Characteristics of gracious leaders

I love meeting gracious leaders. There is a quality about them which endears them to both insiders and outsiders alike. They possess a set of important characteristics that all leaders can emulate and learn from. Here are some of the most important.

When they are with you they are focused on the conversation rather than thinking about other things. Being present in the moment when with others is a discipline that says, "you are important," "I am interested in what you are saying." Too many leaders do not allow themselves to be fully present but are rather obviously thinking about other things.

Gracious leaders like to listen and ask questions. In other words they are focused outwardly toward others rather than inwardly toward themselves. They engage in your life, your ministry, your family and you!

Gracious leaders are generous in their praise, thanks and appreciation and sparing in criticism. When they do need to press into an issue they do it gently and clearly but you always get the sense that they care about you and want you to succeed.

They don't hold grudges and have short memories about negative events in the past. Gracious leaders have a way of focusing on the positive while not ignoring the negative. They keep short accounts, let you know what you think even when course corrections are needed and then move on.

The language of gracious leaders is uplifting, encouraging and life giving. That last quality is critical. Think about those you interact with that discourage or drain you. Gracious leaders are the opposite. After interactions with them you are filled and encouraged because gracious leaders are life givers rather than life takers. You want to be around them as a result.

Gracious leaders may be busy but they are never too busy to take the time to stop, acknowledge others and to interact with them. They give the impression that their staff and constituency is supremely important and do so because it is genuinely true as outward focused individuals.

Gracious leaders can be gracious with others because they are comfortable in their own skin and at home with themselves. In other words they have paid attention to their own hearts and inner lives and as a result that healthy inner life spills out in their relationships with others. Their graciousness is both a discipline (how I treat others) and a habit (because they are healthy internally). 

In many ways the Fruit of the Spirit encompasses the character of a gracious leader. It is a worthwhile exercise for leaders to regularly ask themselves if their relationships are characterized by the fruit of love, joy, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self control. The more we focus on these and develop our inner lives around them the more gracious we will become.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

The scourge of sex trafficking: It is happening right now somewhere near you!

One of the great scourges of our day is the trafficking of women and children around the world for the purposes of prostitution and pornography. And it is probably taking place in your community whether in the open or behind the scenes through Craigslist, Backpage and a host of other internet portals. In fact, while we hold the slavery trade of the past as abhorrent, it is estimated that there are more slaves trafficked today than at the height of the slave trade. 

And in many places in the world it is out in the open. This picture from Mong Kok, in Hong Kong at the entrance to a brothel on a public street.

The globalization of our world and the ability to ship goods, services and people around the world has only heightened this scourge. Trafficked women can be found not only in the large cities of our world but in places like North Dakota where the oil fields are bringing in men from across America to work. In other words, this is not an isolated phenomenon to places like Bangkok but it is ubiquitous wherever there are men who are willing to pay for sex. 

Consider these statistics from Equality Now:

• At least 20.9 million adults and children are bought and sold worldwide into commercial sexual servitude, forced labor and bonded labor.
• About 2 million children are exploited every year in the global commercial sex trade.
• Almost 6 in 10 identified trafficking survivors were trafficked for sexual exploitation.
• Women and girls make up 98% of victims of trafficking for sexual exploitation.

What lies behind these statistics are lives ruined, people made in the image of God desecrated and untold misery. They are someone's daughters, boys and girls. Unfortunately in many countries there is little done other than lip service to the problem as corrupt and complicit authorities either profit from this trade or have compromised themselves in it and will not speak out. 

Christ followers have long been the conscience of social ills of our world. This is not an issue we should be ignorant about or afraid to talk about. Pressure needs to be put on governments world wide to actually act rather than sign UN treaties on the matter and then turn a blind eye. Ways must be found to rescue these individuals and help them rebuild their lives, one at a time, into what God designed them to be.

If you want an accessible book to help understand the problem of global sex trafficking, I recommend Slavery Inc. the untold story of international sex trafficking by Lydia Cacho

The International Justice Mission IJM is on the forefront of dealing with this evil issue. Their web site is a great resource. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

When making decisions are you thinking five years ahead?

All leaders make decisions on a regular basis. Often, however we are thinking of the present as we do so - which is legitimate. But, every decision made now has implications for the future which is why we should apply the five year test: "How will our current decision affect us five years from now?" In other words, good decisions are not only made for the present but must take into consideration the future as well.

Let me give an illustration from the world of missions. A mission agency decides that to make significant inroads in a majority world country it will start paying pastors what seems like an insignificant amount of money per month (say $150). They jubilantly watch all kinds of individuals sign up, start churches and they think, "Wow, a small investment for a great return." Yet five years later it has now become a burden to the agency as they can no longer sustain what they once thought was a strategic decision and they have discovered that these churches only reproduce themselves when there is another $1,800 to invest.  Had the decision been made with an eye to the future it might have been evident what the unintended consequences are. 

Many decisions have long term consequences so a good question on major decisions is not simply, "What is the impact now" but also "what will be the impact five years from now." 

This is just as powerful a practice in our own personal lives. Decisions about time with family have long term consequences as do financial decisions and any number of other personal decisions. Wise individuals take the long view of life rather than simply living in the moment. The long view requires more discipline but in the end it is far more productive and rewarding.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Arrogance or humility in leadership is found in how we treat staff

While many have been watching high profile evangelical leaders who have treated staff and congregants poorly, the truth is that this happens all the time in otherwise good evangelical churches and Christian ministries. I routinely see this first hand as I consult and hear regularly from people who have experienced heavy handed treatment. I would say that there is more pain from poor treatment of staff in the church and ministry world than in the corporate world. This is partly because they can get away with it as people are not likely to cause division by broadcasting the issues.

Mistreatment of people is a sign of leadership arrogance. Often boards are complicit as well when they do not verify what they are hearing from their senior pastor or allow what they know to be heavy handed tactics. Here are some common ways that arrogance is demonstrated in the treatment of staff and/or congregants.

One: Staff who try to raise legitimate issues or engage in legitimate dialogue are shut down by senior leaders through intimidation or threats. This is far more common than many people realize. The threat can be for their job (and there are many ways to threaten one's job subtly), it can be around causing division (by a difference of opinion?), ridicule, or a pattern of simply firing those who disagree. When there is fear within a staff culture there is clear indication that intimidation is taking place and there are many churches where this is the case.

One of the most egregious kinds of intimidation is a gag order where staff are not allowed to talk about issues with themselves, with members of the congregation or with elected leaders and  their leadership will not let them into the process of ministry decisions. They are essentially left without a voice, without a place to go with their concerns and live with the fear that if they voice their concerns they will be called to task. All such gag orders are a sign of poor leadership, they are dysfunctional, they lead to toxicity and a culture of mistrust and eventually good people will choose to leave. 

A second sign of arrogance in leadership is when staff are let go without due process. Even with "at-will" employment in many places I am amazed that there are not more lawsuits for staff being fired by senior leaders for highly questionable leaders (I just want them gone) without due process. Sometimes the fired staff are not even told why they are being let go. Due process means a process where the issues are explained, there is the ability for the staff person to defend themselves and if necessary there is a third party present. I have seen countless examples where staff are "gotten rid of" by senior leaders who either don't like them, don't like their opinions or simply want to fill slots with sycophants who will do their bidding - all without true due process.

Even when there are performance issues, the first question should be, has this person been coached and mentored and can we help them get to where they need to go. If many senior leaders were treated like they treat their staff, they would understand what it feels like to be at the capricious will of a dysfunctional leader and it does not feel good. 

Another way that arrogance is expressed in treatment of staff is very simple: not listening to staff, not soliciting their views, and not engaging them in the process of ministry decisions even though they are stakeholders and will be impacted by those decisions. I am always amazed when senior pastors (many when they first arrive and are going to solve everything that is bad in the church - from their perspective) make sweeping unilateral decisions without even engaging their senior staff. It is a fast way to lose all coinage with staff. And it is highly disempowering. 

Why do I call behavior like this arrogant? Because it is clearly all about the leader and what he/she wants and not about the staff. Anytime we mistreat staff we are using our authority and power in ways they were never meant to be used. Nor did Jesus operate this way. Humility is a recognition that we need each other, honor each other, build team and always treat others with fairness, integrity and dignity. Humble leadership may take more time to get some things done but it will build to last with a reservoir of trust. Arrogant leadership can move fast but at the deficit of trust and through using and abusing staff along the way.

A word to elected leaders. Behaviors like this are usually blissfully ignored by boards. Why? Their leader is getting things done or they simply don't want to address it. Ultimately if such behaviors are taking place on your watch you are responsible even if not the agent. Poke around a bit and make sure that your staff culture is as healthy as you are told it is. Often it is not. I know because eventually I get called into situations when they come apart and I always wonder why leaders either did not know or did not intervene.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Six common misconceptions about Teamwork - From the Harvard Business Review

Six Common Misperceptions about Teamwork

Letter of apology to two staff members who where unfairly let go from a group of present and former elders. Worth reading

I was fascinated by a letter of apology from current and former elders at Mars Hill Church to two members of their staff who were put on trial some years ago, found guilty without due process and publicly humiliated them by their communication to the entire church which included "rejection and disassociation" from the church and members of the church. Now, members of the board at that time and new members are calling their actions sinful and asking the forgiveness of these two former staff members. As I read their letter it raised some issues for me.

First, when you shut down legitimate discussion in an organization and take dissenting viewpoints as "sinful" or "disloyal" or "causing division" and shut those voices down with threats, intimidation or termination we create a toxic workplace where candid dialogue is not allowed. Ironically, the issues that these two men were raising, were the very issues that allowed the church to get into trouble and eventually led to the downfall of the church.

As the elders wrote to them, "you each had every right as an elder to openly express your strong concerns about the bylaws and to influence our thinking so that we might have made the most informed decision possible. You also had good reason to contact the church’s attorney about those bylaws. These were not sinful acts of mistrust on your part, but reasonable acts of due diligence. We needed to learn from you at that time and we should have trusted you and respected your spiritual authority as elders of the church to educate us about potential problems with those bylaws. Instead, we silenced your voices through our complicity in your terminations and our decisions to remove Paul as an elder and keep Bent on probation instead of examining the issues more closely."

Any leader that tries to shut down discussion by intimidation is a toxic leader and it is their toxicity that needs to be addressed rather than legitimate discussion over legitimate issues. In our organization we allow "Robust Discussion" on any issue with the exception of personal attacks or hidden agendas. If your organization practices any kind of intimidation for candid discussion, take heed. Often it is the senior leader who leads the charge because they are threatened by voices that disagree with them.

Second, there are thousands of church leaders who owe an apology to staff members that they have treated unfairly, badly and without due process. I was saddened by friends of ours who were fired from their pastoral position without any due process or even conversation around the reasons for the decision. I suspect the senior leader was threatened and led the charge. He had stated he did not want them there. Then when the same was done to him by the elders he wined about what had happened to him. They had simply done to him what he had done to others.

There are many deeply wounded staff who have been unfairly treated by their senior leader and boards have allowed it to happen. If you are guilty of this, please don't ignore the pain you caused, the lack of due diligence you allowed or the actions you were a party to. Make things right. Jesus will one day hold us accountable for how we have treated those entrusted to us. One friend who read this letter from Mars Hill wept because of the pain they had experienced and wished someone would reach out and make it right. Sadly it probably will not happen.

Take a few moments and read this letter of apology 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

God's meta story and a tale of two kingdoms

Fundamental to understanding the meta story of God is to recognize that with the fall and God’s redemptive story there are now two kingdoms at play on our planet. There is the kingdom of evil and the Kingdom of God and the two are at war with one another.

Consider the names given to Satan and his minions: “rulers, authorities, powers of this dark world, the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms (Ephesians 6:12). Satan is the prince of one Kingdom. Jesus, however is the king of another kingdom and He defeated Satan on the cross once and for all, even though Satan continues to fight a rearguard war until Jesus returns to rule over all things. But make no mistake, he is defeated but not yet silenced.

Peter puts this in perspective for us when he writes that we are “strangers in the world” (1 Peter 1), and “aliens” (1 Peter 2:11). We were born into this world, but through our “new birth” (1 Peter 1:3) we are now “a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, people belonging to God” (1 Peter 2:9) who once lived in “darkness” (the kingdom of this world) but now live in “his wonderful light” the kingdom of God (1 Peter 2:10). We were born into one world – that ruled by Satan but are now citizens of a different world, that ruled by Jesus.

When Peter uses the word “darkness” to describe the world ruled by Satan and “his wonderful light” to describe the Kingdom of God he is contrasting the utter darkness of Satan and his rule and the magnificent righteousness of Jesus and His rule. As God’s people we live in the light but remain physically in a broken world.

Here, of course is the challenge. Jesus did not take us out of this world when He rescued us. This was intentional. As Jesus said in John 17:15-18, “My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world.” 

We were born into one world – that ruled by Satan but are now citizens of a different world, that ruled by Jesus, who has sent us back into the world with His message of hope, redemption and mercy. We are now called to join Jesus in the re-imaging of hearts gone bad and a world gone bad.

I am a third culture kid (TCK). I grew up on Hong Kong until I was 15 and then came back to the United States. I grew up in a culture that was not my home culture and then came back to my home culture which was not the one in which I grew up. I feel most at home in Asia but my home is not there. I live in the United States but it is not my heart culture. Thus the designation, a third culture kid. At 58 I still live with the ambiguities of growing up in a culture not my own and coming back to one not my own. I am torn between the two and like many others who grew up in a country not their own, I have to negotiate the two dissimilar cultures.

This is a picture of our own lives as we negotiate the culture in which we were born (the kingdom of darkness) and the culture into which we have been adopted (the kingdom of Jesus) and must negotiate the two until the day in which we see Christ face to face. It is not easy negotiating the two and yet this is one of the things Jesus showed us how to do in the incarnation. He demonstrated what it looked like to follow the Father while living in the Evil One’s world and in doing so how to be salt and light in that darkness. Jesus engaged the world as He shared the Good News of the Kingdom but he lived by the values of His Father rather than by the rules of a fallen world. He engaged with people but not with the mores of the world.

When Peter wrote his letter to Christians who had been scattered by persecution and called them “strangers in the world,” (1 Peter 1:1), he was acknowledging the difficulties of living as God’s people in a fallen world. He was also acknowledging the clash of the kingdom of evil and the kingdom of light and challenges of negotiating these two very different kingdoms. 

Some Christians over the ages have chosen to withdraw from the world and to see the world as evil. Jesus on the other hand showed us what it is like to engage the world and to see people as His image bearers however tarnished and what it means to join Him in ReImaging images gone bad. Jesus is not in the business of hiding but in the work of engaging and restoring.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Cracks in the atheist edifice in China - a very encouraging update from the Economist Magazine

Economist article on Christianity in China

A short article that every married man ought to read: It is profound

This article from Gary Thomas's blog is a must read for all married men. One simple thought that can change your relationship with your wife forever.

Father-in-Law

Ministries are either built to last or built to fail - think about Mars Hill

It was fascinating but not surprising news this week that one of the famous ministries of our day is dissolving with the resignation of its founder, Mark Driscoll. Come New Year's day, 2015 the Mars Hill Church of Seattle will cease to exist although some of their satellite locations may choose to become independent churches.

There are some lessons to be learned from this. The first is that it is always perilous to build a ministry around one individual rather than a team that is in Jim Collin's terms "Built to Last." Any ministry dependent on one individual faces a crisis if that individual dies or leaves. Such ministries often revolve around a single leader because that leader is fundamentally unwilling to delegate responsibility and authority to others. In my view, no local church should be organized this way and when it is it often reflects a narcissistic leader who needs to control. Clearly there was not a healthy culture at Mars Hill which almost always reflects the DNA of its leader.

Well built ministries have leadership teams not a single leader and they are designed to function well even if the senior leader for some reason leaves that ministry. That structure reflects a greater concern for the mission and the ministry while structures built around an individual reflect a greater concern for the wishes and control of that individual. The first is reflective of a kingdom mindset and the second of a egotistical mindset (with a few exceptions). All ministries built around one individual are fragile entities!

My second observation is that Mars Hill lacked what every good church should have and that is local leadership that is empowered to hold its senior leader accountable and to rein in problematic behavior. Certainly in a church that size there are many highly qualified leaders, yet in the main the board of overseers was from the outside with neither the ongoing context or the ability to shepherd the pastor, let alone ensure that the church was healthy. 

For current leaders to make the decision they have made indicates clearly that they had few good options which is a reflection of the damage Mark did in the past several years, the lack of a structure that was built to last and of a strong leadership team that should have been able to weather the storm. And in case you think this is piling it on, think of the hundreds of staff and thousands of congregants for whom the church was their livelihood or place of worship and you start to understand the enormity of the corporate pain that must be present this week at the news that your church will disappear in two months. Not because there was a planned transition but because the leadership of the organization was so poor there were no good options left.

I also hope, thirdly that all of us in ministry take heed of the lessons of this sorry tale. Our character as leaders counts. Our words, attitudes, decisions and treatment of people matter a lot. I am amazed at how many people responded to Mark's behavior as OK (after all we are all human). Yet the Scriptures are clear that those in Christian leadership bear a far higher level of responsibility for their behaviors and character than others. It is one thing to have a bad day - we all have them. It is another to have a pattern of behaviors that violate Scriptural guidelines and not be called on it. To give Mark a pass because he built a large organization misses the point that success (defined by the world's definition) is never an excuse for not living up to the calling we have in Christian leadership. 

Taken together, the decision this week goes to a failure of leadership by Mark and leaders, a failure to build a healthy organization and a willingness to overlook important issues because people came in large numbers and gave generously. The speed at which it came apart in the end is indicative of deep fissures and a poor foundation. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

The world of me - a growing epidemic in society and among believers

The world of me - life is about me, I am entitled, others should pay attention to me and I have a right to be unsatisfied, unhappy and even angry when things don't go my way is an increasing disease in our western society. And it afflicts believers as much as non-believers which is very troubling since for Christ followers, life is never about us but always about Jesus. It is what Jesus was getting at when He spoke of taking up our cross and following Him. Life was never about us. It was always about Him.

Let me make this very personal. Think of all the conflict in local churches because everyone wants their own way and their preferences become the non-negotiables. And if our church does not satisfy us, we just leave and go elsewhere. Think of pastors who create conflict in their congregation because they are the leader and they want their way. In fact they are entitled to it and are committed to getting it no matter what. This is about the world of me!

Think of friendships easily broken because someone disagreed with us. It is OK if the world is about me! Or, co-workers who must get their way and when it doesn't happen, become difficult and passive aggressive, and will not do the hard work of understanding one another, a non value if the world is about me.

For those who blame others for their issues, who take the credit instead of giving it away, who talk more than they listen and are defensive when challenged, there is a reason. The world is about me. 

We often cater to this thinking when our preaching is about what God can do for us to the exclusion of what we are called to be - followers of Jesus in our hearts, minds, priorities and relationships. If we are not careful, God can become just another distributor of blessings to keep me happy rather than my Lord and Savior who blesses wondrously but also calls us to radical followership. 

There are over 70,000 books on Amazon about "me." It begs the question for each of us as to who life is about in our own lives. And, whether we have been more acculturated by society than by Scripture and its Author. To the extent that life is about us, we miss the fact that the center of our lives is Jesus Himself. True fulfillment and joy comes not from a preoccupation with us but a devotion to Him.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Teaching our sons to be better fathers

Peter Morris
Guest blogger and Christ follower
Op-ed, Washington Post

We need to teach our sons to be better fathers. Here’s how.

Thank you for those who prayed for my surgery

It is Friday morning and I expect to be discharged shortly. I deeply appreciate those who prayed for my bariatric surgery. The procedure was on Tuesday. Wednesday was a tough day but by Thursday I was off of pain medication, walking regularly and eating my special diet (for now). Today I feel strong, am virtually pain free and looking forward to my leather chair, a good book and time with my bride, Mary Ann, at home.

Last night I got a great night of sleep, the first since surgery. The previous night they had been checking my blood sugars every half hour which made sleep nearly impossible. Interestingly, my need for insulin is already almost nil which is amazing. I may be off of insulin within weeks.

I am blessed to have so many friends who took the time to pray. Thank you so much. I look forward to being back to robust health soon. By tomorrow, the blog should be up and running as usual.

God also blessed me with great doctors and medical staff and I was able to share some of my books with them. The first evening on the unit I had a great friend of Mary Ann who provided exceptional care which was a great blessing. Several other of my staff members have been believers. All of them have been professional and helpful.

We are praying that this will put  cap on seven years of health issues that started in December 2007. All of us are ready to put this chapter to rest, thankful for what God has done but ready for a new chapter of life and health. Thank you for praying toward that end.

One map says a great deal about the growth rate of Evangelical Christianity globally

Check out this map on the Growth Rate of Evangelical Christianity globally

A world filled with fear and a heart filled with peace

The acceleration of fear in our world has been rapid: Ebola, ISIS, shootings, terrorism, beheadings, conflict, chemical weapons, have all become the stuff of 24 hour news cycles and indeed are cause for major concern. Many are feeling that there is an increased level of chaos in our world and it is hard to dispute that. And it is magnified by the ability to report from any corner of the world so the accumulated fear factor has a magnified affect. 

Contrast this with the words of Jesus in John 16:33, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” And then as Jesus was getting ready to leave and return to heaven he told the disciples, "Again Jesus said, “Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you John 20:23).” One of the great benedictions of Paul is found in Romans 15:13, "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

There is no question that we live in an uncertain and chaotic world. But as Jesus followers we are called to live with peaceful rather than fearful hearts because - we have the peace of Christ - and the person of Christ in every place and circumstance of our lives. Watch the news and the fear grows. Spend time with Jesus and His peace grows. 

There is no need to fear the world or live in fear - none - if we understand that Jesus brings peace to our hearts. It is the peace that comes with His promises and His presence. Yes, said Jesus you will have trouble in this world but take heart, I have overcome the world. Peace I leave with you. Live in His peace today.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

I would appreciate your prayers

This blog is very personal. Some of you know that on December 4, 2007 I went to the hospital with a very serious condition that should have taken my life. In the aftermath of that 45 day stay (31 days in the ICU and most of those in a coma) I struggled to get back to full health. A year later I had another similar stay in an ICU in Thailand and then a third stay in an ICU in Montana this summer. 

After my first long stay, I put on a fair amount of weight which my doctor says is a life threatening condition because of my propensity for lung issues and three episodes of pulmonary failure. Thus this coming Tuesday I will have bariatric surgery to resolve the weight issue (hopefully my insulin dependency) and get back to full health.

I would covet your prayers for successful surgery and a quick recovery. I would love to be back in a position of robust health for the work I do domestically and internationally. I thank you in advance for your prayers.

For those who would like updates you may access those at this blog address which was used for all three previous hospital stays: www.reachTJ.com

"Life is the most irreplaceable and fundamental condition of the human experience"

Joni Eareckson Tada to Brittany Maynard: God alone chooses the

day you die, not you

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Don't wait for a funeral to say what you really want to say

Today I did a short video for a friend who is receiving an award and recognition for his life work to this point. It was a privilege to communicate just a bit of the huge respect and love I have for him. He is a man of integrity, love for Jesus, great compassion, and he lives to please his Lord Jesus.

It reminded me of something important. We all know people whom we love and admire and respect. It is a shame that we do not tell them of our love and admiration more often. What an encouragement it would be to share our observations and feelings. The apostle Paul did this all the time in his letters. He acknowledged people for their work and expressed his love. He called out individuals by name and told them why he did so. 

Our world is full of discouragement. We can bring huge encouragement to those around us by simply acknowledging the good and faithfulness we see. If Jesus was not shy about showing His love and appreciation for those who followed Him, we should not be shy in showing our appreciation for those who have followed Him well and who we deeply appreciate.

To the one for whom I recorded the video I say this: You are a friend, a brother and a great example to many of what it means to follow Jesus. Who can you say that about and will you tell them?

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Some reflections on the Mars Hill situation

Those who read this blog regularly know that I am an advocate for healthy pastors, elders and churches. You also know that I regularly explore issues of dishealth because they impact others in a significant way. Like many, I have watched the situation in Seattle with Mars Hill Church and have some reflections on a number of issues it raises.

Reflection: Never give senior leaders a pass on behaviors that are unacceptable. I have seen this way too often. Boards often ignore behaviors in their senior leader either because he is getting things done or because he is "God's man" and we should not challenge him. Do we not get the fact that the qualifications for leaders are actually higher than for the rest of the church? If that is so, leaders are held to a higher standard than others yet we often give them a pass because we don't want to challenge them. Lets just say - there is no excuse for bad behavior toward others on the part of senior pastors. 

Reflection: Pay attention to trends and patterns. I worked with a church where a long string of people had been fired or let go as at Mars Hill. Yet the board had never challenged the pastor on why it had happened, nor had they done exit interviews on the circumstances that surrounded the staff who left. One may give leaders the benefit of the doubt but where there is a troubling pattern over time, good leaders must wake up and take notice. When I interviewed staff who had left from the church I mentioned, I heard horrified stories of abuse by a senior pastor. Yet the board had not paid attention to a pattern that should have given them great pause. (See my blog, When the bodies pile up).

Reflection: Bad behaviors when not addressed will spill over into the congregation. It would appear that Mars Hill leaders tried to keep the behaviors of their senior leader private. This led to severance agreements tied to non-disclosure legal documents. Rather than addressing the issues it would appear that they tried to hide the issues. Then when it started to go public in social media they seemed to blame those who made the allegations public. Think about this: If you don't listen to people who have been hurt and try to shut them up the issues will spill out because people have a sense of justice. In my personal view, the only reason that this went public in Seattle was that church leaders did not listen to those impacted by their senior leader, take them seriously or deal with the real issue. (See my blog, Eight dysfunctions of church governance boards)

Reflection: Sad as it is, some pastors are bullies and their agenda gets in the way of their treatment of people. One of the most read blogs on my site is entitled Abuse in the Church - When the Pastor is the bully. What is interesting to me is that this blog post gets consistent hits with a current count of well over 3,000. I can see the blogs being read in my analytics and it always makes me sad to see this one being read. Yet just today I received word of another situation that would indicate an unhealthy pastor who is acting like a bully. My question: Why do those around him allow him to get away with such behavior?

Reflection: Bad behavior on the part of senior leaders hurts the reputation of Jesus. Unhealthy leaders give those around them grounds to become cynical of the church. After all, when people are hurt, marginalized, mistreated, inappropriately treated or fired by the very people who are charged to be their shepherd - and are undershepherds of Jesus, what would one expect? Sometimes the very pastors that are trying to make their ministry accessible to unbelievers are the ones who sabotage those efforts by their own behavior. When public behavior is different than private behavior there is an obvious character flaw that must be addressed.

Reflection: When issues like these are not addressed in a timely fashion they hurt the bride of Jesus. We are watching Mars Hill let staff go, close venues, cut budgets and struggle to deal with the aftermath of the issues that have surrounded their former senior leader. They will be a wounded body for a long time to come and I lay the blame on the senior leader and church leaders who could have and should have done something about it a long time ago. All I can say is that it is very sad and a lot of innocent folks will be caught in the middle. 

The drama at Mars Hill is sad. We need to reflect on the lessons we can learn from their situation and ensure that it does not ever happen in ours. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

Words that should strike fear in every Christian leader

There are two statements of Jesus that ought to strike fear in every Christian leader. They are these: "Apart from me you can do nothing" (John 15:5), and "Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me" (John 15:4). The reason those are frightening words is that we are so used to doing things with the latest strategies, our fine education and great resources (in the west) and it is very easy to forget that eternal results only come from connection with the eternal God. That is the other side of the equation, "If a man remains in me and I in Him, he will bear much fruit" (John 15:5). The key is the closeness of our connection with Him.

What keeps Christian leaders from staying intimately connected with Jesus and dependent on Him in their ministries? I would suggest four common reasons:

• Pride. We simply think that we can do great things by ourselves because we have an inflated view of our own abilities and we chase our agendas over God's agendas - of course with the appropriate spiritual language to give it legitimacy.
• Busyness. We are too busy doing His work to really spend much time with Him. We begin to think that He will bless simply because we serving Him.
• Resources. We have the training, education, money and personnel to get things done so we simply go for it.
• Forgetfulness. We forget that the key to everything we do is our connection to Him.

We can indeed to much without God's help but we cannot do anything of eternal value without it. Fruit comes from Him alone and that is all about remaining in Him, in which case we will bear "much fruit." Ironically it is in doing less and abiding in Him that we actually see more because He is the the one who produces the fruit.

All of us would do well to regularly read and meditate on John 15. How are we doing in staying connected to the vine? How are we doing in "remaining in Him?" It is the leadership essential that we talk too little about as it is central to our success. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 discount on orders of ten or more.

The Kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed...

Guest Blog from Paul J Murphy

" Paul, bring a sermon with you to Uganda because the church will ask you to preach." I dutifully printed and packed one of my recent sermons and headed for Uganda. But, after being in Uganda for 4 days I realized the sermon I had packed was best left unused. So with a blank piece of paper, and a pen I sat down and reflected on what I had been seeing, hearing, and experiencing while in Uganda. And a sermon flowed. It spoke to the Ugandans, and it spoke to me.

"the Kingdom of Heaven is like a mustard seed planted in a field. It is the smallest of all  seeds, but it becomes the largest of garden plants and grows into a tree where birds can come and find shelter in its branches."   (Matthew 13:31-32)

Turn on the news, browse any news source and power struggles are the way of the world. This month it is Ebola and civil or sectarian wars in Syria and parts of the Middle East. Still wrenching from power struggles are Egypt, Iraq, Afghanistan, Somalia, South Sudan, Central African Republic, Congo, Thailand, Ukraine and Russia. and the list goes on and on...and on. Control through power - military, money, or political power is the world's way. The distortion of the golden rule is too often how things work - "the one with the gold makes the rules". Even here in our own country, money is often the driving influencer behind politics.

Jesus had no army (who would have felt alarmed if told "the disciples are invading!"). Jesus had no financial clout nor any political position or party affiliation. Yet 2,000 years after His death, Christianity is global and growing!

 "The Kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed".......

Nearly 20 years ago, 4 men in rural Uganda climbed onto their very used bicycles and began pedaling. They biked over 40 miles each way on dirt roads with ruts and potholes. They were biking to speak with a church planter evangelist named Patrick to ask if he would help plant a church in their rural area of Palisa, Uganda. Patrick agreed. Now, 18 years later, there are 35 churches in the Palisa region, which have sprung up from that one church plant - all of which came about due to the seed faith of 4 men who biked over 40 miles. They had no money...no army...no political clout. Just bikes and a love for The Lord.

 "The Kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed".......

Remember the Lord's Prayer..."Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth". How does the Kingdom come? What are we saying when we pray for that?

Jesus did not need an army, or money, or political "power" because the territory He seeks to conquer is the hearts and lives of people. The Kingdom is an inside-out movement. Money, military might, or political power cannot change a heart, nor can they create a voluntary surrender of heart loyalty. 

Hearts are softened and conquered by serving love. Look in Philippians chapter 2. Paul urges them to "be one in spirit and purpose" (2:2). He means being "others" instead of merely "self" focused (2:3-4). Jesus is the example (Philippians 2:5-8). Jesus did not cling to His status and position....Jesus emptied Himself becoming a "servant" of others (of 'sinners', not churchgoers)....Jesus suffered in love even to the point of a cruel and unfair death on a cross. All of that was for others. Jesus' way of extending the Kingdom was by serving others in love, even suffering in love. That is the polar opposite of how our world thinks about winning and ruling!

Yet, God honors humble, serving in love of others (see Philippians 2:9-12). And as followed of Jesus, we are to follow His lead (that is Paul's point in Philippians 2:12-16). Paul himself is a model of serving love (2:17-18) "even if my life is being poured out" for you... "I am glad and rejoice".  His life "poured out" in loving service of others. Just like Jesus.

 "The Kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed".......

Here is the point - you and I are like seed. At work, you are the seed. At home, you are the seed. In our neighborhoods, and schools, we are the seed. Even with opponents and enemies, we are the seed of the kingdom.

As we serve others, by pouring ourselves out for them in love we stand out as strikingly different from how the world works. We fulfill Jesus command "if you love one another as I have loved you, the whole world will know you are My disciples." Love, suffering love for others is the fingerprint of Jesus. It is what touches, moves, and brings about heart surrender in others.

·         Where has God placed you as the tiny seed He intends to use?

·         Do you have the attitude of Jesus of serving others in love or are we trying to exercise power over people?

·         Who are you, or can you serve in the love of Jesus?

 "The Kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed".......

Paul J. Murphy,  PROGRESS & JOY

www.progressandjoy.net

Paul Murphy has served 33 years as a pastor, encompassing two permanent senior pastorates and 13 intentional interim pastorates in “turnaround” situations --  churches going through crisis or transition.  Paul has served churches of varying sizes, denominations and demographics. He has also experience as an executive in the faith-based non-profit world. Paul’s heart is to see the church BE the body of Christ to a needy, lost world.

Paul founded his own nonprofit, called PROGRESS and JOY – taken from Philippians 1:25. Its focus is renewing churches, developing leaders here in the US and overseas in Haiti and Uganda.   Paul has worked with multiple denominations as well as consulting with urban, ethnic, and immigrant faith-based groups. His specialties are change management and leader development. He works with leaders through individual one-to-one coaching and group trainings called Servant Leader Boot Camp. He works with churches and ministries through conflict mediation and a participatory vision process called Church Check-Up. He is ordained with the Evangelical Free Church of America.

Paul and his wife Liz are both native Californians. They met in college and have been married for 37 years. They have 3 adult children and 1 grand-daughter. Paul and Liz live in the suburbs of the Twin Cities of Minneapolis, St Paul.

Pay attention to the EQ of those we interact with and save yourself great frustration

Think about the most problematic people you have dealt with and then consider the energy, time and frustration you experienced in trying to negotiate the relationship. Chances are good that you were dealing with individuals who had significant EQ deficits. Too often in these cases we deal with them as if they were rational, normal and reasonable individuals and we constantly hit the wall of frustration.

I am not suggesting they are "bad" people. I am suggesting that one needs to take the EQ of others into account in how we interact with them. Take for instance an individual who constantly brings up issues that they endlessly debate but they never seem able to come to resolution and put it to rest. Why get drawn into a conversation that never gets resolved? You are dealing with someone who is unable to resolve issues and their need to endlessly discuss them does not mean that we need to discuss them.

Here is a principle to keep in mind. The more frustration one experiences in dealing with another, the greater the likelihood that we need to reassess how we interact with them. And often, limit our interaction. Unhealthy individuals seek to draw others into their dishealth because that is where they are comfortable. Healthy individuals see this for what it is and refuse to get pulled in. Often the only way to do that is to limit one's exposure to those individuals and not get pulled into debates. I for one will not waste my time and energy trying to reason with unhealthy individuals. They are not open to reason.

That last statement is an important indicator of emotional health. You can have a productive conversation with a reasonable individual. Conversations with unreasonable people never seem to get anywhere. So why get pulled in? 

One can save themselves a lot of frustration by simply paying attention to the emotional health of those we interact with and modify our own interaction accordingly.

What is on your bucket list?

I suspect for frequent international travelers something like this may well be on the bucket list.

What It's like to Fly the $23,000 Singapore Airlines Suites Class

One of the most important attributes of leaders

One of the most important attributes of leaders is flexibility. I am not talking the physical kind but the flexibility to adjust their preferred plans in order to meet the needs of those they lead. Some things are not negotiable but there are far more things that are negotiable than most leaders recognize. 

In my upcoming book, Deep Influence, I write this about leaders and flexibility: 

"Leaders with high EQ are both self-defined and flexible. Their self-definition becomes a compass directionally, but within that direction they are highly flexible. For some, leadership is telling others what they will do and getting his way. For healthy leaders, the direction setting process includes other key stakeholders, leaving flexibility for them to choose strategies that will take the organization that direction.

In most situations where leaders are inflexible and need to get their own way, the inflexibility is not worth the effort it requires or the problems it causes. God’s design of church leadership as a team is based on the value of the counsel of multiple wise leaders. 

Many of the conflicts in which leaders find themselves are a direct result of either poor self-definition or inflexibility to negotiate a common course of action. The leader who is self-defined while also engaged in healthy relational dialogue is a master at flexibly helping other good people come to a common strategy that allows the ministry to move in the preferred direction. Black-and-white individuals tend to polarize rather than bring people together."

I encounter too many leaders whose inflexibility creates conflict which hurts their leadership and the organizations they lead. Ironically flexibility in how we achieve our ends gets us further and faster than inflexibility and the need to get our way! 

Flexibility also communicates that we are in this together and is is about us rather than me. Inflexible leaders irritate the very people they lead while flexible leaders are seen as reasonable and team players. Flexibility is also about humility. Pride says I need to get my way. Humility says I will work with others to achieve the ends but I am flexible in the way we get there. One polarizes and the other unites.

My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

The questions we don't ask enough

The Questions We Don’t Ask Enough

Lord have mercy!

For my sin and brokenness

Lord Have Mercy
For my pride and self sufficiency
Lord Have Mercy
For my neglect of You
Lord Have Mercy
For the horrors in the Middle East

Lord Have Mercy

For those who are victims of Ebola and fear

Lord Have Mercy

For those who suffer serious illness

Lord Have Mercy

For the divide in our country

Lord Have Mercy

For the marginalized and broken

Lord Have Mercy

For Christians under persecution

Lord Have Mercy

For those who suffer unjustly

Lord Have Mercy

For the brokenhearted

Lord Have Mercy

It is an ancient phrase found in the Psalms.

We need it daily more than ever.

Take a moment and listen to this wonderful song

and ask the Lord for Mercy where you need it today.

Lord Have Mercy

A cogent response to the Supreme Court's refusal to get in the way of Gay marriage

See this short article in MOOR to the POINT

Same-Sex Marriage and the Supreme Court: What Now for the Church?

Honoring the past while building for the future in the local church

I have a bone to pick with two groups in the local church. The first is with those who are so intent on preserving the past that they do not allow the church to move forward into the future. It is a recipe for a slow death and a slide into irrelevance. In fact, a focus on the past is one of the hallmarks of an institutional church that is inward looking and protective of anything that threatens the status quo. The past is the past and is not the path to the future.

The second is bone to pick is with those in the church (often pastors and leaders) who exclusively focus on the future to the marginalization of the past. Here are leaders who in their drive to be relevant to the next generation focus all energies and programming to the next generation at the expense of those who have come before - think older than 55. Just as the first group marginalizes the next generation, this group marginalizes the prior generation and have an attitude of, be flexible, get with it or find another place to worship.

Neither option is balanced and both marginalize people that God loves and are important to Him. 

I believe that we ought to honor the past while building for the future. Honoring the past means that we listen to the older generations who built the church, listen to their perspectives, seek to meet their needs and actively work to engage them in mentoring and coaching the younger generations. Because they are not the future does not mean they are no longer relevant and all of us find ourselves in that category sooner than later as we age.

Building for the future is absolutely critical as our challenge in the church is always to reach the next generation. That will mean that our ministry needs to be relevant to those upcoming generations. But, not to the marginalization of those who have come before. It saddens me when in our pragmatic culture we are willing to marginalize whole segments of our churches because they don't meet our targeted audience. I just cannot see Jesus doing that.

I talk to many seniors in local congregations who feel marginalized and unimportant to the ministry of the church. And I am not talking about selfish people. They simply wish the church cared about all people rather than some people. They want the next generation reached for Jesus but also want to be valued and engaged. It is all about honoring the past while building for the future.

My new book, Deep Influence: Unseen Practices That Will Revolutionize Your Leadership, is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

Leaders who are too busy to listen

There is often a conflict for leaders between their schedules, the maintenance of key relationships and having enough time to stop and carefully listen to those they interact with. The ability to listen and evaluate what is being shared is very different from listening on the run and not having the time to consider what was heard. And it is a common problem for leaders with out of control schedules.

Many individuals who talk to leaders feel that they were not heard and many are right. They were heard on the fly and what was shared was not truly considered because their leader was preoccupied with other issues and already moving on to the next thing as the conversation took place. 

The problem with this is twofold. First, good ideas and counsel can easily be missed or marginalized because a leader does not have the time to stop, listen and evaluate. Second, leadership depends on influence and influence comes from relationship. Leaders who do not listen well usually also don't keep key relationships and eventually lose influence. 

The question is not whether I "hear" those who talk to me but whether I have the time and energy to truly be present in the conversation and then the time to evaluate what was shared. Many leaders miss key information and commit significant blunders because they did not take the time to truly listen and evaluate. Their busyness comes back to bite them.

We will interact with many people today. Will we truly be present with them in those interactions and will we take the ideas, suggestions and concerns seriously because we stopped to think about it? It is both good leadership and respect for those we interact with.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Do you long for more? I highly recommend this book on the Holy Spirit

Jesus once offered an amazing promise: “How much more will your Father in Heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!” Luke 12:13.  Can you imagine a life in which you experience more of God’s love, more of His peace and power, more of His Presence in any and every circumstance? At one level, I’m sure all of us would say to that, Sign me up!  We long to experience these things in deeper ways in our lives. It is clear from Scripture that God longs for us to experience this as well. Which raises the obvious question: Why don’t we? Why aren’t we experiencing the “more” that Jesus promises?

            We can trot out the usual suspects in answering that question—busyness, distractions, sin. But if we’re honest, we realize that our struggle actually has a much deeper root. The joy, the peace, the power that are promised us in Scripture are all dependent upon our experiencing the Holy Spirit. And quite honestly, we’re not sure what to do with the Holy Spirit.

            We know He’s important. He’s talked about all the time throughout the Bible. We know He lives in every person who has placed their trust in Christ. All those things are fairly well settled in our minds. What we struggle to understand is how we experience Him? What does it look like to lean out the window and experience the Spirit more fully?

From chapter One: MORE: When a Little Bit of the Spirit is Not Enough, Alan Kraft

The biggest favor you can do for your pastor and your church

The biggest favor you can do for your pastor and church is to carefully guard the gate of who gets into church leadership. After 25 years of consulting with churches and church leaders I can fairly say that one of the top reasons that churches experience trouble comes down to one issue. They did not guard the gate and allowed the wrong people into leadership. It is also one of the most frustrating issues that pastors face. If you wonder why churches don't see more ministry results? Often it comes down to leadership in the church - the wrong leaders.

In addition, the larger the church the more critical this is as the leadership ability of leaders needed grows with church growth. Think of how carefully businesses vet those who they put in leadership and then consider how little attention is paid to who we put into church leadership where the stakes are eternal not quarterly. What amazes me is that even in churches where there have been significant issues, leaders still resist rethinking how they choose leaders. Personally I would not serve a church that did not take this seriously because it directly impacts the senior leader, staff and congregation.

Often I hear people say that anyone who is Godly is qualified to serve in church leadership. That is a fantasy! Yes, we all agree Godliness is necessary for church leadership but it is not the only qualification. What about wisdom; discernment; the ability to make hard decisions; the ability to think critically; the ability to think about the future; the ability to evaluate ministry and navigate tough issues? It is often said that the local church is the most complex organization in the world to lead (no other than Peter Drucker) and yet we are so lax in who we let in to lead. Is it any wonder we get ourselves into trouble? I know many wonderful Godly people who do not have the gift of leadership and do not belong in a leadership role. Bad leadership decisions in the church are the result of the wrong people in leadership!

Think about how carefully we choose a senior pastor for our congregations. We look at fit, character, Godliness, gifting, EQ, ability to lead, and many other things. And we mobilize the church to pray through the process. Then think of how little attention we pay to those who the senior pastor must work with and in many ways will either make him successful or not. This is a major disconnect in many churches. A great pastor and a problematic board never works well. Yet we pay attention to the first and little attention to the second. This does not compute! 

Let me ask:

• Does your church have a clear job description and list of qualifications for those who serve in church leadership?
• Do you train those who choose candidates as to what they are looking for?
• Do you train those who are going to serve on your board or do they just show up and have to figure it out themselves?
• How much prayer goes into the selection of church leaders?
• Do you vet for fit, character, godliness, ability to lead, EQ and what the board needs at this time?
• How would you rate the quality of your current board? Could you do better? What do you need to do to guard the gate better.

Bottom line, churches should pay as much attention to whom they put on the board as they do to whom they choose as a pastor. 

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.

Leading through change: Eight dumb taxes to avoid

All leaders must lead their constituency through change at one time or another. And, those of us who have done so have often learned some hard lessons along the way. Here are some of the lessons I have learned or watched others learn that constitutes dumb tax we don't need to pay.

1. Don't surprise people with big changes. Surprise brings with it fear, anxiety and the feeling that our security has been upended. If there is going to be major change, develop a process to bring people into discussion rather than simply dumping it on them and then trying to explain after. Once surprised, people are unlikely to hear your explanation. Lead into change over time and prepare people for what needs to come rather than surprising them.

2. Don't get so far ahead of people that they balk at following. Change need not be and often should not be all at once. Start with those things that you believe your constituency can understand and will follow you on. Some changes will take time and should be set aside for a day when you feel you will have greater support. This may mean talking to people of influence ahead of time to ascertain whether the changes you are proposing have a likelihood of meeting strong resistance. Go where you can go with the support of people rather than where it is going to face fierce resistance.

3. Determine what coinage you have before you propose major change. All leaders have a bank of good will. You need relationship and trust in order to convince people to go places that are uncomfortable. Moving too quickly may overspend your account which can take a long time to redeposit. Be smart about how much trust and relationship you have as the greater the change the more trust and relationship it requires. Don't overspend your account!

4. In explaining change, don't announce, dialogue. People don't like announcements that rock their world. Most, however will enter into a dialogue with you around strongly held values that if understood can help them move toward doing things differently. A conversation is very different than a pronouncement. The former invites understanding and discussion while the latter says "this is the way it is" and sound very much like an ultimatum - which are rarely helpful.

5. Be willing to be flexible on issues that are not essential. You don't want to die on a sand-hill but on a mountain. If you get major push-back on a non essential element of your preferred future, back off and show people that you are reasonable and can listen. Even leaders don't always get their way and probably shouldn't.

6. Talk to wise people. Don't ignore those who have been around for a while in leading through change. If they are resistant, take note. If you cannot get the key influencers on board with you to help you they will likely hurt you. I am not talking about laggards on the change scale but wise individuals of influence whom one needs to navigate successful change. If they balk, you may want to think about what you are proposing or the timing. 

7. Don't lose people you don't need to lose. It is a truism that some people will get off the bus when there is major change but one can minimize the fallout by paying attention to the principles above. Yes, some may leave but don't give people a good reason to leave - which us usually by not leading change wisely, pushing too fast, not running process, or not identifying one's coinage properly. They more you lose the more potential fallout you have on your hands to deal with.

8.  Never start to think this is my ministry and therefore I can get my agenda. No ministry is ever "my" ministry. It is "our" ministry together under the Lordship of Jesus. Just because I lead it does not mean I always get my way. If I expect others to be flexible and teachable so must I be. When leaders don't show the same flexibility they expect of those they lead, they are bound to get themselves into trouble.

All of T.J. Addington's books including his latest, Deep Influence,  are available from the author for the lowest prices and a $2.00 per book discount on orders of ten or more.