If you want to know how healthy your leader is, check the health of the staff. It tells the story.

Because our own health as leaders spills out into those we lead a key indicator of a leader's health is the health of their staff. Is the staff culture healthy or toxic? Is it functional or dysfunctional? Are staff relatively happy and engaged or relatively unhappy and disengaged. If a leader has led for any length of time, the ethos and culture of their staff is a prime indicator of their own health.

I regularly talk to ministry staff members who describe toxic, fearful and unhappy staff cultures. What they often don't realize is that they are describing the dishealth of their leader. Church and ministry boards for the most part don't get this. They are all too willing to overlook unhealthy and toxic staff cultures as if all is well. The truth is it is not all well. Nor is the senior leader.

Staff cultures almost always reflect the health of the leader. This is why it is critical to have ways to ascertain the relative health of staff members and not to simply take the word of the leader. Controlling leaders control their staff. Dysfunctional leaders create dysfunction on their staff. Insecure leaders shut down candid discussion on their staff. Driven leaders create staff cultures where staff member always feel inadequate -  because their leader does. Grace filled leaders create cultures of grace and empowering leaders create cultures of trust and release people to use their gifting and intellectual capital. Staff cultures almost always reflect the health of dishealth of the leader.

This also means that where staff cultures are unhealthy, boards ought to pay close attention. Of course it presupposes that boards have a desire and way to monitor the health of the staff. Many don't. 

Every board ought to have a way to keep its finger on the health of staff because in doing so they not only protect the staff where necessary but they also get a read on the health of their leader. Good leaders create healthy staff cultures of empowerment, grace, candid conversation and trust. Unhealthy leaders create cultures of mistrust, control, lack of clarity and bureaucracy. There is a big difference. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Leading in the hard times

Leadership is not always what it is cracked up to be. Especially in the hard times when knotty issues must be confronted, staff situations resolved and perhaps the most painful of all, personal attacks endured. Leadership is not for the faint of heart or the easily discouraged.

What separates those who lead well in hard times from those who don't? 

First, those who lead well in hard times do not tend to take the situations as personally as others. Not that it is easy or comfortable. It helps, however, to realize that we are often targets because people disagree with our decisions or don't fully understand situations we cannot be candid about. The price of leadership is that we will be misunderstood at times and that we will be a target because of decisions we must make. 

Second, leadership in hard times is easier when we keep our anxiety low. Anxiety is wasted energy. If we will take the time to gain perspective from others and from God we can usually respond with greater wisdom than when we respond on the fly - or out of anxiety and anger. That is a skill that can be learned even when it is not native to our skill set.

Third, leading in the hard times is easier when we take a long view rather than a short view. In the moment there may be uncertainty and pain and conflict. In the long term good decisions yield health and effectiveness. Thinking long term allows us to weather the short term discomfort. In fact, those who think short term often respond poorly to hard issues because they are not willing to live with short term pain for long term gain.

Fourth, leading in hard times is easier when we trust in God's sovereignty. Sure, not all things are solved this side of heaven. At the same time, God has a way of working things out when we respond in a measured and wise way rather than allowing our emotions to hijack our actions in unhealthy ways.

Leading in the hard times is actually one of the fundamental ways that leaders grow and mature: If we respond with wisdom rather than with emotion.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

The 10 most influential churches of the last century - Ed Stetzer in CT

The 10 Most Influential Churches of the Last Century

There is much to learn from some key trends in the last 100 years of church history. |

Ed Stetzer

Stepping into a new role? Think about the following twelve recommendations

How a new leader steps into a leadership role sets the tone for their new role. It can be a pastor stepping into a new church or a new role or another leadership change. How that transition is negotiated is a critical issue. It takes wisdom and discernment to transition well. A friend who is making such a transition asked me recently what I learned when I stepped into my current role about a decade ago. This was my advice.

One. Only make critical changes in the first year. It is usually wise to take a year to understand what is going on, who the players are and why things are the way they are. In other words, don't act too fast. The caveat is that there may be a critical change that needs to happen in order to move forward. Be willing to make critical changes but also be willing to be patient with others.

Two: Listen to everyone but think grey. Listening and understanding current staff and stakeholders is very important. However, existing staff and leaders will inevitably lobby a new leader for their point of view. Don't commit yourself but think grey where you listen, evaluate but keep an open mind.

Three: Share your vision for the future on a regular basis and dialogue with staff, leadership and constituencies. The operative words are share and dialogue. This is a time to share one's heart and to listen to others. Ultimately as a new leader you need to have a vision for the future. At the same time you need buy in for that vision so it is through dialogue that you together come to clarity.

Four: Watch for the various agendas but don't get roped into them. All organizations have agendas within them. Some are good and some are problematic. As a new leader you want to understand those agendas but you also don't want to get roped into them. Understanding the territory is critical but thinking grey leaves your options open.

Five: Have some trusted people you can talk to. Perspective is critical and wise leaders have people around them to help clarify issues, ask questions and give counsel. Transitional times have many pitfalls and one wants to avoid them if possible. 

Six: Start looking for the people you need around you who can help you move the organization toward the future. New leaders usually need some new people around them who resonate with where they desire to go. The sooner you can get these key other leaders in place the better off you are. This is about developing a team around you who you trust, who are in alignment with you and who will work with you to synergistically get to where you need to go.

Seven: Evaluate how your predecessor did their job and how you want to do your job. Just because your predecessor did their job a certain way does not mean that you need to. That is important because they were not you and those you report to need to understand that you will be focusing on what you believe to be most important and it may well be different from the leader you follow.

Eight: Focus on the essential issues and not the many expectations that others will have for you. New leaders need to decide what is important and focus there. They also need to resist the pressure to do things as they were done or to meet the many expectations of those around them. This is where it is important to be self defining about what is important to you.

Nine: Evaluate all key staff under you for fit, competency and alignment. Even though it is wise not to make changes too quickly this is a time to evaluate key staff, get to know them and determine future fit. Had I gone with my gut coming into the organization I lead I would have made some wrong calls regarding staff (those who I thought who would not fit who did and those who I thought would fit and didn't). Taking the time to understand key staff will keep you from making assumptions that may be problematic.

Ten: Develop key relationships. All good leadership comes down to relationships because the best leadership is that of influence and influence is a matter of trust and relationship. Take the time before making significant changes to develop the needed relationships. It is the coinage you will need to make the changes.

Eleven: Always run process. Change is inevitable with new leadership but many new leaders hurt themselves badly when they don't do the above before those changes or run good process in making changes. Change without process significantly empties the bank of trust and that is a dangerous thing for a new leader who has not been in place long enough to fill the bank.

Twelve: Be reflective, prayerful and discerning about people, plans, agendas and timing. Usually time is on your side. Relax, watch, listen and talk with Jesus before acting.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Why unexpected disruptions in your ministry can be seen as a gift

Disruptions in our ministries are usually seen as negative things and sometimes that is exactly what they are, especially when they are caused by problematic behaviors. There is, however, another side to disruptions - positive or negative - to consider: They are often the catalyst for us to up our game and refocus our leadership. When things are going well it is easy to become complacent. When that complacency is disrupted by a surprise it is an opportunity to rethink, refocus, realign and reconsider.

I don't welcome disruptions but I have come to realize that every disruption is an opportunity to learn from, to rethink something, to refocus on something that I have probably not focused on for a while and even to rethink my paradigms. Think of these examples:

• A key staff member leaves and it causes us to think carefully about the role they played, how we might configure differently or what we need in the future.
• A staff member behaves inappropriately toward the opposite sex and we are forced to evaluate our training, clarify our expectations and open a dialogue with our staff.
• A financial crisis occurs which prompts us to differentiate between critical ministries and ancillary ministries.
• Something happens that causes us to turn to God for wisdom and solutions, increasing our dependence on Him.
• Something brings conflict to the surface revealing a lack of alignment allowing us to clarify and align.

I could give many more examples but the point is that unexpected disruptions are often an opportunity in disguise - if we will see them as such and take advantage of them. They may be a nuisance but they can also be to our ultimate advantage.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

The genius of the great creeds of the church

Why the church creeds? They came out of a need in the early church to clarify the essential doctrines of the faith, combat error and teach new believers the great and indisputable truths of true faith. In addition, they unify the church around what is truly central and core rather than allowing the many peripheral doctrines of the faith that are not as clear to divide us.

Not all points of doctrine in Scripture are equally clear. I remember one of my beloved seminary professors who when speaking on issues he believed but which were not clearly spelled out would get louder and louder. We knew that the thinner the ice, the louder he was. There are simply some things that we believe that are not all that clearly spelled out - which is why there are various interpretations. An example is the teaching and beliefs around the second coming of Christ. The creeds remind us that Jesus is going to return physically to judge the living and the dead. That is what we do know. Many of the other details are a bit fuzzy. 

I appreciate those who study doctrine to better understand the Scriptures, the nature of God, our own nature and all those topics that find there way into systematic theology. I don't appreciate when believers elevate their particular non essential elements of the faith to the place of dividing believers from one another. If all points of doctrine were equally clear we would not have differences but those differences should not divide believers who can subscribe to the great creeds of the faith - the grand outlines of what we know to be true - and which unify us.

It strikes me that in a world in which there are many more illiterate believers, that the creeds of the church ought to be taught more often or recited together as a congregation. I fear not only that we divide over non-essentials but that many don't understand the essentials. We can argue over the wrong things and we can be ignorant of the right things.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

The Holy Spirit in the leadership equation

The best leadership is a mix of personal health, spiritual depth, leadership skill and a great intangible that is hard to quantify but makes all the difference in the world: The Holy Spirit. If we want to know the mind of God and be open to His counsel it is the Holy Spirit's promptings we need to lead well.

We don't know what we don't know. God does. We don't know all the consequences of decisions we might make. God does. There are all kinds of issues we face as leaders that can help or hurt our leadership and the more attuned we are to the counsel, direction and promptings of the Spirit the better our leadership will be. That is why mere skill is not enough to lead well. The Psalmist said of David that he led with skillful hands and integrity of heart. Skill is necessary but hearts deeply connected to God will multiply the skill because He knows what we don't know.

This is why snap or quick decisions are often counterproductive. They don't give us the time to talk to God about our decisions and listen to whatever He might want to say to us. He may speak to us directly or He may speak to us through other Godly and wise individuals. Either way we are always dependent on the wisdom from "above." Our wisdom is finite. His wisdom is infinite. Taking the time to pray, consider and allow Him to speak into our decision is what wise leaders do.

I cannot list the number of times that a quick decision on my part would have been the wrong decision. We often pride ourselves as leaders as being able to make quick decisions. We should not because quick decisions are often not good decisions because they do not allow us to consult the Lord of the universe who cares about all of our lives. 

Think about what Paul says in 1 Corinthians 2. 

The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. 11 For who knows a person’s thoughts except their own spirit within them? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. 12 What we have received is not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may understand what God has freely given us. 13 This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, explaining spiritual realities with Spirit-taught words.[c] 14 The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit. 15 The person with the Spirit makes judgments about all things, but such a person is not subject to merely human judgments, 16 for,

“Who has known the mind of the Lord
    so as to instruct him?”[d]

But we have the mind of Christ.

We have the mind of Christ....If we take the time to listen. It is the most wonderful gift a leader can have.


All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

If we saw ministry in the United States through missionary eyes we would do things differently

We need a fresh look at ministry in the United States. In fact, we need to see the ministry challenges here through the eyes of a missionary. Here are some of the ways that missionaries look at ministry and the contexts where they work which could change the picture of how we approach ministry in significant ways.

Missionaries do not assume that there is one way to approach ministry. In fact, they are usually very flexible in how they see their context looking first at where there are pockets of people who are open to the gospel and secondly to the methodologies and strategies that might be effective if tried. In other words, most missionaries are not locked into a single paradigm of ministry but need to be highly flexible and entrepreneurial in their approach.

Because of the exploding populations of the world, missionaries are often focused on how to move from addition models of ministry to multiplication models. In the United States we often hire people to do ministry for us rather than truly having to equip others to do meaningful ministry with us. Internationally that is not an option, nor is it Biblical which explicitly teaches an equipping model whether it is Jesus, Paul or Paul's teaching (Ephesians 4:11-12). One of the critical factors in changing the equation of ministry in the United States is that all believers think of themselves as Kingdom entrepreneurs who are called to bring the gospel into all places where God places them and where they have influence.

Nor are missionaries content to think that the only people qualified for significant leadership have a formal theological degree or are full time. We believe that while formal theological education has a significant place for church leaders (pastors) that there are many creative ways to delivering the necessary theological skills and education and that God can use all kinds of individuals who are bi-vocational and part time. It is only in the west where the majority of churches have full time pastors with formal theological degrees and it was not common in the early church as well.

Further, most mission activity is about relational ministry rather than programs. Programs generally (not always) say, bring people here to the church and we will introduce them to Jesus. Relationship based ministry generally says we will go to where people are who don't know Jesus and develop friendships and relationships that can open doors to conversations about Christ and where non-believers can see what our lives look like as we follow Jesus.

In addition, missionaries pay great attention to the large cities in their region as the cities are where people gather and are the centers of influence. In other words while not all ministry internationally is focused on the city a great deal of it is. In the United States we have generally left the city for the comfortable suburbs, leaving great gaps in the large cities of our nation. Internationally we are drawn to the cities like magnets and the opposite is often the case in the United States.

There is another key difference. Internationally we understand that no one group can reach any city or region by themselves. We are forced internationally to work with other denominations to reach the cities and regions in which we work. We know we need one another. We call this a Bride over Brand approach in ReachGlobal where the priority is in multiplying the church and the spread of the gospel over our theological differences. If the United States is going to be reached effectively we need to see our fellow churches and denominations (who are evangelical) as partners and colleagues rather than competitors and a threat. This is a major difference in how we think about ministry.

Internationally we also know that for those who have no felt need for God that when people experience the love of Jesus in very tangible ways that they become open to experiencing the truth of Jesus. In other words, while we start with programming and church activities in the United States we often start with the practical love of Jesus and meeting real needs internationally. 

Here is the truth. All of us can become myopic and locked into paradigms when all we see is our own context. It is when we move out of our context that we are able to look back in and see things that we did not previously see. This is why we need to see our own ministry through missionary eyes. If we were missionaries here how would we see our context, the opportunities, the ministry options, the populations that are open to the gospel, our cities and our opportunities to see ministry in a deeply wholistic way.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Why I write and how it can help you

I like to write because it clarifies issues and I am all about clarity. More than that I desire to help others be all that they can be, so my writing helps me and I hope helps you.

You are free to use any of my posts to help your church, ministry, organization or circle of influence. All I ask is that you attribute it to the blog. Other than that, use whatever is helpful and no permission is needed from me.

I have learned most of what I know from others. I want to pass it on. And I hope it is helpful.  Blessings.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Essential skills for every believer who wants to have influence

It is clear that some individuals have more influence than others. It is not a matter of education or place in life. Rather it is a matter of certain skills that increase our influence with others. These skills are available to everyone and they are essential for believers who want to make a difference for Jesus in their corner of the world.

1. The ability to treat all people with the grace of Jesus. It is the skill of love, acceptance and grace which overlooks flaws, sin and dysfunction and just accepts people for who they are. And then graciously points them to Jesus, the One who is the paradigm of grace.

2. The ability to speak words of encouragement and grace rather than words of condemnation. There is a place for speaking truth but we are too quick to condemn rather than to love, to criticize rather than to encourage and to take the role of the Holy Spirit to fix people rather than to let the Lord work in their lives.

3. The ability to see the potential in people rather then their flaws. We all have flaws. Often we are most critical about the flaws in others that are similar to our own, All of us gravitate to those who accept us as we are and see our potential rather than our fractures.

4. The ability to forgive easily and handle conflict biblically. If we desire influence we need to forgive quickly and resolve differences quickly and with humility. The ability to stay in relationship is one of the most important skills we could develop. It is OK to disagree and still be in relationship. Jesus did it quite well.

5. The willingness to step into tough situations with the love of Jesus and the help that we can give. If we flee from messy situations we lose out on our greatest influence. Being willing to enter into the mess and bring the love or help of Jesus yields great influence.

6. The ability to not get enmeshed with other people's issues which often creates distance from those others are distant from. We control our friendships and need not divide from those others divide from. 

7. The ability to hold our own counsel in tough situations. Sometimes we need to speak truth in love. Often we are better off keeping our thoughts to ourselves and not creating conflict where it is not needed - from us. Wisdom and discernment in what we say and write (email) is a huge part of our influence.

8. The ability to be flexible when things don't go our own way. Drawing unnecessary lines in the sand divides rather than unites. Influence requires flexibility and adaptability.

9. The ability to be patient with our personal agendas or goals when they don't go as we desire. Life is like that.

10. The ability to see others and love others as Jesus sees them and loves them. Might be the hardest skill to learn but it is why we can live in God's grace as he does it with us. People are quirky - even you and I. Jesus sees beyond our quirks and so should we.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Transformational ministries with toxic staff cultures

There is a disconnect in many ministries that claim to be about transformation. That disconnect is that their own internal staff cultures are often toxic, dysfunctional and highly untransformed. It is a sickness that pervades even high profile ministries that purport to be on the forefront of leadership and transformational ministries.

If our staff cultures are not healthy we do not have the moral ground to claim that our ministry is about transformation. There are too many places where fear and intimidation and lack of care for staff is the norm. It usually reflects the senior leader's lack of EQ or concern for those on their staff. It is often fueled by a leader's drive to succeed or their own insecurities. Whatever the cause it is inexcusable and sad. And not consistent with the kind of cultures that reflect the culture of Jesus.

Healthy staff cultures are marked by these kind of characteristics.

• All are treated with dignity
• Grace is extended in all situations - even when tough issues are being dealt with
• Truth is spoken in grace
• People are developed, empowered and valued
• Candid discussion is valued
• People are in their "lane" or sweet spot
• Men and women are treated equally
• There is a high value in helping people become all they can be
• Leaders serve their staff to help them be successful
• There is clarity of roles and people are given the tools to do their jobs
• Teamwork is highly valued
• Relationships are collegial 
• Opinions are valued
• Staff find their roles fulfilling because they understand the mission they are contributing to
• There is high trust
• Fairness is practiced in all situations
• Appreciation is regularly expressed

How does your staff culture measure up and where could you do better? Transformation starts at home, in our own ministries. As ministry leaders our commitment to transformation starts with our own staff.

See also:
Signs you work in a toxic workplace

Signs you work in a healthy workplace


All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Can we disagree with one another and still speak kindly to one another?

It bemuses me when Christians in the name of Jesus disagree with one another in highly  disagreeable ways. It is as if disagreements give license to speak to one another in the name of Jesus without the love and grace of Jesus. It is our "truth" without God's "grace." When our truth cannot be spoken in grace it should not be spoken at all. It is not a Jesus truth when communicated in ways that Jesus would not have communicated. 

When we are angry we ought to filter our response through the Fruit of the Spirit. If our response does not meet that grid we are better off waiting until it does. If our words and attitudes do not match the truth we espouse we negate the spirit of Jesus in whose name we purport to speak. Too much conflict and disagreement in Christian circles does not live up to the spirit of Jesus or for that matter the Holy Spirit who lives within us.

In the prophets it says that the Servant, (Jesus) would not break the bruised reed. Think of how easy it is to break a reed, let alone a bruised one. Yet, Jesus is so gracious that even when he needs to get our attention He does it with amazing love and gentleness. Yet we find it easy to wield a sledgehammer in His name. I suspect it makes Him deeply sad when we do.

I discount opinions and words spoken in Jesus' name without Jesus' love. Why should I trust such words when their delivery violates everything Jesus taught and modeled? And I am deeply sorry when I do the same. The older I get the more I understand that truth without the spirit of grace is hard and so unlike Jesus. I like you am susceptible to violating His loving spirit but I am determined to see alignment between the truth I share and the spirit in which I share it. 

If we disagree with one another - and we will! Let's do it in a spirit that looks like Jesus. It would change the equation in many relationships and conflicts.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Christian crusaders

Christian crusaders are not hard to find. They populate the internet with all kinds of dubious information, find a home in our churches and are the prophets that will keep the "true faith" and bring equally zealous people around them to fight the righteous fight. What is interesting about these crusaders who fight for truth is that they almost always lack grace. And when asked about that they justify their behaviors by quoting Jesus words to the Pharisees. In other words they are like Jesus and those they crusade against are Pharisees.

Which is really interesting because those they usually fight against are fellow believers and often church leaders. I have learned that engaging such crusaders is usually not very productive as they are highly inflexible and unteachable. Here are some of the signs of Christian Crusaders.

First, they are usually incredibly harsh with their vocabulary using words like sin, evil, heresy, need for repentance, God's judgement, arrogance, narcissism, and the list could go on. And, their communications are also full of Scriptural references to prove their case. In fact, the more people quote scripture in such communications the more concerned I am as those Scriptures are usually used as a hammer of "righteousness" against perceived "unrighteousness."

Second, Christian crusaders become deeply enmeshed with other crusaders against a common "cause" or "enemy" and these enmeshed relationships fuel their sense of righteousness - as there is no one who challenges the party line - and there is no glue for dysfunctional individuals like the fuel of an evil enemy. If one speaks out against the behaviors or challenges the party line they often become one of the unrighteous.

Third, Christian crusaders are usually highly inflexible. This is why conversations about the veracity of their claims and beliefs rarely have any impact. To compromise on any point is for them to compromise truth rather than to realize that the real issue may simply be that they disagree with the views of those they have demonized. I will rarely waste my time trying to convince those who will never be convinced.

Fourth, Christian crusaders take second and third hand information that is "helpful to them" and use it without regard to whether it is actually accurate. Sine it fits their skewed view of the universe it must be true. Fact verification is not high on their agenda.

Then, they view all events with those being demonized through their skewed view of reality. I have seen simple, straightforward statements interpreted in a malicious way when any reasonable individual would take the statement at face value. The lens through which crusaders see their opponents is so skewed that they cannot see any intentions as deviating from their interpretation.

Finally, crusaders don't let go. It is, after all a crusade, and until they win, there is no let up. And those caught in their sights cannot do much about it except leave it to God. In the church, this behavior should not be allowed and elected leaders ought to deal with crusaders in their midst who create problems and division. That last word is very important. Crusaders create unhealthy division and destroy the unity of the church. After all, it is a righteous struggle - which is often directly from the pit!

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

The Three most dangerous things leaders don't do

THE 3 MOST DANGEROUS THINGS LEADERS DON’T DO

From the Leadership Freak

Kingdom Entrepreneurs

What would happen if we helped Christ followers think of themselves as kingdom entrepreneurs? That is like entrepreneurs in the market place who are always looking for new opportunities. Like them we should be training those entrusted to us in the church to always be looking for new opportunities to bring Jesus into the picture with those around us.

In many ways, our emphasis on programming in the church and then the need to staff that programming has trained people to be passive in the ministry department, waiting to be invited or told about the role they should play. Not only are these opportunities often not in the sweet spot of those asked but it also centers much of the ministry inside the church rather than in the world where we are called to have major influence.

The church is the most viral organization on the face of the earth. There are believers in every corner of the world, in every social strata, in every profession (well almost on that one). If each of us, scattered across the landscape were to see ourselves as a kingdom entrepreneur placed there directly by Jesus in order to make his reputation great and his name well known who knows how much influence the church would once again have!

It also places the responsibility on those who have been given it: Each of us (Ephesians 2:10). And it challenges us to live out our calling in unique and creative ways always consistent with how God uniquely, handcrafted us for that very purpose. And there is no age limit here, young or mature. All of us can be kingdom entrepreneurs. It is also deeply consistent with the parable of the talents where each one given a sum of money by the master going on a trip was expected to find ways to multiply that sum in a creative way. 

What is the church missing today? In many cases it is people who think and act like kingdom entrepreneurs where everyone is in the game with and for Jesus.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Ten ways to create unnecessary chaos in relationships

In recent days I have had my share of brushing up against chaotic and conflictual relationships between individuals or groups. What I have seen is messy, probably unnecessary and certainly painful but it got me thinking of the many ways that we can create unnecessary and painful chaos in relationships.

One. Triangulate with others instead of going to the source. When I share my issues about another person with anyone other than that person, I have brought them into my issue and often into an alliance with me against others. When you think about that, how crazy is that! It does not solve the problem but rather enlarges the circle of those who now have problems but who cannot solve them because their problem is a problem by proxy (actually our problem) but not theirs.

Two: Copy emails about conflictual situations to those who are not involved. Of course once you do that they are now involved and often others get inadvertently roped in. Why do we copy emails to people who have not business getting them? It is usually a power play or a way to bring in others to "our side" and it certainly enlarges the circle of mistrust, doubt and information.

Three: Sharing second or third hand information. Second hand information is not usually real information. At least it is often highly suspect because no matter what if it is second hand we don't know all the facts but just some of the facts. We ought not share what we don't know about another person's experience. 

Four: Going on a crusade against another individual or group. There are people who believe that they need to solve problems that they are not in a position to solve but they go on a crusade to do so anyway. I am not talking about a "whistle blower" situation but especially in Christian circles, taking matters into our own hands to take care of situations that are more likely the purview of a church or ministry board to deal with. There are many dysfunctional situations I may know about but do nothing about because they are not my purview to solve. 

Five: Planting seeds of distrust against another by sharing gossip or even "facts" that they can do nothing about. If people need to know, the right people need to know, not the wrong people. Too often we don't discriminate on that score. 

Six; Ignoring issues that we are in a place to deal with and the responsible person. Often, leaders who are conflict adverse don't deal with issues they know are problematic and therefore allow the dysfunctions to spill over among others. This is the source of much pain in the local church when leaders choose not to confront behaviors that are problematic.

Seven: Not telling people the truth. Truth should be shared graciously and only with the right people but if we have issues we need to share those issues in the right way and at the right time. Then we need to leave those issues with those who are in a position and who have the responsibility to do something about it. What they do is not my responsibility. Being honest with them is.

Eight: Demonize those who disagree with you or who are the objects of your unhappiness. It happens all the time in Christian circles. We divide the world into good people and bad people, righteous and unrighteous. Is life that easy? and which group would we be in? In this world view we are in whatever group someone else puts us in. Life is not that easy. Good and Godly people can do and say unfortunate things but it does not make them worthy of demonization.  We ought to be happy that Jesus does not see us that way.

Nine: Taking up someone else's issue as ours. Another form of triangulation. Your issues are yours and mine are mine. I can give you counsel or take your counsel but the issues are still either yours or mine. When I take up your issue, I get involve in conflict that is not my own. I am always ready to mediate conflict but I do not want to get involved in the issues of others that I cannot solve.

Ten: Being unwilling to be a third party to solve relational difficulties. "Blessed are the peacemakers" says Jesus. What would happen if every time we heard there was conflict we offered our services to seek to resolve the conflict rather than get involved in the conflict itself. The world would be a different place.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Facts, gossip, innuendo and assumptions

There is a big difference between facts, gossip, innuendo and assumptions. The facts can be verified. The other three are hearsay and often if not usually wrong. Yet it is very easy to assume that the latter three are "facts" and many do.

I have seen a number of situations recently where there was circulation of information that was heavy on gossip, innuendo and assumptions but the facts were in short supply. Why? Because those circulating the information did not have first hand information - only what they had heard or assumptions they had made. Or, they had taken what they heard and made assumptions about motives and what the "truth" was. 

Such is the destruction of many relationships and the root of much conflict in organizations and churches. Not truth that we are sure of but rather gossip, innuendo and assumptions that "we are sure of" and feel free to share with others. Who wins? Not Jesus who is full of grace and truth but the Evil One who is the father of all lies.

Even facts can be interpreted wrongly if we assume wrong motives. All facts are suspect if we assume there is a bad agenda behind them. Again, we must be careful as to what motivation we attribute because it is very hard to judge motivations. We can make statements about behaviors but rarely about the motivations behind the behaviors.

All of us ought to be wary of information that we don't know to be true. And even then we ought to  be wary of judging the motivations behind the "facts." If we get either wrong we may well be playing into the hand of the Evil One.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Does Missions separate families?

Check out this great article on whether missions separates families and the implications of  letting our family member go for the sake of the gospel.

When board members don't get their way

One of the reasons that I believe humility is so important for those serving on a church board (and other ministry boards) is that we must be willing to allow the board to make decisions and then set aside our personal preferences and accept that decision. It is the way boards are supposed to operate but unfortunately there are often board members who refuse to give up their pet issues or put issues to rest that the board has decided. It causes frustration for other board members and can often lead to dysfunction on the board.

There are some individuals who cannot give up their issues no matter how often the board decides differently. The issues just keep coming up and the board member just keeps pushing. Such an individual does not belong on the board because they do not have the humility or flexibility to allow the board to make corporate decisions - decide issues - and move on. It is what boards do.

What drives such frustrating behavior? It can be a lack of humility. It can be a personal agenda. It can be that they are just inflexible individuals and they elevate their preferences to the only solution even when the majority disagrees. I often get push-back when I suggest one must guard the gate to church leadership. Some believe that all that matters is that someone loves Jesus. That is just foolishness! When individuals do not allow the board to operate as it should they hurt the board, the leadership and the church. I often tell congregations that they get what they deserve when they don't guard the gate.

Boards need to learn how to clarify expectations of board behavior and they need to learn how to police renegade board members. If you have someone who will not let an issue go in the face of board action, ask them to step off. They simply don't understand how boards work.

See also
Rethinking leadership selection in the church

Eight dysfunctions of church governance boards

Dumb things church boards do

Board members and their intellectual capacity

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Loud voices are not necessarily majority voices

We make a major mistake in the church when we simply assume that loud dissenting voices reflect the will of the congregation. Often they don't. In fact, in many cases, they reflect the voices of themselves and a few friend but not the congregation at large. It may seem like they do because of the noise but be very careful in your assumptions. Often it is just noise.

I have worked in a significant number of situations where churches were in crisis. That crisis was sometimes caused by the pastor or congregants. What I have learned is that what is presented at the outset is often not what I discover upon due diligence. And that the analysis given to me by strong figures in the church (pastor or lay) is often not representative of the church at large.

I am not discounting the perspective of those loud voices. Often, their perspective makes sense even when it does not reflect the will of the majority. What I am saying is that one needs to be careful not to make assumptions as to the legitimacy of the claims until one has done due diligence and can substantiate claims one way or another. That is why I think "grey" in conflictual situations until I have run my process. Grey thinking means that I am listening and observing without drawing concrete solutions until I have all the facts, not some of the facts.

One needs to listen carefully to both loud and quiet voices in any conflict situation. Often the quite voices are more prescient and accurate that the loud voices who get the most attention. What it appears on the surface is not always what is true in the end. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

If I could do it over as a young leader I would have...

If I could do it over as a young leader..

I would have been less defensive when people pushed back at me

I would have had fewer hills to die on

I would have been more flexible

I would have worked harder to stay connected to people who didn't like me

I would have lived with less anxiety

I would have been more patient in achieving our goals

I would have trusted God more and me less

I would have said "I don't know" more often

I would have cared a bit less as to what people thought of me

I would have been more comfortable just being me

I would not have tied my identity to my ministry job

I would have been more gracious and diplomatic

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

The important role of wisdom and discernment in leadership

I have met leaders in the Christian arena who are deeply political and find ways to negotiate their agenda by alliances and tactics that would make Washington proud. At the other end of the spectrum are leaders who have rejected that approach and simply believe that if they do the right thing (sans politics) that they are leading well, no matter what the consequences. 

I would like to propose a third alternative: Leading in wisdom and discernment. As was said about David in Psalm 78, "David shepherded them with integrity of heart; with skillful hands he led them." Skillful hands refers to a leadership that was rich in wisdom and discernment. 

Political leadership is maneuvering, manipulating and plotting to get one's agenda. Wisdom is about discerning how to move forward in a way that is productive while understanding the dynamics of organizational leadership and people but without manipulation or coercion. 

Wisdom and discernment does take into account potential individuals or groups who may not want to play ball or cooperate with a leader's decision or direction because that is wise. The difference is in how we seek to achieve our agenda. By manipulation and outsmarting or through discernment and wisdom as how best to proceed? It is being in the words of Jesus as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves." This can mean understanding the political agendas of others and responding appropriately without being political or manipulative ourselves.

Too many Christian leaders get outsmarted by people who have ill motives and personal agendas because we cannot believe that someone would play dirty: they are naive. That is where shrewdness comes in - understanding where others are coming from and what their agenda may be. Innocence comes in when we don't respond with the same tactics. While I don't want to stoop to unhealthy tactics I also want to be highly discerning about the actions and motives of others who can and sometimes do hurt ministry.

Wisdom and discernment require time to think and ponder key decisions that we are thinking about making. Is the timing right? How will they be received? Who is going to push back and why? What are the potential unintended consequences? Whose agreement would it be wise to have on the front end? How do we communicate the decision? And so on. In fact, as a leader I want to be one step ahead of others rather than one step back. That is discernment! And wisdom.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

What does it take to preserve congregational unity?

Congregational unity is a very precious commodity. In Ephesians 4:1-6, Paul pleads with the Ephesians to "make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace." The phrase "make every effort" is from a Greek word that is hard to translate into English because it has a strong sense of urgency to it. It is vital, important, urgent and critical in Paul's words. 

Who is responsible for church unity? Everyone: Church leaders, senior pastors and the congregation as a whole. No one is exempt and no one can expect others to make the effort if they do not. For pastors it means that we don't move too quickly and cause division in the body and that we listen carefully and respond as we can. For church leaders it means that we ensure that we are all moving in the same direction together and for everyone it means that we are willing to work together and care about one another.

In fact, Paul gives us four relational and character non-negotiables to living in unity and again it applies to pastors, congregations and leaders in Ephesians 4:1-6.

One: Humility. Pride wants our way and it splits congregations. Humility is willing to subjugate our personal preferences for the common good and the mission of the church. Whenever there is conflict in a church you can bet that there is a lack of humility and an excess of pride. I am always bemused when I say to a congregation in conflict that they have a problem with pride. The push-back is immediate and it says a lot. We don't like to hear it but when we protest too much it is probably true. 

Two: Gentleness. Harshness leads to wounds, hurt, conflict and division. It may be harsh words, harsh attitudes, harsh actions or harsh spirits - all of them contribute to division and none of them contribute to peace and unity. And harshness never expresses the way of Jesus who does not break the bruised reed and who exercises such great tenderness toward us. Is it not ironic that the Jesus we worship and follow is never harsh with us while we find it easy to be harsh toward others? Gentleness leads to peace and unity while harshness leads to conflict and disunity.

Three: Patience. Think of how patient Jesus is with us and how impatient we are with others. Critical spirits, complaints and bad attitudes are often symptoms of impatience. Grace is all about patience. Do others deserve it? We often think not. Do we deserve it? Not at all but God graciously gives it. Patience is the character of Jesus and it must become ours. Without patience with one another there cannot be unity and peace in our relationships.

Four: Bearing with one another in love. This is about being willing to look beyond the faults and deficiencies of others and see what can be and should be in their lives. It is substituting love for judgement and seeing people as those made in the image of God regardless of their faults, issues or idiosyncrasies. It is giving grace to others and loving them unconditionally.

Unity does not come easily just as the cross of Jesus that is the reason we can be united with him and with one another did not come easily. But if he was willing to give his life for us, why are we not willing to seek the unity of the Spirit with one another?  In fact, Paul starts this section with the words, "As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received." Paul was in jail for his calling. He exhorts the Ephesians and us to pay the price for the unity of the body just as he is paying the price for his calling as an apostle. 

Guard the unity of the church: As pastors; as leaders; and as congregants.

 

The top fifty countries where it's most difficult to be a Christian

Home > Archives > 2015 > January

INTERNATIONAL; RELIGIOUS FREEDOM; RESEARCH

'Not Forgotten': The Top 50 Countries Where It's Most Difficult To Be A Christian

Open Doors says 2014 saw the worst persecution of Christians in the 'modern era'—but not because of violence.

Church conflict and the need for the Holy Spirit to overshadow our own agendas.

I am working with a church in deep conflict. I have a lot of experience in such issues and have come to the conclusion that we can diagnose the problem, understand how we got here and chart a path forward but it is all worthless unless the Holy Spirit shows up and bring an end to our agendas, spiritual pride and calls us to the unity that He represents. 

The first verses in Ephesians 4 says it all: As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called to one hope when you were called; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

Seven times we see the word "one." Yet in order for oneness to reign there needs to be humility, gentleness, patience, forbearance and love. Without that there is no one. Yet that is the calling we received. 

All too often it is our pride (instead of humility), harshness (instead of gentleness), impatience (instead of patience), lack of forbearance (instead of understanding) and hatred (instead of love) that fuels disunity rather than unity. Unity is only possible when we live together in humility, gentleness, patience, forbearance and love. Yet that is the calling we have received according to Paul. When we live contrary to those characteristics we are not living out the calling of Jesus.

Church conflict makes me very sad. We want winners and losers when Jesus wants the One Spirit to reign over all of us. Every time we divide we declare that there is not one Lord (before whose cross we all knees), there is not one Spirit (who inhabits each of us) and there is not one God who ultimately reigns over us. We can divide but the Spirit unites. We can get our own way but it is at the expense of the plan of God. We can fight when the Lord brings peace.

Ultimately in church conflict, it is only the Spirit of God that can overcome our own agendas. I speak this Sunday to a very divided congregation. I cannot solve their problems. I can only point them toward the ONE who can. And it is in Unity that there will be peace. But for that to happen every knee must bow before the one Savior of all, Jesus Christ.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

The gift of connecting people to God's redemptive story

God's redemptive story from the beginning of creation to the New Creation is one of bringing redemption to sinful people that results in new life in Christ and the impact of the gospel in all of our relationships, workplaces, neighborhoods and places of influence. In other words every Christ follower becomes part of that redemptive story. The problem is that many Christians do not have a vision for how God wants to use them or the part He wants them to play in that story.

In many ways salvation has become a way to heaven (which it is) but not a grand vision of life where we are now players in God's redemptive plan (which we are) for the sake of bringing His truth and righteousness to our corner of the world (which He desires). That is sad and it diminishes the joy we can experience when we join Him in His work and story. It is the lack of that connection between our redemption and God's story that often leaves the church with little impact beyond the parking lot of our churches.

One of the greatest gifts we can give others is to help them see the amazing part God want's them to play in His story. Ordinary people who can have an extraordinary impact on those around us in often small but significant ways.

This is the message of Ephesians 2:10: "For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." God uniquely created and wired us for "good works," whatever that may be so that we could join Him in His work on this needy planet. When God's people catch a vision for what that means in their day to day lives their purpose moves from merely existing to becoming active players in God's eternal drama and plan.

Why do people not connect their lives with that grand vision more often? Perhaps we do not emphasize enough the purpose for which we are saved. Perhaps we overemphasize ministry in the church to the exclusion of living out our faith in the majority of our lives. Perhaps we don't encourage people to discover what God made them for? I don't know all the reasons but I do know there is a deficit of understanding how we all fit into God's bigger plan.

I love the genealogies in Scripture. They chronicle how people famous and infamous, ordinary and otherwise were part of God's eternal story. We are in that chain of significance. Every one of us. Let's help all believers understand that. 

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Read the first chapter of Deep Influence here for free

Deep Influence Chapter One


All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

How many and what kinds of questions do you ask?

A mark of maturity is the transition from talking to people about ourselves or giving instructions to staff and moving to asking probing questions about others and their lives and work. Questions open dialogue and conversation, show we care about others and help others clarify issues by themselves. How many and what kinds of questions we ask determines the depth of our conversations with others.

Questions about people's personal lives opens up amazing dialogues. Tell me about your spiritual Journey? How did you end up doing what you do? What are you learning these days? What is you largest challenge? Tell me about your family? How can I be praying for you?

Questions with staff indicate an interest in them, their work and their observations or opinions. It also moves us from being the one who has the answers (we often do not) to a posture of learning and genuine interest in them and their work. I would suggest that the most helpful managers and leaders are the most inquisitive and they are also the most knowledgeable because they get information that others don't get. It also takes the focus off of us and puts it on others.

Try walking through a day asking as many questions as you can and then listening. You will be amazed at what you learn and how open people are. It works with strangers and friends, colleagues and staff. I know, I learned from the best over the years.

In terms of helping others think reflectively on their own lives, questions are especially powerful. The best questions cause others to think and reflect on issues that they may not have considered before. Thus it becomes a great tool in the personal or professional growth of others.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Great article from the Gospel Coalition

CONGREGATIONS HAVE 

WISH-DREAMS TOO

Without this trait we are not qualified to lead

Leaders expect those they lead to respect authority - theirs. Unless we as leaders also respect the authority above us we are are not qualified to lead. In fact one of the things I always look at when considering someone for a leadership position is whether they have respected the authority above them in the past. If they have been cynical toward leadership, disrespectful or simply acted autonomously, I will not move them into leadership. If we cannot follow well we cannot lead well and don't have the moral authority to do so.

I am troubled by senior pastors or ministry leaders who do not respect the authority of their board. There is a temptation when leading at that level to think that the board is a distraction or a necessary evil. The truth is that boards are there for our protection and the protection of the ministry and constitute our authority. 

Respecting authority is not blind followership. If I respect the authority above me I will be candid with them, push back on things that I believe may be detrimental to the organization or are poor decisions and expect that I will be treated with honor and dignity. If that is not possible I personally will look for another place to serve. However, in the end, unless there is a moral or ethical issue at stake I will do as I am asked. As one who asks respect from others I must give it myself.

There is another aspect to respecting authority and that is being accountable for our time, energy and plans. I do not want to be "managed" or especially micro managed. However, part of being accountable to authority is being clear about what we plan to accomplish and then being accountable for our performance. 

This is why in our organization all staff members have Key Result Areas and Annual Ministry Plans. They are agreed to by their supervisor before the year starts and they are a part of the review at the end of the year. I also make my calendar available to my supervisor and to my senior staff. Accountability is being transparent about how we spend our time.

There is a real difference in the leadership of those who respect their authority and those who don't. Leaders first must follow.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Why are the Pentecostals growing in numbers - from Ed Stetzer

Why Are Pentecostals 

Growing in Number?

Neighbors from Hell

Yes, that was the title of the 20/20 episode I watched tonight. It was amazing to see the petty battles and lengths people can go to in their conflict over seemingly insignificant things. And that people who live in close proximity to one another cannot simply get along. It was funny, sad and crazy all at once.

It caused me to think about some of the conflicts in the local church where the Holy Spirit is actually present but where the same petty conflicts easily become full blown battles. Sadly, many of the behaviors, assumptions about one another and tactics are not much different from the "Neighbors from Hell." Except that we are really called to be "Neighbors headed to Heaven" where we will spend eternity together. 

In the 20/20 episode it was clear that battles among neighbors were all consuming - energy wise and emotionally. Fences were built, cameras installed to watch the actions of the others and all kinds of nasty things done and said to one another. 

Such is true in conflict in the local church as well and as such it is often literally from hell because the Evil One is greatly satisfied when we are fighting one another rather than focused on taking territory for Jesus. The irony in the local church is that our "neighbors from hell" are going to be our "brothers and sister in heaven" one day. Does it not make sense that we would practice on earth what will be true in heaven? - especially as we pray "Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven." Something to think about.

The saddest thing about the episodes? It was so unnecessary. And so is most conflict in the local church. It robs us of our ability to accomplish what God has called us to do, it diminishes the reputation of Jesus and it is life taking rather than life giving (John 10:10). There are certainly things worth fighting for. Most church conflict does not fit that category. It is a distraction of the evil one from the mission of Jesus for the church.

All of T.J. Addington's books are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.