The frustration many experience in serving on a church board - and how to solve it

 

Straight up, let me say that I believe in a plurality of leadership for the church. It is how God designed it, and when it functions well, it is a beautiful thing. However, having been a pastor, church leader, board member, and consultant to church boards for over 30 years, I know they can be deeply frustrating. Most of that frustration is self-imposed in that we don't pay attention to some fundamental principles that, if followed, would move the experience of many from deeply frustrating to deeply satisfying. 

What are those fundamentals?

1. Guard the gate to who gets on the board! Get the wrong people, and you sabotage the board. The most powerful group in the church, bar none, are those who make leadership board selections. Healthy boards always insert themselves into that process to ensure the wrong people don't get on. Three to six years with the wrong individuals is deadly to boards. Be smart in how you choose leaders.

2. Understand your role. Boards are responsible for ensuring that the congregation is taught, protected, led, empowered and, released, cared for and that the spiritual temperature in the congregation is kept high. Many boards don't even have a job description, let alone focus on the right things. A focus on the wrong things hurts the board and the church. My book, High Impact Church Boards can be a help.

3. Spend quality time in prayer together. Most boards don't! They get so caught up in the minutia of details (that someone else could do) that they don't have time to pray, think, study the word together, and seek the counsel of the Lord of the church they serve as undershepherds. When business and administration crowd out prayer, it is a sign that the board is moving in a dangerous direction.

4. Use an agenda and allow the chair to prioritize what is important and what is not. Not all rocks are big rocks. Some are pebbles and sand that someone else should deal with. Leaders deal with big rocks and delegate everything that can and should be delegated. Many leaders serve their "time" and then retire from church boards precisely because they don't focus on what is important, and as leaders, they want to do that.

5. Always operate with a board covenant that spells out how members relate to one another, make decisions, and handle conflict and members' expectations - including how to handle recalcitrant board members. Boards operate without such a covenant at their own risk.

6. Lead boldly and help the congregation become the people God wants them to be. Timid leadership in the church in epidemic! And deeply sad. One of the reasons many congregations have so little spiritual influence beyond the edges of their parking lot goes right back to the timid leadership of their leaders. Remember, we lead on behalf of Jesus. 

7. When there are elephants in the room, name them and deal with them honestly and sensitively. Too many church boards ignore the true issues of the church because we don't want to offend anyone. The irony is that we all know they exist and need to be dealt with, so we might as well name them because once named, they are no longer elephants but simply issues to be dealt with.

8. Evaluate how you are doing as a board. Here are 15 simple questions that will tell you a great deal about the health of your board. Have your board spend ten minutes answering the questions, and you will have some fodder for discussion that can help you improve your board, its leadership, and your experience. 

9. When you need to change direction or deal with known issues, don't try to tweak your way out of a crisis. Tweaks don't work in a crisis. Change does, with candid communication with the congregation. 

10. Be candid with the congregation. Spin in the church is ubiquitous, creating disillusionment with leadership and the church itself. Don't contribute to that disillusionment.

Effective boards are a joy to serve on. Ineffective boards are a major frustration. Which one do you have?

Living out God's grace

 

It is not by accident that the hymn, Amazing Grace is a favorite for so many. It captures so well the essence of what attracted us to Jesus and redeemed us, and it will indeed be something that we will spend eternity trying to comprehend. "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God, not by works, so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8-9)."

I am convinced that we will never fully understand the full scope of God's grace on this side of eternity, but that it must be something we push into daily. The more we understand His grace in our lives, the more content we are in Jesus, the more grace we show others, and the more we look like Jesus. He is the essence of grace, which made Him the magnet for the people He encountered.

Understanding grace is a life changer for us and how we relate to others. Too often, we are recipients of God's grace but are not students of what it means to extend that same grace to others. Legalism, conditional acceptance, interpersonal conflict, and lack of love, even in the church, are evidence of the great need for God's people to grow in grace. Knowing the truth is not enough for Christ's followers. Living out the truth with the grace of Christ is what will attract others to us and then to Jesus. Jesus came full of "grace and truth." Do we?

For instance, when I truly understand and live out grace:

-I no longer try to earn God's favor but understand that there is nothing I can do to make Him love me more, and there is nothing I can do to make Him love me less. Therefore I can be joyful and content in my daily walk with Him.

-I do not need to play the role of the Holy Spirit in the lives of others but rather extend to them the grace God extends to me, pray for them, and be patient with their faults as God is with mine. I am slow to judge, quick to think the best, and remember how patient and gracious God is with me in my personal growth as I extend that same attitude toward others.

-I can forgive myself for my shortcomings, knowing God has already done that. My motivation to grow in my obedience is no longer about earning His favor but rather wanting to please Him out of gratitude for His amazing love.

-I forgive others quickly, knowing that Jesus extends that gift to me daily. I cannot withhold from others what Jesus has so graciously extended to me. I don't give people what they deserve but what they don't deserve, just as Jesus did not give us what we deserve.

-I no longer look at people the way the world does but know that every individual I encounter has eternal value in His eyes and, therefore, must in my eyes. I go out of my way to love those that others don't love and to give value to those that others forget. 

-I don't display conditional love, just as Jesus does not give me conditional love. Unconditional love is the love of grace, an act of our will based on God's unconditional love for me.

-I love to surprise people with grace when they least expect or even deserve it. Just like Jesus with tax collectors, prostitutes, adulterers, lepers, and all considered undeserving and worthy only of judgment. After all, God surprised us with grace when we did not deserve or expect it.

-I am not hard or harsh, even when I need to bring correction to a brother or sister. Rather, my motivation is always love that comes out of God's gracious love in my own life. I display toward others the same graciousness that God gives to me daily.

-I love to encourage those who have messed up that God is not finished with them yet and that He can redeem their sin and give them hope and a purpose. After all, that is what God did for us. He is the hope for the broken, the guilty, and the hopeless. There is no person and no situation that God cannot redeem so we become evangelists of His hope.

There are many other characteristics of living out a life of grace. One of the most valuable things we can do is to regularly think about our relationships, attitudes, words, and actions from a filter of God's grace to us. Reading the gospels regularly helps us to capture the secrets of Jesus' grace to inform us of what it means to live a grace-filled life.

Do you have guerrilla warfare in your organization?

Guerrilla warfare is unconventional and hard to anticipate and contain as it operates in the shadows but pops into the light from time to time. The same is true of passive-aggressive behavior within organizations. It is a way of quietly subverting something or someone in the shadows and behind the scenes while portraying an attitude of cooperation. This is why I have elsewhere called the behavior a form of dishonesty. It portrays one thing and actually does another.

Passive aggressive behavior can take many forms. It can include delaying tactics on things that others need to be done, not communicating key pieces of information that others need, being supportive in person and unsupportive behind the scenes with others, ignoring standard processes, not keeping promises, and other behaviors that are meant to prick or hurt an individual or a group that they don't like or have a bone to pick with. But, it is done in the shadows where it is hard for others to hold them accountable.

I once was the target of such an individual who delayed their response, didn't tell me they needed additional information to fulfill their obligation, and used less than gracious wording in their communications so that it sent a message but was not overtly over the line. The individual obviously meant to send me a message through their actions, and I got it loud and clear. It was subtle but effective. I had no desire to further work with that individual and instead dealt with their supervisor and not them (they don't work for me).

Why does this matter? It matters for two reasons. First, passive-aggressive individuals tell you through their behavior that they are not truly with you. In other words, you have someone who says they are on the team, but in reality, they are not. Their heart is not there, or they have a bone to pick with leadership, but either way, they are not truly on your team. You have an obvious lack of alignment.

Second, if you consider the behaviors above, they hurt the work of whatever team they are on by putting, as it were, sludge in the works. Their lack of active cooperation inevitably gets in the way of what the team or organization is trying to do. It hurts the team and the organization.

How do you deal with passive-aggressive individuals? In my experience, the first thing to do is to address the unacceptable behaviors when they occur. If there is a pattern of those behaviors, keep track of them, and with a passive-aggressive individual, there will be a pattern. At some point, the pattern of behavior can be addressed.

Because this is guerrilla warfare that operates from the shadows. in some cases, you simply allow the individual enough rope to hang themselves since ongoing behaviors like this will eventually irritate enough people that you can act on them. You cannot go to motives but hold people accountable for their behaviors.

If you suspect you have passive-aggressive behaviors in your organization, keep an eye on it, as it could hurt you, your team, or the organization itself. 

Stand out by being a Caleb or a Joshua

 Our world is filled with naysayers: those with little vision, small faith, high fear, and frankly, don't believe God can do great things. This is true in the church, missions, and various Christian organizations. The book written years ago, "Your God is Too Small," applies today.

Small vision, little faith, and high fear factors to try something significant for God are responsible for much of the lack of fruit in many ministries. Board members who say, "we've never done that before," pastors who are comfortable with the status quo, and missionaries who don't really believe that God can break in and do something because of the "hard soil" all contribute to ministry initiatives that lack vision and faith or entrepreneurial spirit. It is life in the comfort zone of diminished and empty faith rather than a life lived on faith that God can do what we cannot do!

The difference between those of small faith and those of big faith is this. The first group defines faith as that which we can accomplish by ourselves. The second group defines faith as that which only God can accomplish. The first is all about human effort and the second is all about divine power.

This was the divide between those sent by Moses into Canaan to explore it on behalf of the Israelites (Numbers 13-15). Ten who reported back reported what were probably true facts as they had seen them. They concluded that the Israelites would never be successful in taking the land. They saw through human eyes and, from that standpoint, were probably quite accurate.

Caleb and Joshua, however, saw through divine eyes, and they simply said, "We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it" (Numbers 13:30).

Their confidence was in the power of God rather than the strength of their army. "The land we passed through and explored is exceedingly good. If the Lord is pleased with us, he will lead us into that land, a land flowing with milk and honey and will give it to us. Only do not rebel against the Lord. And do not be afraid of the people of the land, because we will swallow them up. Their protection is gone, but the Lord is with us. Do not be afraid of them" (Numbers 14:7-9).

The negative ten focused on fear and human efforts. Caleb and Joshua focused on faith and God's provision. And it made all the difference in their perspective.

The church in the affluent west often bases its faith on what it can accomplish (or not) with its gifts, resources, and plans. The missing factor is faith in Christ's ability and power to do far more than we could ever humanly do. After all, "Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not (and cannot see)" Hebrews 12:1. If our plans and strategies and expectations of fruit only go to what we ourselves can do, we have shortchanged ourselves and underestimated God. God is not interested in what we can do by ourselves. He wants us to reach for things only He can make possible so He is the One who gets the glory - not us.

The church today is full of people like the ten who said, we cannot take the land. The church desperately needs the two - Caleb and Joshua who declare that we can - but only because God goes before us. The mission world has many like the ten who really don't believe that God will actually break through in amazing ways. It, too, needs Calebs and Joshuas, who live in the realm of deep abiding faith in the power and purpose of God, to do far beyond what we could ask or imagine - in his strength, not ours.

Are you a Caleb or Joshua or more like the other ten? God calls us to "abundant and copious fruit (John 15) for the Kingdom based on his presence and power and Kingdom authority (Matthew 28:18-20). That takes vision, faith, belief, and reliance on a power far greater than our own. Small faith leads to wandering in the wilderness like the Israelites. Courageous faith leads to the taking of the land. Which world do you live in today?

Church staff cultures: Who is responsible for ensuring that it is healthy?

 

In my many years of working with churches, I have encountered many situations where the culture of the staff is unhealthy. In many cases, these are good churches with vibrant ministries, and congregants would not necessarily know there are internal challenges. Although, inevitably, dishealth at the staff level does spill out into the congregation. It is usually only a matter of time.

Who is responsible for creating a healthy staff culture? That always falls to the senior leader who sets the tone. While they don't do this alone, they are the gatekeepers for ensuring it happens. While there are many facets to a healthy culture, I would argue that the following are critical: 

• The focus is always on Jesus and His mission for the church. It is always His agenda that matters, not ours.

• There is an intentional culture of candid conversation where any issue can be put on the table except for a personal attack or hidden agenda. In other words, there is the freedom to express one's views without fear of reprisal. This takes a leader who is non-defensive and open.

• There is clarity around the mission, the values, the direction, and each staff member's job. Without clarity, there cannot be alignment or desired results.

• There is an intentional disciple-making culture. That is the mandate for the church, but many churches don't have a plan. Without a disciple-making plan, it won't happen.

• All staff and members are treated with respect and kindness, and there is a marked absence of gossip or behaviors that don't fit a Jesus culture (think the fruit of the Spirit).

• A spirit of new ideas, innovation, and better ways of doing things is fostered.

• Staff are heavily empowered to carry out their work with great accountability. Empowerment and accountability go together. Senior leaders don't micromanage staff but empower them.

• Senior leader(s) serve their staff rather than believing that staff should serve them.

Where there are dysfunctional staff cultures, one or more of these elements is absent. In many staff cultures, there is not clarity, there is control rather than empowerment, staff are not treated with dignity and respect, alignment is not present, open dialogue is not allowed, and while there may be many good things happening ministry wise, they don't move people in a common direction of becoming disciples of Jesus. This is true of large and small congregations. 

Signs of an unhealthy staff culture include mistrust, keeping quiet, not being candid about what one sees, cliques, gossip, keeping your head down, and a low happiness factor. Add to that a significant amount of turnover as staff members get tired and worn down by the unhealthy culture. 

And so much of this comes back to a leader who is humble, put's the agenda of Christ above his/her own, is open, and has good Emotional Intelligence (EQ). I have never seen an unhealthy staff culture where there was not an unhealthy leader, nor a healthy culture without a healthy leader. I have never seen an exception to that rule. 

The core marks of a healthy leader are humility, a servant spirit, a desire to hear the opinions of others, the willingness to delegate authority and responsibility, the ability to clarify, treat everyone with respect, and a commitment to put the agenda of Christ first. 

Unfortunately, where the culture is unhealthy, it will inevitably impact the congregation as a whole because both health and dishealth spill over to the larger body.

So who is ultimately responsible for ensuring the health of staff? It is the board. The senior leader creates the culture, but a church board monitors that culture. Where there is a failure to create a healthy culture and a failure to monitor and deal with it, you have a major failure of leadership!

Where is your personal identity found?

 

Identity is a tricky thing. Who am I, really? What gives me ultimate worth? Where do I find acceptance and a sense of purpose?

Those are profound questions. 

If our identity is anywhere else than who we are in Christ, we forget that everything else in life is ultimately temporary. Only He is permanent. Furthermore, only He can ultimately satisfy the deepest cravings and needs of the human heart because, in the end, we were made for Him.

Consider:
If my identity is found in my job or my role, when that role disappears, so does my identity.

If my identity is found in success, not only will I be driven to succeed, but I will drive others as well - and the goal line keeps changing, so there is no crossing the goal. What is success? Today's definition is not tomorrow's definition. Once achieved, there is always another goal line. To be defined by "success" is to live a driven life!

If my identity is found in power, I will likely misuse that power and move deeper into hubris, hurting myself and everyone around me. Often, power is about achieving our goals at the expense of others. And when my power evaporates, so does my identity. 

If my identity is in things, they eventually all go away. We leave the world as naked as when we arrived. And like success, the goal lines on wealth keep changing. The more we have, the more we think we need. 

If my identity is in fame, when my 15 minutes are over, so is my self-worth. And then what?

Those individuals who are most grounded, most comfortable in their own skin, most healthy and most at peace have found their true identity in the one place where our truest identity is found. Jesus. They have focused their lives on Him first and understand that anything that can be taken away, lost, or is temporary is a poor source of personal identity. 

When we chase identity in the wrong places, we don't have time for the most important things in life: relationships, family, personal growth, service to others, rest, and spiritual development. Furthermore, joy cannot be found in things that we chase but rather in the identity that we have. 

What is the true ground of your identity? 

How your staff responds to change and why it matters

 

Many are familiar with the bell curve that describes how people respond to change: innovators; early adapters; middle adapters; late adopters, and laggards. In my experience in the change process, I have another set of suggested categories to watch for. Where individuals are on this continuum from change resistors to evangelists for change makes a great difference when you are considering them for leadership positions either on staff or a board.

Resisters. Like the laggards on the bell curve, these are people who will actively resist change because they are simply wired that way. This is the individual who told me, "T.J., you can bring whatever change you want to the organization but don't expect me to do anything different." No rationale is going to change the mind of a resister. This does not mean they are bad people. It does mean that they don't do change, and you cannot have them in a place of leadership - ever!

Protectors. The protector is also highly resistant to change but for another reason. They believe in the status quo, the way things have been done in the past, and they will actively try to protect "what is" rather than embrace "what could be." This was the individual who told me and many others that the changes I was bringing to the organization I was leading at the time that I was destroying the organization. 

Cynics. This group is simply cynical about change unless the proposed change is their idea. They tend to view change as "the flavor of the month" and are often vocal about their opinion. Cynics generally don't trust leaders, so proposals brought by leaders are quickly discounted.

Loyal followers. These individuals have a deep commitment to the organization and team. They accept change if there is a good rationale for it. These staffs say, "Just tell me which direction we are going, and I will go with you." 

Idealists. This is an interesting group with an upside and a downside regarding change. When creating change, one inevitably creates a gap between what is and what should be. Idealists are highly impatient to get to what should be and believe we should be there now. On the upside, they want the change. On the downside, they can become highly critical that we have not arrived. Thus on any given day, they can be either an ally or a critic.

Realists. This group is supportive of change, realizes that it will take time and process, and is generally comfortable with that process. They are helpful in realistically figuring out how to get there and can live with the tension of what is and what should be.

Change agents. These individuals not only support proposed changes but will be active agents in helping the organization get there. They are your front lines in speaking a new language, setting a new course, and helping redesign philosophy and strategy.

Evangelists. These are the champions of change who publicly and privately live the change out, help others understand and get there and advocate for the new direction.

In my experience, it is the realists, change agents, and evangelists who will help drive change, while the resisters, protectors, and cynics will actively undermine change. Loyal followers and idealists will go with you but will not drive change. 

Think about the implications of these eight ways that people respond to change regarding who you hire, who you put into leadership, and who you ask to serve on a board. One church leader, after hearing these descriptions, aptly commented, "no wonder so many boards are stuck." He is right. Resisters, protectors, and cynics must be managed but beware of allowing them into leadership positions and influence! 

Further, when you are considering someone for a leadership position, it will be the realists, change agents, and evangelists who will help you get to where you need to go. Don't put someone in leadership who will not actively help you move forward and who is not change-friendly.

For those who are in a hurry to make their mark!

 I meet many individuals in ministry who are in a hurry! A hurry to make their mark. A hurry to have influence. A hurry to prove something to someone that they are somebody and something. In their hurry, they often get out in front of God, circumvent what He wants to build in their lives, and end up being less of what they could be had they been patient and waited for God to do His work. I know because I have been there as well.

While we are often in a hurry, God is not. He is more concerned with what He wants to build in our lives than what we can build for Him. We are focused on what we can build for Him, while He is focused on what He wants to make in us. Those are two very different concerns. 

Consider the characters we read of in Scripture. Jacob, for instance, was impressed enough with his abilities and dreams that he angered his brothers, who sold him into slavery. Once in Egypt, he ignored the advances of his master's wife and ended up in jail - for a long time. He, who would become second only to the Pharaoh of Egypt, lived in obscurity for many years as God built him into who He wanted him to be. He was in a hurry when he was young, but God was not. And what God made in his heart during those years was amazing.

Moses was a guy in a hurry when he was young, and his encounter with an Egyptian slave master whom he killed caused him to run for his life at forty. For the next forty years, he tended his father-in-law's herds till, at 80, he was ready for his most significant assignment. By then, Moses was not in a hurry, but God knew he was ready and drafted him over his many objections.

This week, I heard of a pastor who, years ago, took members of the church he pastored to start another church. He was not patient enough to work hard to bring all his people along, so he split. Today, he says this. "I was in a hurry when I should have been patient. These past years have not gone well; it is all my fault. Things would have worked out in the original church had I waited, but I had something to prove, and it didn't work out well." He had tried to get ahead of God and, in a moment of humility, admitted that he should have waited and allowed God to work. His new church never worked out well, and they will probably not survive much longer. 

Don't try to outpace God. Even Paul, after his conversion, had some years of obscurity as he was coached and prepped by God for his major assignment of spreading the Gospel among the Gentiles. 

When we are in a hurry, we miss out on what God wants to do. Depth takes time. It cannot be hurried! Many leaders mistake short-term success for long-term effectiveness. This is often true of highly gifted ministry leaders who are so driven to prove they can succeed that they do not take the time to develop a deep core. They settle for surface wins.

We may be in a hurry, but God isn't, and His timetable is the one that will allow us to have the most significant impact. 

What is growing in your organization's culture?

 

Organizational culture and what it looks like is a critical component of any for-profit or not-for-profit enterprise. And you can be sure that your culture is growing either health or dishealth that will impact your organization. In fact, Culture is never neutral. It either contributes to a healthy organization or creates dysfunction and frustration. With culture, there is no neutral ground. 

Everyone who has worked anywhere has stories about culture. Many of them are unhealthy. The question is, why does dysfunctional culture so often get ignored? Why do leaders not deal with unhealthy aspects of their organization's culture?

Because culture sits in the background as an invisible, silent backdrop, we can simply get used to what it is without asking why or noticing its lack of health. We say about difficult people, "They are just like that," rather than asking why we tolerate their behavior. We get used to and content with what is rather than asking what could be. 

We may even have a level of cynicism about people or situations that frustrate us but assume nothing will ever change. We learn to accept substandard behaviors or lack of excellence and follow through. We are not surprised or bothered by unproductive meetings or unkept promises. We are used to what is. 

This is why there are often deep pockets of dysfunction in organizations, sometimes around one unhealthy individual that doesn't get addressed, yet it infects the whole. These pockets of dysfunction are like a petri dish of bacteria that is growing ugly stuff, but we are so used to it that we hardly notice. 

Sometimes, an organization's dysfunctional culture is so obvious that all see it. In other cases, that dysfunction is like a quiet illness permeating the company. Those pockets of dysfunctional culture create dysfunctional organizations which impact every individual, every team, and everything they do. 

Try a small experiment. Ask your coworkers or staff these three questions:

• If you could change three things about your workplace, what would they be?
• If you were in charge, what would you do differently?
• How would you rate the health of our culture on a scale of one to ten, with one being the lowest and ten being the highest? Why did you pick that number? What would make your score higher?

These questions and their answers are all about the culture and practices of your workplace. Some would object that the questions ignore many good things. That is probably true, but it is not the good things that create issues in an organization. Rather, it is the problematic things! If you focus on dealing with dysfunction and dishealth, along with a set of agreed-upon behaviors and attitudes, the culture of your organization will improve significantly over time. The result will be a more engaged workplace. 

Inviting your board or staff to become disrupters rather than engage in group think

 

Organizations love to live in the comfortable because the uncomfortable creates anxiety and questions that are not easily answered. This is the major reason that board members, for instance, love smooth and friendly meetings. It is why they keep hard questions to a minimum, don't tend to ask them, and live with the hope that all is okay rather than dealing with known issues. 

It is also why many leadership groups do the same thing. They do not invite disruptive questions or observations, especially if it would make the senior leader uncomfortable. This is the nature of organizations and the pressure to keep people comfortable rather than challenging what is. Those who ask disruptive questions are often marginalized or put in their place by other group members. 

How, for instance, did the Willow Creek Church or Harvest Bible Church dysfunction go on for so long, and how did the boards and staff disregard what was so apparent to those on the outside looking in? In both cases (and in multiple other cases), the desire to live in the comfort zone precluded candid discussion about what was actually going on, and in both cases, a lot was going on. In retrospect, it seems incredible that no group member called the question. Still, it is testimony to the intense pressures to ignore what is inconvenient or potentially disruptive and the power of groupthink.

There is a much healthier alternative, but it takes leaders who possess self-confidence, courage, and nothing to prove, nothing to lose attitude. It is an open invitation to engage in robust dialogue where any issue (read that again) can be put on the table except for a hidden agenda or a personal attack. 

Robust dialogue is an invitation to explore new ideas, ask disruptive questions, speak candidly without reprisal, and do so for the organization's good. It is a rare commodity in most churches and organizations. The result is that issues don't get addressed in a timely manner, those who speak candidly are diminished, and the return on mission is compromised. Unfortunately, it is a rare organization that values disruptive questions, ideas, or observations.

When I led a large international organization, I only put someone on the senior leadership team who I thought would be willing to challenge, disagree with, or take issue with me. I wanted an organization that didn't settle for comfort at the expense of being everything we could be. It made a big difference. 

Any leadership group: a board or executive team is wise to ask the question: Do we value disrupters, or do we love comfort? Have a candid conversation around that issue and see what you learn together. 

See also

What leaders and board members don't know and why

Curiosity and hard questions create discomfort but are the path to becoming better

In many organizations, those who ask the best questions become the object of criticism while the questions remain unanswered

What leaders and board members don't know and why

 

If you are in a leadership position, or a board member I have a question for you. How much do you really know about what is happening in your organization?

Studies show that leaders know far less than they think they do about what is really happening in their organization and that ignorance poses a danger to their leadership. It has been suggested that executives see 4% of the problems, Team Managers see 9% of the problems, Team Leaders see 74% of the problems and staff see 100%of the problems.

Anyone who consults, as I do, understands that this dynamic creates all kinds of issues that are dangerous to the organization. These include disgruntled staff, strategies that are no longer working, leaders who are creating more harm than good, and broken systems that eat up time and energy, and cost. 

Why does this "iceberg of ignorance" exist? Here are some reasons.

First, senior leaders (and board members) don't ask people in the organization the kinds of questions that would provide them with real knowledge. In fact, many in leadership don't ask questions at all. Rather, they assume that because they are in leadership that they understand and know the facts. That is a very dangerous and erroneous assumption. Leaders are often the last to know the actual state of affairs because unless asked, staff will not take the risk of being the bearer of bad news. 

Second, many leaders want to hear what makes them comfortable, not the real issues. Thus, they not only don't ask hard questions but they resist information that they find inconvenient. Staff quickly discern what it is that leaders want to hear and tailor their messages accordingly. It is simple self-preservation.

Peter Drucker is considered a management guru. He knew a ton about what was going on in industry and business. How did he know what he knew? Every morning for many years he would call "line operators" in various businesses and ask probing questions. He didn't call the presidents, vice presidents, or leadership team but those who actually did the work. And then he listened and asked follow up questions. 

One of the most strategic things any leader can do is to invest time, real time, in talking to staff at all levels. And in those conversations, ask good questions, listen carefully, and follow the trails that appear.

Here are some basic questions that will create meaningful dialogue and provide the leader with real information.

• On a scale of one to ten, what is your happiness factor in your work?
• What would make it higher?
• Do you have the necessary tools to do your work well?
• Are you being used to your fullest potential?
• What issues do you see from your vantage point that keep our organization from being as successful as it could be?
• Are there any people you work with who you think is in the wrong position?
• If you could change three things about our culture what would they be and why?
• If you were the president, what would you do differently in our organization?
• How can I and our management support you better?

The only way to truly understand what is going on outside of the rooms and meetings of power is to engage and listen to those who work at different levels of the organization. Never assume that you are getting the straight scoop from senior management. They often don't know because they don't ask the questions. But if you want to lead well, you will!

Ask the questions, listen carefully, and follow the trails and you will learn a great deal about the organization you lead. Ignore that discipline and you will be leading from ignorance. Many leaders do! Don't be one of them!

Curiosity and hard questions create discomfort but are the path to becoming better

 

In my recent blog on asking the right questions, I make this statement: Those who ask the best questions are often the target of criticism for asking irritating questions. In contrast, the answers to those questions often go unaddressed. Rather than focusing on the question, the organization often focuses on the one who asked it.

This raises a related question: Why are we not more curious about what is happening in our organizations? In fact, we often resist good questions and target those who ask them because it makes us uncomfortable.

In her excellent book Atlas of the Heart, Brene Brown suggests, "Choosing to be curious is choosing to be vulnerable because it requires us to surrender to uncertainty. We have to ask questions, admit to not knowing, risk being told that we shouldn't be asking, and, sometimes, make discoveries that lead to discomfort."

That is a profound statement. The truth is that those discoveries lead to discomfort that causes us to learn, grow, and get better. Comfort is not what drives us to get better. Discomfort is. 

It follows that the best leaders are not those who choose comfort but those who are willing to be uncomfortable and, in that discomfort, discover and dialogue about things they would not otherwise dialogue about.

Here is the truth about organizations. They always gravitate toward comfort. They just do! The best leaders create discomfort. They make waves without sinking the ship to discover new answers and confront the uncomfortable. 

This is also why organizations move from being missional to being institutional. In the former, there is discomfort, but in the latter, the rule becomes, "Don't rock the boat." Those who do rock the boat are often labeled as troublemakers when, in fact, they are one of your most valuable assets. They are usually long gone when you discover that truth because their curiosity and questions were unwelcome.

Church and non-profit boards are notorious for not asking the right questions and guarding the status quo rather than choosing the vulnerability of curiosity and the attending discomfort. A great exercise is a whiteboard session where everyone is invited to ask the most challenging questions about their organization. Not to criticize but to challenge the status quo, create discomfort, and see if we are satisfied with our answers. 

I recently worked with a non-profit where the interviews with constituents raised significant questions around common themes. The discomfort of the senior leader and board caused the results to be put on ice, and the conversation stopped. There was no curiosity or honest conversation. Just defensiveness and a desire to keep the status quo. And the organization will pay the price for that response. 

In choosing to be curious, Brene Brown says, we make discoveries that lead to discomfort. And it is there that we can get better. But you must be open to curiosity and hard questions to get there.

In many organizations, those who ask the best questions become the object of criticism while the questions remain unanswered

 

Here is something I have observed on numerous occasions with organizations I have worked with. 

Those who ask the best questions are often the target of criticism for asking what are considered irritating questions, while the answers often go unaddressed. Rather than focusing on the question, the organization often focuses on the one who asked it.

Why would this be? Organizations can be very protective of the status quo because the status quo is comfortable. It is what we are used to, and challenging the status quo with a hard question is often an unwelcome intrusion to the group's comfort. 

There is another phenomenon at work. Many of the paradigms of the organization were decided on by senior leaders, and they may feel that questioning the paradigm is a criticism of them. The resulting defensiveness can be a powerful message not to question their decisions.

In both instances, it is often the one who asks the questions who becomes the target of criticism while the issues they asked about are left undiscussed.

Here is the thing. Organizations that ask the best questions become the best organizations. No organization gets better without the probing questions of good people who want the best for the organization. Yet, in many instances, the pride of the group or the leader shut down the questions because they are considered irritating. This is especially true in religious institutions where we can claim "God's direction" in our actions. 

Great questions are a means of getting to the truth and better practices. I once consulted with a church board where 15 staff had left over a five-year period. I asked the obvious question as to whether exit interviews had been conducted. The answer was no. I asked why not, and the board members hung their heads. So I interviewed the fifteen and discovered similar stories of why these staff had left. In every case, it revolved around their senior leader. Why had no one asked this question? Because it would have been inconvenient and made some uncomfortable. Yet, in not asking the question, dysfunction was allowed to continue for years. 

Good questions should not be seen as threats but as a means of honing strategies, practices, and assumptions that may need reconsidering. This does not mean the current practices are ineffective, but there may be more effective ways. You get there with questions. In fact, good questions are disruptive to the organization in a great way.

So, going back to my prior observation. We ought to celebrate those who ask the best and most prescient questions rather than see those individuals as troublemakers and irritants. Your culture will either celebrate great questions or shut them down. The result will either be a better organization or one that resists true progress. 

My one caveat would be this. Any question should be invited, with the exception of a hidden agenda or a personal attack. With those two exceptions, any question should be welcomed.

Does your organization invite and encourage hard questions, or does it seek to shut those questions down? In fact, here is a question you might consider asking: What questions do we resist asking because we are not sure we want to know the answer? Start with those.

Proud organizations and leaders with egos resist good questions. Humble organizations and humble leaders welcome them because it is not about them but about the mission.

Lessons from the Southwest Airline Meltdown: A Cautionary Tale

 

The recent debacle of Southwest Airlines and the cancellation of the majority of their flights leaving passengers stranded for days or a week or more is a cautionary tale. This is, after all, a highly successful airline with better-than-average service at a relatively low cost. Yet, earlier this week, the airline could not find cabin crews and pilots and literally had to ground the fleet to figure out who was where and match people and planes for a restart. In the meantime, hundreds of thousands of passengers were left stranded, at the peak of the Christmas season. The cost to SWA will be high financially, to their reputation, and in the sphere of public opinion. So the question is, how could this happen and what can it teach us in the organizations we work for?

Several lessons seem to stand out from what we know at the moment. These lessons are important because they apply to all organizations whether for profit or not for profit. 

One: Success can blind us to the need to pay attention to the basics. A winning formula will only keep you winning for a season. In the case of SWA, it has been a long season but undeniably, if you listen to the employees, the management was inured to some mounting and glaring deficiencies by the very success that they had. Success is both a blessing and a curse because while it brings profits or an impressive return on mission, it also gives one a false sense of security that all is well. Clearly, in the case of SWA, all was not well.

Two: Major failures are most often the result of incremental issues ignored. There were warning signs at SWA for years that all was not well, particularly in the investments made to the IT systems that brought the whole enterprise to a halt this past week. This was not a major failure caused by the weather or some catastrophic happening. Rather, it was the cumulation of issues not addressed along the way. If you listen to the management they are saying that the issues were discussed but clearly they were not addressed with any kind of urgency. Discussion and action are not the same things. Major failures are often the accumulation of small issues ignored over time until that accumulation builds up and the system cannot handle it.

Three: Investments in excellence are an ongoing priority at all times. Too often, organizations rely on past success and strategy to meet changing needs in the present and future rather than reinventing themselves to meet new challenges. As the saying goes, "What got you to here got you to here. It will not get you to there!" Every day, there must be investments in excellence and strategy to meet new needs and demands in a changing environment and marketplace. The moment that those investments cease to be a priority is the moment that the clock starts ticking toward a more significant failure. 

Four: Listening to your staff is one of the best early warning systems that you ignore to your own peril. There have been some very interesting comments from the pilots union and the crew union at SWA. Both say they have been warning management for years of issues that went unresolved and they would say unlistened to. Here is a key principle: Your staff often knows what is going on better than those in leadership and management so listening to your staff is one of the smartest things leaders can do. In this case, it seems that this did not happen to the detriment of the airline. 

I often call myself the "consultant of last resort." By the time an organization engages me, the pain in their system is high and often, it is because of these four issues. It can be a church, a non-profit, or a business but these four principles apply to any organization. Leaders and boards ignore these four principles at their own risk but they are, in my experience, often ignored. SWA's situation is a cautionary tale for any who lead organizations. It can happen to any of us.

Advent Series #17. A Story Stranger than Fiction. A Christmas Reading for your Family

 

A Story Stranger than Fiction

A Christmas Reading for your Family

No story is better known. No story better captures the heart of a child - small or grown - than the one we celebrate today. No matter how many times we hear the story it never grows old, it never disappoints, and never ceases to evoke deep emotions of wonder, awe, and comfort. An angel’s proclamation to illiterate shepherds, a teenage unwed mother, a loyal carpenter fiancée, the evil king Herod, and a cold, clear, Bethlehem night without a place to stay. A messy birth in an animal’s stall, alongside a dirty alley in the dark of night. Confused cows watching unknowingly as the Son of the universe stares back unknowingly at the very animals He had created eons before. A mother, a child, a carpenter, a few agitated animals, and the pungent smell of manure.

This is a story so absurd that it could only have been scripted by a Divine hand. No other writer would have attempted such a script. If they had they would not have claimed it to be true: fiction maybe, but not reality. This is not how the One whose voice had echoed off of a billion galaxies would make His entrance. Without CNN and Fox News, into a hovel known affectionately today as Bethlehem but then nothing more than a tiny village on the path to Jerusalem. 

His entrance was marked not by a proclamation to kings but to astonished herdsmen sleeping with sheep. The heavens opened with ten thousand voices – not over Jerusalem the ancient capital – but over a tiny grazing field for a handful of insignificant shepherds. They would be the only witnesses of the grand entrance of a King. No other writer would have written such a script. 

No other author would have taken such a chance. For behind this story, there are echoes of another story - equally incredulous. Centuries before in the vastness of eternity past – when infinity kissed infinity, The Master of Infinity spoke into being the universe in which we live - 3,000 of whose stars are visible to the careful eye, 30 billion visible from a large telescope, - the other 90% of the universe still hidden from our eyes. Its splendor is an eternal testimony to the Author of the story.

Immortal, invisible, God only wise,
In light inaccessible hid from our eyes,
Most blessed, most glorious, the Ancient of Days,
Almighty, victorious, Thy great name we praise.

Great Father of glory, pure Father of light,
Thine angels adore thee, all veiling their sight;
All praise we would render: O help us to see
Tis only the splendor of light hideth Thee.
(Walter Chalmers Smith)

The Author’s heart had love that could not be contained. A heart full of love is not easily satisfied. Transcendent goodness longed to give away infinite love. Again the Author spoke: A planet was expertly crafted. One among billions. A people wonderfully created – in the image of the Author. Free to love, free to experience the infinite goodness of the Author. Free to revel in His infinite Love. But above all free. Love cannot be forced and remain love.

We are not the sole owners of broken hearts. No heart suffered such sorrow as Infinite Love rejected. Image bearers rejected the Image Maker. The story’s characters fired the Author to write their own script. Unmatched, searing pain pierced the Author’s heart as the loved one jilted the Lover.

Chaos infiltrated beauty. A planet was hijacked and spun out of control. Poverty of spirit supplanted endless joy. Unfulfilled hearts realized the pain of lost love. Without the Author, individual storylines faltered – and failed. Sadness reigned. Darkness descended in seeming endless gloom.

Truth can be stranger than fiction. For in the pained heavens the grieving Author plotted love’s revenge. An awesome revenge that only Divinity could contrive – that only Divinity would contrive. Having lost His loved, the Lover would send His most loved to reclaim His heart’s desire. The rejected Creator would kiss the unfaithful created. Tender mercy in place of deserved destruction. An astonished heaven broke into unbelieving applause. Image bearers would be reclaimed by the Image Maker. Light would once again prevail over darkness. Brokenness would be made whole. Peace would triumph over chaos.

All was silent in the heavens on the chosen night. Angels held their corporate breath. For nine months the Son had been absent, resident in a young girl's womb, coming to us, not as a king but incognito, just one of the thousands of children that would be born on a lonely planet that night – into the darkness that our word had become. Placenta covered the Son of the universe arriving to claim back His beloved: this time, one by one, heart by heart. Tender mercy arriving in disguise: one of us, one like us. On that night, the Author personally entered our story. 

Such humility our world has never known. A stunning reversal for a world gone astray. A Heart full of love is not easily satisfied. Transcendent goodness longing to give away infinite love, arriving under cover of night in order to “shine on those living in darkness…to guide our feet into the path of peace.” (Luke 1:27).

When an author writes, each character is unique; each has his or her own story-line. We, each have a story – unique, unrepeated, singular. Each story has its own joy, its own pain, its own pathos and unmatched quality. But each shares one singular, astonishing feature. We are made in the Author’s image, and He will not rest until we have invited Him to join in our story. 

More astonishing than the script He has authored, the story we celebrate today is that He also wants to enter into your story. This is the most ancient of stories but it is also the most contemporary of stories. The Christmas story is but one chapter in the Author’s divine script. The Author is still writing. And every person who invites Him into their story becomes a separate and unique chapter in His unfinished book. And into each story, He brings His light and peace. 

“For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.” (John 3:16-17.)

Have you invited Him into your story? 

Father, my heart is amazed anew at your love. This Christmas, I thank you again for the greatest gift ever given of your Son. Amen