Growing health and effectiveness

A blog centered around The Addington Method, leadership, culture, organizational clarity, faith issues, teams, Emotional Intelligence, personal growth, dysfunctional and healthy leaders, boards and governance, church boards, organizational and congregational cultures, staff alignment, intentional results and missions.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Goal based budgeting

Ministry budgeting is often a simple exercise of doing what one did the year before with the requisite addition or subtraction depending on the economy. This makes sense for fixed costs.

However, when it comes to non fixed costs consider an alternative - goal based budgeting where the budget is based on the goals and plans of the ministry division or team and the results of its prior year's goals. This budgeting strategy sends the most resources to those ministry divisions that get the best results, deliver on their plans and have the greatest vision. It rewards those who deliver on their ministry plans and withholds resources from those who don't.

Goal based budgeting also calls the question on ministry teams or divisions that do not live up to their plans or who have deficient vision or execution. Honest evaluation of results is not a strength of many ministries. Goal based budgeting helps evaluate success since it is based both on future plans as well as on past performance. 

Goal based budgeting is a simple strategy to tie funding to vision and performance.  

An interesting and true comment on this post:
Matt Steen has left a new comment on your post "Goal based budgeting":

This can be a scary thing for many churches because it involves thinking through why they are doing what they are doing and then asking the question "how are we doing at it?"

This is also a very good thing for churches to start doing because it forces them to think from vision rather than tradition. This is also one of my favorite things to do with our clients.


Thursday, May 19, 2011

Sometimes our best action is no action

We are an action oriented society. Have a problem? Go fix it! Need something? Figure it out. The larger the problem, the harder we work. I understand that as a "strategist," "maximizer," and "achiever," in the Strengths Finder terminology. 

But.

Sometimes our  best move is to make no move until we have been still before God long enough to wait and listen for His promptings, or to allow Him to move on our behalf for us. Sometimes our biggest work is to resist our temptation to do anything at all and simply "wait on the Lord," and see what He does on our behalf.


Throughout the Psalms we have numerous references from David of waiting on the Lord for Him to act on His behalf. And that from a man of action, a warrior who understood that there were times to act and times to simply wait for God' to act on His behalf. As David wrote in Psalm 121:1-2, "I lift up my eyes to the hills- where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth."


Perhaps we too often try to solve issues that God would like to solve for us if we were patient and waited on Him! Or, we act prematurely before He gives us the conviction that it is time to act. Our own level of anxiety can cause us to act prematurely and sometimes unwisely when waiting on God in prayer would have saved us problems and given Him time to act on His own.


This is particularly true in instances where we try to convince others to solve some problem in their lives (acting for the Holy Spirit - bidden or not bidden) rather than praying that the Holy Spirit would act in His way and His time in that individual's heart.


As my own faith has matured, I have learned to act less and pray more about issues facing me. I am constantly amazed at how God creatively solves issues that either could not have solved or in His fashion. When I am tempted to act precipitously I turn to the Psalms and remind myself that "The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore" (Psalm 121:8).



Tuesday, May 17, 2011

How do you think best?

It may be something you have not consciously considered but it is helpful for you to know: How do you think best? Let me explain.

One of the reasons I write and blog is that it is in the discipline of writing that I do much of my best thinking. When I write, thoughts flow, develop and come to life. Sometimes, I have God moments in writing where something profound ends up on paper and I wonder where it came from. This is also why I have usually used manuscripts in my preaching to the chagrin of my homiletics professors.

I have a brilliant friend who runs a global ministry. For years I have suggested he write because his message needs to be heard. But he has struggled with getting it on paper. But when he speaks, his heart flows and the message is clear and the profound thoughts come. What he has discovered is that he thinks best when speaking, not writing. So, using technology, we simply record his speaking in order to capture his thinking.


Another close colleague is the master of dialogue. He thinks best when conversing with others, in the give and take of ideas and questions. In dialogue he forms his thoughts and he is at his best in the give and take of conversation, out of which comes wisdom.

I think my wife does her best thinking when she is in action, especially helping people who are hurting or in need. She shines there and when I listen to her, it is often lessons or insights from these opportunities that she talks about.

One of my closest friends is also one of the deepest thinkers I know. He can focus on an issue for hours, days or weeks. He runs the issue through his mind thinking of alternatives, consequences, options like a chess player who considers all the possible moves based on the move he is going to make. He does his best thinking in the recesses of his mind, quiet and alone.

Songwriters often think the best in the composing of their music and it is the medium of song in which their best ideas form.

God was creative in forming our wiring. All of us have a unique style of thinking and knowing how we do our best thinking is a key to unlocking our full potential. Once we know, we ought to take advantage of that knowledge. So I write..... and you.....

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Great blog on how we treat pastors in America

This is an accurate and important blog on the treatment of those who pastor our churches in the United States.

The daily choice: Be a life giver or a life taker

In John 10:10, Jesus makes a profound statement about himself in contrast to the evil one and it has implications for our daily lives. "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." There is much that can be said about this verse but I want to look at it from the view of a daily choice that we make.

Everything about the evil one is life taking. His goal is to demean, put down, discourage, destroy, and literally suck the joy, purpose and meaning of life from us. He will do anything he can to hurt us, keep us in the bondage of sin, discourage us from living out our calling and lie to us about who we are. He is all about stealing life from us. His greatest joy is to keep us from the Father and a relationship with him. He is a life taker.


Everything about Jesus is about giving life. Through a relationship with him, through forgiveness, through the Holy Spirit in our lives, through the purpose he brings, the joy and peace in spite of circumstances. No one gives life like Jesus. He is the consummate life giver in every way. "I have come that they may have life and have it to the full. He is a life giver.


In the Epistles, Paul often talks about things we are to take off and things we are to take on. The "take offs" are those things from our lower nature and sinful behaviors that are life taking both for ourselves and others. The "put ons" are life giving to ourselves and others. As we take off and put on we become more like Jesus, the one who came to give life and fullness of life.


The daily choice we make is whether we will choose to be life giving to ourselves and others or whether through our words, behaviors and attitudes we will be life taking. When my "cranky" self hurts my wife, I am life taking. When I am critical, unforgiving, impatient with others I am life taking. On the other hand, when I am living with the fruit of the Spirit and the love of 1 Corinthians 13, I am life giving - like Jesus. Think about how Jesus was a life giver to those around Him while the Pharisees were life takers with their legalism and critical, pompous spirits.


None of us want to be life takers but it takes a conscious choice to live like Jesus as a life giver in our relationships, care for others, words, attitudes and the quality of our love. 


There is a reason we love to hang around "life givers." They encourage, accept us for who we are, extend us grace, cheer us on and build us up. Why? They are like Jesus as a life giver. Every morning I ask myself - will I be a life giver or life taker today?

Friday, May 13, 2011

Seven Marks of Gospel Centered Churches

For those of us who are committed to being a gospel centered church there are seven markers that we can pay attention too and intentionally encourage. Progress in these seven areas indicate that we are on the right track.

One: Gospel centered churches see regular conversions because they are focused on sharing the Gospel as a lifestyle. They celebrate new life in Christ, and help their congregation understand that sharing their faith is central to who they are and what they do. And, they keep track of their progress in this area.

Two: Gospel centered churches regularly challenge individuals to consider full time Christian service and see people answer that call. They encourage, support and celebrate those who choose to use their gifts in service of the Great Commission.

Three: Gospel centered churches focus more on life change toward the Image of Christ than on the imparting of theological information. They focus on the transformation of hearts, minds, life priorities and relationships and see regular transformation take place.

Four: Gospel centered churches, like Jesus have a high commitment to biblical compassion and loving the marginalized, neglected, hurting, poor and needy. In fact, they go out of their way to show the love of Jesus to those who others neglect and forget. Like, Jesus they have a love for "all people" not just "their people."

Five: Gospel centered churches are characterized by generosity. Their people are generous with one another when there are needs, generous in giving so that the Gospel is advanced and generous with their time and gifts. Their lives could be called "generous," lived for Jesus and others.

Six: Gospel centered churches have people who are "in the game" in terms of using their spiritual gifts and God given wiring to serve the church and be the hands, feet, and voice of Jesus in their circle of influence. They are intentional in making space in their lives for ministry.

Seven: Gospel centered churches replicate themselves by planting other churches, whether off site venues or independent churches. They intentionally "give themselves away" to see the Gospel penetrate new communities and neighborhoods. It is part of their regular strategy.

No individual or church gets this perfectly but progress in these areas should encourage you that you are on the right track. Celebrate and encourage your people in these directions and your spiritual influence as a congregation will increase.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Seven Marks of Gospel Centered Churches

 For those of us who are committed to being a gospel centered church there are seven markers that we can pay attention too and intentionally encourage. Progress in these seven areas indicate that we are on the right track.


One: Gospel centered churches see regular conversions because they are focused on sharing the Gospel as a lifestyle. They celebrate new life in Christ, and help their congregation understand that sharing their faith is central to who they are and what they do. And, they keep track of their progress in this area.


Two: Gospel centered churches regularly challenge individuals to consider full time Christian service and see people answer that call. They encourage, support and celebrate those who choose to use their gifts in service of the Great Commission.


Three: Gospel centered churches focus more on life change toward the Image of Christ than on the imparting of theological information. They focus on the transformation of hearts, minds, life priorities and relationships and see regular transformation take place.


Four: Gospel centered churches, like Jesus have a high commitment to biblical compassion and loving the marginalized, neglected, hurting, poor and needy. In fact, they go out of their way to show the love of Jesus to those who others neglect and forget. Like, Jesus they have a love for "all people" not just "their people."


Five: Gospel centered churches are characterized by generosity. Their people are generous with one another when there are needs, generous in giving so that the Gospel is advanced and generous with their time and gifts. Their lives could be called "generous," lived for Jesus and others.


Six: Gospel centered churches have people who are "in the game" in terms of using their spiritual gifts and God given wiring to serve the church and be the hands, feet, and voice of Jesus in their circle of influence. They are intentional in making space in their lives for ministry.


Seven: Gospel centered churches replicate themselves by planting other churches, whether off site venues or independent churches. They intentionally "give themselves away" to see the Gospel penetrate new communities and neighborhoods. It is part of their regular strategy.

No individual or church gets this perfectly but progress in these areas should encourage you that you are on the right track. Celebrate and encourage your people in these directions and your spiritual influence as a congregation will increase.

Scalability and growth

A secret of successful ministries is that they understand and build scalable systems that allow for growth rather than non scalable systems that stifle growth.

I remember doing a consultation for a church of 1,000+ and discovered in talking with the elders that they provided all the care for those in the congregation who were hurting. And, they were tired! What they had was a non scalable system for care because nine folks cannot provide care for a growing church. A scalable system of care would be where the care function resides in small groups which are easily reproducible as the church grows. 

In youth work, a non scalable system is one where the youth leader personally disciples all the kids. A scalable system is one where the youth leader raises up a team and designs ministry paradigm that allows for any level of growth because it does not all come back to him/her.

A simple test to give you an idea as to whether your paradigms are scalable is this: Ask the question, "If the numbers involved in what we are doing were to double or triple, could our current system accommodate those numbers? If the answer is no you have a non-scalable system. If yes, you likely do.

The reason we should care about this is that non-scalable systems will become a barrier to growth and we might not even know it. The youth worker who tries to personally disciple all his/her kids, may not realize that once their available time is used up as the group grows that growth might just stop as new kids realize that they won't get what they need in that group. Whatever the ministry responsibility we have, if it is not scalable, it will prevent the growth we desire and limit the spiritual influence we have.

As the leader of a missions agency, we constantly have to ask the question of scalability in recruiting, vetting, training, and the many systems within the organization. It is not unusual for us to realize that some system we have is not scalable and needs to be rethought. Everything we and you do in ministry has a system. Some systems are scalable and invite growth. Some are not and stifle growth. 

The good, bad, and ugly when hiring

A classic mistake made by ministries (and indeed non-ministries) when hiring for key positions is to paint an overly rosy picture of their situation. After all, we are recruiting and we want to make a good impression on our potential hire.

BAD IDEA! 

In the first place, none of us like surprises and if our hire finds out that life is not what we painted it there is a measure of trust and confidence that is lost quickly when they see that reality differed from what we told them. This is a simple issue of integrity.

But there is more at stake! Recently I was in a conversation with a ministry leader and a potential senior leader. The ministry is one that has huge potential but there is very significant internal chaos at the moment with a lot of challenges. We laid out the scenario with great candor and I could see the potential leader salivating. His wiring is all about taking something that is broken and fixing it. The chaos was a challenge to him. Where many would see dysfunction (and it is surely there) he saw a job made for him and his skills. 

Another potential hire, when told the "good, bad and ugly," wanted to run for the hills and had he been hired, things would have gone from ugly to implosion. His wiring was very different and had he not heard an honest description he would have come, felt betrayed and most likely turned on the leader because his wiring is not to fix but to take something working well and make it a little better.

Whenever we paint a picture that is different from reality we hurt ourselves because the situation we have must match the wiring and gifting of the potential hire for a successful marriage. When we simply tell the truth we not only gain instant credibility but we have a much better chance of matching the situation with the right gifting.

Be candid when hiring.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

When should a church change their governance system?

Tomorrow afternoon I do another consult with a church leadership team on significantly modifying their governance system. I have at least one conversation with church leaders every week over the frustration governance systems that are out of sync with the current size and needs of the church. So what are the classic signs that it is time to look at how you do governance? 

1. There is frustration by staff on how long it takes to make ministry decisions or changes. Here is the funny thing. Many  board members do not realize how frustrated their staff are on the decision making process. After all, they check in for a board meeting once or twice a week while staff are chomping at the bit to move things forward. Several weeks ago in a dialogue with a board one of the board members gave me the classic line, "Our system works great." I looked over at the senior pastor and asked, "Do you see it that way?" He shook his head NO!

When decisions cannot be made in a timely fashion by the right people it is time to rethink your leadership/governance system.


2. There is confusion about who is responsible for what. This is a common problem as churches grow. Is this a staff responsibility or board responsibility? Where there is confusion there is also room for conflict and misunderstandings. How often do staff make decisions only to be second guessed by a board member who was not in on the decision? That means that the decision has to be rehashed after the fact because there was not clarity up front on who had the authority to make it.


Confusion over who is responsible for what creates conflict and misunderstanding and it is a sign you need to rethink your governance.


3. You have long interminable board meetings. One board I spoke with recently, told me that they had two board meetings a month that went from seven PM to midnight or after. I would have been stunned except it is all too common. No church board should have to meet for more than two hours twice a month on a regular basis!


Long board meetings are a sure sign of a broken decision making system.


4. Permission must be obtained from multiple groups before a decision can be made. Any time a leadership board has to get permission, funding or assent from another committee or board in the church, you are operating on a redundant system that has toll booths built into the decision making process. It is a waste of time, talent and energy.


Toll booths rather than easy pass is a sign you need to revisit your governance.


5. The board has a hard time making decisions. How many boards revisit the same issues over and over again either because they didn't make a clear decision or because they didn't make any decision. It is no wonder that good leaders often decline to serve on the board. 


Revisiting previously made decisions over and over is a sign of a broken governance system.


6. The board does management rather than providing leadership. How many times do we need to say that staff manage the ministry while boards set the overall parameters of the ministry. Yet most boards spend most of their time dealing with management minutia that someone else could be doing. In doing so, they have abdicated their more important leadership role of ensuring that the church is maximizing its ministry impact.


Management by committee (board) is a sure sign of a dysfunctional governance system.


If any of these six markers characterize your board, pay attention and consider re evaluating your governance and leadership systems.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Signs you work in a toxic workplace

Too many people work in toxic environments that destroy their joy, kill their creativity and cause great anxiety. Unfortunately this also happens in the ministry marketplace. Toxic workplaces rob us of the satisfaction that God intends for us to experience in our work. Staying too long in such an environment can bring with it depression, cynicism, a mistrust of others and “coping behaviors” that are unhealthy. If the following descriptors are true of your workplace you ought to consider whether it is time to leave.

Lack of respect from your supervisor or leadership. Respect means that you are valued, that your opinions are taken seriously, that you are not taken for granted and that you are acknowledged for your contribution. Lack of respect eats away at our sense of self-worth and that you are not valued for your work. Lack of respect is often a sign of arrogance or even narcissism in a leader who needs to devalue others in order to add value to themselves.  

Abusive behavior. I just spoke to an individual who has been the target of profane laced diatribes by a well known Christian leader whose conversations to those outside his organization are spiritual and uplifting! His words to his own employees are often demeaning, caustic, often angry and certainly don’t fit the definition of uplifting and encouraging. Abusive behavior whether with words or actions create uncertainty, anxiety and loss of respect.

Unpredictability. A hallmark of stable work environments is an element of predictability in leaders. You understand what their values are, what you can expect from them, where the organization is going and what is expected of you. Leaders who are unpredictable and whose behaviors or values or direction is subject to regular change create anxiety in their staff. That unpredictability is not just a “behavior quirk,” but often a symptom of an unhealthy leader. His or her unpredictability creates instability among staff and that instability is destructive to a healthy workplace.

Leading by fiat. This is the leader who rather than building a shared leadership culture and team simply tells people what to do, how to do it and expect others to jump at their command. They don’t respect boundaries, time, and opinions of others and treat employees as their servants. One thing they rarely keep are the best employees who refuse to be treated like chattel and who want a voice in the work they are doing. This environment leads to high turnover as the best choose to leave if indeed they come in the first place.

Cultures of fear. Unhealthy leaders often create a culture of fear where staff feel that they need to walk on eggshells, cannot be honest with their views and live with constant anxiety that they will not live up to their leader’s expectations. Ongoing or regular fear on the part of staff is a sign of a toxic environment which usually goes back to the leader. Another way of saying this is that where there is constant “drama” there is something toxic taking place.

Narcissistic leaders. The theme here is that it is all about the leader. They take the credit when things go well and blame others when things go south. They are always right and as long as you agree with them you are on the inside. Once you choose to disagree you are marginalized, demonized and placed on the outside. With a narcissistic leader you are either good or bad and that is determined by whether you agree with or challenge them. Narcissistic leaders create paranoid workplaces.

Lack of trust. Where there are significant trust issues in an organization, it is usually a symptom of deep leadership issues. Mistrust indicates that there is not a true team, that collaborative leadership is not possible and is usually a symptom of leaders who are unhealthy. Healthy leaders create trusting cultures and model what trust looks like in their relationships, behaviors and conversation. Lack of trust is deeply toxic and has the affect of creating deeper mistrust.

Bottom line? If you work in a toxic workplace you often don’t even realize how much anxiety you live with or how unhealthy your environment is until you choose to leave and all of a sudden realize that you feel free and are no longer carrying the heavy burdens you have been living with. If your workplace is characterized by any of the seven descriptors listed above, you ought to seriously consider leaving. Life is short and God wants us to use our gifting in positive, meaningful ways that bring joy and satisfaction rather than fear and anxiety. Choose to be courageous and find a healthy workplace.

TJ Addington (Addington Consulting) has a passion to help individuals and organizations maximize their impact and go to the next level of effectiveness. He can be reached at tjaddington@gmail.com.

"Creating cultures of organizational excellence."

De escalating Conflict

Conflicts are easy to get into and harder to get out of. Often they result from a misunderstanding between parties where there is either poor communication or the message is misunderstood. However it happens, when conflict occurs we have three choices: escalate the conflict, allow it to simmer or seek to de escalate.

Usually conflict escalates when we respond out of emotion. All of us have done this. Think about conflict you have had with your spouse and how easy it is to take a shot back when something was said we didn't like and the conflict escalates. Often, it was not even the intention of the other party to create conflict but in our misreading of their intent we responded out of emotion and actually created the conflict. The use of Email has created many misunderstandings because messages are cryptic, dialogue is difficult and one does not hear the tone behind the message.


Here are some ways to de escalate conflict.
First, wait to respond until you have processed your emotion so that you are not responding out of emotion. Remind yourself that what you "heard" may not be what was "intended." If the message from the other came out of their emotion or anxiety, responding with you emotion or anxiety will only escalate the issue. You want your response to be matter of fact, conciliatory and without emotion or anxiety and that often takes some time to process. Until our emotion and anxiety levels are low, our response is likely to escalate rather than de escalate.

Second, rather than assuming the intending message was meant the way it came across, personally (in person, by phone or Internet) clarify the intended message. Questions like, "This is how your message came across to me. Is that what you intended?" can help clarify and will often create the very dialogue needed to come to understanding. 


Third, if there is a significant difference in thinking, work to "normalize" the relationship by acknowledging the difference but keeping the door open for dialogue and not allowing the conflict to destroy the relationship. Once relationships go south it is much harder to resolve the conflict because one then has to solve the relational issue before one can tackle the issue that created the conflict. When we can separate the conflict from the relationship there is a much better chance of resolution.


Fourth, don't allow others to hook you into emotional responses. They may remain emotional but you want to remain as calm and collected as possible. When emotions, anger and anxiety drive the process all kinds of collateral damage takes place. Even if you feel the emotion internally, try not to allow it to express itself in your body language or words.

De escalating  conflict is an art and those who work at it find that they avoid all kinds of unpleasantness, become peacemakers, broker understanding and create healthy workplaces, homes and relationships.


Monday, May 2, 2011

Uncivil discourse and professional heresy hunters

The level of discourse in the public arena, whether in Washington or Madison or town hall meetings has become distressingly low. Talking heads on television do nothing to raise either good discourse, or civility either.

I expect this in the public arena but am distressed by the same lack of gracious discourse in the Christian arena. Take for instance, the many websites and numerous heresy charges against Rick Warren. It is not infrequent that another long missive appears in my in box with new charges of false teaching or character assassination by proxy since he is friends with people who don't have impeccable theology by the standards of the writer. The level of invective and anger is high while the biblical evidence of the charges is beyond low. These folks specialize in taking quotes out of context and calling foul when a careful reading would indicate that the charge has nothing to do with reality. Even if the charges were true (which I don't for a moment believe) the way the message is delivered is "behavioral heresy" as it does not reflect the gracious attitudes of believers. Jesus was full of grace and truth. 

I once was in a meeting where the litmus test was whether I endorsed The Purpose Driven Church (If I did I was in the heretical and suspect camp). I looked at the individual who asked the question and said, "few churches have had the impact that Saddleback has had and the key is that they have a purpose and stick to their purpose. How does your church compare?" That of course was the irony of the question. These are people who like to divide people into groups: those that are right and those that are wrong. They define the rules, see no room for a different way of looking at the issue and are uncivil in their discussions.


Even where robust dialogue must take place (Rob Bell), there is no need to engage in character assassination. It is possible to explore the issues from a biblical perspective while preserving the dignity of the author. I love reading N.T. Wright, for instance and would not agree with all of his conclusions but would never attack his character because I disagree. 


It would be sad to get to heaven and realize that we had split theological hairs so closely that we had done harm to God's people and God's kingdom. There are clearly heretical positions and snake salesmen (think late night TV) peddling themselves. But, there are also many professional critics looking for demons behind many good people and ministries. These are the very endless arguments that Paul warns Timothy to avoid in his letters to him.

My radar goes up when I hear from black and white folks for whom there is no theological gray, who are quick to judge others (see my blog on self righteous), who join groups who look for "false teaching" and seem to find it even among mainstream leaders and whose attitudes do not reflect the graciousness of Christ. 

If the mark of a believer is love, all of our discourse must be marked by civility and love. And we ought to be very careful before we throw stones at fellow believers or their beliefs. Orthodoxy is a wide tent and much of the stone throwing has  nothing to do with orthodoxy but rather with personal preferences or a narrow reading of theology.   

Friday, April 29, 2011

The Dangers of Self-Righteousness

OK, all of us have been guilty of self-righteousness at one time or another – and it is a poison that we need to avoid at all costs. It is an attitude that I am better than you, my sin is less egregious than your sin, my way is better than your way, accompanied by a smugness of personal righteousness because of it.

Why is it so dangerous? First because it is based on a subjective standard (ours) which allows us to categorize our righteousness as higher than another’s and our sin as less egregious than another’s sin. Because it is a self determined subjective standard, it is also hypocrisy at its shining best. We, not God have declared ourselves to be more righteous than someone else and we can always find someone who makes us look good by their lifestyle or behavior.

Second, it is nothing less than pure pride and self exaltation as I am able in my self-righteousness to elevate myself, my spirituality, my conduct above that of others. This attitude is 180 degrees different than the attitude of humility that Jesus teaches. It is candidly the attitude of the Pharisees, smug in their righteousness, rather than that of the tax collectors, sinners and prostitutes who knew their need for God. Jesus condemned the former and embraced the latter.

Third, it is dangerous because it blinds us to our own sin. When I focus on the sin of another, I don’t pay attention to my own sin. Not one of us is holy because of our lifestyle but only through the grace God has bestowed. Not one of us is more worthy of God than another. My sin may be different from your sin and it may be less or more obvious than your sin but we are all sinners to the core, all needing the amazing grace of Jesus and all coming to the same place of equality of sin and grace at the foot of the cross. Anything that takes my eyes off of my own sin and need of God’s grace is dangerous and self deceiving.

Fourth, it keeps me from growing. When I have focused on the faults of others rather than on the faults of my own life, I stunt my own growth. In my attitude of self-righteousness I am far less likely to push into the evil resident in my own lower nature and pay attention to my own issues.

Finally it builds walls either directly or indirectly.  It builds walls directly, when I put down others for their faults when I should be focused on my own rather than theirs. It builds walls indirectly even if I say nothing because the attitude of my heart will be conveyed by my treatment of others, my body language, the subtleties of my communication or the lack of engagement because of my own self-righteous arrogance.

There is nothing pleasing to God about self-righteousness. In fact, this is how Jesus saw the self righteous. “To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men – robbers, evildoers, adulterers – or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up at heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God have mercy on me, a sinner. I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted (Luke 18:9-14).”


We need to guard against self-righteousness. We also need to remember that whole groups, congregations, theological movements, seminaries and denominations can bear the marks of self righteousness in their attitudes toward others. None of it smells good to God and all of it is arrogant, prideful, sinful, and self-delusional.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Hoarding

It is an amazing TV program – Hoarding – about individuals whose homes turn into massive junk piles of hoarded stuff, new (shopping issues), old (garbage) and interesting collections totally out of control. It often takes trucks to clean the pile out.

My purpose is not to criticize those who suffer from this condition as there are usually underlying psychological and neurological issues at play. Rather it occurred to me as I watched that the same thing easily happens in our own lives – hidden inside – just like the homes of hoarders look pretty normal from the outside.

It is the accumulation of stuff in our lives that start to distract us from our calling and a healthy life. It can be the accumulation of the expectations of others, out of control schedules, and distractions that keep us from time with God and living out our calling. It can be relational disconnects, attitudes, sinful tendencies, addictions or simply issues that we know we should address but have not. Over time, the accumulation of this stuff in our lives becomes a burden, a distraction, and we long for the simplicity of a life without the junk – good junk and bad junk that we ought to shed. The truth is that like hoarders, we often do not even realize that we are accumulating stuff in our lives that is unhealthy – it just creeps up on us.

How do we clean out the rooms of our lives and shed that is distracting? Periodically, we ought to ask ourselves some reflective questions:
  • Is there anything in my life that the Holy Spirit has been talking to me about?
  • Are there any relationships that are broken where I could seek reconciliation?
  • Do I have anyone that I need to forgive?
  • Are there things in my schedule that are good but that distract me from the best?
  • Are there some key commitments I need to make that I currently don’t have time for?
  • How am I doing with spending time with God?
  • Is my relationship with my spouse and children healthy, vibrant and growing?
  • What one thing could I change today that would make a major difference in my life?

Dealing with the accumulated stuff in our personal lives can be a liberating and deeply freeing experience. Living with the stuff we hang on to but that we don’t need or don’t want keeps us from being everything we want to be.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Humble Church

When you think of your church would you characterize it as humble or prideful? Congregations, like people can live with either pride or humility.


Take a congregation that has been highly successful in its day but is now struggling. They desperately need to change the way they do leadership, they need new organizational structures and they need to trade out a tired staff who are locked into paradigms that are twenty years old. Yet, leaders cannot make the radical shifts necessary or admit that there is a need for change. The reason? Pride! It means accepting the fact that they are in trouble, accepting the fact that they are not who they once were, accepting the fact that they actually need help. Accepting the fact that they cannot rest on their past success but must radically reinvent the future.



This raises an important issue. Ministry success for a church often brings with it a level of pride that hinders the future effectiveness of the church. Pride is by nature a self-sufficient attitude along with the belief that we have ministry figured out and we are good at it. That pride takes our eyes off of Christ, focuses it on us, prevents us from seeing what we need to see and prevents us from learning from others. It may "work" for a season but it will "hurt" in the end.

In my experience, churches like the ones I have described above don't get their act together until they have been humbled and realize that they need help. Some never do and simply fade into an obscure future, living on the shadows of the past, believing all is well.

Humble congregations are forged by humble leaders (both lay and professional) who know they are dependent on God for any lasting spiritual fruit, are learners by nature and live with the awareness that they never have it all together. They are always willing to learn from others and guard their hearts against the pride that will sabotage their success.

Is your church a humble church or proud church?

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Grace, Transparency and the Church

One of the advantages of my work is that I get to visit many different churches each year - both in the US and globally. What is interesting to me is the continuum between churches with great personal transparency and those where such transparency is both lacking and most likely not safe. For some reason it is OK to struggle with sin and the issues of life prior to salvation but once saved, most evangelicals feel that they need to live up to some standard or culture that prevents honest transparency on issues that would actually aid in the process of sanctification.

It has often been said that if you want to get honesty go to the local bar rather than the local church. That is a sad commentary where it is true.

What we are left with are individuals who secretly struggle with all the baggage of life including addictions, sexual sin, temptations, attitudes, or basic identity issues and the very place where these struggles should be worked out - is often an unsafe place to reveal them. There are some wonderful exceptions to this where transparency and realness is practiced in a culture of grace and it is in those settings that I believe the most life change takes place because there is not a need to hide. Rather there is a shared journey toward wholeness, healing and Christ's character.

What sets such churches apart from the norm? I would suggest that there are several key factors. 

First, these churches have pastors and staff who value transparency and model it themselves. There is nothing more powerful than honest transparency from the pulpit. Like all organizational culture, this starts with a leader who communicates grace, acknowledges their own place in their spiritual journey and examples from their own lives. The more appropriate transparency there is from the pulpit the more transparent the culture of the congregation.

Second, transparent congregations tell many honest stories of life transformation. It takes one story, for instance from a couple who have struggled in their marriage and found healing and restoration to make it permissible for others who are struggling to admit their need for healing as well. Multiply those stories across the wide range of struggles people face and the healing that Christ brings. All of us, after all are on a journey of healing and spiritual formation. Telling stories of God's grace makes that journey from brokenness to wholeness normative and expected. People need to be know and encouraged that God can take their brokenness and redeem it no matter how broken they are.

Finally, these are congregations that understand and major on grace. We often focus on the need for grace to come to Christ. The truth is we need as much grace after salvation as before. We need grace every moment of every day. We cannot live up to God's expectations - or our own - unless we are living in the power of God's Spirit and daily appropriating His grace. The church is a place for broken people, those who are broken and need Christ and those who know Christ and need wholeness. 

Grace filled congregations are also humble congregations. They do not pretend to have it all together. They have leaders who admit their sin and live in dependence on God rather than in pride or self sufficiency. 

Church cultures like all organizational cultures are either accidental or deliberately created. A culture of grace and transparency can be deliberately developed. Grace and transparency encourage vulnerability and vulnerability is the first step toward growth. The church should be the premier place where we can journey from brokenness to wholeness.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

On this Day

On this day:
  • Satan was defeated
  • The Father's face was no longer turned away
  • Sadness turned to joy
  • People could be reconciled to God
  • The Holy Spirit would become available to each of us
  • All distinctions between individuals were erased at the cross
  • The church was the logical outcome as His bride
  • It became possible through the Holy Spirit to walk in the Spirit rather than in the flesh
  • Despair turned to amazed hope
  • The empty cross became the mark of the church
  • Reconciliation between brothers could mirror the reconciliation between God and us
  • All sin had been paid for
  • Jesus' scars would remain forever in testimony to the cross
  • God's D-Day had been won. Now it is just a matter of time before evil is put away for good.
  • A thief was already in heaven
  • Jesus honored all women by appearing to Mary Magdalene first
  • A cosmic spiritual shift took place in creation
  • We could now also look forward to resurrection
  • Every principality and power was defeated
  • Satan realized that his apparent victory was a colossal defeat
  • We live with resurrection hope
  • The law was eradicated and completed
  • The tomb was empty
  • Because His tomb was empty, our tomb will one day be empty
  • "He is Risen" changes everything!

Friday, April 22, 2011

The Day After

What do you think it was like the day after the crucifixion of Christ? Did Pilot wake up with a guilty conscience and wonder if he had done the right thing? Did the guards who had mocked Jesus and then seen Him on the cross, wonder if an innocent man had died? Did the crowds who had called for His life keep an embarrassed silence in a quiet Jerusalem? Someone was nervous for they asked the Roman garrison to post guards at His tomb. On the day after, Jesus' friends mourned, the Romans were nervous and some who had watched the execution were sure He was the Son of God.

It had to be like a day like no other in Jerusalem. It had to be a day of quiet and consideration. It had to be a day of sober doubt after a day of impetuous action. I'll bet there were many disturbed consciences that day. The day between death and resurrection. A day of uncertainty and guilt. A day of hopelessness and sadness. 

We have days like that! I have experienced whole periods of life that hang between hope and despair. Uncertainty reigns. Sadness is prevalent, maybe dominant. It us the time in between life as it was and life as it will be - but not yet knowing what will be. It is the dark night of the soul with all the questions, uncertainties and unknowns.

It is the day between Good Friday and Easter Sunday. It is real and it hurts and all of us experience it just as the disciples did, only in different ways. But there is another day coming...we know and we look forward to that day of hope. Always remember in the day of despair. The morning comes, and it comes with hope and resurrection power and salvation. In the in-between times, we need the words of Habakkuk, "Be still and know that I am God." Easter comes and so does Hope.
 

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Seven Marks of Faithful Friends

Friendships obviously exist at many different levels but it is the deepest friendships that mold us, shape us and encourage us in our walk with Christ. Those friendships, that have stood the test of time are one of the most precious and important gifts we can ever experience. In many ways, they mirror the faithfulness of Jesus to us because they reflect His friendship with us.

What are the marks of such friendships?

They have withstood the test of time. How many friendships that you thought were deep went by the wayside in some church conflict or over some small event? Faithful friends are those who have proven themselves faithful in good times and dark times and over a long period of years. Like Jesus, you just know they will be there for you.

They motivate us to be more like Jesus. Their commitment to followership of Christ is an ever present reminder to us to follow well. All of us need that kind of encouragement in a world that is rushing to please self rather than follow Jesus.

They always encourage. There are plenty of people and circumstances ready to discourage and take shots. Faithful friends, like Jesus are patient, kind, and always encouraging. They are a refuge from the disappointments that life and others cause us.

They speak truth into our lives with the gentleness of Christ. I am always amazed at how gentle Jesus is with us. So are faithful friends. They give us perspective, help us think through issues, probe our lives but in gentle and kind ways that always communicate their love. Perspective communicated with love and kindness by people who have earned our trust is a wonderful gift. 

They share their lives. Faithful friends are openhanded and open books. They allow us to know them and encourage us to be known. 
In that mutual sharing, we are understood and we understand and iron begins to sharpen iron. Being known and understood by another is a great comfort because we know we are worthy and valued and loved.

They love us unconditionally. How many of us are fearful that if someone knew the real us - with all our scars and woundedness that they would not really love us? With faithful friends, like with Christ, we don't have to prove ourselves but can just be ourselves. In fact, it is these friends who show us what the Father's love is like because they know us really well and still love us really deeply.

They make an investment in relationships. Faithful friendships, like marriage must be nurtured and tended to. Faithful friends make an investment in our relationship with time, attention, care, love, prayer and practical ways. They value the relationship and invest in the relationship.

I am so thankful for faithful friends in our lives. Of all the investments we could make with our time and energy, these friendships, like our relationship with Christ are critically important because these fellow pilgrims walk the road with us in good times and hard times - encouraging us to keep going and keep trusting. Such relationships are priceless.


I thank God for my faithful friends and I want to be a faithful friend.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Church leaders who don't give

I had an interesting email recently from a financial secretary in a local church. His dilemma was that several of the nominees for the leadership board do not give financially to the church and he wondered if he should confidentially tell the pastor. As the financial secretary with knowledge of congregants giving, he is in a delicate position but He astutely understands an important issue: Those who are not generous to their church should not be in leadership positions!

I have previously addressed the question as to whether I think pastors ought to know what members give and will not repeat that here. What I do believe is that it is foolish to put anyone in church leadership who is not financially committed to the church. If Jesus words are truth, that where our treasure is, our heart is also, it should be clear that those who do not give to their church have their hearts elsewhere. How then can they lead with heart and integrity?


Even if they give generously elsewhere, if they do not give to their local church they have disqualified themselves for leadership in that setting. Often, if they are not giving to their local church they simply are not giving.

Leaders call their congregations to a lifestyle of generosity. Those who are not financially generous - in line with their own ability - cannot with integrity call others to such a life. It really does matter.


One pastor I know of a large church has a rule that if he receives strong criticism about the direction of the church he will look at the individual's giving before responding. In the majority of cases, those most disaffected are giving little or nothing. They may be loud voices in congregational meetings but the truth is they are not vested in the ministry and don't deserve to be taken seriously. Their heart is not there! Which is also why they may be disaffected. What is interesting is that often those who posture themselves as being very generous are in fact the least generous. 


If in your culture, pastors do not have access to giving records, my advice to those putting leaders up for nomination is that they ask the financial secretary whether those individuals are giving in a regular and generous way. If the answer is no, I would not put them on the leadership board. 


I would have the same expectation of pastoral staff. They, along with the leadership board set the tone for the ministry and a lack of generosity at that level robs them of the integrity to lead others toward a life of generosity (in money, time, energy and the use of gifts). If our pocketbook is not in the game, we are not in the game. And certainly not our hearts!

If you checked the giving of your current leaders and pastoral staff, either specifically or through a general question, you may find opportunity to sit down and talk with those who are not giving beyond a token amount. It is a discipleship moment for them.