. That is the mark of a healthy team. Easy? No! Freeing? Yes!

Life is too short to pretend or hide. And neither move the mission forward. People of goodwill, however can have this kind of candid dialogue because they care for one another and the mission and are willing to have the uncomfortable but necessary conversations to get there relationally and missionally. It may get tense at times but it does get the issues in the open so that they can be discussed and hopefully resolved.

Getting it on the table is not something to be feared but to be embraced. Without this there cannot be resolution. With it there can be.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Monday, November 24, 2014

Moving from baggage to luggage

Think of baggage as those things that hold us back. It may be that we are running in the wrong lane, personal debt, unresolved issues or anything that unnecessarily weighs us down. It is all those things that create unnecessary dissonance in our lives and weight us down. All of us have baggage that we carry around.

Luggage on the other hand is what we take with us to help us in our travels to make the journey easier and more enjoyable. It is the skills we have, the relationships that fill us and the role we play when it is fruitful and enjoyable.

Here is the question: do you have more baggage in your life or luggage? To be more specific, what are the pieces of baggage that currently hold you back and keep you from being all God made you to be? What can you do to shed the baggage and exchange it for helpful luggage?

We pick up baggage over the course of life and it takes an intentional effort to relive ourselves of the baggage and therefore the burdens that it entails. Make a list of your baggage and then ask yourself what you can do to shed it or resolve it. A journey requires some well chosen luggage but not a lot of baggage. 

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.