Living in Grace

Real transformation does not allow for compartmentalization of our lives where we choose whether or not we will allow God to infuse that compartment or keep it for ourselves. Studies that show that the lifestyle and priorities of those who label themselves as evangelicals are almost no different than those who don’t claim to be Christ followers would indicate that there is a great deal of compartmentalization taking place.

This is a pseudo transformation where Justification (my sins have been forgiven) has not been followed by serious sanctification (my life has been and is being changed). While salvation may well have occurred, the process of my becoming all that God created me to be is circumvented when we compartmentalize those areas where we allow God access to our lives.

Real transformation starts with our hearts. This may seem obvious since it is clear that giving our heart to Christ is the key to an eternal relationship with Him. As Jesus Himself put it, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God’s one and only son” (John 3:16-18).

This new life in Christ comes to us not because of something we have done but on the basis of God’s grace, freely extended to us. “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God – not by works, so that no one can boast” (Ephesians 2:8-9).

It is God who transforms our heart in response to our faith. It is all about His grace in our lives. Not only do we enter His kingdom by grace but we live out our daily lives in His grace and it is the living in grace that is perhaps our most difficult challenge.

Grace is unmerited favor. None of us merit the favor of God “but God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). When we were still in rebellion He moved toward us, became one of us in the incarnation and died for our sin!

So if God has transformed our hearts through His grace, bringing us into His family, forgiving our sin, giving us an eternal destiny, why do we speak further of the need for transformation of our hearts? I believe the challenge is not in accepting that His grace has forgiven our sin and reconciled us to Him. The challenge is in understanding how His grace impacts my daily life with Him.

Many of us struggle with a deep feeling of unworthiness in our relationship with God and frankly many of us spend our lives trying to make ourselves worthy to Him even after we have accepted His gift of salvation. In our struggle with sin we find ourselves doubting our worthiness. That often leads us to work harder to please Him, thinking that the more we do for Him the more we are worthy of Him.

But here is the catch: There is nothing we can do to cause God to love us more and there is nothing we can do to cause God to love us less. We live and exist in His pure, unrelenting, and infinite grace. That means we can relax in our relationship with Him. We are worthy of Him because He has made us worthy. We are called his friends and his brothers because He has made us family. When we come to understand His grace we can stop striving for His love and acceptance because through His grace we live in his love and acceptance all the time.

The Christian world is full of Christ followers who are still trying to earn God’s love instead of simply living in His wonderful grace. If we know that we don’t need to earn His love (it is not possible), we are then able to serve Him with grateful, thankful, hearts, without fear, knowing that we exist in His grace every moment and that our failures are all covered by that grace. The more we understand grace, the more we relax in our relationship with Jesus and the more confidence we have in our personal walk with Him.

Transformation of the heart is therefore crucial. First for salvation and entrance into His family and second, for living every day with confidence, not in ourselves, but in His limitless grace that encompasses all that we are. We will never be the us He created us to be until we understand what it means to live daily in His grace. Transformation starts in our hearts and continues in our hearts as we seek to understand the full implications of the grace we have entered into.

Never forget

Every December 4 through January 14 since 2007 I daily read the blog www.reachtj.blogspot.com as a remembrance to the hope we have in Jesus and the grace that he extends so freely to us. The blog is the account of my 42 day hospital stay from which I never should have survived - but God gave my family hope and He extended to me  the grace of an extension of life for which I am eternally grateful. 

The battle between life and death started on December 4 when I entered the hospital unable to breath. They quickly determined that I was in congestive heart failure and had massive pneumonia and a huge pleural effusion (a collection of fluid in the wall of the lung-like having a liter of pop stuck inside your lung wall). What they would not know for a week was that it was MRSA  or Methicyllin resistant staphylococcus aureas- a "super bug" pneumonia. This would lead to septic shock, Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome, a failed mitral valve in my heart, high fevers that required ice cooling jackets, the shutting down of some of my organs, heartbeats of 220 or higher without the ability to shock my heart back into rhythm - all this while I was in a coma and on a ventilator. On a number of occasions the doctors gathered the family to prepare them for my imminent death.

Amazingly God gave my wife, Mary Ann, hope two days into this ordeal. Two days later was the day that I told her I believed I was going to die. It was the day that they would put me on a ventilator from which I should not have woken up alive. It was the day that I could barely breath as I felt I was drowning in my own fluids. But two days before that day as she sat by me bed she asked Jesus, "How should I pray?" And God replied in an audible voice (to her), "It will be very close, but T.J. will live." A voice of hope when there was no human hope. A voice of hope that she clung to during the next weeks of a life and death struggle. When the doctors gently told the family there was no hope she stood on the hope God had given her. She was a rock of faith as were my sons Jon and Chip who walked through the dark days with her and became men in the process. I owe a deep debt of gratitude to the love and perseverance of Mary Ann, Jon and Chip!

Our family experienced amazing grace during and after those days. Our prayer partners came to pray and love on the family. Friends gathered around and sheltered them in their love. And time and again, God gave His grace when it was needed. One night as my youngest sister was standing by my bed angry with God tired and discouraged, she felt a hand on her shoulder. Immediately she knew that it was going to be OK whether I lived or I died. She turned to see who was there but there was no one. She knew she had been touched by God or an angelic being. On another day, a nurse came in tears to Mary Ann and said through tears, "I was just in T.J.'s room and God gave me a vision of him alive and well!"

People often ask me what I remember from my coma. Only one thing. I knew that my lungs were ruined but that God had a set of perfectly healthy lungs for me. That was the Spirit's encouragement to me when I was deeply sick and unable to process what was going on. Another blessing!

Most of all we were blessed through the thousands who prayed for God to do something miraculous and extraordinary. It is the faith and prayers of thousands around the world whom God answered in His sovereignty in choosing to heal my broken heart, clear my lungs, defeat MRSA, septic shock, cool the fevers until the day I walked out of the hospital on January 14, a product of His grace.

God gives us hope in all situations and His grace is with us always. Think back to the situations you have been in where He has shown you His hope and His grace and never forget. Never forget! It is His grace that sustains us day to day, it is His hope that walks with us through the dark nights of the soul that we all experience. Someone asked me, "How do you remember?" One of the ways I remember is to read the blog put up for me daily from December 4 to January 14. It is a month of remembrance for me.  I will follow that practice until I see Jesus face to face and can thank Him in person. 

I am a walking billboard of God's hope and grace. So are you. Never forget. Always live in thanks for His hope and grace. 

http://www.reachtj.blogspot.com/

Markers of grace filled organizations

A culture of grace is something that we aspire to in the ministry world. The question is what does a grace filled organization look like? Some of the answers may surprise you.

Grace filled organizations treat their people well starting with clearly defined job descriptions, expectations and regular and clear feed back. You ask, what does that have to do with grace? Everything! Without these elements, staff do not know what their boundaries are or where they are empowered which creates frustration, can get them into inadvertent trouble and is really a culture of uncertainty. A culture of uncertainty cannot be a culture of grace.

When there are performance issues, grace filled organizations take the time to have candid discussion with staff to determine how to solve the issue. In many ministries, in the name of grace, such conversations don't happen because we don't want to create conflict. However, ignoring performance issues is not grace but a great disservice to a staff member. 

Once the issues have been identified, the question is "how can we help this individual succeed?" Maybe it is coaching. Maybe they are in the wrong lane and it is restructuring their role. It could even result in a job and organization change to get them into a place that is compatible with who they are. Facing up to issues with staff and handling them honestly is a marker of grace. Avoidance is not!

When something goes wrong, grace filled organizations don't ignore it but conduct an autopsy without blame. They want to identify, what went wrong, why it did so, and what could prevent it from going south in the future. The focus is to understand but not to cast blame. Sure someone is responsible but simply blaming people does not solve future issues. If there are candid discussions to be had one needs to have them but the goal is redemptive not punitive. I find many staff, especially who are new to our organization surprised by this philosophy. They are not used to it but deeply appreciate it.

Grace filled organizations go out of their way to be of help when staff members face critical issues in their lives. Staff are not means to an end but deeply important for who they are and people made in God's image and members of the team. This can mean any number of things, even breaking normal protocol. People matter and our commitment to fellow staff shows when they face a crisis. Is it an irritation to us or an opportunity to be Jesus to them? How we respond makes all the difference.

Finally, grace filled organizations treat everyone with respect. There are no little people in an organization characterized by grace. Our interactions are not determined by where someone is in the organizational chart. It is the whole team, no one member of the team that makes ministry possible. The measure of my respect of people is not how I treat those above me or beside me but how I treat and interact with those who are below me in the organizational  chart. 

Grace Magnets

Want to be a magnet of grace like Jesus? Consider these attitudes!

• Yes I will forgive you
• I am so sorry for what you are walking through. How can I help?
• I accept you for who you are including your brokenness.
• I want the best for you.
• I will tell you the truth but always with grace - like Jesus.
• There is no sin that is not redeemable. Will you let me walk you toward Jesus and wholeness?
• You can tell me anything about yourself and I will still love you and accept you.
• You are important. There are no little people with God. Others may not feel you are important but I do.
• I will not judge you for choices you make even though they are not the choices I might make. 
• I will not play the Holy Spirit in your life but will point you to Jesus and Scripture.
• If I need to confront you I will do it with humility and grace knowing how broken I am.
• I will be transparent with you about my own life and struggles.
• I will choose to love you even if you betray me.
• I want you to see Jesus in me.
• I will be there for you in times of difficulty and trouble.
• If you are one of the "least of these," I will treat you like one of the "greatest of these."

"The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth (John 1:14)."

Grace busters

While there is a great deal of talk about grace in the church there is often a remarkable lack of it among Christians. Amazing grace does describe the posture of Jesus toward us. It often does not describe the posture of believers toward one another. 

Think about these grace busters:

• Gossip
• unforgiveness
• Conditional acceptance
• Exclusion of certain people
• Lack of empathy
• Critical spirits
• Legalism
• Harsh words
• Judging motives
• Impatience with spiritual progress in others
• Spiritual masks that hide inner brokenness
• Judgmentalism
• Lack of acceptance

Grace is one of the most powerful magnets of people to Jesus and thus to Him through us. When it is present it is truly amazing grace. When it is absent it is a spiritual repellent. Let's be people who reflect he amazing grace of Jesus - who saved a wretch like us.

A theology of life

Think of the amazing gift we have been given in being made in God's image, in being “image bearers” of the Lord of the universe:

·       We were created for eternity with an eternal soul

·       We were made for a relationship with our creator

·       We were given the gift of relationships with one another

·       We were granted the gift of moral freedom

·       We were given the amazing capacity to create

·       We were given the ability to love deeply

The apostle Paul puts all this in perspective in Ephesians 2:10. “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” The word “workmanship” means a unique work of art, a one of a kind. As unique works of God we were created for a personal relationship with him in Christ Jesus, in order to join him in His work in this world (good works) which God prepared for each of us “in advance.”

In endowing us with His image, He gave something of Himself to mankind. Our very ability to know and love him and one another is part of that gift. I can adore and love my spouse and my children and have meaningful relationships with others because He chose to make me in His image. I can know Him, serve Him, join Him in His work in this world because he made me in His image. I can use all my creativity in loving and caring and serving and living because He made me in His image.

I remember meeting my son Jon for the first time knowing that this was my flesh, my offspring. The day I met my first grandson, Gavrel, was even more profound, Again, here was a precious child with my DNA, flesh of my flesh of my flesh entering the world. In making us in His Image, God deliberately planted something of Himelf in His created. Just as I look at my grandson with a love too deep to describe, so He looks at us with a love that is able to see beyond all of our brokenness for He sees His image in us, however flawed by the entrance of sin into our world – deliberately planted in us by Him.

Our news is full of stories of the brokenness of our world. It is easy to become numb to the human needs and issues we become aware of. But stop for a moment and put on the lens of God. Your neighbor who is hurting is made in God’s image. The thousands of children who needlessly suffer from malaria every year for lack of mosquito netting are made in His image.

The disabled who are so easily treated as throw away people in much of the world are made in His image. Those who suffer from chronic dysentery for lack of clean water are made in His image. Those young slaves of the sex trade internationally are image bearers of God. The millions who are aborted annually are stamped with His imprint. The elderly who are shuffled off to a lonely existence are made in His image.

Seen in that light, we cannot ignore the spiritual and human needs around us or of our world and be like Jesus. Life is precious. People are precious. Even the most broken individual is a potential son or daughter of the king because all were stamped with His image. 

No other part of God’s creation was endowed with an eternal soul or an eternal destiny. To care for people and their situations is to see people as Jesus sees them and to love them as He loves them. To live selfishly, immune from the suffering of others is to reject the nobility God placed within man, even though sin has made much so ignoble.

Every time we uphold the dignity of human life, uphold biblical sexuality, treat our spouses well, care for those that society throws away: widows, orphans, AIDS victims, those with unwanted pregnancies, the disabled, the sick, those in dire poverty, the elderly, we join Jesus in bringing value to life made in His image. We join Jesus in His prayer, “Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” How is it done in heaven? Perfectly! 

When we join Him in meeting the physical and spiritual needs of our world we start bringing little bits of heaven and His values to a world that is lost and dehumanizing to those He created. We join Him in His quest to reimage an image made wrong by sin and bring out the beauty of what God originally intended.

We cannot meet all the needs of our broken world but we can make a difference for someone who is an image bearer of God. Every act of compassion that meets physical and spiritual needs is an act of obedience to our Father who cares so deeply for every human being. He hurts when they hurt, and wants every image bearer to find Him and be ReImaged into His likeness. 

Every time we go out of our way to bring life to a situation, we make the heart of God glad. Each word that encourages, touch that shows love, help that brings hope or Good News that speaks to the soul mirrors the heart of God toward those He created. None are beyond His grace, none are too broken for his healing or beyond His divine touch. 

Do you see people through human eyes or Jesus' eyes? 

Do we really comprehend and live out God's grace in our lives?

It is not by accident that the hymn, Amazing Grace is a favorite for so many. It captures so well the essence of what attracted us to Jesus,  redeemed us and it will indeed be something that we will spend eternity trying to comprehend. "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God, not by works, so that no one can boast (Ephesians 2:8-9)."


I am convinced that we will never fully understand the full scope of God's grace this side of eternity but that it must be something that we push into daily. The more we understand His grace in our lives, the more content we are in Jesus, the more grace we show others and the more we look like Jesus. He is the essence of grace and it was what made Him the magnet for people that He was.


Understanding grace is a life changer for us and for how we relate to others. Too often we are recipients of God's grace but are not students of what it means to extend that same grace to others. The legalism, conditional acceptance, interpersonal conflict and lack of love even in the church is evidence of the great need for God's people to grow in grace. Knowing truth is not enough for Christ followers. Living out truth with the grace of Christ is what will attract others to us and then to Jesus. Jesus came full of "grace and truth." Do we?


For instance, when I truly understand and live out grace:


-I no longer try to earn God's favor but understand that there is nothing I can do to make Him love me more and there is nothing I can do to make Him love me less. Therefore I can be joyful and content in my daily walk with Him.


-I do not feel the need to play the role of the Holy Spirit in the lives of others but rather extend to them the grace God extends to me, pray for them and be patient with their faults as God is with mine. I am slow to judge, quick to think the best and remember how patient and gracious God is with me in my personal growth as I extend that same attitude toward others.


-I am able to forgive myself for my own shortcomings, knowing that God has already done that. My motivation to grown in my obedience is no longer about earning His favor but rather wanting to please Him out of gratitude for His amazing love.


-I forgive others quickly knowing that Jesus extends that gift to me daily. I cannot withhold from others what Jesus has so graciously extended to me. I don't give people what they deserve but what they don't deserve, just as Jesus did not give us what we deserve.


-I no longer look at people the way the world does but know that every individual I encounter has eternal value in His eyes and therefore must in my eyes as well. I go out of my way to love those that others don't love and to give value to those that others forget. 


-I don't display conditional love just as Jesus does not give  me conditional love. Unconditional love is the love of grace and it is an act of our will based on God's unconditional love for me.


-I love to surprise people with grace when they least expect or even deserve it. Just like Jesus with tax collectors, prostitutes, adulterers, lepers, and all those that were considered undeserving and worthy only of judgement. After all, God surprised us with grace when we did not deserve or expect it.


-I am not hard or harsh even when I need to bring correction to a brother or sister. Rather, my motivation is always love that comes out of God's gracious love in my own life. I display toward other the same graciousness that God gives to me daily.


-I love to encourage those who have messed up big time that God is not finished with them yet and that He can redeem their sin and give them hope and a purpose. After all, that is what God did for us. He is the hope for the broken, the guilty, and the hopeless. There is no person and no situation that God cannot redeem so we become evangelists of His hope.


There are many other characteristics of living out a life of grace. One of the most valuable things we can do is to regularly think about all of our relationships, attitudes, words and actions from a filter of God's grace to us. Reading the gospels regularly helps us to capture the secrets of Jesus' grace to inform us of what it means to live a grace filled life.

When truth becomes toxic

We value truth in evangelicalism because our faith and practices are grounded in God's truth. Francis Schaeffer called God's truth "true truth" and without a doubt there is much that passes for "truth" today that is anything but.


Truth, however, is a bit like dynamite. Handled carefully it is healing and helpful, as Paul said "useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work (2 Timothy 3:16-17)." But, if mishandled, it becomes legalistic, a hammer that wounds, and hurts rather than heals. Especially when truth is applied without grace.


Jesus was all about truth. Jesus was also all about grace. The Apostle John says He was the perfect blend of grace and truth. Can you imagine what we deserve if God did not extend grace to us? Yet how often do we use truth without grace when dealing with others?


The account of the woman caught in adultery and brought to Jesus is a great lesson. The fact that she was guilty is clear by Jesus' words, "go and sin no more." Truth without grace would have said, "stone her." Grace said, "He who is without sin throw the first stone" and "go and sin no more." Of course, the guys who brought her to Jesus were not about grace, or actually truth for that matter as they conveniently forgot to bring the fellow she was caught with.


There are in the church men and women, like these fellows, who are self appointed theology and behavior police. Legalistic, moralistic and self assured of their right to point out the wrongs of others, using "truth" or scripture to push their agendas or make themselves feel good - at the expense of grace. Truth without grace is indeed a scary thing. The combination as seen in Jesus' interactions is a life changing paradigm. It is like the parable of the master who forgives his servant's debt only to have that servant go and demand payment from the one who owed him. Grace had been received but was not extended.


This is how the pharisees of the New Testament used truth. It was hard, harsh, devoid of grace and Jesus called them hypocrites because those who are most judgemental are most hypocritical as none of us can live up to standards of perfection. We are all in need of grace. 


Much conflict in the church and relationships comes down to a willingness to use truth at the expense of grace. It lacks the very patience, understanding, mercy and gentleness that God uses when He deals with us. The words may be truth but the attitude behind them has nothing to do with the attitude of Jesus. We are lucky that He does not do to us what we often do to others. I know churches with grace in their name whom are devoid of grace inside their own walls. This is when truth becomes toxic, damaging and harsh rather than healthy, healing and gentle. 


We are all guilty at times of allowing truth to become unhealthy because our attitudes toward others do not reflect the wonderful, gentle, caring, patient, merciful and abundant grace of Jesus. Handle grace and truth carefully and it is a beautiful thing. Mishandle it, and like dynamite it causes a lot of damage. As Jeremiah so aptly said in Lamantations, "Because of His great love for us we are not consumed (even though they deserved it)." Why then do we consume one another? Why do we so often choose not to extend to one another the very grace that God extended to us in Jesus? The short answer is sin. But when we extend that grace it is a beautiful thing indeed. Who in your life needs your grace?

Living in peace with one another

Peace is truly a lovely word. It indicates harmony and a lack of hostility, conflict or underlying tension. How much we wish for and pray for peace in our world - which we cannot control. But where we can largely control peace is in our own relationships. Paul tells us as believers, "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone (Romans 12:18)." We all acknowledge that this is not always easy but it can become an intentional way of life if we choose to make it so.


Think of relationships within families, in congregations, and in the workplace. While we cannot control the attitudes and actions of others we can control our own. There are people who create conflict in their relationships and there are others who bring peace to relationships and don't get entangled with the conflicts of others. This is not a peace at any cost that chooses not to deal with real issues - but it is an intentional way of life that seeks peace and understanding wherever that is possible. 


By conflict, I am not thinking about differences of opinion or robust dialogue over issues that can be done without personal attack or hidden agendas. In healthy marriages, workplaces or among friends, there can be major differences that are expressed by self defined people without relational disconnect. What I am talking about is conflict that creates relational dissonance because we are dealing with individuals who cannot separate relationships from differences, who are black and white about the world and therefore create "us and them" situations which by definition destroys peace and creates division.


What practices contribute to living at peace with one another?


Don't get pulled into the dysfunctional relationships of others who thrive on conflict. Some people have to have an enemy in their life to fight. They actually create dragons they can go slay and create alliances with others against those dragons. The best thing we can do is stay out, keep our own council and not get involved. This is often true in family dynamics where the "family system" thrives on conflict between family members. Stay out of it and when necessary limit your exposure to those family members. The same family dynamics are often found in churches and again, it is wise to keep a distance from those who thrive on division.


Beware of critical people. Critical people create conflict. In fact their constant criticism of other people is a sign that they enjoy conflictual relationships (otherwise why be critical?). Gracious people overlook what can be overlooked for the sake of peace. Critical people are people in search of conflict.


Know what hills are worth dying on. Some but not many! If an issue is going to lead to personal conflict think carefully about whether it is worth raising.


Keep your distance from people who cannot separate differences of opinion from relationships. Healthy people are self defined. They are able to hold their own opinions and respect those who hold different opinions. Unhealthy people need others to agree with them and if they don't often assume that they "are not for them." This is pathology and you are unlikely to change it. Keep your distance!


When we choose to disagree, do it in an agreeable way. Conflict can be avoided by simply choosing to be agreeable even when disagreeing. Keep issues from becoming personal by speaking to the issue and avoiding personal attacks. Healthy individuals de-escalate conflict (a soft word turns away wrath) rather than escalating conflict. Healthy individuals seek reconciliation rather than division. 


Don't hold on to issues. Forgive, keep short accounts and never judge motives. When we let go we have a much greater chance at living at peace. Sometimes, choosing to live at peace is to realize that knotty issues will not be sorted out this side of heaven and we simply choose to forgive and move on so we are not held in bondage to the unresolved issue. We give up our right to "be right" for the sake of a peaceful relationship.


There are times when we cannot easily live at peace with others which is why Paul says "as far as it depends on you." We cannot control the attitudes and actions of others but we can control our own. It takes wisdom, intentionality, and a heart of peace to be a person of peace. 

Jesus centered churches

I dream of a church where...


Jesus and the gospel He proclaimed is the center of everything. Jesus changes lives, and the gospel He proclaimed changes lives and communities as God's people live out their faith in all arenas of life. The Bible is not a self help book as practical as it is. It is the story of redemption - how the God of the universe came to change broken lives through forgiveness, new life, transformation and purpose in joining Him in His work. At the center of everything is Jesus who invites us to follow Him. I dream of a church where Jesus is the center of everything.


The transformation of the gospel in our lives is the goal of all we do. Transformation of our hearts where we understand and live out grace, transformation of our minds so we think like Jesus, transformation of our priorities so our live reflect the concerns of Jesus and transformation of our relationships so that we see people like Jesus sees them and love them like Jesus loves them. Transformation is not a set of rules and regulations but cooperating with the Holy Spirit to see these four areas that make up our lives resonate with Jesus. I dream of a church where becoming like Jesus is the overriding goal.


Success is defined by spiritual transformation and not by numbers, size, facilities and programs. Too many churches are chasing the wrong dream - size, facilities and programs when the Biblical definition of success is spiritual transformation of people who live, grow and minister in community (Ephesians). I dream of a church where success is not defined by the metrics of the world but by the life change Jesus wants to bring. 


We are outward focused rather than inward focused. Jesus went to where the people who needed him were while we often hope they will come to us at our church. If you look at the typical church programming we are so scheduled with church activities that we have little time to develop relationships with those who need Jesus let alone to get involved in meaningful ways in their lives. I dream of a church where intentional involvement with those who don't know Jesus is the norm not the exception.


Grace and love reign supreme. Each of us who knows Jesus is in His family because he extended His amazing grace to us when we did not deserve it and He loved us with an everlasting love. If He did that for us, we need to do that for one another and for those who don't yet know Him. I dream of a church where His love, acceptance and grace is extended to all and is the magnet that draws people to Jesus.


God's truth is proclaimed in its fullness. God's Word contains all that we need for a life of godliness but it must be taught in its entirety - those parts that we love and those parts that are hard and inconvenient for us to confront. Jesus gladly forgives our sin but also calls us to obedience and followership. He freely gives us grace but tells us not to use that grace as an excuse to sin. The Pentateuch gives us a foundation for a moral and upright life, the historical books examples of people who did or did not follow God, the books of wisdom proclaim the fear of the Lord, the prophets, the heart of God, the Gospels the centrality of Jesus and the epistles the guidance for holy living. I dream of a church that boldly proclaims His truth in its fullness so that we are thoroughly equipped for a life of godliness.


Transparency and authenticity are the rule rather than the exception. Christians are broken sinners, saved by grace who still struggle with all the issues that make up the human condition living in a fallen world. Yet the church is often the last place that we are able to be authentic and transparent about our struggles. I dream of a church where authenticity is celebrated and through transparency we are able to experience and give grace and spur one another on to faithful followership of Jesus.


Our communities are directly impacted by the gospel. Jesus did not come just to change individual hearts. His gospel is designed to have a profound impact on society through the influence of His followers as they live out their faith in their circles of influence, neighborhoods and workplaces. Jesus Himself asked us to pray that His will would be done on earth as it is done in heaven. I dream of a church that takes seriously His call to be salt and light in their community and influence their community with the love, righteousness and grace of Jesus.


All people are equally loved, cared for, appreciated and ministered to. Jesus loved all and He had special compassion and love for those whom the rest of society spurned whether wealthy tax collectors, beggars, the poor, the lame and sick or prostitutes. All were welcome at his table, in His crowd and in His family. We cannot live out the life of Jesus or His gospel without caring about all people, not simply the ones who we are comfortable with. I dream of a church that goes out of its way to find and minister to the marginalized in society.


The reputation of Jesus is always lifted high. Congregations, like people, either lift high the reputation of Jesus or drag Him down to our level in the minds of others through our behavior, love or lack of it, grace or lack of it. Fighting and bickering congregations hurt the reputation of Jesus while those who live in unity, even in the hard times, lift it up. I dream of a church that places His name and reputation higher than its own wants and desires and always chooses behaviors that will lift Jesus high. 


And you, what do you dream for the church?

His mercies are new every morning

In every situation we face in life, we have two choices: to focus on our issues and problems or to focus on God's mercy and faithfulness. Which we focus on determines our attitude, response and faith. 


We often sing the great hymn, Great is Thy Faithfulness but many do not know the origins of that hymn. The year was about 586 BC and the Babylonians had just conquered Judah, destroyed the city, torn down the wall, decimated the temple and carried most of the population into captivity. 


The prophet Jeremiah is wandering through the wreckage of what had been Jerusalem, now a burned, destroyed hulk of a city. There was nothing to be joyful about. The sin of the people had brought the judgement of God after many warnings. So distraught was Jeremiah that the short book he wrote is called Lamentations meaning sorrows.


But in the middle of that song of sorrow, Jeremiah makes this profound statement:

Yet, this I call to mind

and therefore I have hope:

Because of the Lord's great love

we are not consumed, 

for his compassions never fail.

They are new every morning;

Great is your faithfulness.

I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion,

therefore I will wait for him."

(Lamentations 3:21-24)

There is a reason the hymn, Great is Thy Faithfulness, is sung at funerals and in seasons of turmoil. Like Jeremiah this is when we most need to remember and trust in the faithfulness of God. 

Whatever our situation today. However discouraging it may be. However great our anxiety or sorrow we can say with Jeremiah, "Great is your faithfulness" and allow that to be the basis of our hope, our trust, and a better future. Not only that but "His compassions never fail and are new every morning." There is no new day we face where we do not experience the mercies and compassions of our faithful father.

Dysfunctional families of origin

At fifty five, I realize that I still am deeply impacted by my family of origin (what ever happened to growing up?). Our formative years are just that - formative and they stay with us forever. Some of us are more fortunate than others in our families of origin. Some bear great scars that still feel raw to this day. And, none of us grew up in a perfect family and my own children will deal with dysfunctions that I was responsible for. However,  there are three questions that I believe can help us see our lives in perspective.


One: What can I thank God for relative to my family of origin? Who we are today is in large part the result of our early years. My understanding of Scripture came from terribly early morning devotions, but those devotions informed my view of Scripture and of God. My love of people from all over the world came from the cross cultural experience I had growing up in Hong Kong and the amazing hospitality which my parents exhibited in welcoming all to our home. If I made a list (and it is a good idea) of the may blessings I experienced from my family of origin it would be long. 


Two: What do I need to forgive my parents for? No parents are perfect and their understanding of parenting is a factor of their generation, their spiritual place and their situation in life. I am the first to admit that my kids, Jon and Chip will need to forgive me for parenting mistakes, perhaps that I am not even aware of. Our own parenting skills are a mix of what we saw that we appreciated and what we experienced that was painful. At some point we need to forgive our parents for the painful just as our children will need to forgive us for the same. Ironically we are best suited to raise kids when our grand kids come along.


Forgiveness for the failing of our parents is critical to our own freedom and reflects our own humble evaluation of our own parenting. All of us are in need of God's grace and the grace of others. No parents did it all right. The sooner we forgive, the sooner we are able to deal with the scars we gained early in life.


Three: How do we see God's hand in our personal history? Our upbringing is a mixture of good and bad, happy and sad, levels of family dysfunction and for some, very deep wounds. However, it is an amazing thing to consider how God got us from there to here? How we can see His invisible hand in our personal history to mold us into who we have become and how he presently uses us. Only God has the ability to use both the good and bad of our past and redeem it for His perfect purposes in our present. Only He can change our human scars into divine scars usable by Him.


Ultimately we are not who we are primarily because of our parents but because of the faithfulness of God through our history. Think deeply how God has been present in your history, in your childhood, in all of the events of your life, bringing you to your present place and you will be encouraged. Whether we have much to be thankful for in our upbringing or the need to forgive much that was painful and hurting, the one constant is always the presence of a loving father who brings us to where we are today, redeeming the pain and using all of who we are to impact our world today. Whatever our experiences, God was there in their midst and the proof of that is where He has you today.


I am a far more humble parent than I was when my first son was born. I realize more clearly than ever my own brokenness and that realization helps me forgive the hurts from my own childhood. I hope my children do better than me but know that they deal with their own brokenness and in the end it is the grace and love of Jesus that makes the difference for all of us.

Jesus: the intersection of grace and truth

If someone were to describe you what would they say? How would you like the job of describing Jesus? How does one even begin to comprehend Him?

The Apostle John, described the incarnation and the incarnate One this way. "The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth (John 1:14)."

The One and Only, from the Father - full of grace and truth. The emissary of the unseen God bringing the two things that the world, and each of us, need most: grace and truth.

Truth is in short supply on our globe. The perfect world created by God was hijacked by Satan and his minions and the loss of truth was one of the consequences of the fall. In its place, Satan and fallen mankind manufactured versions of truth that suited them: False gods that promise everything but cannot deliver anything, but even more ironic, gods that leave us emptier than before. Everyone is chasing some version of "truth" but Jesus came with the Truth about God, man, sin, salvation and how to find fullness of life. Jesus brought truth and Jesus is truth! Want to know truth? Get to know Jesus!

The truth deficit brought about by the fall brought with it all the brokenness that we face personally and corporately in our world. And then comes Jesus, full of grace! All of the unfathomable grace of God in Jesus. Grace to cover the brokenness of tax collectors, prostitutes, the sick and lame, the rich and poor - you and me. Forgiveness with restoration. Grace that we can share with others as the grace of Jesus overflows from our lives.

Jesus is the perfect intersection of grace and truth - and therefore our deepest needs. Neither is complete without the other. Together, they change the trajectory of our lives forever. As you think about the incarnation, think grace and truth. Celebrate these two gifts of the Father to us.

What does God want for you today?

Take a moment and consider what God wants for you today. We often consider what He wants of us but what does He want for us?


There is no better answer to that question than the blessing that God Himself gave to the priests in Numbers 7:24-26 to pray over the Israelites. This is His wish, His blessing, His commitment to you, His promise to you today.

The Lord bless you and keep you;

the Lord make his face to shine upon you;

and be gracious to you;

the Lord turn his face toward you

and give you peace.

That is an amazing statement from the God of the universe to us. As you walk through your day today, God is going to bless you. His face is turned toward you and offers you peace no matter the circumstances of your life. And He will be gracious to us! Wow!

What more needs to be said? And just so we would get it, He sent His Son to deliver the message personally.

Hope and Grace 2007

Every December 4 through January 14 since 2007 I daily read the blog www.reachtj.blogspot.com as a remembrance to the hope we have in Jesus and the grace that he extends so freely to us. The blog is the account of my 42 day hospital stay from which I never should have survived - but God gave my family hope and He extended to me  the grace of an extension of life for which I am eternally grateful. 

The battle between life and death started on December 4 when I entered the hospital unable to breath. They quickly determined that I was in congestive heart failure and had massive pneumonia and a huge pleural effusion (a collection of fluid in the wall of the lung-like having a liter of pop stuck inside your lung wall). What they would not know for a week was that it was MRSA  or Methicyllin resistant staphylococcus aureas- a "super bug" pneumonia. This would lead to septic shock, Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome, a failed mitral valve in my heart, high fevers that required ice cooling jackets, the shutting down of some of my organs, heartbeats of 220 or higher without the ability to shock my heart back into rhythm - all this while I was in a coma and on a ventilator. On a number of occasions the doctors gathered the family to prepare them for my imminent death.

Amazingly God gave my wife, Mary Ann, hope two days into this ordeal. Two days later was the day that I told her I believed I was going to die. It was the day that they would put me on a ventilator from which I should not have woken up alive. It was the day that I could barely breath as I felt I was drowning in my own fluids. But two days before that day as she sat by me bed she asked Jesus, "How should I pray?" And God replied in an audible voice (to her), "It will be very close, but T.J. will live." A voice of hope when there was no human hope. A voice of hope that she clung to during the next weeks of a life and death struggle. When the doctors gently told the family there was no hope she stood on the hope God had given her. She was a rock of faith as were my sons Jon and Chip who walked through the dark days with her and became men in the process.

Our family experienced amazing grace during and after those days. Our prayer partners came to pray and love on the family. Friends gathered around and sheltered them in their love. And time and again, God gave His grace when it was needed. One night as my youngest sister was standing by my bed angry with God tired and discouraged, she felt a hand on her shoulder. Immediately she knew that it was going to be OK whether I lived or I died. She turned to see who was there but there was no one. She knew she had been touched by God or an angelic being. On another day, a nurse came in tears to Mary Ann and said through tears, "I was just in T.J.'s room and God gave me a vision of him alive and well!"

Most of all we were blessed through the thousands who prayed for God to do something miraculous and extraordinary. It is the faith and prayers of thousands around the world whom God answered in His sovereignty in choosing to heal my broken heart, clear my lungs, defeat MRSA, septic shock, cool the fevers until the day I walked out of the hospital on January 14, a product of His grace.

God gives us hope in all situations and His grace is with us always. Think back to the situations you have been in where He has shown you His hope and His grace and never forget. Never forget! It is His grace that sustains us day to day, it is His hope that walks with us through the dark nights of the soul that we all experience. Someone asked me, "How do you remember?" One of the ways I remember is to read the blog put up for me daily from December 4 to January 14. It is a month of remembrance for me. On that I will follow until I see Him and can thank Him in person. 

I am a walking billboard of God's hope and grace. So are you. Never forget. Always live in thanks for His hope and grace. 

http://www.reachtj.blogspot.com/

Graciousness

The interactions of Jesus with people overflowed with graciousness, gentleness and love. The only exception was when He dealt with the Pharisees and hypocrites (often one and the same) where he appropriately rebuked their heart attitudes. But think of his interaction with the woman at the well, Mary and Martha, Nicodemus, the blind man Bartemaeus and the list could go on. People gravitated to Jesus because of His love, His unconditional acceptance and the grace which He exuded.

Contrast that with the way we often deal with one another in God's family. Hard words, unnecessary barbs, sharpness, putting others down or in their place, calling into question motives, anger, irritation, unforgiveness and words that once spoken or sent in an email cannot be taken back. There is a great deal of ungraciousness among God's people that is incompatible with the example of Jesus and the teaching of the New Testament.

Think about Paul's letter to the Ephesians on this subject. "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths but only what is helpful for building others up...Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other...Be imitators of God...and live a life of love...(Ephesians 4-5)." Or Romans: "Live in harmony with one another...live at peace with everyone...Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another...(Romans 12-13)."

There are times when we must have hard conversations but even in those they can be done with graciousness. Perhaps the hardest people to be gracious to are those we are closest to because it is easy to take them for granted - a spouse or colleague. The test of our graciousness is not those so much we don't know but those we do know and whose weaknesses we are well aware of.

I want to be known as a gracious leader, friend, husband and colleague. There are days when I fail miserably but my desire is to see people and treat people as Jesus did. This includes kindness and warm courtesy, tact, a merciful and compassionate nature, sympathy, and politeness. It is what my late uncle Warren had that caused us all to want to be around him. He was the definition of graciousness and it was a magnet to others.

Loving others is the foundation of graciousness toward them. Further, they are men and women made in the very image of God. Harsh attitudes don't come from God - loving attitudes do.

Dissappointment with God

The longer we live the more disappointments we incur in life: some major and life changing, some less so but disappointments nonetheless. They come in the form of illness, injustices, things beyond our control and some change our lives forever. It is the nature of life. All of us experience them, none of us are exempt. At 55, I have a long list of them.

The question is not whether disappointments will come but how we will choose to deal with them. There are three common responses, the first being bitterness toward God. We would not label it as such but it is there, lying just below the surface for many people. That bitterness distances them from God because if He is responsible for our pain, what can be said about His goodness, His love, His reliability and His care for us? 

But think about this: "It is easy to blame God for bad things that happen in this world. The truth is that in blaming Him we are doing something even more terrible. We are blaming the perfect and holy God who created a perfect and holy creation for the sin that we as humans brought into the world in rebellion against Him. In essence, He created a perfect world, but we rebelled and now blame Him for the imperfect world. We ask why He allows bad things to happen, why He tolerates injustice and evil and sorrow and pain. Blame is heaped on the One who sought the very best for men and women made in His image who instead chose to rebel and go their own way. That is the greatest possible transfer of responsibility ever (When Life Comes Undone, p. 52)."


Bitterness toward God is exactly what the evil one wants for our lives for he is in the business of stealing, killing and destroying (John 10:10). His lie is that God is responsible for the evil in our world while the truth is that we are responsible for that evil along with the evil one. Blaming the creator and therefore alienating ourselves from Him is one of the classic lies of Satan who uses that lie to destroy our relationship with God. 


A second response to the disappointments we incur is to simply decided to settle for a diminished life. To allow a profound sadness to permeate our lives, steal our joy, rob our passion and hold us hostage to our pain. Again, the evil one has won because he has stolen from us what God intended for us (John 10:10). In that same verse, Jesus says, "I have come that they may have life and have it to the full." Jesus said this knowing all the issues we would face living in a fallen world and still He promises that He will give us life and life to the full. 


A third response is to press into our loving Savior, with faith that He is who He says He is, Has our lives in His hands, redeems pain for His purposes, and turns our human scars into divine scars if we will allow Him to. And that, He is with us in our pain for He experienced the same kind of pain when he walked our earth so that we can "approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need (Hebrews 5:16)."


Choosing to trust God in the disappointments of life is the essence of faith. It is choosing to trust when we don't see the end and cannot understand the rationale. It is trusting God when we cannot see the answers we seek or the end we desire. Read again that great definition of faith in Hebrews 11:1. "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. This is what the ancients were commended for."


In the disappointments of life we cling to what we hope for in Jesus and we believe in what we do not presently see - knowing that He has provided the hope and that He sees what we do not see. And in that choice, we choose life, we choose trust, we choose faith, we choose Him and the fullness of life which He promises despite our circumstances or pain.


All of us suffer from disappointments in life. Which choice are we making today?

Ten markers of grace filled people and congregatons

There are ten characteristics of congregations that are grace filled. These ten markers set them apart from the vast majority of congregations in the world. All are directed toward other people but come out of hearts that have been radically transformed by the grace of Jesus in their own lives. Congregations that have these markers are like magnets to believers who have never experienced this kind of grace and to spiritual seekers who encounter a new kind of Christian in those who exhibit these Jesus traits. Think about these markers in your life and their power when multiplied throughout a congregation.


Grace filled people assume the best of one another. Every relationship is one assumption away from misunderstanding and misunderstandings create relationship breakage. Usually, however, our assumptions about the intention of the other party are wrong: they did not intend to cause us pain. Assuming the best of others and their actions is a grace thing to do and it prevents unnecessary relational breakage.

When an offense has been committed either by us or against us, grace filled people quickly move to repair the relationship where that is possible. They are quick to forgive and resist holding onto offenses committed.


Grace filled people cultivate generous rather than critical spirits towards others. There is plenty to be critical of others about just as Christ could be deeply critical about us. Like Him we choose to love rather than criticize and cultivate as spirit of acceptance (a critical spirit is really a spirit of non-acceptance). Critical spirits also come from our own pride.

Grace filled people love to extend grace to those who need it and we all do - often. It is grace to forgive, to give people the benefit of the doubt, to love those who have fallen, to accept those who are struggling with sin, addictions or just the consequences of the fall. When hard words need to be said, they are always said in love rather than in condemnation. Their goal is always restoration and health.

Grace filled people are transparent about their own issues, struggles and failures in appropriate settings. They don't pretend that they have it all together (none of us do). They are willing to share their struggles because they are not living with masks or pretense. It takes only one man to share his struggle with porn, to send a message to many others also struggling in secret that there are others like them and it is OK to admit one's need. Transparency is the first step toward growth.


Grace filled people love to pray for others. In grace filled congregations it is a common sight to simple see people in conversation and then being prayed for. Issues of life are quickly lifted up the the throne without embarrassment or apology. Taking people and their situations to the throne of God is valued, practiced and habitual. 


Grace filled people love the unloved, those who live on the margins, those who the rest of society forget or shuttle to the side. This includes the poor and the disabled. Just as Jesus had a radar for the down and out so do grace filled people. They have cultivated the heart of God for all people, not just people like them. This is one of the reasons that grace filled congregations are always involved in the community, meeting needs and sowing love.


Grace filled people love to love on others. Words of encouragement, acts of kindness, help in crisis. They are lovers of people because people matter to God. When opportunities to help others come across their path they do what they can to help, to love and encourage.


Grace filled people speak with kind, encouraging and loving words. Words that lift, words that encourage, words that build up, words that quiet anger. People leave their presence with a greater sense of their worth and knowing that they are loved. 

Grace filled people always point people toward the source of all grace - Jesus. They are not content to be people of grace but want others to know the source of that grace. They love to introduce others to the the One from whom all grace flows, Jesus.

I wish for this kind of grace in my life and I wish for this kind of grace in my church - and in all churches.