The key to next year's success is right now!

You may not have thought of this but your success in the coming year will largely be determined by what you do prior to 2012. We start each new year with high hopes and a clean slate but forget that it is the work we do before the start that determines whether or not our hopes are realized. This is true in both our personal and professional lives.


Here are two simple questions that if answered well and acted on will change the nature of the upcoming year:


-What are the one to three things that if I paid attention to in my personal life would help me take a significant leap in my walk with God and my relationships. What is my plan to be intentional in those few areas?


-What are the two or three big rocks that if I paid attention to in my work life would help me take a significant leap in my professional impact. What is my plan to be intentional in those few areas?


Remember that it is not in all the little things that we see the greatest results but in concentrating on a few major things (less is more) that merit our full attention. But clarity on those few things before the new year begins is the key to seeing the results we want to see. Waiting until the year starts will likely mean that we will simply continue in what we have been doing in the past.


If we always do what we always did we always get what we always got! Want to get something new? Plan now!

Building healthy ministry cultures

Leaders often do not often think of themselves as culture creators but that is exactly what they are. Whether intentionally or unintentionally we create a culture for our organization through our commitments, actions and words. In fact, every interaction we have with others, individually or corporately, contributes over time to a specific culture that the ministry absorbs and makes its own for better or worse. This is why dysfunctional leaders create dysfunctional organizations and healthy leaders healthy organizations.


The reason leaders are culture creators is that others in the organization take their cues from their leader as to what is acceptable or unacceptable in the organization. For instance, leaders who are lax on keeping their commitments and following through send a message that execution is not a high priority. On the other hand, leaders who are disciplined and focused send a very different message. Intuitively, the organization reads their leader(s) and the organization takes on the MO of the leader. 


Good leaders are intentional about defining the culture they desire for the organization and ensuring that their actions and words reflect those core convictions. In other words, they carefully craft a culture that over time becomes the culture of the group. It is intentionally rather than accidentally created.


I just checked out of an amazing hotel in Saigon. Over the past three days I had interactions with dozens of hotel staff and to a person they were attentive, cordial and wonderfully helpful. The fact that there were no exceptions sent a strong message about their culture of service and hospitality. It is the culture of this hotel created by its leaders. 


Organizational culture is powerful because it defines the ethos of the group. That ethos defines the health of the group and is a major factor in the satisfaction of staff and the quality of new staff the organization attracts. The healthier the organizational culture the better the staff it will attract and retain. The opposite is also true.


As I think about the ethos we are seeking to intentionally create in ReachGlobal I would define it with these markers. As you read these, think about the list you would have for your ministry and consider writing them down and ensuring that you are focused on making them the ethos of your organization.


-Collegial and collaborative
-Highly focused with an emphasis on results
-Disciplined in execution
-Entrepreneurial in spirit
-Attentive to and empowered by the Holy Spirit
-Great attention to the health of individuals, teams and leaders
-Leveraged for the best results
-Empowered staff
-Kingdom focused
-A culture of grace with a commitment to accountability

TED talk at the Mission Exchange on critical shifts that need to take place in the mission world today

Recently, I had the opportunity to talk to US based mission leaders on the critical shifts that must take place in the mission world today.

You can access both my talk as well as others here.

The world has changed and mission agencies must change if they are going to survive and thrive in the globalized color world.

What is your street corner?

What is your street corner?


That is the question one church in Grand Rapids asks each of its people. They are intentionally downplaying what happens at the church except on Sundays and raising the level of awareness of each one's responsibility to develop relationships with people who are in their circle of acquaintances - their street corner.


It can be our neighborhood, our colleagues at work, our work out buddies, study group, book reading club - whoever we have relationships and favor with is our street corner. And the question is, what are we intentionally doing to develop relationships and share what Jesus has done in our lives on our street corner. It is a simple and powerful metaphor. 


Mary Ann and I were thinking last night of all the people who we have had meaningful relationships with in our neighborhood over the past 23 years. It has been a significant street corner for us, as has been her work in years past at a local high school. We also have a street corner at our favorite restaurant where we know almost all the wait staff and personnel. 


Really it is a matter of opening our eyes to those God has put in our circle of friends, being intentional about those friendships, praying for them regularly and looking for opportunities to share. The number of street corners in your church is the number of people you have, a lot of them. Are they hanging out on their street corners?

What I watch for in leaders

I have a shortlist of things that I watch for in leaders that influences my view of their leadership health. Here they are in no particular order.


How do they treat people below them? Leaders are usually very good at appropriate relationships at their level or above in the leadership chain. The question is whether they treat those below with the same honor, dignity and care. Leaders fail the test when they treat those below differently than they treat those above. 


Are they consistent in their actions and do their actions reflect their stated beliefs? What leaders say is far less important than what they do. People watch actions far more than they listen to words because words are cheap while actions are powerful. Words that are consistent with actions are very powerful. Team members then know \their leader is serious.


Do they build strong teams or are they the linchpin of the ministry? Teams send a message that the ministry is about what we can do together while strong leaders without strong teams sends a message that what we can do is about the leader. Leaders who build strong teams value the contribution of others while leaders who don't, don't.


Do they display a humility in their leadership that invites dialogue, disagreement and push-back or are they insular and defensive? The first indicates personal health while the second indicates dishealth and a focus on self along with insecurity.


Do they ask questions of others and listen carefully or do they talk a lot and expect others to listen? The more a leader talks rather than listens the less healthy and effective they are. The best leaders ask many questions, listen carefully and think deeply about what they hear.


Are they collaborative in their leadership decisions or do they have a need to get their own way? Collaborative leadership indicates a desire to draw out the best from others toward shared solutions while non-collaborative decision making devalues the opinions of others and elevates the opinions of the leader.


Do they clearly articulate the mission of the organization or do they have trouble explaining the focus of their ministry? If I ask staff members do I hear a the same message I heard from the leader? 


Do they live life intentionally or accidentally? This goes to the question of how carefully they think through their priorities. Leaders with high intentionality are thoughtful leaders who know what is important for them to pay attention to. That differs from leaders who are easily distracted, follow the flavor of the month and seem to be random as to what they pay attention to making it very difficult for their staff to know what is truly important.


Many people lead. Not many are truly good leaders. These are the kinds of things my "leadership radar" tunes into

It is really a very bad idea

OK, blogs are meant to cause people to think and some will not respond positively to this one - but, if it causes people to think, then I will be good.


On a regular basis I hear from pastors or others that they have a wonderful thing going by paying pastors in some majority world country where they can support a pastor for maybe $150.00 per month. I usually don't share my opinion because I am not being asked for it. But if I was asked this is what I would say. "It is really a very bad idea." There are huge unintended consequences to this practice.


Let me clarify that I am not talking about supporting indigenous missionaries or those involved in training. I am talking about supporting indigenous pastors.


Why is it a really bad idea? First, it kills (yes kills) the reproducibility of the church. The church was designed to reproduce itself in any economic or political situation but once you start paying pastors from the outside this becomes the expectation and other churches are not started until there is money to pay them as well. In addition, you start funding people who are more interested in the job and steady income than have a passion for the gospel. What sounds like a small amount of money to us if often a huge amount of money to others. And, the moment a pastor is motivated more by the dollars than by the gospel you have killed authentic ministry. 


As an aside, people should know that there are denominations who will entice pastors to join their group by paying them - essentially purchasing churches for their denomination so that they can claim higher numbers to their constituency back home. As for pastors in our networks I say, "if they are willing to jump ship for money, they don't belong with us in the first place." The people who are my heroes are those pastors who are driven by a heart passion for ministry and would be doing it whether they got paid for it or not. And there are millions of those kinds of workers around the globe. Many of them are bi-vocational, earning a living and pastoring a church.


As a further aside, there are many third world pastors who have learned to play the game and are being supported by numerous individuals each thinking they are the only ones sending needed money. Trust me, it is true. Money has a seductive and corrupting influence in ministry as well as in politics and business. In the end, we feel good because we wrote the check, they feel good because they get the check but the gospel itself does not win and is indeed compromised by money.


Second, when you pay a pastor from the outside, you rob the people of their joy, responsibility and privilege of supporting their church. We have unintentionally trained congregations that they have no responsibility to give since the money flows from somewhere else. With the amazing emphasis in Scripture on giving as part of discipleship, it is a sin to rob congregations of their responsibility to give. In contexts where there is even no cash they can give - eggs, chickens, produce - and many do. This is how thousands of pastors are supported in places like Congo where cash is often non-existent. 


Third, and I am going to quote a leader in a third world country. When you pay a pastor from the outside, "you neuter him and make him dependent on you." He is beholden to others, he is not ultimately accountable to his congregation (they don't provide for him) and we have created a dependency model - which does not make for dignity either for the congregation or the pastor. In our experience, where we have paid pastors, the church has not reproduced, leaders have been weak and relatively ineffective and the passion for the gospel is weakened.


There are two things we can do to help majority world pastors who are in need. First, we can help them teach their congregations about giving - a foreign concept to new believers everywhere. Second, we can help with micro enterprise where they can earn a living without losing their dignity or becoming dependent on others. This is a one time investment rather than an ongoing investment.


There are many, many ways that we can and should be investing in ministry around the world. We spend way too much on ourselves in the west and way to little on helping the majority world. But, we are often naive in how we go about helping those who need help. And we do not often enough think about the unintended consequences of our "help." Before you write a check to support a pastor in the majority world, stop and think of the unintended consequences.

Ministry Excellence: More ministry for less money

All indications seem to point to a fundamental economic shift taking place in our country, and indeed globally. This shift may well impact the amount of money that is available for ministry and the days of year over year automatic increases may be coming to an end. This is not necessarily a bad thing in that it forces ministries to think carefully about how they use the resources they have and to look at ways to leverage what may be fewer and more precious dollars.

The foundation of ministry has always been people first and money second, although we all acknowledge that funding is important and necessary. The question is whether there are ways of doing what we do without the kinds of increases we have been used to in the past. While this issue is on the horizon for the ministry world it has been the reality in the business world for some time.

Finding ways to do more with less is known as "lean manufacturing," or "lean management" in the for profit sector. For instance, I know of one firm that was able to drive a very significant amount of overhead from its annual costs, decrease the inventory in its warehouses, speed up delivery of its product and drastically decrease inventory damage all of which went to the bottom line. And this was a very well run company. Yet, by thinking differently and doing some things differently it decreased its staff, integrated its processes and saved very significant dollars which in an upside down economy not only allowed them to survive but to thrive.

I believe that the same kind of thinking would not only benefit ministries but may become a non-negotiable in the new economy that is emerging. In ReachGlobal, for instance, we have been working with a consultant from the lean management sector to help us in a host of ways from more efficient meetings, to better planning and evaluation tools, scalable processes, eliminating duplicate systems, time wasters and breaking down divisional silos that prevent efficient and effective operations and decisions. In fact, we will not hire new support staff until we have rigorously determined that there are not other efficiencies that can be found. We call this effort ministry excellence and it is paying significant dividends. It is all about being the best we can be and using the people and dollars we have to their best advantage.

I sometimes hear people say, "we should not run a ministry like a business." Yes, a ministry is different than a business in its mission and end result but I believe that God would desire us to honor Him in our stewardship of people and resources. Perhaps the right answer is that ministries should be run better than many businesses because unlike the quarterly dividends of many corporations, our stakes are eternal. We all work with limited resources but God is able to provide what we actually need as opposed to what we usually want. It may be that He would entrust more to us as we are prudent and careful with what He so generously provides.

It would seem that the marketplace with its lean manufacturing and management has some things to teach ministries. Ministry excellence is a way to see more ministry with less money through creative and disciplined management of our resources.

Changing antiquated local church mission strategies

Mission agencies are moving toward a model of missions that fits the globalized and color world in which we live. These include major shifts in how they approach missions work both to meet the needs of a new day as well as to leverage their people and monetary investment. With a world rapidly approaching seven billion souls, how we approach the great commission is more important than ever before.


Many congregations are also reassessing their missions strategy – a good thing. However, many congregations are still locked into strategies that were forged in the pre-globalized, black and white world setting. This includes supporting a list of missionaries without much strategic involvement in what they do, supporting personnel that they would not consider qualified to work in their own church, and spending mission dollars in isolation from the ministry priorities of the rest of the budget. Congregations ought to approach their missions investment with the same care and analysis as they do the rest of their budget so that like healthy mission agencies, they are leveraging their investment for the greatest global impact. Given that the typical missions budget of a church ranges from ten to twenty five percent, the aggregate of those funds across evangelical churches is huge indeed. Yet many of our strategies creak along as they have for the past fifty years oblivious to the change that has taken place around us.In prior blogs I have addressed some of these issues:


When money hurts mission efforts

Western vs. indigenous missionaries

Determining what missionaries to support

Do it alone or do it together

Missions today is about....

When thinking about a missions paradigm for your church I believe there are some key questions that need to be answered.

One: Do we have a grocery list approach to missions or do we have a well defined strategic approach that makes sense? Just as one focuses ministry in other areas of church life, focused missions is far more effective than a shotgun approach. You cannot do everything but you can do some things very well. Are you focused or unfocused?

Two: Do you truly screen those you choose to support or is it more a relational thing where you support missionaries based on their relationships with someone in the church? Your support dollars are like salary dollars. You choose carefully who you will pay a salary to and one should likewise choose carefully who one supports so that your investment is a wise one. See the blog above for further comments. Not all missionaries are equally qualified.

Three: Is your missions strategy one where it is possible for your church to participate hands on either in short term trips and projects or in a way which galvanizes your entire congregation? When mission is just about sending money, people today disengage. When they can participate, they engage significantly and pray.

Four: Is your missions strategy one that leverages your mission dollars for significant results? I am not talking about how many conversions your missionaries see as that depends on the soil they are working with. But do they and the organization they work for have a definable, workable and intentional plan to see the gospel penetrate the area in which they are working? Not all strategies are equally strategic.

Five: Is your missions strategy balanced? I suggest that churches think about mission in for categories: One; supporting a church planting effort that will reach an entire city or region. Two; engaging in biblical compassion that shares the gospel and raises the dignity of people. Three; coming alongside an indigenous movement leader and helping him/her expand their church planting and holistic ministry efforts and four; making sure that the unique DNA that God has put in your church is integrated into all these efforts so that your church increases its unique influence.

Don't allow your mission budget and strategy to live in a world all on its own. Integrate it into the overall ministry strategy of your church and work to be as strategic in missions as you are in other areas of ministry.

Transparency in leadership

Leaders are often reluctant to be candid about their own struggles and their shadow side, thinking that those they lead will think less of them for revealing their own mistakes and failures. Ironically, if you ask those they lead if they think less of them or more of them for doing so the answer is invariably "more!"

Why? first because those we lead know we are not without our own struggles and in fact, they have probably experienced our shadow side from time to time. Second, our transparency is a sign of something that those we lead value highly: authenticity. To pretend we don't have similar struggles to others is inauthentic and to allow others to put us on a pedestal is dangerous because the pedestal will fall. What people want in a leader is authentic character without pretence. Pretence is a lie and it reveals lack of integrity.

Third, our transparency invites those we lead to join us on a journey toward greater wholeness, maturity and personal growth. I cannot challenge others to grow if there is not evidence of growth in my own life. The first step in growth is acknowledging the need and it is authentic, transparent, humble individuals who acknowledge their need. Pride does not acknowledge need for growth either to ourselves or to others. And it is deadly to ministry organizations where humility is a prerequisite for true service. Humble, transparent leaders grow humble, transparent teams.

The ability to be transparent comes out of true introspection regarding our own lives - the good and bad - and an attitude that we have nothing to prove to others and nothing to lose by being honest. What we fear we will lose (respect) is ironically what we gain. More importantly, however, we grow a team that does not live with pretence but with authenticity. When leaders choose to be authentic others will. When leaders choose pretence, others do the same.

None of us can relate to perfect people since that is not the reality we live with. Thus if leaders want those they lead to relate to them they will choose transparency over pretence. I love the advice Paul gave to Timothy in 1 Timothy 4:15 - "Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress." The greatest example we can be to others is that they can see the progress of growth in our own lives.

The Privilege of Persecution

I spoke yesterday to a group of church leaders and pastors from across India on the subject of ministering from a posture of weakness (my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness) from 2 Corinthians 12:7-10. At the conclusion I asked for their response and heard some amazing stories of persecution, suffering and God's intervention. These men and women of faith understand what it means to minister from weakness and to share in the sufferings of Christ.

In one instance a church planter told about being surrounded by radical Hindu's on a road where he was travelling by bicycle. He had on him a Bible and some tracts. The men asked him what he was carrying and he told them, "I have the gospel of Jesus for you." They told him they were going to kill him and he said, "Before your do so, you need to know which God I am serving," and handed them a tract. His comment - coming with the lack of fear that they expected scared them and they quickly backed off and left him alone. The pastor said, "They were scared and I was calm." God was obviously with him.

The church in the west knows virtually nothing about the privilege of sharing in the suffering of Christ because of our faith but we ought to be praying for those who experience it day in and day out. These men and women are my heroes. They have nothing to gain by what they do and everything to lose but they live day to day trusting God for their very food and protection. And He shows himself to be faithful in small and large ways.

Recently I wrote an endorsement for a new book entitled, The Privilege of Persecution. It is a must read for those in missions, for mission supporters and for those who care about the global church. It opens our eyes to the realities of serving God in most places on the planet where persecution is a reality but it is a book of hope as one reads stories like the one above of men and women who not only endure suffering for the cause of Christ but count it a privilege. Do we?

Top ten read blogs on church boards

1. Signs of a dysfunctional church board

2. When my church board is not healthy

3. Church Board Development

4. Every congregation is one leadership board away from trouble and decline

5. Your church board is unhealthy but you are not on it and don't know what to do about it

6. Church board best practices

7. Split boards, split congregations

8. Church boards and church culture

9. Conflict and problem avoidance create sick churches

10. What boards and pastors need to know about each other

Hearts of compassion

Whenever I travel in the majority world I ask to be taken to the poorest section in town. Here in Ahmedabad, India I don't need to ask - just look out the window of my four star hotel in two directions and I see how half of the population of this city lives. It is a graphic reminder of the privilege we have of decent shelter, good food, clean water and bathrooms - none of which are present in these slums.

Virtually the only groups who bring hope to such populations are Christians who share out of the little they have with those who have less. One couple I met yesterday illustrates that commitment. He is a church planter among the poor. She is a PhD in the subject of the empowerment of poor tribal women in India and both have passed up what would be lucrative jobs with their education to work among the least of these: he planting churches and she running a school for tribal children who would otherwise have no education. When I asked them what brought them the greatest joy they smiled and said, "when someone responds to the gospel."

Travel in the majority (poor) world raises serious questions for those of us who live with great wealth in comparison. Consider the fact that 54% of our world lives on less than three USD per day and 91% lives on less than 10,000 USD per year. If one has a combined family income of $100,000 per year or more we are in the top one half of one percent of wealth in the world. A startling statistic for those of us who don't consider ourselves wealthy. Yet a glance out of my dirty hotel window tells me that I am very wealthy indeed.

The question this raises for me is the portion of my giving that ought to go toward the worlds poor. Not in creating welfare like dependencies but in supporting Christian ministries that seek to both share the gospel and help those caught in a cycle of poverty. The school run by my friends mentioned above gives children an opportunity through education to get out of the poverty that has been the plight of their families for generations. And, to find hope in Jesus Christ as they are given a truly Christian education. As their lives change, parents start to ask why and they too are introduced to the gospel.

Having travelled in fifty plus countries and seen the world for what it is and having been exposed to countless heroes of Jesus who work in difficult circumstances, my goal is to see at least 25% of my giving targeted for Biblical compassion - where the gospel is shared, dignity is restored, and people have an opportunity to be lifted out of their poverty. Yes, the poor will always be among us but like Jesus who gave great attention to the poor, our hearts should break at the circumstances that so many find themselves in.

We think nothing of spending millions of dollars on our church facilities with all the excellence and technology we can cram in. All wonderful. But do we have the same commitment to those who have literally nothing and where $50,000 is like a million in what it can do? This not about guilt for what God has given. Rather it is about having the heart of God with those who have almost nothing.

Have you thought about strategically targeting a percentage of your giving toward Biblical compassion? The difference it will make is huge and eternal.

Ten marks of ego driven leaders

In an ironic twist from the humble and servant leadership of Christ there are many in Christian leadership in the church and elsewhere (lay and professional) who are driven more by ego and personal success than by a desire to see the Gospel advanced. The Gospel becomes the means by which personal success is achieved rather than the Gospel being the primary objective of their leadership. As a psychologist lamented to me recently, "Why are there so many ego driven and narcissistic leaders in Christian ministry?"

What are the signs of ego driven ministry?

First, it is obvious to those around ego driven leaders that it is about "them" and that the relentless drive for better and bigger is about their leader's success rather than the accomplishment of the mission or serving their team.

Second, ego driven leaders often drive their staff rather than serving and growing their staff as they are the means to their success. When staff feel used, it is a sign that this is about the leader rather than about the mission.

Third, ego driven leaders take credit for success and blame others for failure. They may not do this overtly (that would not look good) but they find ways to inflate their own effectiveness and deflect responsibility for failures.

Fourth, ego driven leaders often exaggerate the actual results of their ministries. Any time the stated results don't match the actual results there is eqo inflation going on. This is ubiquitous in missions!

Fifth, ego driven leaders don't empower their staff but rather control them. After all, it is about them and they want to ensure that it stays about them. Empowerment means giving responsibility, authority and therefore credit for results away.

Sixth, ego driven leaders don't often cooperate with other ministries. If it is not their idea it is not worthy of pursuing. They guard the ability to say "we did this," or "this was our idea."

Seventh, ego driven leaders are highly territorial. There is competition with other ministries as if there were a limited amount of gospel results to be had. Further, they actually believe that they have a corner on the market of how they do what they do.

Eighth, the actions and attitudes of ego driven leaders often do not match their spiritual language. Outsiders may not know the gap but insiders are well aware and the gap breeds cynicism.

Ninth, ego driven leaders give little attention to the contributions of other people to the cause of the kingdom. Their attention, focus and energy is all focused on themselves and their ministry. When talking about other ministries they often find subtle ways to denigrate the strategy and results of others. The putting down of others allows them to inflate themselves.

Tenth, ego driven leaders are not open to criticism, dialogue or feedback regarding their own behavior or leadership. Because it is about them they are not open to the feedback of others if is deemed critical. There is a high defensive mechanism. This means that strong leaders around them do not last long because their input is not welcome. Those who will cater to their egos, however, are always welcome.

My advice for those who work for ego driven leaders? Consider finding another leader to work for whose true focus is the advancement of the kingdom rather than the advancement of themselves and their ego's. Why? because using the gospel as the advancement mechanism for ourselves is anathema to everything Jesus taught about leadership in His kingdom. It is never about us. It is always about Him. Something for every leader to think about.

Truth and Lies

"When does a lie begin?
     A lie, Rabbi Fajner would say, has no beginning. A lie runs downwards like a rootlet, branching an infinite number of times. But if you trace the rootlets down, you never find a moment of inspiration and vision, only overwhelming desperation and despair.
     A lie always begins with denial.
     Something has happened - yet you do not want to admit that it has.
     That is how a lie begins."
          From The Emperor of lies: A Novel

How true! and as we all know, how destructive. There is something pure and liberating and freeing in the truth while lies begin in desperation and despair and lead to great pain. No wonder truthfulness is part of God's character (and fullness of life) while lies are part of Satan's character and the diminishing of life (John 10:10). As Rabbi Fajner said, "If you trace the rootlets down, you never find a moment of inspiration and vision, only overwhelming desperation and despair.

Lies are sinful remnants of our lower nature that can be traced back to the "father of lies." They are destructive because they not only start us on a trial of lies (one lie births another and another and another by necessity) but in their telling we lose something precious in us (integrity which is based in truth) and when exposed something precious with others (trust which is based in truth). Our own inner cohesiveness, health and personal integrity are based on truth which is why those who live with lies live with inner turmoil and fractured hearts. Why do lies make us feel soiled? Because they are so antithetical to the character of God and they violate the dim reflection we still have of being made in his image.

A reading of Proverbs highlights how central truth is to the character of God. The more truth we speak to ourselves about who we are, what motives drive us, where our sinful tendencies lie and where our lives need reformation, the more like God we become. Speaking truth to ourselves is the precursor to speaking truth to others and those who lie to others have first lied to themselves. Where do lies start? They start in the heart by lying to ourselves.

Lies never start well because they start in the heart and they never end well because when our heart is revealed our integrity is gone. Even hidden they cause inner destruction because lying to ourselves and others erodes our inner lives. We know we have violated truth and nurturing that violation eats away at our soul. Truth wins in every way. Truth telling to ourselves and others brings us closer to God the father of truth. Telling lies to ourselves or others separates us from the father of truth and mirrors the father of lies.

The Lens through which we view life

It is fascinating to watch the lenses through which individuals see life. Some see the cup half full, others half empty. Some are by nature pessimists and some optimists. There are those who approach relationships with trust while others mistrust. When colleagues do something unhelpful, there are those who instantly assume ill motives and those who don't. These reactions are a reflection of our personality, our family of origin and experiences of life. All of us have a set of lenses that filter our view of life, people and situations and none of us has perfect vision but some have better vision than others. And, all of us can grow toward clearer and healthier lenses.

Part of our Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is understanding the default reactions we have to people and situations and to work on modifying or managing that default when we know it is not helpful or accurate. It is not unusual, for instance, when someone does something that irritates us to assume they had an ill motives in their actions. That default reaction is often incorrect and learning to withhold judgement until we understand why they did what they did is healthier EQ than drawing conclusions without the full information.

Think of how often married couples make assumptions about words or actions of their spouse that are not accurate but which cause friction or conflict because of assumptions we make. I plead guilty! Often our default reactions are faulty.

Our default reactions are particularly evident when we are under stress which brings out either the best or worst in us. How often we wish we could modify some of those reactions! Understanding what our default reactions are and what pushes our buttons toward those reactions that are unhelpful allows us to be aware and modify those reactions in the future.

Healthy individuals learn to be self aware of their default assumptions and reactions and to modify the unhealthy words, emotions and behaviors that those default reactions trigger. It is high self awareness coupled with the self discipline to respond more slowly, thoughtfully and wisely in those situations where we know we are at risk of responding poorly. I have learned for instance that keeping my emotions in check when someone pushes my buttons also keeps my responses in check but it has had to be learned and practiced.

Becoming aware of the lenses which we wear and the default reactions we have to people and situations gives us the opportunity to modify our attitudes and behaviors that are problematic. It is all about EQ - and personal growth.

Subversive Spirituality

There is a dark side to spirituality especially among Christian leaders. It is a form of spirituality that is actually subversive to our walk with God and is often the cause of the undoing of leaders. To those around us it can look impressive, sacrificial and spiritual but all the while it is robbing us of the very spiritual nurture that we need to feed our souls.

Recently I had lunch with a former leader whose life had come undone in a major way. He literally crashed and burned and in the process lost his job, his marriage and for a long time his way in life. Today he is deeply reflective about how he got to where he was and it revolves around a subversive spirituality that fooled him, others and was the cause of his undoing.

Like many evangelicals he had a performance based relationship with Christ which caused him to throw himself into his ministry leadership role in a subconscious effort to win God's approval - and probably the approval of others. Like many, he had a lot to prove by being successful. In the process he started to neglect his inner life, margin and he discovered too late, his marriage. In the name of ministry and serving Christ he kept running faster and faster, until life simply unravelled. He went from running a world wide ministry to bagging groceries at a local supermarket.

I asked him what he had learned through the process. He told me that he understands now that his identity cannot be found in his ministry but in Christ alone. He now has a rhythm of life where once a month he spends a day alone with God in a spiritual retreat. He has become deeply introspective regarding his life and walk with God and has surrounded himself with other men who challenge him and provide mutual accountability. Over the past several years he has focused on making his relationship with God central and ensuring that he has the margin to do so.

My observation is that subversive spirituality - a form of spirituality that looks good but is in fact detrimental and even toxic infects many Christian leaders and is a threat to us all. At its core is the pattern of working hard in ministry to the detriment of our inner life. Doing things for God at the cost of being with God. Overloading our schedules at the cost of time for thinking, introspection, and time with the Father. Believing subconsciously that God's favor is dependent on how well we serve Him when what He first and really wants is us. Allowing our identity to be in our ministry or position rather than in our sonship as a family member of His family. All of these are dangerous, toxic and subversive substitutes for the most important: a healthy relationship with God, with family and with others. Our "importance" and public ministry fool us into thinking that all is well and our schedules mask the emptiness of our personal walk with God.

How do we prevent a subversive spirituality from fooling us? I have several suggestions.

• Regardless of our job we should not be fooled into thinking that we are indispensable. We are not! We are far less important than we think we are.
• Constantly remind ourselves that our identity is not in our ministry position but in our relationship with Christ.
• Ensure that there is margin in our lives for family, friends and God.
• Surround ourselves with some healthy people who will tell us the truth and provide accountability through relationship.
• Don't fool ourselves that our insane schedules are somehow proof of our importance or spirituality. Sometimes they are just proof of our foolishness and inner need to prove something to ourselves or others. Running fast can be a way of coping with what we know is an inner deficit.
• Develop a deeply introspective nature that probes our own motivations, sin, shadow side and schedules to ensure that we don't believe the lies of a subversive spirituality.
• Slow down. It is in the silence that we face our true selves, hear the voice of God and realign our thinking.

The amazing power of focus

What makes the difference between two equally gifted individuals, one of whom sees significant results from their work (and life in general) while the other does not? Often the answer is simple but profound: The productive individual has far greater focus to what they do in life while the less productive individuals energies are diffused by the lack of focus.

Focus is all about understanding what is important to us today, this week, this month or this year and then organizing our time and energies around what is important rather than being distracted by the less important. It is the discipline of prioritizing the most important things we need to accomplish from all the things we could give our attention to and then having the discipline to schedule those priorities first. That means we say yes to a few important things and no to many less important things. 

My guess is that we would all agree with the above definition of focus. Why, then is focus so difficult - we all struggle with keeping focused. The answer I think is pretty simple. First because it takes more intentionality and discipline to be focused than it does to live with lack of focus. Second, there are always pressures from those around us who have agendas for our lives, and third, it is simply harder to focus than it is to allow ourselves to be distracted by the good at the expense of the best. 

So why bother? Many don't! But those who do simply accomplish more than those who don't. They live with greater satisfaction knowing that they are doing what really counts and their focus spills over to family, ministry and all that is really important in life. This is not about working harder, it is about working smarter and in doing so we actually end up with more time for non work activities.

We have one life to live and we ought to live it well. God has given us specific gifts and we ought to steward those gifts. Jesus did not live accidentally but intentionally and so should we. Our greatest joy comes when we live out God's call on our lives but like all other things that takes focus and intentionality. The more focused we are the better we are in all areas of life: our work, our marriage, our ministry, and our personal walk. Focus is powerful.

Steve Jobs and our personal legacies

The news of Steve Jobs death at a young age causes all of us to think about our own mortality and the legacy we will leave. His legacy is amazing! Few people have changed the way so many people do life. My music comes from I Tunes, my reading today is largely on the I Pad, and my I Phone goes wherever I go. Steve was a creative force second to none. And he handled his illness with great dignity.

One of my passions is that all of God's people would realize that they too can leave a great and lasting legacy, one more significant than Steve Jobs because unlike technology (which I love) that will not transcend this world, our legacy can last for all eternity. It is found in the lives we touch, those we introduce to Jesus, and the ripples of spiritual influence that will go on and on from us till the time when Jesus returns. Every time a life is changed by Jesus, an eternal legacy is born.

One of the reasons I am passionate about missions is that I know that through my investment in sharing the Gospel globally I will leave behind a lasting and eternal legacy that touches many nations. There will be little notice when I leave this life, unlike Steve Jobs but I will spend eternity with the joy that many are there because of my commitment to sharing God's Good News in this life. And every one of us can share in that legacy.

We underestimate the impact that our lives have when we simply ripple on those in our circle of influence for Jesus. We will be surprised when we meet Jesus and He says "Well done, good and faithful servant" and we realize that our seemingly normal and inconsequential lives (from a fame standpoint) had an amazing eternal impact. We will realize that acts of kindness and ministry and love that we live out as a normal part of our everyday lives had a cumulative effect for Jesus that we had never imagined.

Never underestimate the legacy you will leave. If our lives are lived faithfully with a focus on pleasing our Lord, it will be greater than you could ever imagine. And it will last for eternity. Because of Jesus, our legacies can transcend even that of amazing people like Steve Jobs.

One intentional act of kindness in Jesus name

What would happen if we challenged our congregations to engage in one act of kindness in Jesus' name every week? Just one intentional act toward a friend, neighbor, co-worker or even stranger they come across? One act of kindness where we go out of our way to extend grace, help, give a kind word, pray with them, write a note of encouragement, walk across the street to engage a neighbor in conversation,  provide a needed meal or meet a need. One intentional act of kindness in Jesus' name.

It sounds inconsequential but we can wrap our heads around one intentional act of kindness a week - where we go out of our way to meet a need. And, we start looking for that opportunity and who knows, maybe a mindset would set in that we could even do this more often. Multiply that one intentional act by 52 weeeks and the number of folks in our congregation and all of a sudden one has critical mass.

Our lives are busy and our weeks are often packed with more activities than we can stuff into them. Committing to just one intentional act of kindness toward others in the course of our week starts to raise our awareness of the needs of others and the opportunities we have to minister to them. It may also change our mindset over time and if a whole congregation did it together and shared their experiences it would be powerful.

Think about it for your life, or your church. One intentional act of kindness each week in Jesus' name. Just one. Soon you won't settle for only one!

Endings in our lives are normal

We tend to do beginnings much better than we do endings! But just as beginnings are a normal part of life, so are endings. Something must end before something else can begin. It may be a relationship that has run it's course, a job that has been miserable for years or maybe a termination that is long overdue. It may be a personal obligation that we have had for years and it is time to move on.

I am challenged by a new book by Henry Cloud called "Necessary Endings" where he seeks to normalize the endings in our lives, help us to see them as necessary as beginnings and to do endings as well as we do beginnings. Something must end before something else can begin. Somehow, however, we find endings far more difficult than beginnings.

Too often we see endings as negative when they are just a part of our lives. Not only that but they are the precursor to better things in many instances. I once resigned a job feeling like a failure. That ending was the best thing that could ever have happened to me as the situation was destroying me from the inside out. It opened up opportunities that I never would have had if I had stayed. I need not have agonized about "failing." It was a necessary ending and truly a gift.

I currently know leaders who need to end a relationship with someone on their staff but they cannot pull the trigger in spite of the fact that the staff member is in the wrong place and causing a drag on the ministry. Somehow they feel that it "would be too painful" to do end the relationship. Yet, that necessary ending is normal - and needed - and would open up opportunities for the staff member in the wrong role and the ministry that needs a new beginning.

Endings are obviously more challenging because of the emotional investment we have made over a period of time. Endings mean that we have to let go, move on, turn our attention to a new thing and be OK with the letting go. That takes a certain amount of maturity, intentionality and discipline to do well. The past can be celebrated but our attention, focus and emotions must move toward a new beginning - leaving the old behind. Imagine how Abraham would have fared if he had continually longed to be back to Ur after God told him to go to Canaan, necessitating an ending (Ur) and a new beginning (Canaan). The leaving was a necessary ending to the blessing he would receive by doing so. I cannot imagine it was easy.

Things run their course in our lives. And in order for something new to begin there must be and ending. I love my job but one day there will be an ending and how well I handle it will determine how well I move to a new beginning.

If you are struggling with a necessary ending, pick up a copy of Henry Cloud's book. He helps us think through a transition that is hard for all of us - but necessary - and the prelude to a new beginning. Endings are not bad. They are necessary.

Delivering on the promise

This afternoon I will be speaking to individuals who are in the final process of application for service in ReachGlobal and missionaries. In the several hours I have as RG's senior leader to unpack who we are I am in essence unpacking a promise to them about the kind of organization we are, what we believe in, how we do what we do and the culture we have. I won't call it the promise but those who end up on our staff will come with an expectation that what they heard is what they will find.

All organizations make explicit and implicit promises to those who work for them. These include the kind of culture and ethos we claim to be, the way we relate to one another, our ethical code, our treatment of our constituents and the mission that drives us. However, we often underestimate the importance of delivering on that promise.

Ministries (and I am including local churches here) that are faithful to the promise made to their staff are great places to work. Where this is found it is always the result of a senior leader and leadership team that take seriously a healthy and consistent culture within the staff. This is rarely accidental and almost always deeply intentional. No ministry wins an award for being a wonderful place to work accidentally.

I am privileged to consult with various ministries. In one recent situation I found a deeply cynical staff. General cynicism among staff is almost always an indicator that there is a significant gap between the ministry's stated culture and promise and reality which breeds the jaded attitudes. Further, the cynicism is generally aimed at the senior leader who is seen as saying one thing and doing another.

In both ministry and the business world we are very good at talking the right verbiage: values, mission, vision, trust, team, cooperation, synergy, "right people, right seat" and all the rest. That verbiage is often simply words and not lived out by senior staff and therefore by the organization hence the cynicism.

Good leaders are as intentional in their actions as they are with their words. They define a culture and put systems and commitments into place to ensure that the culture matches their words. And while they require all staff to live up to their commitments it always starts with the consistent actions of senior leaders.

They are also continually looking for gaps between the promise and reality. Because many staff will not volunteer to senior leaders where those gaps exist they go looking for gaps and ask a lot of questions. There are many senior leaders who are the only ones in the whole organization who don't know there are gaps and that is a bad thing. Leaders never assume that all is well. They find ways to either verify that the promise is being delivered or they find the gaps and backfill them.

I know that there are gaps in the ministry I lead as we have set the bar high. But my senior team also knows that I am resolved that we deliver on the promise I will be unpacking this afternoon with new potential staff and that we are serious that our words match our reality. Staff will be patient and forgiving if they know that senior leaders are serious and fill the gaps where they find them. That breeds confidence and trust rather than cynicism.

Why is this so important? First it is a matter of simple integrity: do our words match our commitments. Second, we owe our staff a healthy place to work - especially in the Christian ministry setting where anything else is inexcusable. Third, those we serve will be directly affected by the attitudes and health of our staff. In other words our delivering on the promise impacts our ability to deliver on our mission.

When ministries need to change

Many ministries have not kept up with the changes in today's world. This includes many churches but it is especially true in the mission world where I work. In many organizations radical change is needed.

A common response when faced with the need to change is to start tweaking the current paradigm. Tweaking is "fear based change." We are so afraid to rock the boat significantly that we hope we can tweak our way out of our predicament. It never works. Change requires new paradigms in how we think and new ways of delivering on our mission. Furthermore, talking change but making tweaks tells the whole staff that leadership is not truly committed to change so they can keep their heads down and continue to do what they have always done.

A similar response is that of incremental change. Going in the right direction but slowly. At the pace of change in our world today, those who move slowly will find themselves in the same place they currently are as change in our environment outpaces our ability to respond.

Another observation. Ministries are often unwilling to bring in an outside facilitator to help in the change process or to bring in new leadership from the outside. The sub culture they have created is not friendly to those coming from the outside with new ideas and new ways of thinking. This is an absolute killer of any real change because it leaves one locked into the very culture that must change if the organization is going to change. I am watching several ministry organizations right now wrestling with needed changes but until they bring in someone from outside their insular culture there is no chance that it will happen.

Often the leaders who brought an organization to where it is today cannot take it to where it needs to go tomorrow. But until boards and current leaders face that reality they will not move forward. Sometimes courageous choices need to be made and leadership or board changes need to take place if we want to re-invision the organization for its next run. Remember that while we always honor people, our stewardship of the ministry requires us to do the right thing for the ministry even if it means changes in staff. That is the real world. Do it graciously but don't be afraid to do it.

The issue of leadership courage is huge in change. Leading change is a tough business. People resist, some get nasty, change is messy, personnel changes must take place which can be hard, arrows come! It is the nature of change. Organizations that desire to change but who don't have a leader who can effectively lead the change will lose. In addition that leader must be able to articulate the new realities and vision so that people have clarity on where they are going even if they don't like the white waters of change.

If you know your organization needs significant change ask yourself these questions. Do we have clarity on what the future should look like? Do we have a leader who can take us there? Do we need to bring key staff in from the outside? Do we have the courage to let people go who no longer fit? Do we have the resolve to see this through? Are we willing to make radical paradigm shifts to get us to where we need to be?

Deep Influence and Deep Pain are Intimately Connected

For those who desire a life of influence, pain, while never invited is a gift nonetheless. Suffering develops perspective, character, forces us to focus on the important and shed the unimportant and brings us closer to a sovereign father if we respond by pressing into him. Unfortunately, there is no substitute for pain and suffering when it comes to our inner life, our relationship with Jesus and the renovation of our hearts.

Those who ask Him to help them become like Him, to give them a heart like His and to help them love as He loves are inviting suffering into their lives because that suffering is the very thing if responded to well that brings the desired result. In the New Testament, Peter, Paul and the writer of Hebrews all talk about the way that pain purifies and brings His transformation to our lives.

Think about this. When we are treated unfairly we learn what it means to trust our situation to God. When we are slandered we learn that it is God who holds our reputations in His hand. When we face serious illness we learn what it means to prioritize the elements of our lives and to shed the unimportant. When we cannot get through a day without His help and grace we learn what it means to live in His presence even hourly. When the unexpected slams into our lives and we are left reeling we learn that there is nothing more precious than our relationship with Him - when all is said and done, He is what we need.

I don't relish pain. Those who know me know that Mary Ann and I have had our share. The funny thing is that in retrospect while I never want to go through certain situations again, I can today thank God for the hard and painful gifts he brought through suffering. I can say with certainty that the contours of my heart have been irrevocably shaped in suffering and that nothing else would have sufficed. When C.S. Lewis said that pain is God's megaphone to us he was right. Thus I call it an unlikely gift but a gift nonetheless because it was God speaking to me through the pain - it was Jesus who wanted to get in touch with me in my suffering.  Pain is God's certified mail to our very souls if we will but listen.

One of my sons told me once that he thought God would really use him in a significant way. In the aftermath of that conversation I thought about the price he would pay if that were to be the case. Spiritual influence comes at a price which is why those who have suffered deeply often influence us the deepest. They have been forced to go deep with God and the quality of their hearts and lives show it well. In contrast, those who simply want a life of ease and safety may get their wish but it will be at the expense of spiritual influence they might have had. 

The wonderful truth is that when we suffer and press into God we "share in His sufferings," in the words of Paul to the Philippians. We join our savior in the suffering that He endured for the sake of His father and for ours. We never suffer alone but have a high priest who has gone before us and understands the pain we feel and the issues we face. That is the gift of the incarnation. God, who had not known the frailties of those He created, became one of the created so that He could not only redeem us but identify with us forever. Thus in all pain and suffering we live with the reality that He not only went before us but goes with us in full understanding, compassion, grace, comfort and presence.

If you are living with the reality of pain today, my prayer is that God will comfort you and that you will go deep with Him and that out of it all will come deep and abiding relationship with the Father and deep influence with those around you. And to a friend out east who is in the confluence of pain, I pray that you will be encouraged, that God will do His work and that you will emerge stronger than ever.

Investing in your staff

It is easy for leaders at all levels to become so busy with their own work that they neglect one of their fundamental responsibilities - growing their staff. For those of us who lead, staff development is not an ancillary but a primary part of our job. In fact, our ministry success is deeply wrapped up with the quality, focus and capacity of those who work under our leadership. Not only that: leading others is a stewardship and they have a right to expect that we will help them become all that they can be in the positions they are in.

This is not about micromanaging - a demotivating activity for staff. Nor is it about telling them how to do what they need to do - if one needs to do that one has the wrong staff. Rather it is about understanding the wiring of staff members and through dialogue and discussion helping them maximize their gifts strategically in the role they play.

Good leaders are exegetes of their staff. They seek to understand how each individual is wired, what motivates and demotivates them, where their strengths and weakness are, their emotional intelligence and even the shadow side of their personality (we all have one). Without a basic understanding of these elements of personality one cannot help others grow and develop. That is why staff development is a very personalized art and why leaders need to take the time to get to know those they supervise in more than a superficial way.

One of the greatest gifts we can give staff is time with them in dialogue regarding their work. There are three specific things that I look for: focus, strategy and relationships.

Focus is all about helping staff keep the main thing the main thing and not become distracted by activity. Activity does not equal results. Results come from a clear and focused set of priorities that is translated into schedule and activity. Can your staff articulate what is most important in their work and do their schedule and priorities reflect those big rocks they have articulated. Further do they have the correct big rocks? Lack of focus is one of the primary reasons for less than satisfactory results for all of us.

Second, do they have a strategy that makes sense? Is their strategy designed for addition (based around what they can do) or multiplication (getting others involved)? Does their strategy maximize the opportunity or leave things on the table? Socratic dialogue around these issues can sharpen their thinking and help them to leverage their time and efforts for the best results.

Third, how are are they doing with other staff and volunteers? Relationships are the coinage of ministry success. Helping staff grow in their ability to work with others productively, handle robust and candid discussion without defensiveness and resolve conflict and differences are non-negotiable elements of ministry success. Don't wait till there is a crisis to press into relational issues. They matter all the time.

An extended conversation around these kinds of things on a monthly basis will help you surface issues, talk through challenges, keep the focus sharp and help your staff report think more strategically. If we neglect this kind of time with direct reports we will inevitably pay for it. It is one of the best investments we can make because our ministry success is directly tied to the ministry acumen of those we lead. Make the investment monthly and you will reap the benefits in a big way.

Don't get caught in the church numbers game

What spells success for a local church? For many pastors the answer is how many attend their church. I drove by a Unitarian church with a full parking lot on Sunday. By our common definition of success they had achieved it - or the Mormon temple two blocks from my house that draws a full crowd. Seen in that light we realize that numbers are not everything and sometimes are nothing when it comes to success.

In fact, numbers may be the worst definition of success for churches and pastors. Churches do not grow indefinitely. Many pastors are not equipped to lead a large church but are wonderfully equipped to lead a small or medium size church. All of us have a leadership ceiling and internal wiring that defines the size of an organization we can effectively lead. Since God gave us that wiring we have to assume He is pretty happy with it and so should we be. One of my ministry buddies is a great preacher and the quintessential shepherd pastor. He pastors a church of around 250 and is wonderfully fulfilled in that role. His lane is not a church of 500 or larger where he would be frankly miserable. He is fulfilling his God given calling in a smaller church.

Further, the focus on numbers can easily cause us to move away from a full presentation of the gospel to embrace an attractional model of church where the goal is to attract as many people as possible and in the process to water down the emphasis on disciple making which actually demands something from those who come. There are plenty of large churches full of untransformed people which is not a New Testament definition of success. And remember that most church growth in the United States is not about new conversions but simply about people transferring from one church to another. How does that spell success?

We should also remember that many people are not enamored by large churches. They prefer a family size church where it is easier to know others, plug in and where relationships are easier to build. There are far more avenues of direct involvement possible in smaller churches than in large churches.

What we ought to really be focused on is not numbers but helping our congregation experience true spiritual transformation: Hearts transformed by grace; thinking transformed by God's word; priorities transformed to align with His word and relationships transformed by His love. Pastors often say to me, "I don't know how to do the vision thing." My answer is that ninety percent of vision in the church is simply helping people live out the Gospel in their lives, their homes, their neighborhoods and their places of work. This is true in a large church or a small church. Size is not an indicator of success - transformed people are. 

Can small churches grow? Often they do so by church planting. They may not desire to grow significantly in numbers as a congregation but all churches can grow by multiplying themselves in church planting. And there will indeed be conversion growth for any body that is focused on spiritual transformation. Get the focus right and true spiritual fruit happens - John 15. 

There are always reasons for church size - a complex set of variables that we cannot address in full here. But I would say to any pastor, the measure of your success is not in your attendance numbers as much as it is in the transformation that is taking place among your people. Even in the New Testament there were huge churches and tiny house churches and all kinds in between. While God's people grew in numbers there were still all sizes of churches and there is no reference as to numbers being the sign of success for any of them. Transformation was a sign as well as ministry engagement - see Ephesians. People coming to Christ was a sign - see the book of Acts. But church size was not.

Rather than getting caught in the numbers game, we all ought to be focused on transformed lives which leads to new people coming to Christ. And, be who you are made to be as a church whether a small neighborhood church or a mega church. The numbers don't tell the story, Gospel engagement does.

Power, Humility and Leaders

Leadership advancement must be accompanied by a parallel advancement in personal humility. This is a paradox as leadership advancement brings with it additional power, opportunities, freedom, perks and responsibilities - all of which are more likely to lead to pride than to humility which is the only antidote to the dark side effects of additional power.

Humility is not a denigration of the leadership gifts we may possess. Healthy leaders are by nature self confident, self assured and have a bank of experience and wisdom from which to draw on. Some will actually see that confidence as arrogance when in fact it is simply self assurance. Paul tells us to have an accurate read of our strengths and we need not apologize for leadership acumen. Most if not all leaders have run into people who don't like their ability to make clear directional decisions and accuse them of arrogance. Usually that reflects more on the accuser than the accused.

At the same time, leadership gifts bring with them unique personal challenges because of the power it brings. Decision making power which can be used more for our benefit than for others, influence over the careers of others, additional personal freedom with a larger "sandbox" in which to play along with less candid feedback from those around us who may choose to play to our leadership role rather than engage in robust, honest, candid discussion.

It is not unusual for leaders to lose some of their sensitivity to others as their role increases. There can be an expectation for others to serve them, agree with them, and live up to their expectations whether they are appropriate expectations or not. They can also lose the ability to listen closely and carefully - after all they are busy and distracted by many issues. In the ministry world, there is the added dimension of "spirituality" in the leadership equation where "God speaks" and leaders can use the "God's direction" to go where they desire to go. How does one argue with God?

How do leaders grow their personal humility as they are handed greater authority, power and freedom? First, while leaders are often lifted up by others with perks, titles and respect, they go deep into their own hearts, souls and lives to understand and respect the depths of their own depravity. None of us look as good on the inside as we do on the outside and leaders cultivate a high view of their own fallenness in order to not be deceived by the adulation of others. In doing so, they develop a greater understanding of their true self, vulnerabilities, need of God's grace and forgiveness and their personal understanding balances out the adulation of others.

Second, healthy leaders surround themselves with people who will be honest with them. Unhealthy leaders surround themselves with people who will play to their ego. There is a huge distinction! One of the reasons for building healthy leadership teams is that there are multiple voices that weigh in on critical decisions and robust dialogue of a group rather than the single voice of one. You can tell the nature of a leader by those he or she surrounds themselves and by how candid those individuals can be with their leader. Personally, I will never again work for a leader with whom I cannot be completely honest behind closed doors.

In fact, healthy leaders go out of their way to solicit information, opinions, feedback and advice on critical decisions. True self assurance is not intimidated by the differing opinions of others and actually desire the opposing view so that they can understand all angles and potential unintended consequences. Any leader who is intimidated by strong opinions that differ from theirs is actually an unhealthy leader. Those leaders who don't want to listen and dialogue with other strong voices are more concerned with their own ego and power then with leading well. It is about them, not about those they lead.  

Third, leadership brings with it power, options, and greater freedom. Many leaders use those perks of leadership for their own purposes. Healthy leaders use those perks to help those they lead. The power of leadership, for instance, can be used to further our own goals or it can be used to remove barriers and pave the way for our staff to be more successful. Our freedom as leaders gives us the opportunity to extend greater freedom to others, to be their advocates and to tackle the politics of the organization that they are not in a position to deal with.

Leaders do not need to apologize for the greater freedom they have because of their leadership role. They have earned it. But, the best leaders use that freedom on behalf of their teams not on behalf of themselves. They use the power of their position to serve those they lead! Power in itself is not bad. It depends on how that power and influence is used. I have been helped over the years in significant ways by those above me who could intervene on my behalf and without whom I would not be in the leadership role I am today. They used their influence to help me in situations I could not negotiate by myself.

Power and humility are two sides of the same coin for healthy leaders. If you lead, how are you doing on the balance between the two?

Boundaries matter

All of us have boundaries in our personal lives, our work and our relationships. Those boundaries are designed to keep us in moral, ethical, legal and healthy places. When we start to violate those boundaries and play with the boundary lines we are in dangerous territory.

How well we keep our boundaries is a matter of our humility. Pride says, "those boundaries don't matter for me." Humility says, "Those boundaries apply to me just like they apply to others and they are there for my own good." The human heart has endless ability to move the boundary markers in our own lives and to rationalize the decision. It is the nature of sin to think that the rules don't apply to us. It is actually narcissism - the rules don't apply to me, I am above them.

In ancient times, boundaries were marked by stones and it was a major offence to move a boundary stone: they were sacred and immovable. So it should be in our lives. The ethical and moral lines laid down in Scripture are there for our protection and represent the immovable boundary stones of a righteous God. We have other boundary stones in our workplaces that are equally immovable. The moment we start to move the stones, our hearts are in jeopardy and the deceit of pride has reared its dangerous head. God says the markers matter. The evil one says they don't - at least for us.

We ought to ask ourselves periodically if we are playing with any boundary markers in our lives. Have we moved any? Are we skating across any? Are we thinking that any of them don't apply to us? None of us is exempt from moving the markers. All of us are tempted to do so. But it never turns out well and once we have moved one it is easier to move another and another and another. The boundaries in our lives matter and the wise humbly acknowledge that they apply to them not just to others.

If any markers have been moved the smartest thing we can do is repent and put them back where they originally belonged. Boundaries matter.

The River of Marriage

When I think about marriage, my metaphor is that of the Mississippi river which runs through my city of St. Paul. Its source is Lake Itasca in Minnesota where you can literally walk across it as a small stream, stepping on a few stones. From that humble and small beginning it meanders slowly southward for 2,320 miles to the Mississippi River delta.

On its long journey, it is a watershed for nearly 40% of the United States as rivlets run into streams and streams run into rivers and those rivers run into the mighty Mississippi. By the time it reaches its termination, it is discharging between 200 and 700 thousand cubic feet of water per second into the gulf. Its start is inconspicuous to the massive force of its end where its width spans as far as the eye can see and its strength pushes fresh water far out into the gulf with enough force that for miles its contents don’t even mix with the salt water of the ocean.


While marriage is exciting and exhilarating at its start, it is but a small trickle of what it can become if its partners are willing to share the long journey of a life together. The width and depth of a marriage well lived can be seen in the relationships and influence of those who have withstood the numerous bends in the journey, some joyful, some hard and some where they simply had to hang on together in faith - not knowing what was around the next bend. Marriages that have withstood the journey carry with them the weight of thousands of accumulated streams and rivers that have added to their strength widening and deepening a relationship that seemed so strong but was but a tiny stream in comparison at its inception.


And what are those streams and rivers that flow into the marriage over the years that add to its depth and width? Every time a partner serves the other, a stream flows into their relationship. Every time forgiveness is extended a stream flows into their relationship. When they walk through tough times in faith and commitment, rivers flow into their relationship. Every act of love, service, forgiveness, and commitment adds to the flow of their marriage which over the years and around bends too numerous to count cause it to flow with strength, depth and amazing power – having influenced many along the way.


Any captain will tell you that the Mississippi is a challenging river to navigate with its constantly changing sandbars and shifting channels. Marriage is no different. What did Mary Ann and I really know when we made vows at twenty about “in sickness and in health” and for “richer or for poorer?” It is in facing those unknowns that will unexpectedly appear together and with faith in a loving God that adds strength to our marriages.


When you see a couple in their eighties with wizened faces, unsteady legs and holding arthritic hands, don’t be fooled. They may look frail but if they have taken this journey called marriage together, they have depth and wisdom and a kind of commitment that nothing can break. Like the mighty Mississippi that flows into the gulf with great strength and force, their marriage has grown exponentially from that initial trickle of a stream so many years before. And they will tell you if you ask that it was worth the effort and that their love and commitment is great and there is a deep satisfaction that they weathered the challenges that marriage inevitably brings. Their small stream of love has turned into a river, wide and deep.

Definitions of poverty and wealth in the majority world

When it comes to how we spend money in missions it is critical to ensure that we are not hurting more than we are helping. Some of this comes down to our definitions of what poverty and wealth are and how our definitions skew our view of others. Because the west has so much in the way of financial resources and the majority world so little we tend to think that we need to solve their issues with money. And while money is key to mission efforts, how we spend that money and what we give it for can either help or damage our cause. Many well intentioned mission projects actually do more damage then good.

Take a moment and read this insightful article by Steve Saint on this important topic.

http://www.missionfrontiers.org/issue/article/projecting-poverty-where-it-doesnt-exist#.TnkUpjFS5E0.facebook 

An excellent book on this topic is When Helping Hurts which should be a must read for all mission committees. In addition, I have a blog post titled When Money Hurts Mission Efforts.

Not all that looks like poverty is truly poverty. Sometimes it is our own definitions, not reality. One can be rich in many ways without being wealthy and much of what passes as wealth in the west is truly poverty of life and spirit.